The necris story

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NeoNite

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Oh to hell with it then.
Appearantly no one is interested, aside from Zenda and zd_phoenix. Tnx guys.

Look, I don't want to sound uptight or anything, or like a whiner, :( but honestly, almost nobody gave me constructive criticism or .. anything. Maybe it has something to do with me still not being a part of the group ah well.. screw it.

I'm not angry you know.. more like dissapointed but hey.. that's life. I'm used to it already.

Again, a big tnx to zenda and phoenix for giving comments on the story. I'll not forget it :)

out.
 

_Zd_Phoenix_

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It's a shame it ended there, I was starting to see real promise in that. But I wouldn't take the lack of reception to this personally, I think that people cannot be bothered with the story threads on here.

I know Xadoom's story was met with little responce a while back, and look at the tournament story thread, im finishing it now with a readership of....1, being me.

I dont knopw why the threads with alot of work in them or the serious ones get dismissed by many (eg, the god thread) but they do. Life suks huh? ;)
 

Zenda

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Hi there. I got back about 01:00 this morning after being out all day.

Not so much humor in this episode, but I can feel the wit still operating as you add cross cultural effects ... eg: the Necris use of 'compadre'. It's creating a kind of subtle and uncomfortable dynamis tension that balances what could have been a monochrome race-hatred. IMO it's creating a very stable base that accounts for the ambiguity of the Necris/Earth relations as hinted in the 'broken agreement' section in which what woul dhave been a smooth trade agreement has been messed up by what seems likely to be some as yet unidentified minority.

Because of this the gung-ho 'mommy's going to bring a brain home' has somewhere to go, to develop. I can forsee some very interesting twists and turns in terms of movement toward gradual awakening of the factions involved.



Yeah, and to echo Phoenix, I'm also sad it's going to finish here.

There have been times in my life when I have managed to write for more than a page and to remain coherent. So I not only appreciate your output but I also appreciate the effort that went into it.


:)
 

NeoNite

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I don't know what to say guys :)
Hm maybe it shouldn't end here.. screw the others :) if they don't feel like saying anything at all.. ah well. that's life.
A moment of weakness ,please forgive me :D
I'll start writing a part 4 to this story. It NEEDS a sequel! :D damn it!

btw Phoenix i've copied your last post in the "tournament thread" ina word document file. Maybe if it's ok with you, i'll continue the story. SO I guess you're not alone anymore on this :)

Things are starting to get really serious, so I guess i'll have to cut back on the humour a bit, only a bit.
But it won't end here. Tnx to you 2. You've convinced me in making another part to this story. :)
 

Zenda

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The story line is getting densewith interestintg possiblities.
And as you say, it NEEDS a sequel.

Music has tended to be my creative output. That moment when the existence of an audience has become less important than the needs of the product/creation has sometimes been what has kept me going into doing really good stuff. Against all odds.

Cutting back on the humour a bit? So be it. :) Let's face it, I think I know what you mean when you say that things are getting really serious.

Follow your instincts.

My feedback is well meaning and reasonably articulate. Unfortunately it is also severely contaminated by my personal preferences! The last part was less humourous but the laugh was still there. Without havig read the last bit since last night i can still remember the bit where the Blademaiden is going to bring a human brain back for the child. And the throwaway comment is that the human brain is believed to be very small. :D The build up of serious tension is also very compelling.

See ya tomorrow:)
 
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NeoNite

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Ah but the humour WILL make it's comeback in the story :) be patient..
Ok, here's part 4. I don't know how many other parts will follow, maybe 4-5 i'll see :)
Tnx again for the feedback Zenda. I appreciate it.
To be honest, I prefer making drawings instead of writing stories...:)
I used to draw a lot of comics. :)

Part 4 : The beginning of the end
****************************

They’re all death. My brothers, my sisters.. all of them. Not a single one has survived the brutal human attack. We stood no chance. We were completely outnumbered. There was no other option but to retreat. This is the end! The very end of the Necris !!!

“Loque”, Rhaynor whispered,” wake up compadre, we’re about to assault the human base!”
“Oh yeah,.. I .. I was dreaming away … I’m sorry”, Loque sighed.
“Not now idiot”, said a man with a grim voice. It was Malakai, he was kind off nervous.
He and his 15 fellow Phayders were hiding behind a rock formation. Downhill was the human base. It was mighty big. And it’s defensive systems were not be underestimated.
There were 5 guards patrolling the area. They wore heavy battle suits and carried large Tazer guns.
“Well, looks like we’re in for a challenge right?”, Barak whispered.
“Hmm yeah”, Lyque sniffed.
“What’s the battle plan? How are we going to take over that base?”, Zoljo asked.
“Malakai?”, Rhaynor looked at his leader.
“Uh well a Claw grip formation afcourse, what else?”, Malakai stumbled.
Loque frowned. “What? A “Claw grip” on a base like this? It would only take out half of the guards, and the others would immediately sound the alarm bell! So long invasion!”
Malakai pressed his lips together.
“Maybe .. maybe not ..ok.. OK bad idea”. He sounded a bit irritated. I mean, he’s the leader right? He ought to know best ?
“Hmkay, so what do YOU suggest then, Loque?”, Malakai grinned.
“Me?” Loque turned his head towards the other Phayders. It was as if they knew Loque was the man with the plan.
“Well, you DO have a plan, don’t you? I mean, I do have this other brilliant idea but”..
Before Malakai could finish his sentence Loque interrupted him.
“Yes I do have a plan, it might work! I saw it in “the Unreal Tournament, this game I’m playing and…”.
“Say what???”, Pharon whispered, “a game? What are you talking about Loque?”
“Oh it’s ok I know what he’s talking about, my dad plays the game in his spare time”, said Tygrun,” go ahead Loque. We’re open to all ideas.”
Loque started talking: “It goes a bit like this…”

Jupiter. The Phalanx and 15 of the most important ships were hanging around the moon called Europe. They were still cloaked.
A third of the Necris army was approaching Earth, also cloaked , invisible for human technology.
Zenith was in command of the beautiful Phalanx. She enjoyed being captain of a fierce Necris army. It was her childhood dream to command a starhship and it’s fleet.
Her mother was one of the 3 commanders who had lead the counterstrike against Earth, all those many years ago. It was a devastating war, the Necris suffered many losses, but in the end, they had caused serious damage on Earth. One third of it’s population was kidnapped or killed.
If a human “prisoner of war” was still in good shape, he or she was to be brought back to Necron. There they would be enslaved or sacrificed.
The wounded were killed instantly. Their blood was being saved for supplying the Necris’ aerocats etc…
But it didn’t end there. The Necris kept attacking Earth and the killing went on. Their raids became worse and worse.
The human race was starting to become really afraid of the Necris. But again, it didn’t suffice. It would never seem to end.
This attack was simply one of the most important raids on Earth.

In the end, the Necris wanted nothing less but the total destruction of the human race.
The past could never be forgotten.

“Captain, an incoming message from the Phayder team on Mars!”, a young officer shouted.
“Well what are you waiting for Gral (Gral = junior luitenant)?”, Zenith spoke.
“They have successfully invaded the human base and shut down the power”, the Gral smiled.
“Open a direct com channel to their leader”, Zenith shouted!

Malakai walked across the control room. He kicked a human body, to make sure if the man was actually dead or still alive.
“Well that makes all of them”, he sighed.
“Yeah but we’ve lost Lyque, Pharon and Kosak.”, Rhaynor whispered.
Malakai looked at him.
“They’ve sacrificed themselves, if it wasn’t for them, the human guards in the third room would have been able to alert their superiors. We should honour them. Their bravery will not be forgotten.”
“What is that .. thing .. you’re holding in your hand Dessloch?”, Loque asked.
“Hmmm don’t know. It looks weird doesn’t it?”, Dessloch mumbled,” think I’ll take it back home, could make a nice souvenir.”
“It looks nice”, Loque said with a calm voice. The attack wasn’t all that bad. Heck, his crazy plan actually worked! And he was surprised he was able to take the strain and fight like any fierce Necris warrior would.
His first real battle. And it wouldn’t be his last.
Dessloch observed Loque for a while.
“What? What’s the matter?”, Loque stumbled.
“You like this thing?” Dessloch asked.” I mean, if you do, you can have it. Somehow.. I don’t know why.. it might come in handy for you…”
“Say, you’re right, … you’re ok with it? I can have it?” Loque was surprised.
Dessloch gave him the “thing”.
“There you go compadre”, he smiled. Now don’t lose it.”

All of the sudden Malakai shouted:” silence! The captain of the phalanx is transmitting a message! I’ll let an hologram appear!”
A holographic version of Zenith did appear in the control room.
“Job well done, my brave Phayders. Are there any losses?”, Zenith asked.
“ 3 brave Necris warriors”, Rhaynor replied.
“…What were their names?”, Zenith whispered.
“ Lyque Rhynor, Pharon Kumukra and Kosak Tikyri”, Rhaynor sighed. Kosak was also one of his best “compadres”. “Thanks to them, we were able to succeed in this mission.”
“ Their names won’t be forgotten”, spoke Zenith. A short moment of silence followed.
“Shri-taki, brave warriors !” Zenith shouted.
Shri taki meant, if translated in human language, “ you will live forever”.
Zenith continued:” Now the time has come, we shall commence our attack on the space stations. Malakai, when I give the signal, you will drop the shields on the first station, called Ares, the station orbiting the mars moon phobos. I will send 50 Razors to the mars base, just in case a human war party may engage an attack on it.”
“Very well captain”, Malakai smiled.

And so it began. The Ares moon station was totally surprised when the first Razors commenced their brutal attack.
They tried fighting back, but it was of no use. The Necris were prepared, strong and determined. The assault only lasted for 15 minutes.
Then the other space stations followed…

A Necris war party started investigating the Ares space station.
The Blaidenmaiden had suffered no losses. The way they had executed this professional attack, was beyond appraisal.
The Orbiting mars moon looked beautiful.

Laque walked towards the edge of the gigantic space station. Althought the human technology isn’t as advanced as theirs, the station was great to look at.
The build was the most impressive of all. Laque detested humans, but somehow admired their art and architectural skills.
“Admiring the space station, oh fierce leader”, said an asthonished Blaidenmaiden.
It was Cali, one of the youngest members of the clan. She was also knows as the most ruthless one.
“Maybe”, Laque smiled,” you have to admit, the build isn’t that bad.”
Cali looks around her. “Hm yeah maybe”, she grins”, but ah I hate the colors”
“Damn right”, laque mumbled, “ the colors are awful. Bah, typical human idiocy, spoiling great art with awful colors”
Cali laughed. “What do you expect?”
“You’re absolutely right”, laque smirked, “ now come on, we have a job to do”.
The Blaidenmaiden had to “hack” the human consoles and mainframes to gain access to the shield surrounding Earth.
No big deal. It would only take up to ten minutes.

Visse was hacking one of the 4 important consoles, stationed in the belly of the space station.
“There, all done”, she laughed.
“That was ****ing quick girl” Jared smiled.
“Well, I was always the first one to make a kill when we went hunting”, Visse grinned.
“Oh you’re talking about you and…” jared asked but she couldn’t finish her sentence. The other Blaidenmaiden opened fire on a human squadron attacking the space station !
“HIDE”, Visse shouted !!!
Blaidenmaiden are known to be very agile and quick. It took them less than 10 seconds to take save cover and man their ships. 3 took of and terminated the human squadron.
“Five ****ing minutes”, Arachne said with a heavy voice,” we’re getting old you know, it used to take us but 3 minutes!
“Bitching”, Nocturna cried, “and started dancing on the surface of the space station.
“Cool your jets, Nocturna”, Laque shouted,” we’re not there yet.

The other space stations were apprehended by the Necris in no time.
Zenith was ready. There she stood, on the bridge, looking at Earth. The Phalanx had already approached the Earth moon, but it was still cloaked. So was over 60 % of the fleet.
“Drop the shield”, she shouted in the com channel!!!
And so it happened, the shield dropped. Of course the human army was aware of the Necris attack by now, they were sending a large war party of dozens of fighters to meet the Necris fleet.
Then it happened. The cloaked ships dropped their cover and all of sudden, it seemed as out of nowhere, dozens and dozens of Necris ships appeared. The humans stood no chance.
And so the attack on Earth commenced !

“Ready to slash’n’hack girl”, Visse whispered to Jared.
“Anytime, anywhere on Earth”, Jared laughed.
The Blaidenmaiden watched the Necris fleet making mince meat out of the humans. Soon it would be their turn to engage an attack on the biggest cities.

Loque and the other Phayders were already on their way.
“Now the fun really begins!”, Rhaynor laughed to Loque.
“I couldn’t agree more”, Loque smiled back.
“Heck, I promised my kid to bring back a human brain”, Rhaynor smirked.
“I’m sure you will”. Loque turned his head at the window and looked at the Ares space station.
“See you real soon, Visse”, he whispered.
 

Zenda

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Good stuff:)

I like the way that it goes from wide to narrow scope and back again. The visual analogy I would use here is the photographic one of the zoom lens on a camera. A fleet of cloaked Necris ships. Powerful image in any event as they reveal their presence.

However, the emphasis is made more focussed and powerful as the dialogue between the spaceborne team and the ground team with Loque,... "Shri-taki, brave warriors !" ... Has made the whole thing very close up and personal.

The light relief is nice ... "Bah, typical human idiocy, spoiling great art with awful colors" ... To some extent it is the 'In'Joke-ness' that gets me :). A bit like that time when a clan of Necris were having fun with a human slave. I've got to be familiar with the UT voices or I won't get it. And here are the Necris doing a Nali City on a newly conquered base. LOL

I must admit I'm very curious as to how what seems to be a total wipe-out of the Humans is going to progress. And just what is that thing that Dessloch has given to Loque?

It's very exciting for the reader to be introduced to such a significant peice of Necris history.





Now for a bit of a ramble ... i think it could also apply to the UT fiction thread that, I think Creator started, and Phoenix, Gabriel and co were working on.

Basically it's this.

I played a game called Daggerfall a few years ago. it was part 2 in 'the Elder Scrolls chronicles. I'm looking forward to part three. I have plaed one or two other games that have taken place in that world. they have been very accessible and in some way familiar to me from the start because they capitalise on an already existing world.

Similarly with Outcast. I know that I am going to go for the Outcast 2 when it comes out. Yves Grolet and the gang did really good stuff in Outcast 1 [OK it was a bit of a first person sitback and witness the hilarious and never-ending dialog-'em-up, but it suited me.

Now Unreal Tournament has a sketchy concept of the its word. There's not a lot of continuity with Na Pali. So you and the others are not just adding a bit of detail. The user - created literature, the Unreal Community Vision IS building the surrounding context in which the game gets played..

I was doing botmatch in David M's award-winning 5-cubes map. Me and 7 bots. Theres Freylis - agressive and jumpy as usual ... but the whole feeling was different. And it's brcause she is now a warrior who's family are engaged in war. Her background is current and robust.


I call it this ramble because it's one thing to have ongoing thoughts as a keen reader about the plot as it develops, but this is to do with my sense of appreciation that you are writing it at all, and the overall effect of the existence of this work on my experience of the game and the Unreal World.

cya :)
 

_Zd_Phoenix_

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Sorry I didn't read this sooner, but I only just noticed it. I think the concept of looking at an attack on Earth through a Necris point of view is great :) Many people would choose to do it through the humans but I think I like your way better.

I know what Zenda means too, it is always better when the characters you are playing have a history.

So when can we expect Part 5?
 

NeoNite

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:)

I still don't know what to say...
I really appreciate the feedback. And yes Zenda, what is a story without personages who don't have a background, no history, past ..anything? :(

The Necris point of view works best for the story.. so i'll keep it that way. Humans are on the background this time.

YES YES YES YES YES YES YES :D I'm finishing this story, i'm sorry i've been gone for a day :) i WILL write part 5 and 6 and maybe 7 or 8 we'll see.. I'll be posting it really soon.

:) And i already have an idea for another story, ... but I ain't telling yet :D
 

Zenda

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Seconded :)

Though I appreciate it was a close thing.

--------------------------------------------------------------------
The Necris point of view works best for the story.. so i'll keep it that way. Humans are on the background this time.
--------------------------------------------------------------------

Yeah ... I think that's one of the things that really does it for me.

cya :)
 

NeoNite

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Ok here's part 5. 6 pages this time :)
I'm already working on a another story, it's no sequel.. more like a eh.. you'll see :D

Part 5: They will repent…
***********************

And so it began.. the hundreds of Razors, follwed by dozens of Grallinz entered the earth atmosphere, engaging attacks on earth’s biggest metropoles.
Earth had changed a lot during the last 3 centuries. There were only 250 million humans left.
Back in the late 21st century a horrible techno virus wiped out 80% of earth’s population.
Only 1.4 billion survived. But it was not the end of the misery. Then came the fifth world war. It lasted from 2090-2105. Fifteen horrible years, and again, a horrible loss for humanity. 1 billion died in that war.

The early 22nd century wasn’t much better. No world wars or techno viruses this time, but dissension. People were divided in small camps, separated…
Then came the smaller “gang-wars”. Camps fighting it out, simply cause they couldn’t stand one another.
But the 5th world war also caused the continents to move. Also some countries were completely wiped out ,vanished…
2259 introduced a new era for mankind. People were sick and tired of being divided. So their leaders came together and agreed in merging all small lands into one state.
The Neo Earth Conglomerate was born. Why conglomerate? Because the new earth leaders were the dark corporations, born out of the ashes of the Genocide conflicts, back in the late 22nd and early 23rd century
Before they were enemies, now they were partners. This was merely the beginning, the mistrust wouldn’t vanish like that, it would take decades to unite the remains of the human race.
Huge “Bridges” were build, to close the gap between the continents known as America, Europe and Asia, back in the 21st century.
These Bridges were called the “technolands”. Along the coasts of these Bridges rose many technocities, each inhabited my many humans and other species, the visitors.
The visitors were no one less than inhabitants from close star systems.
The oceans were also polluted, nothing more than huge pools of filth, death and decay.
Many seas were gone, dried up. What was left was a huge crater, a deep canyon…

The Humans were afraid of going into these canyons, they were inhibited by Mutants, crossbreeds ( a bloody marriage between human and other species).
If it wasn’t for the dark corporations, earth would start to rebuild. But that was merely a dream.
Dreams hadn’t died on earth. There were still poets, writers and many other artists, but …
Their work wasn’t really appreciated, and they were nothing but social outcasts.
It was if time stood still on this once blue and wonderful planet.

The Necris didn’t care. Their first Assaults were on the capitals of Ergonon, one the biggest states on earth. Again, the humans weren’t prepared and the Necris were victorious.
It was a beautiful day for the Necris race. They knew the humans were still divided, not as before, but the team spirit wasn’t present.

The first Necris war parties invaded the Capital, after having it bombed for over 5 hours.
It were the Phayders.

Malakai jumped over the debris. What was once an impressive building, owned by the Grundack Corporation, was now reduced to a bloody ruin.
He shot a human soldier. And another one who all of the sudden jumped from behind a wall.
“Sooo there you go, I always knew that Reaper would come in handy”, Malakai laughed.
“Damn fine gun, I agree,” Rhaynor sighed,” If only I had one of those…”.
“Hey”, Malakai grinned,” this baby has cost me 16 pairs of human eyes. It was worth it!”.
“Lucky”, Loque whispered.
Rhaynor looked at him.
“So.. Loque, how are we feeling?”, he asked.
Loque frowned.
“You NEED to ask, compadre?”, he laughed, “ we’ve successfully invaded and beaten a human metropolis. THE biggest metropolis.”
“Hehehe, yes, it’s a great day for the Necris, isn’t it?” Rhaynor smiled.
“Sure is”. Loque walked towards a wall, and noticed the huge poster.
“What are you looking at Loque”, Barak asked.
“I don’t know well.. this is weird”, Loque stumbled, “ I saw it one of the previous raids on earth, but that was before I’ve found the game and...”
“Come to the point”, Barak sighed.. He knew Loque could be very very chatty when excited.
“OH well, you see, in this game I’m playing..”, Loque continued but Rhayon interrupted him.
“Grown men shouldn’t be playing games anymore compadre”, he laughed.
“Yeah yeah whatever” Loque said with an impatient tone in his voice.
“Look the thing is, you see the name on the poster?”
“Hmm yes it says époque rising games”, Rhaynor whispered.
“No no, in the left corner of the poster”, Loque almost shouted.
“Wow cool your engines compadre”, Rhaynor laughed,” let’s see .. Li-an-driii ..corporation…
Rhaynor likes to mess around with his friend.
“Yah ok, so the Liandri corporation are the ones responsible for this huge tournament in the game..”, Loque continued.
“ So?”, Rhaynor asked with a silly voice.
“Well I don’t know.. I thought Liandri was .. well..i’m sure they’ve made up that name.. I mean”, Loque stumbled once again.
“Hm but it’s not.. it actually exists”, Rhaynor whispered.
“Yes!”, Loque shouted.
“So, where does that leave us .. I mean”, Rhaynor continued,” what does this have to do with us? And the current attack on Earth?”
Loque opened his mouth, but didn’t know anything to say aside from…
“I . I just think it’s weird.. you know”, he sighed, “ I wonder where the Liandri corporation is established ? I mean, what if it’s right here, in this metropolis? I feel like it’s worth checking out.”
“Why Loque”, Rhaynor laughed, “it’s just another dark corporation on the face of this planet”.
Loque stared sulking.
“Oh really, go ask Malakai if he knows of the whereabouts of the Liandri corporation you never know..”, Rhaynor sighed.
“Yeah maybe.. maybe he can help me out”, Loque smiled.

Malakai was meeting the leader from the Zungrin clan. The Zungrin had finished their raid through the streets of the metropolis.
“So, anyone knows the whereabouts of the capital building yet?”, Malakai whispered.
“Yes”, T’kAnn sighed,” finally we’ve been able to locate it. It’s well hidden, deep into the bowels of the city. It’s a jungle out there.
“So, when are we going to attack it, my fingers are itching!”, Malakai snarled.
“Patience leader of the Phayders”, T’Kann said with a heavy voice, “ Zenith will keep you up to date.”
“Ooohkay”, Malakai mumbled.
“Anyway”, T’Kann continued, “we have to go now, and meet the other clans at the technocentre. Our commander Aryss will be waiting there.
“Aryss, the former captain of the Phalanx, right?” Malakai whispered.
“Damn right”, T’kann almost shouted.
“So.. is he coping with his loss, I mean is he doing all right..?”. Malakai just had to know, somehow he still admired Aryss, he believed it wasn’t his fault for what had happened on board of that ship, a long long time ago.
T’kann sighed. “He’s a fine commander”..

Visse kicked a human skull in the nearby river. A black river that is. Visse kind off licked it.
It was dark an beautiful, and dangerous. She looked at her reflection: pale skin, white eyes, black hair.. shiny armor, human blood on her hands. She started smiling. It was as if she had never felt so alive in her entire life.
“Hellllllllllo you little nymphomaniac, we’re about to raid the outskirts of the technocity,” Laque laughed,” are you with me?”
“Oh oh yeah heh”, Visse grinned,” I .. I was only ..you know..”
“Yes I know girl”, Laque smiled,” but save it for when we’re done here. Sure we have beaten the army who was defending the city, but we can’t forget about the small war parties and gangs.”
“We need to weed them out!”, Jared cried,” kill ‘em all! Kill ‘em aaaaaaaall!”
Laque nodded.
“Damn right we do”, she shouted,” now get ready, we’re about to kick some human skull!”
“I can’t wait to slith another throat”, Arachne yelled!
Visse took her special bladegun. The gun fired 10 small blades every 2 Kraylins (One Kraylin= 0.75 seconds)
You could compare them to small fish hooks. Once attached to a prey, the only way to get them out was losing a limb or a huge chunk of meat.
“First one to rip of a head, may drink the eyeball juice!!!”, Laque yelled and ran towards the outskirts!
The other Blaidenmaiden cried and followed their brave leader.

“What’s our status?”, Aryss yelled. He was commanding the Alpha Necris Freylon.
Freylons were small hovering “tanks”. The sound of the huge lasercannons, the battle cries, the yelling of the ones being killed, the collapsing buildings, the razors flying over the city…
“We’re breaking through the defense grid surrounding the Capital building!”, Habran shouted throught the com channel.
“Good work luitenant-shra”, Aryss yelled back,” show them what we’re made off!”
“Yes sir!”, Habran cried.
It was very hectic in the Freylon’s control room. The Yellow flashing lights, the men and women manning the consoles, incoming messages on the com channels.
But they didn’t complain. They actually liked situations like these. Necris were a war breed.

“An incoming message from the Phalanx, sir”, said a young female tech.
“Open a holochannel”, Aryss shouted.
Zenith, captain of the mighty Phalanx, appeared on the holoboard, right in front of the commander’s seat.
“Commander Aryss”, Zenith said with a firm voice,” what is your status?”
“We’re doing fine”, Aryss sighed,” we’ve almost breached through the defense grid surrounding the Capital building We’re almost there.”
“Excellent work commander”, Zenith said with a soft voice.
She knew much about Aryss his past on the Phalanx, and like other Necris she didn’t agree with what he had done, but she still admired the true Necris in him. The warrior, the leader.
Starting with a clean slate was a wise decision. That’s what she liked to believe.
“I’ll order the ground troops to assemble at the Capital building in one third of a quatron. Zenith out.”
Aryss turned around and shouted: “Well, what are we waiting for, alert all Necris clans! Send all Freylons and Razors to the C.B.!

The Blaidenmaiden were still raiding the dark outskirts of the devastated city.
Arachne took her Slasher (large sharp sword) and decapitated a human.
“Seee-weeet!”, she grinned.
She grabbed inside her left pocket and took out a small notebook. Then she used a small blade to cut open the arm of the human, laying in front of her.
“Need.. something… to ..write of course”, she smiled.
“Hm.. dark nice, red blood. Just what I need!”
Without hesitating one moment she plunged the sharp little blade in the small “pool” of blood.
“Now let’s see, that’s the fifth one I’ve decapitated today.. and already dismembered …7”, she sighed, “do I love these raids or what?”
All of the sudden a human scavenger jumped at her from behind a wall. Completely overwhelmed she fell on the ground and the human grabbed her arms.
Arachne started hissing and growling.
The human spitted her in the face.
“Shut up Necris wench”, he shouted.
“You you dirty, filthy rat”, she snarled.
The human paused. He had a rough time trying to keep that wild blaidenmaiden under control.
“You know, I always wanted to know what it’d be like, ****ing a ..”
But all of the sudden 3 small sharp blades appeared from under Arachne’s glove. She broke out of the humans’ grip, and cut of his nose and upper lip.
The human rat fell on the ground, yelling and screaming, waving his arms like a madman, trying to protect himself.
Suddenly Arachne heard footsteps nearby. Nothing to fear, it were Jared and Nocturna
They looked at her sister and then at the filthy human rat.
“Did this .. thing.. cause you any harm, sister,” Jared said with a voice filled with anger and rage.
“No, ..but he did call me a wench”, she growled.
“WHAT?”, Nocturna cried, “this piece of human **** called you, a member of the proud Necris race, a WENCH?”
“You know, I do enjoy a good kill”, Jared hissed,” but most of the times dead comes rather quickly.. too quick if you ask me.”
“I agree”, Nocturna growled”, let us skin this rat, let us take him apart, piece ….by piece”.
“You have the honor Arachne, “ Jared smiled,” where would you like to begin?”
“We’ll start at his feet, and work our way up”, she growled.
The 3 blaidenmaiden grabbed the human. The small critters populating the nearby sewers ran away scared when they heard the loud yelling, echoing through the dark neighbourhood.

“Can you? Can you tell me Malakai?”, Loque asked.
Malakai was getting pretty sick and tired of loque’s begging and “whining”.
“Give it a rest, Phayder!!!!”, he shouted,” I’m not sure if there’s a Liandri corporation in this city, this place is huge!!! And even if there was, I’m pretty sure it’s already bombed or being raided. It is of no interest!! Now cut it out!!!”
“Oh okay”, Loque sulked.
Rhaynor smiled at his buddy.
“Yeah well, see I told you it was a lost cause, now didn’t I?”, he laughed.
“Hey you were the one encouraging me asking Malakai if he knew about the Liandri corp!!”, Loque shouted.
“Okay”, Rhaynor sighed,” but it’s just.. we both knew it was a waste of time, right ? Heck, I’m even surprised you actually did ask him!”
“I’m .. only curious.. about..”, Loque stumbled.
“Phayders!”, Malakai shouted all of the sudden,” we should be going on our way, all clans are meeting at the Capital building of the technocity!”
And so the Necris Phayders climbed aboard of their ship, took off and set course to the rendez vous point.
“Don’t worry Loque”, Rhaynor whispered,” maybe.. maybe we’ll accidentally come across the building.. you know??
“Yeah right”, Loque sighed,” It’s just… I have this feeling, there’s more to this Liandri corporation…I can’t explain why.”
“Ok, maybe there is”, Rhaynor mumbled,” but now is not the time. We’re about to storm the most important building of the city. Their leaders are hidden there. If we take them out, it’s all over.”
“Fine by me”, Loque sighed, “ let’s do it. Let’s crush these humans.”
Rhaynor smiled.

The rendez-vous point. The Blaidenmaiden had already arrived.
“Shiiiiit Arachne, what’s that you’re wearing?”, said Laque with a surprised voice,” where did you get that?”
“Aaaah heck”, Arachne smiled,” it’s a human skin, I’ve kind off restyled it, you know, a bit of blood here and there, and other stuff…”
“What other stuff,” Laque whispered and frowned. It was if no one else was allowed to hear this.
“Sorry oh fearless leader”, Arachne grinned, “my little secret.”
“Ah well, can’t blame a girl for trying right?”, she laughed.
The Phayder ship arrived.
“Say Visse,”, Jared whispered,” won’t you meet up with Malakai?
“No way, “ she snarled, “the bastard is ignoring me. He hasn’t said a single word to me since we’ve came together at the Orb.. how about that hm?”
“Apparently his job IS more important to him than you are”, said Laque, using a soft, but husky voice.
“I.. I guess so”, Visse whispered.
“Wait, he’s coming out of the ship”, Jared mumbled,” maybe wave at him?”
Malakai jumped out of the Phayder ship. He saw his wife waving at him, he looked at her for two kraylins, and waved back. It was a poor wave.
Then he walked towards the other Phayders and war parties.
Visse bowed her head.
“I .. I’m sorry Laque I…”, Visse whispered. A dark tear rolled out of her eye, along her cheek, on her lip…
“It’s okay sister”, Laque said using a soft voice,” let it out.. let it all out”

“Never forget who you are Visse”, the voice says, “you’re an intelligent bright young woman, and we’re very proud of you. You’re a strong Necris. Make us proud. Never lose faith in yourself. And find the true meaning of dark love. Never settle with anything less, Visse. For it won’t last very long, it’s dark fire will extinguish within the blink of a setting and sleeping moon. We love you Visse, we don’t like seeing you get hurt. Never forget we’re there for you.
You can count on us.

Aryss came out of the Freylon and walked towards the leaders of the clans.
“So, the shield is down, and how many troops were hiding behind it?”, he asked Gudra, the leader of the female/male D-struktas clan.
“Oh not that much,” she whispered, “ maybe 200 or less. They do posses heavy firepower, one of our Razors tried bombing them. But one blast of a powerful cannon incinerated the ship. Furthermore, we believe the humans are using shock rifles.
“Please don’t tell me they use enhanced shock rifles?”, Aryss shouted.
Enhanced shock rifles, or instagib guns. Very dangerous, it would only take one accurate hit to eliminate an enemy. You could also lose an arm, a leg, .. your head.
“No way”, Gudra laughed,” have you forgotten already? Back in 2305, we’ve robbed the humans from their ESR’s!!
“Oh yeah, sorry”, Aryss grinned.
Gundra rolled her eyes.
“Are you eyeballing me?”, Aryss whispered.
“No no”, Gundra laughed.
Aryss pressed his lips together and frowned. Then he smiled.
“Oh okay, I’ve made a silly mistake, please forgive me yes?”
“Okeydokey smokey”, Gundra smirked.

Malakai joined the group. Loque was standing nearby, so were to other Phayder.
“When are we going to attack this building, my men are getting impatient,” Malakai asked using a firm voice.
“Cool your jet clan leader”, Aryss smiled. “Only 1/10th of a quatron left.”
“Oh okay, but I do need to known one more thing commander”, Malakai continued.
“And what is that?”, Aryss asked.
“Hm what is the name of the building? We still don’t know”, Malakai grinned.
“Well, it’s known as the Capital building of this technocity, but we have reasons to believe it’s owned by the Liandri corporation. That’ll be all. Now go back to your clan and await my orders.”

Malakai returned to his men.
“Well Loque, guess what?”, he said, whilst checking his gun.
“What?”, loque asked and stared at Malakai.
“The building we’re about to attack, is the property of the Liandri corporation.”
Malakai didn’t look up. He was too busy checking the damn gun, or that’s what he likes to call it.
Loque was smiling.
 

_Zd_Phoenix_

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Wow, i was riveted at the end that was a really good piece! The liandri twist was great! I didn't get why Loque was smiling though, I thought he'd be horrified.

I really cannot wait to see the next bit, and I mean really. I want the necris to be overwhelmed and have to retreat back with everyone dieing in a dark twist. But that's just me. Cant wait to see what's gonna happen :)
 

NeoNite

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ok that was quick :)!!!
Well you'll just have to wait and see zd_phoenix :D
This took me one hour to write down.
And yes, to be honest, I like it :)
The previous parts weren't the same as this one...:hmm:
 

Zenda

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W00t..... Right ..... I'm off to the kitchen to put on a cup of tea, Hey, I've got some chocolate chip cake. Yes ... I'll have a slice of that. put it on the tray, bring it over to the computer, sit back and enjoy this next part.

{(nb ... this is a literal description of what I'm going to do. I've been looking forward to this next part. So I'm having a quiet celebration as I read it :) )}
 

NeoNite

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Dec 10, 2000
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Almost forget to tell you phoenix, i've read a part of the tournament story thread, a part written by you.. Not bad!
:)
The part were Creator is walking through a dark hall (?) with slime etc.. well it's good stuff. However this story is big.. I still need do to a lot of catching up. :)
(reading that is, I know you're writing it now :D)
 

Zenda

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What can I say?

I think you've surpassed yourself. :)

The content is getting more complex, but the style is getting more clear. Each paragraph has its own personality and feel to it. I was noticing this as the Would-be violator of the Blademaiden was about to be severely and terminally punished ... and then the scene AND the writing mood changed to Loque-pique and the pumping of the curiosity about Lliandri. As Phoenix says, it's a great twist.

(btw, he's just posted another piece of his UT Story)


I was blown away by that Sudden and relentless updating of Earth's History ... that was sure some ride:D

That 'fishook' bladegun is a winner.


Yeah:) :) ... This has been well worth waiting for. You were saying it took you an hour [!!!!! - to me an hour to do this is a very short time!]

Anyway, Thx and cya:)
 
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