the story of the starship 'uss eternaty'

[Thar T'Pak [=AA=]]

Starlog 6745728366398467.2

Hunter-Seeker of the Third Triad Thar T'pak reporting.

These beings are amusing to no end. It seems that they have no direction and seem intent on saving every wounded being from here to the galactic core. I have managed to sneak into the command area again.

Hmm, noone appears to be about or noticing the lift's door opening and closing.

I see they attempted to fix that damn console called "Navigation". Hmm interesting. Here is one called "Life support" and another called "Weapon systems".


heh

I quickly and carefully peels the name plates off and replaced "Life Support" with "Weapon systems" and vice versa.

Should be interesting to see the results. I, also found the captains quarters. I will hide in here for a while until I get more commands from the armada. In the mean time, I can snack on some peezza-schplam.

Hunter-Seeker of the Third Triad Thar T'pak out.

 

[Temporary Account]

Ensigns Log: Stardate - .000000000000000000000001

I recieved a visit from Doctor OshadowO. He gave some sleeping pills and toothpaste. I'm not sure, but I think the good Doctor may be partaking a little too much of his own medication. He gave me a ludicrous prescription to brush 50 times a day! I'm sure he must have been mistaken...maybe he meant 5. That sounds more reasonable. While the sleep was very peaceful, and the headache and nausea seem to be gone, I know have an attrocious case of diarreah. I suppose it's to be expected though, after eating all that cheese.

I've been commended by Lt. Cmd. 8-4-7-2 for my efforts, and he's recommended me for a promotion! He also informed me that there is an opening for Communications Officer, which I'm very happy about. I hope the Captain is amenable to his suggestions. I'm hoping to feel better by tomorrow and get back to my duties. Especially if we are going to the pleasure planet, as some rumors have stated. I feel the whole crew would benifit from a break. I'm glad my superiors see this also. Oh boy...bathroom break...

<End of Log>

 

[Vortex]

I fear that the lifeform I was attacked may still be onboard. I was taking my pet Gengar for a walk when it pointed out to me that the labels for life support and weapons systems had been switched around. A nice attempt at sabotage, I guess, but considering that both consoles have different layouts and there is no such weapon system as "artificial gravity", it is also rather laughable. It is not long before this intruder does some serious damage however, so it would nice to find it as soon as possible. We are now six hours away fom the location of the escape shuttle. We just hope that the occupant is able to hold uot for that long.

 

[MoyDoy]

Chief engineers log stardate: 321658.9

I have been unable to chat with most of my crewmates because of all the work I have performed. The pokemons made quíte a mess down here in engeenering and I had to go up on the bridge to fix some of the controls that the wavy air guy smashed. All is well now and I have heard that we are getting a wounded member of that lost ship that the pokemons blew up. I still fear the doctors intensions on this ship and I have heard that he's methods are a bit...unconventionale.

 

[8-4-7-2]

Tactical Officer's log Stardate 59852233.5

I detected an anomaly in our life support system, causing a dangerous low level of oxygen on the bridge. So I went to the controle station and pressed a few buttons, when suddenly a huge explosion rocked the ship. I soon found out that I've accidently activated our new multi target phaser phalanx.
(Someone switched the stations' labels and due to the lack of oxygen I lost orientation).

The scans showed that we had a lucky shot and destroyed a cloaked Hirogen vessel.Further examinations showed Hirogen fingerprints on both stations. HAHAH... nice attempt, but it went into the wrong direction! Perhaps we have even destroyed Mr. wavy air's personell shuttle.

As everyone knows Hirogen ships have a Monotanium hull armor. I suggest we quickly salvage the debris. We could for example enhance henke. And who knows what else we can do with it?

 

[Cap'n Beeb]

Starlog: 363

Starlog: 363

Due to the recent events of the switching name plates for critical components in engineering, I am almost certain of two things.

1. Someone is trying to sabatage us (not a very good job though)

2. Its probably the wavy air guys doings.

So therefore, I am advising everyone to try to eliminate the wavy air thing before it can do any serious damage.

Oh, someone threw a whole bunch of those annoying 20th centry AOL discs into the weapons locker. Even though this could be bad, they serve as a weapon I call "death frisbies." They fly really good, have excellent range and stability, and are razor sharp. I have tons of these things, if anyone wants some, take a whole bunch, I don't care. Just get them out of here!

Also, I have gotten ahold of a spare replicator, and I will begin work on it as soon as I can so we can get some edible pizza here!

 

[OshadowO]

Medical Officer's Log
Star Date 9865354321 and then some more

My experiments with the Pokemon breeding have gone horribly wrong. A mutant Pizza came out and it devoured my RaRa instead of mating with it. I was planning on dissecting it when I heard the Mutant Pizza trying to say in it's squeaky voice, "Kill, Kill Hirogen Hunter...Kill Hirogen Hunter." Since I had no further use for the mutant Pizza I let it loose in the hopes it would do some damage to the hunter who has no means of escape now. In the meanwhile I will continue to try and breed a Pizza and RaRa in hopes of getting PizzaRaRa...damn I need some decent Pizza.
Supplemental
They placed me on alert, it appears we are on a rescue mission to save some schmuck from somewhere. I still need to find some decent medicine in this ship, the Poke Medicine just does not work well on humans. I hope the ensign is Ok. I will leave him a message to brush, I like the guy.
Suplemental's Suplemental
GASP! I think I have seen MoyDoy in engineering. My old enemy. Could it be that he survived the hydrogen-chlorinate-carbohydrate protien plague invasion that infested Captain Rooster's ship while he was patrolling the feeble-warble system?? This is not good I must watch my step. I cannot do anything o dissect him...err move against him but I will bide my time. Now I must go to deck 16 II for I was told that there may be some real medication there.

 

[RizMan]

Personal Log, Stardate 58973.6

I'm doing this with my last resources I have. I won't stay alive very long I think. I managed to get the cummunication system to work again and I'm constantly sending out my position using a starfleet identification code, so that anyone who gets this signal can track me. I hope that there will be rescue soon. Hopefully the Lorg won't find me first or worse, the aliens which attacked the USSArabella

End Log

 

[OshadowO]

Medical Officers Log
Star Date: 20 minutes after my last entry.
Damn that Mutant Pizza Pokemon jumped out of the ship and was sniffing outside in the debris or the Hirogen Hunter's ship. Idiot. I had to use the tractor beam to pull him back inside and unleash him unto the hunter again.
I left the captain a message on his holo mail about the lack of human medicines and now must return to deck 16II so I can find some medicines. I think I might have to go deeper in though, to the liandri central core, But I hope that MoyDoy isn't hovering around in there.
Supplemental
This deck 16 place sucks. Damn it I need human medicine...Oww god damned slime in Deck 16 this place is dripping with goo!!

[Edited by OshadowO on 08-09-2000 at 11:20 PM]

 

[Vortex]

commander's log ???

We are now within visual range of the stricken starfleet shuttle. I will hail the occupant to alert him to our approach. I am not sure how to bring the ship aboard. The hull appears to be in a bad away and using the tractor beam could cause the situation to worsen. Either way, we must act quickly as I detect an unknown vessel approaching our coordinates. The sooner the starfleet officer is rescued, the sooner we can take the Etarnaty to that paradise planet whose name I've forgotten. We could all do with a break. Also, I have not heard from, nor seen, the captain in a long time. I fear that CaSC...CaSc.. Cascade may be in deserted area of the ship suffering from a spam-related illness. With all the stuff that has been smeared on the walls I'm surprised we're all still alive. Perhaps the captain is also afraid to visit the sickbay incase he becomes the subject of the doctors unusual methods.

end log

 

[8-4-7-2]

TO's log Stardate who cares?

We have arrived at RizMan's rescue shuttle. Because it is severly damaged Commander Vortex was worried to use the tractor beam. I adviced him just to beam this officer out and forget about the ship which is damaged beyond repair.
As I heard about really strange methods of Doctor OShadowO (he uses pokemon medicine and wants to dissect everyone) I transfered Ensign RizMan to holodeck 2 and let our old EMH work at him. If his state of health get worse we can still call Doctor OShadowO.

Commander Vortex thinks that the Captain may be harmed during the last combats. I must inform that the same thing could have happened to our science officer Skumboy too.
I sent people out to search for them

We are now on our way to Casperia Prime and I can't wait to eat my first real pizza for years. Oh and the girls there......

<computer: end log>

 

[MoyDoy]

Chief engineers log stardate: Getting closer to pizza-time

I have decided to confront OshadowO and find out what he's intensions are. I will arm my self but I will also explain to him that I do not intend to hurt. I am afraid that this might be my last log.

 

[Thar T'Pak [=AA=]]

Starlog - Ahh forget it

Hunter-Seeker of the Third Triad Thar T'pak reporting.

I have finished going through the head prey's living cube. Nothing abnormal to report, except for a pair of red spike heeled shoes and a red dress.

hmm

I grabbed a spare communicator to listen in on them. It appears that they have completed another rescue. And it appears that they don't trust thier doctor. Hmm how funny.

I shall leave the captain's quarters and head back out into the bridge. Since they have destroyed one of my ships, I'll need to radio the armada for a new one. In the mean time....

Ahh we are approaching Casperia Prime. A front for a hunter's guild there. I should be able to resupply and contact the armada from there. Good.

Now I think I'll head down to where they keep the injured. Maybe I can catch the one prey confront the doctor prey.

Hunter-Seeker of the Third Triad Thar T'pak out.

 

[RizMan]

RizMan's Log, Stardate 59879.3

The last thing I can remember was a hail from a starfleet ship named USSEternaty. Never heart of that before. I couldn't answer the hail, cause I was unable to move, lying on the floor. But what a relief when I heart the message: This is Commander Vortex from the USSEternaty. We're going to beam you to our sickbay.
Next thing I can remember is that I woke up in sickbay. I was told by the doctor that I was unconscious for about 1 day. However it seemed that this was not a real doc, but the EMH. Don't they have any doctor on board? He told be I was going to get better very soon, but I do not trust these Holodoctors all to much.
I'm still not able to move, so the only thing I can do is have this logbook for the moment.
However, I'm getting tired. I still feel pain, even if I got some medicine from the doc.

End Log

 

[Sam_The_Man]

Communications Officer's Log, Stardate The Morning After The Night Before

Exactly according to my plans, TO 8-4-7-2 gave me permission to repaint the USS Eternity. This job, though seemingly menial, gives me an oppurtunity to put the only unfulfilled part of my plan into action... replace the energy weapons armory with huge, blood-stained battle axes. To do this I have decided to destroy the USS Eternity and the armory with it, then put a few axes in a heap and call it the new armory, as this is more fun than simply bugging the Captain.

Because of this, I will be going out onto the ships hull now, to start Phase 547653 of my plan into action (if the Stardates don't have to have continuity then nor do my Phases). This will seem like an unenviable task to the rest of the crew, and very dangerous. This will give me all the time I need to start my plan, as everyone will think I am dead if I am late back. Furthermore, no-one will care since I apparently make stupid suggestions.

While for this task a space suit might appear to be the best equipment, I shall instead take a horde of Pokemon from the ship's breeding center and suck the air out of one of their lungs every 2 minutes. This will enable me to watch the Pokemon asphyxiate horribly in deep space as well as start Phase 547653.

I shall now leave for the ship's airlock. I shall use a radio connected to this log to make futher supplementals.

 

[Yellow5]

Stardate 59881.5

SMASH!

 

[Cap'n Beeb]

Starlog: WTF???

I fear we have a traitor among ourselves. This person is Sam_The_Man or something. He plans to destroy the ship, among other things. This includes my armory too!!! AHHH!! I am setting out to capture this little *censored by computer* and kick the living ****e out of him.

Also, whoever is in charge of ordering parts, I suggest a Red Arrow 7-beam hull-piercing Projector. Excellent for taking out ships way out in the distance.

I have found something in the replicator which could be the cause for the cardboard tasting pizza. There is a little piece of cardboard jammed in the main mixing component (dont know what the hell its called) which throws a little speck of the cardboard into the pizza mix. I am proceeding to fix this right now, 'cause I can't wait long enough to get to the paradise planet for some real pizza.

Finally, what the hell was that SMASH sound I heard earlier? I know it came from something called Yellow5, whatever that is, I'm going to investigate that further.

 

[OshadowO]

Medical Officers Log
Stardate 696969696969
I like this date indeed. I also look forward to arriving at casperia prime. Nothing heels men better then some good looking women. I have also discovered to my horror one of my newly bred Pokemon missing. He was a queer little bugger who kept yellin "pH3aR m3!" in response to everything I said. I hope nobody uses it to sustain themselves in space for if they were to breath any air from it's lungs not only would that keep having to say pH34r m3 at the end of every sentence but they would smell like pizza, and bad one at that. Not a good way to arrive at casperia prime.
The survivor from the shuttle was sent to the EMH instead of sick bay. Damn I wanted to try this other pokemon medicine on him. But just as well as there is very little pokemedicine left on the ship. one that turns whoever is injected with it into a horrible pokemonster who has bad breath and farts and uses noxious smells to destroy it's prey. Not something I want to mess with. I think I shall have to rely on my knowledge as a shaman of the ancient arts to heal from now on.
MoyDoy has been missing. I did not see him in the liandri central core I was surprised since he is the ship's chief engineer. I think I will take an catious approach with him. No need to dissect him yet. Perhaps he will have the flu or something and I'll be able to use this other poke medicine remaining which turns people into roosters. Since he was always kissing upto captain rooster that should be fitting for him.

 

[RizMan]

RizMan's log, stardate 56979.3

I'm still in sickbay with this stupid EMH. I just can't stand these Holodocs. They only talk about their medicine crap, something I don't know a clue about. Apparently, he's a newer model then the one we had on the Arabella, but he's worse then ours was. He keeps asking how I feel. What shall I tell him: beside the fact that I was about to die and that I lost my friends not 2 days ago, I'm fine. Well, at least I'm alive, thanks to the EMH, have to admit.

As I lost everything I had, I'm gonna ask permission to stay onboard after having recoverd from my wounds.

When I woke up today, the ship's commander honored me with a visit. I asked to see the captain, but apparently, he's unavailable. Had he vanished? I don't know, the commander wouldn't tell me.
As the capt. wasn't there, I asked Commander Vortex to allow me to stay on the Eternaty after having recoverd. He said, he'll think about it and talk to the capt. as soon as possible.

End Log

 

[CaSCaDe]

Captainslog stardate: is there a count?

my apsence has been coused by a wavy air thing wich i think is a hyrogen hunter, after being told all the events happend during my absence i now KNOW it was a hyrogen hunter.
any how i was being held captive in my quarters by this wavy thing, after he left me for a wie-god knows why- iwas able to escape his wraith.

now that i walk tru the coridors of my ship a osme one floating tru space, it looks like our new ensin sam the man with some sort of mutant pokemon behind him and 1 in his hands, WTF?
OMFG! i see that our ensine is being eaten by the mutand pokemon that followed him!
i stand here stunned by the scene that playes before me!
...
...
...
...
...
oh well he was going to mute and destoir the ship ne ways, GOOD FOR HIM!

as for this wavy air guy, i have heared from my cso beerbaron that he can be killed with these tons of aol discs he has! FINALY A USE FOR THOSE THINGS!

as for ensine TA welcome well done son, u will be a fine com officer!

my next consurns go to the doctor shadow, he has some strange idease about medacine and if he doesnt change that soon i will need to trow him of the ship.

the rumors about us going to the fun planet that i have heared has waked my attention iwould be pleased to have some relaxation after being kept hostage in your own quarters.

we will stay there for about 2 or 3 weeks, this will do the crew good.

CaSCaDe out.

suplemental:

i think that the SMASH sound that was heared was from some sort of being called yellow 5 wich has almost the same powers as Q, so we will need to watch for this

also i have recieved word from starfleet that the will be put no charges against us for the refusal of orders, cuse starfleet finaly has seen that the tauron r a wurthy allie.
cuse we where held up due to the stuation onboard this ship i have send word to starfleet that they NEEDED to send an other ship that could do the mission.
it has been done.

so now we can finaly relax without having to worry about ne problems at hand (i hope)

CaSCaDe out.