HEY! Get your acts together people!

CHRYSt · Feb 25, 2000

*CHRYSt's finger feels a little better, but it's still a pain to type...however...

*CHRYSt is headed over to the Sick Puppy ride (I bet you thought I had left the park!) when he notices Taskmaster and Tykeal killing each other repeatedly.

*Task glances over and notices CHRYSt coming in his direction

*Oh, crap! I guess this means I'm gonna die again soon says Taskmaster.

*CHRYSt pulls a small box out of his pocket

*Heeheehee! CHRYSt laughs exuberantly over his new toy.

*Hmmm...He seems to be ignoring me, thought Task.

*CHRYSt glances around suspiciously, and then goes back to fiddling with the box.

*Taskmaster suddenly finds himself beneath an anvil.

*Taskmaster respawns. "Jeez, that sucked."

*Task looks into the air wondering where the anvil came from. "I guess it fell off of one of the rides."

*CHRYSt is laughing hysterically

*Oh, well, I'm glad I can still entertain you, CHRYSt says Task.

*CHRYSt is laughing hysterically

*"What's so funny?"

*CHRYSt goes back to fiddling with his toy

*What have you got there?

*Fiddle fiddle*

*"Hey, I'm talking to y..."

*A swarm of rabid lemurs attack Task, devouring everything that isn't bone

*Task Respawns. "Hey, that hurt!"

*CHRYSt is loving it

*"Did you do that, you little bastard? asks Task

*CHRYSt nods and starts fiddling again

*Well, quit it. It really hurts.

*Fiddle fiddle*

*Task starts running towards CHRYSt, now realizing that the little box is one of the new -Kill Taskmaster At Home- remote controls that are on sale throughout the park.

*DON'T PUSH THAT BUTTON!!!

*Rooster appears out of nowhere, and hits Taskmaster with a shock rifle combo.

*Rooster dissapears again.

*CHRYSt is laughing his arse off

*Task respawns

*Look, if you don't quit that, I'm gonna get really pissed off...

*10,000 ninjas pop out from behing stuff, throw 10,000 shuriken into taskmaster, and go hiding behind stuff again.

*Taskmaster respawns

*A fat woman falls on top of Taskmaster

*Taskmaster respawns

*"look, quit..."

*Johnny the Homicidal maniac appears, uses his head exlpody power on Taskmaster (then goes and hacks up several innocent bystanders) and walks off

*Taskmaster respawns

*Taskmaster ducks and covers his head

*Nothing happens

*Taskmaster glances up nervously

*Nothing

*Task notices CHRYSt cursing at his little remote control

*"HAHA! Dead batteries!!!" Exclaims Taskmaster

*Task begins running towards CHRYSt with an enraged look. "I WILL HAVE MY REVENGE!!!!!"

*Task is telefragged by Tykeal

*CHRYSt is happy.

"Where's the BACTINE?! Some of this blood is MINE!!" -- JTHM

tykeal · Feb 25, 2000

*ROFL* I couldn't stop laughing it was great /~unreal/ubb/html/smile.gif

I belch in your general direction.

Taskmaster · Feb 25, 2000

"Hey I didn't like th---" exclaimed Taskmaster!

Task gets tramppled by herd of charging wild elephants...

*Taskmaster respawns

"No cut that ou----" yells Taskmaster.

Tasks get gored by a dozen bulls as they run down the street.

*Taskmaster respawns

"I REALLY mean i---" He starts to scream.

Taskmaster gets flattened by a steamroller.

*Taskmaster respawns

"I really hate Fridays!" cries Task to his counselor at the Betty Ford Clinic.

I declare myself to be the self-annointed voice of reason for PuF! Opinions expressed by Taskmaster are not necessarily those of Planet Unreal!

Taskmaster · Feb 25, 2000

Oh, by the way Funk, the first couple of stories had nothing really to do with UT - the juggler, the glass-eating clone, the mime, etc. where not about UT. Just about geting killed in creative and, hopefully, humorous ways. /~unreal/ubb/html/smile.gif

I declare myself to be the self-annointed voice of reason for PuF! Opinions expressed by Taskmaster are not necessarily those of Planet Unreal!

tykeal · Feb 25, 2000

*Task's counselor responds by pressing the button on her new remote control.

I belch in your general direction.

CHRYSt · Feb 25, 2000

*Taskmaster has contracted a particularly quick working strain of that flesh eating bacteria

"Where's the BACTINE?! Some of this blood is MINE!!" -- JTHM

Taskmaster · Feb 25, 2000

* Taskmaster showers with a bottle of anti-bacterial soap to kill all the bacteria.

* Taskmaster applies some full body conditioner to restore all the flesh eaten by the bacteria.

* Taskmaster make stupid faces in the mirror trying to be hot and sexy - but fails.

* Taskmaster wishes he was young again....

I declare myself to be the self-annointed voice of reason for PuF! Opinions expressed by Taskmaster are not necessarily those of Planet Unreal!

ZenMasterV · Feb 25, 2000

intersting, but truthfully their not that funny to me.. prolly cuz i have twisted sense of humor sorry /~unreal/ubb/html/frown.gif /~unreal/ubb/html/frown.gif

tykeal · Feb 25, 2000

*A rhino comes charging in after Task and turns tail and runs from the atrocity of Task's pose.

Ooops, now there's a good reason to not be young anymore /~unreal/ubb/html/wink.gif

I belch in your general direction.

tykeal · Feb 25, 2000

That's a pity Funk.

People say I have a warped sense of humor too, but then again, I also have a tendency to have fairly "earthy" humor... must be the farmer in my blood (only about 2 generations away).

I belch in your general direction.

CHRYSt · Feb 26, 2000

*CHRYSt sets his remote to target Funkmaster

*Funkmaster is engulfed in a cloud of cyanide

**Funkmaster does not respawn

"Where's the BACTINE?! Some of this blood is MINE!!" -- JTHM

ZenMasterV · Feb 26, 2000

wow i can just the feel the love in this thread

tykeal · Feb 26, 2000

Oh my.... poor FuNkMaStEr.

I belch in your general direction.

wiz4ha · Feb 26, 2000

wow! i've missed alot. I've been gone for 3 days, and the topic is at 90! Last time i posted it was near 40.

ah well...

*Wiz shows up after many days of being gone and shows off his great looking haircut

*Everyone is amazed by the new dew, clapping and cheering as they stare at his Dark Brown hair

(*For posting this, I'll probably die somehow like getting telefragged from Tykeal, or maybe die from just one of CHRYSt's odd thoughts flowing through his mind*)

WiZ
Smiley Games

"What is Mind? No Matter.
What is Matter? Never Mind"

Taskmaster · Feb 28, 2000

"Can you feel the love tonight?" sings Taskmaster as CHRYSt plays the piano.

"Tooo night!" sing the mellow backup singers

* Taskmaster punches Wiz4ha across the jaw with a right cross for talking while he is singing!

"When the moon shines bright...." croones Task.

* Taskmaster kicks Wiz4ha hard in the ribs for spitting blood on the stage as he sings.

"It's enough for a wide-eyed wonderer..." Task pretends to know the words.

* Taskmaster bludgeons Wiz4ha on the skull with the microphone stand for gasping and wheezing from the hard kick in the side, disrupting Task's musical performance.

"Expect the very beeeeessssstttttt!" finishes Task!

* Taskmaster screams at the dead corpse of Wiz4ha for getting his blood all over the female undergarmets that are being thrown on the stage!

(Sorry Wiz4ha, but you asked for it by ignoring us! You can't ignore ME! I won't allow it!!) /~unreal/ubb/html/smile.gif

I declare myself to be the self-annointed voice of reason for PuF! Opinions expressed by Taskmaster are not necessarily those of Planet Unreal!

Morety · Feb 28, 2000

*Then in walks Morety. A hush grows across the crowd as people wonder "who the hell is that guy, and why is he walking into the centre ring?" Morety then lays down on his back as the hushed crowd looks on, wonderingly. He undoes the string to his Toronto Maple Leaf track pants, and drops them to knee level as he lay on his back with his knees up to his chest. He then pulls out his trusty zippo, sparks it up, and strategically places it adjacent to his exposed anus. Taking a deep breath, and bearing down, PHHHHHHHHTTTTTTTTTTTT, a ball of flame shoots out from between his buttcheeks. Astonished, the crowd looks on in silence, until the single, slow clap clap clap of Chryst starts echoing eerily in the silent hall. Chryst stands as he claps. Then another joins in, then another and another as the clapping rises to a deafening roar. Morety, however, was slow to rise. He gingerly pulls his track pants back up and walks very penguin-like to the bathroom looking for some Solar-Cain to put on his burnt arse.

Here's Lucy, she's choosy who calls her on the phone. She's from a very rich foreign family, but displaced it, 'cause of rivalry at home.

wiz4ha · Feb 28, 2000

I ignored you? hehe, i had matters to attend to, so the PU forums were on hold. heheh...nice death for me though...just how i always wanted to die. =P

WiZ
Smiley Games

"What is Mind? No Matter.
What is Matter? Never Mind"

wiz4ha · Feb 28, 2000

Now, let me think.... I remember going to the meeting when...

WiZ
Smiley Games

"What is Mind? No Matter.
What is Matter? Never Mind"

[This message has been edited by wiz4ha (edited 02-28-2000).]

[This message has been edited by wiz4ha (edited 02-28-2000).]

wiz4ha · Feb 28, 2000

I did goto the meeting with the intentions of hurting Mr. Burns...

"Blast! I must have grabbed mothers make up kit!"

"Excuse me ma'am....Oh my lord.. Skinner!!!"

WiZ
Smiley Games

"What is Mind? No Matter.
What is Matter? Never Mind"

[This message has been edited by wiz4ha (edited 02-28-2000).]

wiz4ha · Feb 28, 2000

I know the 2 above things make no sense when put together, but, Can you name that Simpsons episode?!?!

***Bonus points if you acuratly name the episode number***

WiZ
Smiley Games

"What is Mind? No Matter.
What is Matter? Never Mind"

HEY! Get your acts together people!

You can't help that. We're all mad here.

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