1. This site uses cookies. By continuing to use this site, you are agreeing to our use of cookies. Learn More.
  2. Two Factor Authentication is now available on BeyondUnreal Forums. To configure it, visit your Profile and look for the "Two Step Verification" option on the left side. We can send codes via email (may be slower) or you can set up any TOTP Authenticator app on your phone (Authy, Google Authenticator, etc) to deliver codes. It is highly recommended that you configure this to keep your account safe.

Ask me about being Jesus.

Discussion in 'Off Topic' started by Cap'n Beeb, Apr 16, 2006.

Thread Status:
Not open for further replies.
  1. Enfyrneaux

    Enfyrneaux New Member

    Joined:
    Apr 4, 2002
    Messages:
    1,271
    Likes Received:
    0
    This is the great Internet; we hold ourselves to higher double standards!
     
  2. SubSanity

    SubSanity //- urban Brutality

    Joined:
    Mar 8, 2003
    Messages:
    24
    Likes Received:
    0
    The capital of Singapore is Singapore
     
  3. AriTheDog

    AriTheDog frog steering expert

    Joined:
    May 6, 2001
    Messages:
    4,695
    Likes Received:
    0
    No, it's the Ten Floors of Whores.
     
  4. Kaligraphic

    Kaligraphic Charles leChaud is my hero

    Joined:
    Oct 22, 2002
    Messages:
    2,504
    Likes Received:
    0
    Jesus, is it true that after they tried to crucify you, you hunted down the ringleader, put him in a dress, and nailed him to a tree with a sign identifying him as the "Queen of the Jews"?
     
  5. John O'h Diggin

    John O'h Diggin Abstract Chains

    Joined:
    Apr 5, 2006
    Messages:
    140
    Likes Received:
    0
    Jesus is it true that you were actually on one of those pirates trips set to steal everyones rum?
     
  6. Enfyrneaux

    Enfyrneaux New Member

    Joined:
    Apr 4, 2002
    Messages:
    1,271
    Likes Received:
    0
    We all know the Pimp of Singapore really lives in the basement.
     
  7. Cap'n Beeb

    Cap'n Beeb Banned

    Joined:
    Nov 27, 1999
    Messages:
    8,106
    Likes Received:
    0
    I kidnapped him, drove out to the Mojave, and staked him to the ground facing east. It gets mighty hot mighty quick as the sun comes up out there. :eek:

    I am at not liberty to divulge any information one way or the other.
     
  8. ilkman

    ilkman The Outcast God

    Joined:
    Mar 1, 2001
    Messages:
    3,556
    Likes Received:
    0
    Jesus, how can you be three different entities at the same time, the father, son, and holy spirit, and yet still be a single entity?
     
  9. Cap'n Beeb

    Cap'n Beeb Banned

    Joined:
    Nov 27, 1999
    Messages:
    8,106
    Likes Received:
    0
    I wonder that too. I think that's another thing people have gotten horribly wrong over the years.
     
  10. Continuum

    Continuum Lobotomistician

    Joined:
    Jul 24, 2005
    Messages:
    1,305
    Likes Received:
    0
    class God extends xPawn
    class Jesus extends God
     
  11. AizenSA

    AizenSA The Divine Tyrant

    Joined:
    Dec 8, 2005
    Messages:
    838
    Likes Received:
    0
    whats up jesus, whats hell look like? And how big is satan.
     
  12. AriTheDog

    AriTheDog frog steering expert

    Joined:
    May 6, 2001
    Messages:
    4,695
    Likes Received:
    0
    This is a falsity, the basement contains a horrible food court that is one of the least sanitary places in all of Singapore!
     
  13. Cap'n Beeb

    Cap'n Beeb Banned

    Joined:
    Nov 27, 1999
    Messages:
    8,106
    Likes Received:
    0
    Hell looks like New Jersey. In fact, it is New Jersey. Satan is 5'6, and 140lbs.
     
  14. empty_other

    empty_other New Member

    Joined:
    Oct 19, 2004
    Messages:
    62
    Likes Received:
    0
    Met is mead? Ql. But i prefer to call it Mjød!

    Anyway, Jesus: Whats up with God and his book, the Bible? Is it mostly him who wrote the old testament? Are he gonna write another sequel? And does he get paid for all those new bible movies?

    And which country is your favorite country in the world?
     
  15. Enfyrneaux

    Enfyrneaux New Member

    Joined:
    Apr 4, 2002
    Messages:
    1,271
    Likes Received:
    0
    Hence the perfect hideout for the Pimp. When the Fuzz of Singapore come to get the pimp they would never suspect it, and get bored after looking for a while.

    Back to whipping ten year olds who mouth off to their grandmothers!
     
  16. Judas

    Judas I like Jesus

    Joined:
    Apr 21, 2006
    Messages:
    1
    Likes Received:
    0
    Dear Jesus, may i give you a small kiss?
     
  17. Shroom-FX

    Shroom-FX Basshead

    Joined:
    Jul 2, 2005
    Messages:
    343
    Likes Received:
    0
    your moms a virgin

    is this coz she is fat
     
    Last edited: Apr 21, 2006
  18. DaBeatard

    DaBeatard Mr.How

    Joined:
    Nov 20, 2002
    Messages:
    1,264
    Likes Received:
    0
    Dear Jesus, do monkeys have souls?
     
    Last edited: Apr 21, 2006
  19. Cap'n Beeb

    Cap'n Beeb Banned

    Joined:
    Nov 27, 1999
    Messages:
    8,106
    Likes Received:
    0
    The Bible was written, and edited numerous times, by a bunch of old farts who wanted to play at ruling the world.

    I don't have a favorite country, they all over their own perks. :)

    Sure, buy me dinner first, though.
     
  20. Kaligraphic

    Kaligraphic Charles leChaud is my hero

    Joined:
    Oct 22, 2002
    Messages:
    2,504
    Likes Received:
    0
    Dear Jesus, where does the Pope get his weed, and can you hook me up?
     
Thread Status:
Not open for further replies.

Share This Page