You are still being Marilyon Brandon. This contuines compeLETLY normally from the last time...
So you enter the subway and you're immediately bothered by COVID 1900C rules being present that everyone is being hysteric about. Geez, you heard Na Pali didn't have those rules, you should have fucking moved there ages ago come to think of it, why did you have to choose this mostly formerly abandaoned planet is beyond you.
Well, come to think of it, probably so na pali wouldn't be polluted with human civilization destroying the nature which is why the conflicts with spaec piratez began as they hated NATURE in the MILKKYWAY COCACOLTA GALAXY and because your people lived IN HARMONY with the nature you had to get the fuck out. But then they started building these expensive METAL structures here and it's not that better although they don't pollute the environment as much as ON EARTHZ and other shitty GARBAGE HEAPS in that FORMER GALAXY.
But you think to yourself the COVID 1900C situation must be organized somehow by the spaec pirates and you know that they already infiltrated this soeciety in SEKRETZ and will try to destroy it. If Confused JOHN is still with them, he must either believe their lifes or think he's too much BATass to actually care.
"AWWW FUCK IT?! THIS IS TAKIN' AEONS NOW LIKE AEON FLUXX. IM GONNA JUST GET THROUGH THOSE PEOPLE FAST CREATE PANIC AND SHOOT WITH MY SHOTGUN INTO THE CEILING LIKE SOME MFUCK"
*he grabs the shotgun, aims it to the ceiling and out comes a PEACEMAKER*
"WHAT?! I HEARD THESE GUNS CAN BE LOADED WITH ANY TRASH BUT THIS IS A NEW ONES FOR MEI!"
*the ARTIFICIAL CARDIAC PEACEMAKER lands on the floor in the tunnel where all the people are waiting on the platformz and it opens up, releasing PACE ROCKETS INTO THE AIR AND EXPLODING TERRIBLY*
*LIMBS FLY ALL AROUND AND ORGANS AND A PIECE OF FOOT LANDS IN YOUR MOUTH AND YOU START INSTINCTIVELY CHEW ON IT*
"Oh god, I killed all those innocent people haven't I?! WELL LIFES A BITCH AND SHIT HAPPENZ SO"
*he steps into a train to get to the other side of the city, obviously noone stopping him because he'sa eh cool guy and doesn't afraid of anything*
You see an abandoned phone lying on the floor, it is not the smartypants phones type but what the heck, you grab it and you look up the phone number of that company that sells the smartypants types and you just call while you exit.
"SO GUIZE, IM ON THE OTHER SIDE OF THI CITY SO WHERE YOU GUZ AT NOW?!!!"
"The street VANGUARD AVENUE number 666/666 MY FRIEND, YOU CUNT MISS IT"
"Oh I see that street all the way there but its very LONG like FUCK, so what side are you AT? IS IT TOWARDS THE BIG AIRPORT?!"
"Yes, you could...say it that way, just go straight to the left"
So you go to the left, taking a shortcut because you've been before at this airport, you arrive at the airport but you see no signs of the company nothing. So you call agayn.
"I don't see you, I'm at the airport, where are you exactly?"
"*chuckles with laughter* oh, well, do you see those blue p0layershp textured buildings somewhere? That's where we are and it's all the way at the end of them."
"But that's not even on this street, this street is in fact a highway here, how am I going to cross this traffic here there's no crosswalks?"
"That's up to you, just run across it, hehe, good luck oh and by the way we close in 5 minutes, counting, if you don't make it in time we just close the till, also what was it you ordered?"
"I'm GOING FROM ALL THE OTHER SIDE OF CITY, I EVEN KILLED PEOPLE JUST TO BE ON TIME HERE WHICH TAKES A TOLL ON ME AND YOU TELL ME THIS?! I ordered the SMARTYPANTS PHONE WHAT ELSE!"
You make it across the highway by dodge leaping across like in some shitty MATRIX knockoff movie and make it to the entrance of the road to the building complexes and you make that clear to the CLERK JERK.
He responds
"Oh but I don't have any smartypants orders listed here, but well come, I will ask COLLEAGUE, we're waiting for you...in the test chamb...I mean here the last test building 666/666 hehehaauyhaeaehuehue"
*you run like there's no tomorrow, nothing left of your high heels and you finally make it in*
At the till, an EVIL CLIFFYB with newyorker jeans is STANDING!
"Now, I thought you will not make it, huh... well *he holds the smartypants phone*"
"THATS IT THATS MY ORDERED SMARTYPANTZ PHOEN GIMME"
"Not so fast, I need your order number."
"WHAT?! I HAVENT NOTED IT DOWN IN THE HURRY, I BARELY MADE IT I KILLED PEOPLE YOU KNOW THAT ALREADY"
"Yes yes" *i should note that down for the feds of course* he whispers
"WHAT DID YOU JUST SAY?!"
"Oh nothing, but really if you don't give me the number the system won't let me in"
"I CAN SHOW YOU MI YD RIGHT NOW, I CAN GIVE YOU THE PHONE NUMBER TO VERIFY AND E_MAIL ADDY, SO WHATS THE PROBLEM?!"
"Oh well, there's really nothing I can do..pity."
"YOU BETTER BE KIDDIN ME YOU FUCK UGLY NWEY YYORKNER EVIL CIFFTLYB!! I WILL COMPLAINT TO YOUR BOSS"
"OH NO DONT COMPLAIN TO MARK REIN PLEASE, NOTHING BUT THAT! Ok DuDEBRO here's the deal...err what was your name again?"
"Marilyn Brandon you SILLY"
"Okay...I don't have it here but if I reset the system....AH THERE YOU ARE MARILYJIN I SEE YOU RIGHT HERE, OKAY ITS YOURZ NOW!"
*he gives you the SMARTYPANTZ PHONE and smiles embarassingly*
You walk out a store and Mr. Profit appears and adjusts his tie "Quite a nasty piece of jobosh you've done back there, I am IMPRESSED!"
"Who are you? You from the feds?! I was in a hurry."
"No no, but I know of your...lost friend...maybe there are ways we can...work together..."
"WHAT HAVE YOU DOEN TO HIM?! CONFUSED JOHN"
"Nothing, my ally, I have brought him here to continue on your quest with you, it was one of his wishes after all and after he's done some great JOSH for me, I offered him I'd take him to you."
REJOICE! YOU HUG CONFUSED JOHN AND OFF YOU GO INTO FUTURE ADEVNTURRUEESSSSSSSS!!!!!!!!!!
https://archiveofourown.org/works/32402533
