The necris story

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Synastren

Explodious!
Jun 22, 2001
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Don't worry, Neo.
You've got at least 2/7 rootin for ya...
And one of the 2 with uber-1337 bitching skillz. Literally.
I'll especially vote for you if you post in my sotry's thread... ;)
 

Peavey

Rattus Norvegicus
Jul 17, 2001
2,935
1
38
Synastren, i'll read your story, all i need to know is if its.. well you know.. What parents would call "Appropriate" because the other day i was searching for a Ramones site and well.. it was instead a site full of dirty pictures that a 12-year old doesnt need to see.. to put it another way, i just dont want to take any chances, so thats why im asking you first. :redeemer:
 

Peavey

Rattus Norvegicus
Jul 17, 2001
2,935
1
38
Hey I was bored so i made this up... okay you know those Geiko(?I think?) Insurance commercials? well i got one... here goes......................---"We all do STUPID things.... :redeemer: paying too much for car insurance doesnt have to be one of them. :stupid:
 

NeoNite

Starsstream
Dec 10, 2000
20,275
263
83
In a stream of stars
Et Voila!

Here's a NEW PART, yes you're reading right, A NEW PART to the Nali skins story.. :)
Hope you enjoy reading it.



Part 7: So the quest begins…
************************

Meanwhile, in the Skaarj hellhole…

“Are you ok, Gruba”, George asked him, somewhat concerned about his mate.
Gruba was staring down his second glass of red rum, his forefinger tasting the liquid.
“Hm? Oh yes, don’t worry about me George”, Gruba smiled.
“I was ehm.. zoning out a bit.. thinking about things. It’s true you know, you really can’t turn your back on anyone!”
“Always be prepared”, George said while scanning the bar.
Gruba emptied his drink and burped.
“Damn right friend. You know, I have been thinking about this one clan fellow …Fagrao.. I should keep an eye on him. Don’t know why.”
George poked his nose.
“Nasty habit you got there friend”, Gubra whispered.
Immediately George yanked his finger out of his sticky, smelly nose.
“I know, I should probably get some counsel…”
“What about those Necris you were taking on this fantastic tour.. through ..Bouvaja and Nalina? Where are they now?”
George looked a bit surprised. He had almost completely forgotten about them. The Skaarj hellholes still had a great influence on that poor guy.
“Probably in one of the dark nightclubs, but we promised to meet each other at red moon, on the seven Krystalz square.”
“Well, it’s a green moon already…”
“Good thing that techno shield is transparent now, otherwise..”, George smirked.
Gruba nodded. “Sure right friend! Want another red rum?”
“Bring ‘em on!”

“This is great news! The best of news I’ve heard in years! I still can’t believe it! And these 2 Necris and one Acron are going to do the job for us?”, the old man laughed.
Visse squinted her eyes.
“Excuse me”, she said with a bizarre smile on her face, but we still don’t know your name?”
The old man leaned against the wall and studied Visse and the others.
“My name, young blaidenmaiden, is Ygian. I’m part of a … lost world. Yes, that’s what you could call it. A lost world. Once, this world was free of sky demons, the Skaarj. That’s what we used to call them.”
“Sky demons?”, Neoknight grinned, “very interesting.”
Of course Neo was putting all of this down in his notepad.
The old Nali appeared to be irritated and slammed his hand against the wall. One second later, he wish he hadn’t, screamed and started swearing.
“Now look, SON”, Ygian said with a grim voice,” I’d really appreciate it if you would show some respect towards the old Nali generation?”
Neo blushed.
“Ok, I’m sorry”
Rumiko was looking at him, nodding her head.
“You writer types are like so .. weird!”

“May I continue?”, Ygian spoke.
“Sure, go ahead old man”, Visse answered him.
Ygian muttered something and continued.
“One day, the Skaarj came to our planet. They destroyed most of our villages, we still don’t know why. Those sadistic bastards. Anyway, it became worse when they stole our sacred skins from the temple of Shalan.
Those skins belonged to high priests..”
“Yes, Agouba told me. And the Skaarj have hidden those skins in the valley of the dormant dragons.”
“But you do understand that, we the old generation.. we want them back! In honour of the old priests, the old faith. I know most of the younger Nalis don’t give a damn.”
“I give a damn”, Agouba muttered.
“Of course you do Oguba”, Ygian smiled and patted him on the head.
“For the love of, it’s … ah forget it!”, Agouba yelled.
“Ehm, say”, said Neo,” but when are you going to invite us in to your eh home?”
“Oh ho ho ho why indeed”, the old man laughed, his belly shaking up and down, almost dancing,” I’m so sorry, but in all the excitement of hearing this great news.. come in come in!”
Neo looked at Rumiko.
“Do you like where this is going?”
“What?”
Neo looked at her and sighed.
“Nevermind.”
“What? Hey come back here, you you .. writer person!”

Meanwhile, George had left the Skaarj hellhole, said goodbye to his old friend Gruba and was standing in the middle of the street.
Surely there was nothing dangerous in doing this. The only traffic was right above their heads, hovering small ships, Necris aerocats, Skaarj Rippers etc…
“Hm, the moon is shifting it’s colour a bit, it’s turning into a slight red. Is that red? It could be red.”
George looked at the thick crowd of nocturnal creatures and sighed. And sighed again.
“Bouvaja sure looks cool at nitetime”, he smiled.
All of the sudden, George his eyes glanced. An idea had hit him.
“Hey, what if I’d surprise my 3 companions? I could easily hide in the crowd and watch them when they arrive at the 7 krystalz square. They’ll probably be confused, and then I jump out of the crowd, scaring the living daylights out of them! Crappy movie…”
George had a big grin on his face as he walked towards the square.

“Here’s a map”, the old man whispered. He sat down in his chair, and relaxed.
“A map, and what kind of map exactly?”, Visse asked him, apparently confused.
“Oh I’m sorry, guess I’m more tired than I thought. This map could lead to the Valley of the dormant dragons.
But we’re not sure.”
Visse frowned.
“Well that’s great. You have a map that might lead to this valley.. it might, you’re not sure. Great! Fantastic!”
The old man shook his head to the left and right.
“What do you mean by no-no?”, Visse groaned.
“Eh? No no, this is merely an exercise, I got a stiff neck you see, oh my old and withered bo..”
“C’mon old man, give us some more information”, Rumiko all of the sudden yelled, “from what I’ve heard we’re supposed to go on this adventure right? Now, I’m not EXACTLY the adventurer type, but this.. this is very silly. A map, and you’re not sure it’s correct. You nails.. incredible.”
She opened her mouth and slapped her head against her left cheek.

Agouba looked at Ygian at smirked.
“She’s right you know, it is very silly… and very stupid. An incorrect map.”
The old man was becoming irritated again, and wanted to jump out of his chair and teach that arrogant Acron a lesson.
But he liked his chair, and was far too lazy to get out of it.
“Listen young lady, it’s all we have ok? Now, please, I know it’s not much. But I did hear that Necris are good trackers right?”
Visse stared at the Ygian and slightly nodded.
“So? What if there are a couple of errors in that map? I’m sure you could easily find your way.. look it’s just so important to me, to all the old Nalis, the old ..”
“I know old Nali”, Visse interrupted him, “ but we need something more I’m sorry. I’m not insane. Nalina is not a planet I know by heart.”
Neo looked up from his notepad, turned his eyes to the left, to the right and back to the left. Maybe he was thinking? Maybe he had this really annoying habit..
He was thinking.
“Agouba, won’t you come with us”, Neo smiled.
“Me? Me going on a trip with you guys..”
“Ehem”, Rumiko coughed and stared Agouba in the eyes.
“Eh he, you guy and girls”…
Visse coughed.
“OK OK, you guy, girl and woman.. better now?”
All 3 of them grinned.
“I don’t know you see, I’m only a waiter in a dark.. nightclub and..”
Agouba scratched his head. The other 3 arms seemed lost.
“To Demoncrater with it, I’m going with you. I know my way around Nalina. Well, I .. know parts of this planet.”
Visse walked up to him and pulled his cheek.
“Parts?”
“Most parts..but the valley of the dormant dragons lies in the forbidden area.”
“Forbidden area?”, Visse whispered.
“Yes”, Ygian continued, “no Nali may enter the forbidden area you see. If a Skaarj sees one of us in there, we’re .. history.”
“And still YOU, agouba, want to come with us”, Neo said. He seemed to admire the courage of the young Nali.
“I got nothing special to live for … you know?”
“How do we get to this forbidden area? How do we cross .. is there a border? A Skaarj outpost?, Visse asked Ygian.
Ygian sank deeper into his lazy chair, but Visse yanked him out of it.
“Hey take take it easy on an old man you crazy Necris!”, he yelled.
“I just want you to stay alert her, Ygian”, Visse smiled. Again, that bizarre smile. Ygian didn’t like it.
Visse continued:
“Well? How do we travel to the forbidden area? And once there, how do we continue our journey?”
“Agouba can fly a Phynx, one of the fastest small cargo vessels on Nalina. Most of the times Skaarj won’t stop you for a routine control. You can set the ship down near the forbidden area. Indeed, there’s a Skaarj outpost there. The best chance you have, is sneaking past it when it’s night time, when there are 2 azure moons at the sky.
Agouba will fill you in on the details, I’m sure. We’ve been “planning” all of this, and now that the time has come.. we’re very nervous you have to understand?”
Visse did and looked at her travelling companions.
“You heard the old Nali. What do you think? Care to join me on this wild adventure? Feel like some pure excitement? This might spice up our trip a bit!”
“Sure I’m in”, Neo said while putting the notepad back in his backpak.
“I guess .. it’s ok. I’m in”, Rumiko sighed.
“But what about George?”
Visse squinted her eyes.
“We have to get rid of him. When we’ll meet him at the 7 krystalZ square, we’ll tell him our interest in this planet is over, thank him for his services and .. “
Visse smiled.
“It’s a plan”, Neo shouted.
“Okeydokey smokey”, Rumiko said with a high pitched voice. She really wasn’t that excited. But she had always fancied the word excitement.
“Mouvaga”, Agouba grinned.
“Yeah back at you pal”, Neo smirked.

The 4 of them left the “home” of Ygian, he waved at them when they disappeared into the dark passage…
“I sure hope they succeed. The last group ran out of luck when they reached the outpost.. idiots. I have a good feeling about those Necris.. and that Acron.”
He went back inside and fell down in his lazy chair and smiled. It was a bizarre smile.

Arriving at the Square, Visse looked up at the sky. She looked at the red moon and nodded.
“Well, this is where we were supposed to meet George, at a red moon”, Rumiko said with that typical snobbish tone in her voice.
“Oh wait a couple of trinitons will ya?”, Visse snarled.
Rumiko raised her chin and sat down near the fountain.
“Show me that map again”, Visse said to Neo,” George probably won’t arrive for a couple of dozens trinitons.”
Neo grabbed the map out of his pocket, and gave it to Visse.
“You’re very excited about this, aren’t you?”
“Damn right I am”, Visse said, smiling, showing all her white teeth, “I’m a blaidenmaiden, Neo, I need adventure, action.”
“Just be sure if you see George you..”
But Visse couldn’t finish her sentence, George jumped out of the crowd, with a silly grin on his face and before she knew it, he had gotten hold of the map.
“Is this a drawing you made Visse? Maybe one of me?”, he smiled.
“NO don’t!”,Visse shouted!
The smile on George his face disappeared when he looked at the “drawing”.
 

NeoNite

Starsstream
Dec 10, 2000
20,275
263
83
In a stream of stars
300 posts... whew... :eek:
10 pages..
You know, when I started this thing on the 6th of july, I never expected it to grow THIS large.. and all the feedback..
Man, I thought it nobody'd be interested... :hmm:
Guess I was wrong :)
 

Synastren

Explodious!
Jun 22, 2001
2,417
0
0
37
KU
Great part, Neo...
Very good... :D
I like it... obviously.
About that PM, I may put it up in a Zip, but it'd be tomorrow evening or the day after... I have no problems with the c/p.
The reason for tomorrow or the day after, is because the next one's in the process...
On the notebook, as I'm typing.
:D
 

_Zd_Phoenix_

Queen of BuFdom
May 1, 2001
5,870
0
36
41
Over the street. With binoculars.
Visit site
” George probably won’t arrive for a couple of dozens trinitons.”

naming time after a TV. I like it ;)

This story is definately getting better now it has a focus, although i'm really glad you didn't rush the start now, as you've got some great characterisation in there. I like this story alot better than the original, because although the first one had some absolutely brilliant plot ideas in it, this one seems to 'flow' more.

I like the way you can use little description and yet still paint a crystal clear picture of what things are like. I think that happens mainly through the conversations the characters have, which is a clever way of doing it.

Hell, I even like Visse now! :D
 

NeoNite

Starsstream
Dec 10, 2000
20,275
263
83
In a stream of stars
I don't mind C/p neither synastren, but unfortunately it takes precious time on 56K and especially in my case, I need to plan my time online now.. :hmm:
So it'd appreciate it :)

Tnx phoenix if I had a scanner (hehe here I go again) I'd probably scan in some drawings of Visse, Neo, Rumiko and George and their surroundings, small sketches... :-S

Say, how do you join ca as an author? :) :) :)
 

Peavey

Rattus Norvegicus
Jul 17, 2001
2,935
1
38
hehe yeah, sorry bout the redeemer smilies :) ..... well i ran out of comments so i really dont know what to say :) well bye for now and 1 more thing- :redee.. oops.. hehe nevermind :D
 

NeoNite

Starsstream
Dec 10, 2000
20,275
263
83
In a stream of stars
Here's part 8 of the Naliskins story. Enjoy :)

Part 8: Journey to the forbidden grounds…
*************************************

Bouvaja. Night time. Crowded streets. Seven Krystalz square. Trouble.
Two Necris, One Acron , One Nali and .. a Skaarj. A Skaarj who has seen something he shouldn’t have…

“George, we can explain this”, Visse said looking him in the eyes. Her right hand was moving towards the evisceration knife. Ready for everything.
George was holding the map in his hands. The map that shows a path which probably leads to the forbidden area on Nalina.
“I don’t know what to say”, he said, with a calm voice. Visse quickly looked at Neoknight, who was moving his hand towards his minigun. A small type of minigun that is. A portable.
“Where did you get this?”
No one said a word.
“Where.. did you get this”, George repeated, this time a little irritated, almost scared,” do you idiots even know what this is?”
“Yah we do George”, Rumiko said and took out her handgun. She pointed it at his head.
All around them there was nothing but noise, the constant mumbling of the crowd, the hovering cars all over, the music. But they didn’t hear it.
George froze. He was staring down the barrel of a small handgun, and at the woman holding it.
“Miss Rumiko, please put down that gun”, he said, again with a calm voice.
“I thought I told you never to call me Miss again, George”, Rumiko growled.
Visse had to do something, this was getting out of hand. Someone was going to get hurt. There had to be another way. Just this once. She liked George. He was a silly Skaarj, not one of those brutal, moronic types.

“Wait a kraylin”, she yelled, “now everybody calm down. Rumiko, put down the gun.”
Rumiko hesitated and glanced at Visse, George.
“Put the handgun down Rumiko, the situation is under control. No way George is a match for the three of us.”
George knew she was right. Although he had an impressive build, he was a Skaarj after all, he was no fighter. Not a real fighter.
Rumiko lowered her arm and gently put the gun back in its holster.
Visse smiled. “Better, right?”
“Now to answer your question George.. I can’t tell you. And whether you like it or not, we’re going. Ain’t no way you’re going to stop us.”
George had a worried look on his face and shook his head.
“Wait you don’t understand Visse. Please, listen to me, all of you! See, I’m not opposed to what you’re about to do. I don’t mind if you want to take on this quest, and bring back those sacred Nali skins. I for one, as a Skaarj, feel like they should be returned. There are others who feel like this, but we’re a minority. If it was up to me, I’d join your group. But .. trying to sneak beyond the outpost, that’s insane. It’s suicide!”
Neo had to ask.
“What do you mean by saying suicide? It’s an outpost.. how many guards are there?”
“Dozens of them, maybe up to 90 Skaarj warriors. Very good Skaarj warriors. Trained, heavily equipped with the finest weapons. See, we… they really don’t want anyone to pass their outpost.”
“The Skaarj at outpost 3j were beaten by one human once”, Visse whispered.
“Yes, but that’s different, outpost 3j was small. Nothing much really. This outpost however, called Aragon, is bad. Believe me, even a group of trained Blaidenmaiden or Phayders couldn’t make it through.”
Visse took a deep breath and walked up to the fountain.
“90 Skaarj warriors, you said?”
“Yes, maybe more, maybe up to 100.”
“We need help”, she said with a firm voice, “good help. I’m going to make a call.”

Necron. Gravicrun.
Laque was having dinner. She only got home 15 kraylins ago from a wild hunting party. She was enjoying her meal as all of the sudden the console rang.
“Oh please no, I’m having dinner here”, she sighed and opened the com channel.
Immediately her mood changed from a grey thundercloud to a sparkling nocturnal open Necron sky.
“Well, hey Visse, how are you there on Nalina?”
“Eh, not bad Laque, but I’m afraid I have to ask you something. Would you mind coming to Nalina, together with Jared and Loque?”
“Ehm.. sure Visse, but why?”
“No time to explain, leader”, Visse sighed, “I’d really appreciate it. We’re going on an adventure, and we need extra “hands”.. you know what I mean.”
“Sho thing honey”, Laque smiled, “but Jared and Loque can’t come. Loque is on an away mission with the other Phayders, and Jared is.. I don’t know how to put this..”

Neo took out his notepad and added some lines. “This is all so very exciting,” he thought to himself “, so different from my boring life on Necron.”
Visse closed the com channel and walked up to the others.
“Ok, help is on the way. Laque, my clan leader is coming to Nalina, and Barak will be joining her. I asked for Jared, but… she fell of a ladder and broke her left leg.”
Rumiko giggled. “Of all the, a Necris blaidenmaiden falling of a ladder.. hehehe!”
“That’s enough”, Visse hissed, “Ok they’ll arrive in Bouvaja within 2 Nali hours.”
“Barak and Laque”, Neo muttered,” not bad, but not much right?”
“These are fine Necris warriors, Neo”, Visse said while taking out her evisceration knife.
“Hey wait Visse I didn’t mean to…!”, Neo cried.
“Hm what? Oh you silly man, I’m only cleaning my knife here!”, Visse said with a big, crazy grin on her pale face.
“What about Loque?”, he asked her, still feeling his heart heavily pounding in his chest.
“Loque couldn’t come”, Visse answered him with a quiet voice and cleaned the dangerous knife.
“It already looks pretty clean to me Visse”
“I know Neo, but … there were a couple of stains on them and I want my knife to be shiny and clean.”
“Maybe pretty soon you’re knife’s color will change to green?”
Visse glanced at Neo, nodding, cleaning the knife and finally putting it back in its “holster”.

Time passed and passed…

“Oh what the heh”, George mumbled all of the sudden,” guys, mind if I join the group? Those Nali skins really need to be returned.”
“That’s great”, Agouba smiled,” a Skaarj joining our group. A cool Skaarj!”
The others stared at him.
“What?”
“You’ve been awfully quiet, Agouba”
“I guess I’m a shy guy.. nali.. heh”.
Visse frowned and rolled her eyes.
“Nalis”, she sighed.
“Ok George, we need all the help we can get, but do you know how to handle a gun, any weapon?”
George appeared to be insulted.
“Hey sure, give me a ripper anyday and I’ll .. rip some heads off, if necessary. I may be not one of the best, but I’m … ok. I can handle plenty of weapons.”
“Good”, Visse smiled and patted him on the shoulder.
“What ship are the others using to get here?”, Neo asked Visse looking at the sky.
“A Freylinn”, she answered him, “why?”
“Oh, there’s one landing over there.”
“Already? That’s fast!!!”

A Freylinn had set down on the Square.
Laque got out of the ship, followed by Barak. They walked up to the others. The crowd was screaming and yelling. No ships were to land on the Square!
But Laque couldn’t care less.
“Hello Visse, Neo, Rumiko and eh the others, please hurry and get your asses in the ship. Now! We don’t have much time left!”
As quickly as they could, they ran up to the Freylinn, the crowd getting closer.
Finally Agouba got in, and the door closed. The Freylinn took of and roared over the multicoloured crowd, up to the shield.
“There, a gate”, Laque said,” I’ll pilot the ship through it, and set course for this forbidden area. Anyone got this map please, the map Visse mentioned over the com channel?”
“Here you go”, Neo whispered, and took a look out the Freylinn. He enjoyed a cool view of the city lying underneath, the beautiful colored lights, the niteflife, the thousands of creatures swarming through the streets, the huge buildings, the many cool shapes…
As they flew through the shieldgate they could admire a beautiful red-turquoise-yellow Nali sky, with a red moon, a green planet on the horizon and dozens of small dragons flying trough the air.
“This is all so unreal”, Neo whispered.
“You betcha”, Visse said to him, while rubbing his hair.
“Hey, don’t do that, you’re messing it up”
Visse grinned.

“Excuse me”, Agouba said with a high pitched voice to Visse, “but why aren’t we using my ship as ..”
“Because the Freylinn is probably way faster, and tell me Nali, can your ship cloak itself?”
Agouba shook his head.
“So there.”

The Freylinn swiftly crossed the Amaga mountain pass, the River of the stormgods and finally arrived near the forbidden area.
“Preparing to enter cloak mode”, Laque yelled while pressing lots and lots of buttons on the control board.
“The cloak mode will probably fool them until you’re up to 50 Magrans (one magran: 1.2 metres)
from the outpost.
“That’s all we need”, Laque said and winked at him,” have faith in a blaidenmaiden, George.”
“And a Phayder”, Barak stated, “one of the best Phayders mind you.”
George sighed and took a seat.
“Only 1200 magrans left now”, he mumbled, “just.. just be careful .. don’t underestimate the firepower they have.”
Laque showed a confident, wide smile and the ship went into cloak mode.
At 55 magrans from the outpost, the Freylinn sat down. It didn’t make one sound.
Not even the surrounding Nali rabbits were alarmed.

“Ok, the ship is safe here”, Laque said with a hoarse voice,” I’ve sat her down behind a big rock, out of sight.”
For a couple of trinitons the ship went out of cloak mode, and the “crew” got out.
Then it went back into cloak mode.
“How will we remember the exact location of the ship?”, George asked Visse.
“We Necris can “see” our cloaked ships George, how about that?”
George didn’t understand at first, but slowly.. he started smiling.
“Cool.”

The seven of them took place behind a smaller formation of rocks and observed the outpost. Like George had said, it was guarded by many, many Skaarj warriors.
“Ok, this is it”, Visse whispered,” Now all we need, is a way trough..”
“Leave it to me”, Barak grinned.
 

NeoNite

Starsstream
Dec 10, 2000
20,275
263
83
In a stream of stars
One small announcement:
TOmorrow is my last day on puf, meaning:
I WILL return to puf don't worry, but I'll have to wait for the new pc to get online.. should take maybe one week, or maybe two weeks.. they said september 2001.
SO i'll probably be posting part 9 tomorrow :)
 
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