the story of the starship 'uss eternaty'

[Vortex]

commander's log don't know, can't see a thing

Damn it, that hunter is smarter than I thought. I nearly had him fried in the warp core when he leapt out and paralysed us with some kind of all powerful attack. Whatever, it was, I must try and teach it to my Gengar. Still, I now stumble blindy in the general direction of the holodeck where the holographic doctor is residing. hopefully he can restore my vision back to normal. Hold on, I just heard something. A lot of security guards just ran past me. And a giant pizza. Hmm, interesting. Does nothing normal ever happen on this ship?

 

[RizMan]

RizMan's Log, stardate 49876.6

Security arrived to track the pizza pokemon. At least I think they went for that. They ran past me w/o noticing me. So I'm gonna left the work to them and headed for the bridge. It actually was the first time I entered the bridge today. Something with this ship is quite weird: there's nobody on the bridge. perhpas they're all looking for the wavy air guy and the Pizza Pokemon.
Anyway, First thing I did was getting familiar with the helmconsole. Wow, this baby can go up to warp 9.9. Max speed of the Arabelle was warp 7.15 That rocks.
I'm looking forward to reach Casperia Prime. I'd like to increase speed to get there earlier, but unfortunately, the captains not here, so I can't do that. Gotta wait for his orders.
At actual speed, we're gonna reach Casperia in 2 days.

End Log

 

[8-4-7-2]

TO's log Supplemental

I heard that Ensign RizMan wants to increase our speed. I quickly rushed up to the bridge tpo prevent the worst. No ship in universe can fly warp 10. That's the infinite speed or the Threshold. If could overcome it we would probably turn into salamander like creatures as our evolution will accelerate (Note: see Voyager: The Threshold). I also regret that we can uphold warp 9.9 no longer than 18 hours as we must conduct all auxililary and emergency energy to the warp drive and the structural integrity alrady suffers from this speed.
I think the Ensign had good intention, but just dosn't know how dangerous such high speeds are!

I'm glad to hear that to mutant pizza is currently chased and that we'll reach Casperia Prime in 2 or 3 days. I heard that the Captain said will stay for over 2 weeks there. Man, we will have a great time on this planet.

 

[Sam_The_Man]

Communication Officer's Log Supplemental, Stardate 666

I was on my way to the airlock when I lost conciousness. When I woke up I found that I had been under a trance, and that my actions were out of control. Rather than following my plan I seemed to be being manipulated by others through their logs. From the other crewmen's logs I have discovered it appears I took paint outside, as opposed to my plan, and have been eaten by a Pokemon, also as opposed to my plan. This might explain why I seem to be in a very cramped, dark space. I still have an energy cutting torch from what I actually planned to do out in space, so I will use it to attempt to cut my way out of the Pokemon's stomach. However it seems to be using its 'Harden' attack, by using stale, hard pizza crusts to shield it's stomach walls, so it shall take a while. All I have to survive on is a Gameboy with the new Pokemon game, 'Pokemon Curious Shade Of Pinky-Russet, Tinged with Flecks Of Mauve And With Vomit-Coloured Stripes', and digested pizza, while the torch cuts through the stomach. I do not know whether I can survive without Unreal Tournament for that long.

 

[Goughmezz]

?!?!?!?!

Someone needs to lock this MF'er. :O

 

[CaSCaDe]

Captains log star date the second star to the right and strait on till morning.

i have been informed that we wioll arive on the fun planet in about 1 or 2 days! i cant wait to get there.

all problems r bgeing delth with so i can relax on the holodeck.
i have visited the dopefish as i have promised and we had a great time hunting down pokemoon on his pokemon hnting program!

i know that my crew will do fine when i'm absent.

i have been informed that my ce has resigned from this ship, i regret this desicion but i respectn it.

i have agreed to give ensine TA the rank of luitenant, junior grade. al;so i have given him the possition as ships engineer.
he seem very happy with his apointment.

as for ensine Rizman i have desided that he weill be a great helmsman and i think i will promote him to luitanat junior grade to.
i will need to cunsult this with my commander and and to, but i think it will be fine.

as for the violent pizza pokemon i think that i will order the crew to leave the pokemon at a deserted planet sov that the traitor sam the man (may he still be alive in the stumage of the creature) will not be able to betrai this ship again!

CaSCaDe out

suplemental:

i am happy to report we did not recieve any word from thee q like being yellow 5.
it would be desatres if he would be able to get onboard this ship and release his power.

CaSCaDe out

 

[8-4-7-2]

Tactical Officer's log Stardate 50152.2

This stupid Sam_The_Man must be the most annoying person I've ever met. This kid thinks he's Communications Officer. I told him about the chain of command and he still doesn't get it.Nonone ever gave him this rank! He's nothing. TA was our Com Officer. I agree with the Captain that we leave him one some godforsaken ball of rock and ice where he will die a cruel death.

I'm glad to hear that Captain Cascade followed my suggestion to promote Ensign TA and make him Chief Engineer. I think we don't yet need a Communications Officer, but if we get new people, they can have this position.

The Captain also wants to promote Ensign RizMan to Lieutenant Junior Grade. He's a fine hemlsman and flys the ship very well, although he sometimes drives to fast!

I must still talk to the Captain about our missing Science Officer Lt: Cmd. Skumboy. I fear he was severly injured or even killed during the pokemon troubles!

 

[OshadowO]

Medical Officers Log
Satrdate Year of the yellow one nippled monkey
Not much to report. My ancient enemy MoyDoy has resigned and apperently left the ship mysteriously. One would think he would have waited till we got to casperia prime but nooo.
I have lately found myself in a midlife crisis. I keep substituting the star date for shaman like years. I also keep using wierd shaman terms instead of modern day medical terms. I don't know whats wrong with me. Maybe schitzophrenia. Hopefully this trip to casperia prime will cure me. May the gods of the red coloured clay like earth that is not really clay be with us.*ack* I did it again!!

 

[Vortex]

commander's log 54874548597.9

Well, the doctor managed to restore my sight, but I think it will now be safer if I decide not to chase this hunter any more. Perhaps he will jump ship when we reach Casperia Prime. I heard from security that they were able to kill one of the mutant pizza pokemon but an other pizza appeared and evolved into a huge loaf of mouldy bread before they could act. Half of the security team were dissolved by a powerful spray of mould that came from the pokemon while the rest escaped thankfully. The bread is now making it's way to the bridge. It must be stopped before it calls for an army of breadloafes (sp?) to wipe us out.

end log.

 

[RizMan]

Ensign RizMan's Log, stardate 56978

This morning, we entered orbit of Casperia Prime. I just informed the captain about that. I hope he'll give us permission to beam down soon. We will probably stay there for 2 weeks to recover from all the events which happened during the last few days.
The commander made me understand that I'm not to increase speed w/o permission cause this piece of chunk has still lots of structural integrity problems. I will follow this order, but it could have been funny to push this baby. I heard that the capt. want to promote me to Lt. Junior Grade. That would be great. It's an honor to serve onthis fine ship with this fine crew.

I was told that the pokemon monster is heading for the bridge. I hope security will catch it before it arrives there, because I don't want to be eaten.

End Log

 

[8-4-7-2]

Tactaical Officer's log: The year of the yellow one nippled monkey, on the day of the blue turtle, in the hour of the wolf

What the heck did I just say? I had a terrible night. This morning I caught me doing some ancient shaman ghost raising ritual. When I woke out of my trance I found my old pet I had as child sitting opposite to me: a green spoted Tellurian monkey. But he died 20 years ago! Then he suddenly flew through the wall and disappeared. I fear he's now moving free on the ship. I alarmed security about this.
As I said this shaman stardate, I wonder if our Doctor has injected something into the air ventilation system. I heard somone say that he's on a shaman trip, and that he has a lot of unmarked containers in sickbay.
Strange things happen on this ship.

Ensign and soon-to-be-Lieutenant RizMan informed me that we our now in a standard orbit over Caspria Prime. So I slipped into my bermuda shorts and a hawaii shirt, and went to the bridge. Ensign RizMan said that he wants to push the Eternaty to is limits. Well, warp 9.5 is the limit. Any other ship would vaporize at lower speeds!

Wait. I can hear the turbo lift. Who can this be? I fear its the pizza bread pokemon! The doors open........NO.........Ensign take your phaser................

[log interrupted]

 

[Vortex]

commander's log k13n8h485h:

Damn it, I couldn't get too sleep either. By the sounds of it, some cult were performing some ritual in the corridor. Then a strange monkey like creature came running through the walls of my quarters and then disappeared through the floor. Things are getting really wierd. So I've decided I'm going to get out of here as soon as possible. So I'm taking a shuttle to Casperia right now. I shall meet the rest of the crew when they arrive there in the morning. Now I just hope I can make my way to the shuttle bay without incident.

 

[Sam_The_Man]

Manual Nurtition Producer Edit Status Operator's log, Stardate Forgot

I seem to be making progress through the pizza pokemon's stomach wall. However it appears I must act fast. From the muffles sounds outside it appears the pizza pokemon is to be left on a deserted planet and me with it, as a punishment for my attempted sabotage and apparently wrongly calling myself Communication's Officer. I am sure I was allowed to choose this position, but to avoid (well... minimize) anger I have changed my title to Manual Nutrition Producer Edit Status Operator, which basically translates as they guy who switches the food replicators on and off, a useless job since they are always on. I hope the captain will accept this title during my seemingly fast running out time on this ship.

As for the attempted sabotage, well... a guys got to have a reason for living hasn't he?

I have turned the energy torch up to full strength. It may have unexpected consequences but I have beaten Pokemon Curious Shade Of Pinky-Russet, Tinged with Flecks Of Mauve And With Vomit-Coloured Stripes a million times only using a Metapod and am getting bored very fast.

 

[RizMan]

Ensign RizMan's Log, I don't know

TO joined me on the bridge shortly after my last log. He wanted to congratulate for my new rank, which I haven't got officially yet, but the captain is thinking about giving me the rank of Lt. Junior Grade.
Suddenly, while we were chatting, the TurboLift opened and a horrible monster came out of it. I can hardly believe I'm still alive. After seeing this thing, I though it would be TO's and my last hour. The monster shoot some sort of green slime towards us which exploded after a few moments. It filled the whole bridge with the slimey thing. We were both standing together in a corner of the bridge, unable to do anything. Phasers were useless against this thing. It didn't eve seem to notice them.
Then, suddenly, the creature started to yell the hell out of it. We heard a sound of some sort of energy torch coming from the inside of it. Shortly after that, the monster's whomb seemed being opened from the inside and a human hand came out of it. The monster fell on the ground, still yelling and shrieking.
Then, it went quiet. We approched it and it seemed that the thing was dead. From the whomb, we heard a muffling Help sound. TO took the hand and pulled someone out of the monster's whomb. It was the long vanished SamTheMan. This traitor had saved our lives. I won't forget that althought he had tried to sabotage the ship. Thank you SamTheMan.

I hope this will be the end of the Pokemon thread.
Anyway, as we have arrived Casperia Prime earlier this morning, we are going to have a great party. I'll head to my quarter, replicate some clothes and then join the others on the planet.

End Log

 

[Temporary Account]

Chief Engineer Lt. Jr. Grade TA's log: Startday 69:OnCasperiaPrime w00t!

Well, Engineering is mostly cleared up, vital systems have been restored, and I've begun work on repairing the non-vital systems that are still non-functional: the Frozen Yogurt Machine on deck 12, Turbolifts 6-16, Holodeck 7 which seems to be stuck in an endless loop of a reinactment of Monty Python and the Holy Grail, and some small glitches in Navigation and Sensors.

But fortunately, these can all wait, as we've arrived on Casperia Prime! It's been far too long since I've seen a woman, and I'm anxious to get down to the surface. The commander has gone ahead to make sure that we have safe lodging. Meanwhile, the rest of the crew seems to be suffering from "shore leave fever." Guess I'd better get packing!

<End of Log>

 

[henke]

cyborg canonballs' log. Stardate: 134A56FF

Maybe someone authorized should decide this

i went up to the bridge in the middle of the night to have a look around and see how things were doing up there (since i was full of pizza and Petrol i needed a walk). So anyhow i looked ant some monitors and the big screen and saw a big red flashing light and about 30 or 40 galaxy destroyers that were about to invade something. And us compared to them we look like a squaking iron with a blender for an engie. They contacted us but since i havent learned Zonitopian language to 100% (i have learned about 35%), the conversation was a big flop and they seemed to get hostile, or they wanted to borrow our rubber duck. i mostly think that they want trouble. But we are just a cargo/battleship and need very much time to get things in order because everyone is sleeping, and the Galaxy destroyers are fully operational and ready for battle...

so someone, preferably the capitan DO SOMETHING

 

[Neo Skinz]

Captains log : Stardate 946827.69

My ship, the USS Panzer Blade, on its way to Casperia Prime has picked up a distress signal from a nearby Federation vesal the USS Eternaty.

It appears that they have run into some trouble with a Zonitopian fleet. We are going to warp 9 and should arrive in at least 20 minutes.

I have hailed the Eternaty to inform them that we are on our way but no reply has been recieved yet. I hope we make it in time.


End log.

 

[Vortex]

Hmm, although I got to the surface of the planet to escape the strange going ons aboard the Eternaty I have not heard from the rest of the crew or seen them beam down. I hope nothing bad has happened, although it wouldn't surprise me. Also, this part of Casperia seems quieter than usual. Maybe they got scared of when I crash landed in the middle of that lake. Although there other things I'd rather be doing, I feel it is my duty to try and establish contact with the captain once again.

Does nothing ever go right for us?

 

[CaSCaDe]

Captains on the fun planet log stardate: i do not care here on the surface

the last few days have been very relaxing for me and the crew (expet for the few people that have staid behind to run the ship)

AAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!!!!
relaxation!

this is the good life!


what?

what is that?

oh wait its my com badge.

DAmn! the ship is hailing me!

what do i hear we r under attack!

\RED ALERT\ RED ALERT\ AL HENS TO BATTLE STATIONS!
FIRE AT WILL!!!!!!!!!
FIRE AT WILL!!!!!!!!!
>.............
>red alert set stardate 53232243,543
>captain log interup
>end of log due to power falure
>
>
>

 

[Thar T'Pak [=AA=]]

Stardate 4987534987345.88

Hunter-Seeker of the Third Triad Thar T'pak reporting.

Hmm. After a boring last few days, I have finished cleaning the little beings from the ship. They seem to be more harmful than anything to my continued hunting. Not to mention that the like to %^&$* anywhere they please, which makes footing, especially in the airducts, difficult at best.


Hmm I hear some sort of siren. I used the ductwork to get up to the bridge. Damn couldn't they have made this damn duct bigger.

Hmm Zonitopians. This is great. Soon they shall be beaming in and taking over the ship with their monotone voice/nerve nullifiers as well as...

Wait..If they do this...%^&*....I can't let them. I shall start combing the ship for signs of the Zonitopians landing parties and dispatching them. Hopefully the crew won;t blow my head off in the process, but i suppose I can always grow a new one.

These munkeys better understand what I am doing for them.


Hunter-Seeker of the Third Triad Thar T'pak out.