The hidden truth about DarkPulse comes out!

[BobTheBeheader]

After doing much digging into forbidden histories, I've made a startling (some might say even shocking) discovery.

DarkPulse's real name is Dave 'MadDog' McDonald, and he is a Vietnam veteran. He was in a secret unit of gigantic obese guys who were deployed tactically to roll through the jungle and crush anything in their path.

After the war, the government, fearing a human rights dispute, covered up all evidence about the unit.

DarkPulse was placed in the Witness Protection Program, his age was faked, and here you see him today on BU.

 

[Rambowjo]

After the war, the government, fearing a human rights dispute, covered up all evidence about the unit.

Yet you know?

 

[BobTheBeheader]

Yet you know?

I have my sources...

 

[Big-Al]

you need to post evidence before they make you vanish!!

 

[Agent_5]

Yet you know?

He has juice powers!

 

[UBerserker]

You're possessed by a tentacle or something?

 

[Latent Image]

He was in a secret unit of gigantic obese guys who were deployed tactically to roll through the jungle and crush anything in their path.

 

[War_Master]

this is why you say "NO" to drugs and alcohol.

 

[N1ghtmare]

Bob you must hide now before the government tracks your location!

 

[Firefly]

this is why you say "NO" to small amounts of drugs and alcohol.

Fixed

 

[tomcat ha]

this is why you say no to dark pulse.

If you dont, in case of a fight, he might revert to army mode and roll you over.

 

[Kantham]

Total Recall 2!!!

 

[TurdDrive]

Hang on This is as wrong as ....

 

[TWD]

After The Jackal I don't think I can handle any more dark secrets about BuFers being revealed.

 

[Dark Pulse]

I reject this reality and substitute my own.

 

[funkblast]

This woman is the woman that gave Dark_Pulse the body which he has today. With recipes like this not even the might all the Soviet armies could crush Dark_Pulse.

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=u4zw99VsoMA&feature=related

 

[Breadtruck]

this is why you say "NO" to drugs and alcohol.

Hypnotoad commands you to think otherwise!

 

[KaL976]

I am in this thread

hypnotoad can go phuck himself













ps. ban funkblast

 

[Defeat]

He was in a secret unit of gigantic obese guys who were deployed tactically to roll through the jungle and crush anything in their path.

I loled hard.

This woman is the woman that gave Dark_Pulse the body which he has today. With recipes like this not even the might all the Soviet armies could crush Dark_Pulse.

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=u4zw99VsoMA&feature=related

:0000000000000000000

*Adding comments has been disabled for this video.*

I think 4chan may have gotten ahold of this at one point, then again it would probably have a few mil watches if they did.

edit: LAWL @ final calorie count

 

[Bersy]

She left out the part where she throws it all down in one mouthful and says "what's the main course?"