All new for 2010, it’s the Cadillac Crapolia.
You buy jeans with that lived-in look. You get comfortable by putting on that old T-shirt. Why not relax and unwind in the Crapolia? No more worries about people dinging your car with their doors. No wasted time washing and waxing your car. If your windshield gets cracked, who cares?
This thing is a real piece of crap, and it comes directly from the factory this way. Cool, huh? How much would you expect to pay for a new Cadillac? $35,000? $45,000? $55,000? The Crapoila is reasonably priced at $2,000. That’s right, $2,000 for a brand new Cadillac. Tell all your friends that you drive a Cadillac with pride.
We went to our Design Team and told them we need a car that people can relax in and won’t cost them an arm and a leg in today’s economy. Seven months later the Crapolia was rolling off the factory floor.
Features include:
- Broken Radio
- No Spare Tire
- Pre-Rust
- Post-Rust
- Mega-Rust
- One Whitewall Tire
- Broken Turn Signals
- Gushing Blue Exhaust Smoke
- Engine Backfires
- Electric Seats that don’t work
- Ripped Interior
- No Seat Belts
- Welded-closed Driver’s Door
- No-Reverse Transmission
- Pee-Odor
- Rats
- Leaky Gas Tank
- No Power Steering
- Carbon Monoxide Poisoning
- One Fun Color, Faded Blue
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Roscoe Pimpturd says:
I saved so much moneys when I boughts dis ride dat I has extra moneys to spend on my bling. I tells all my homies dat I be drivin’ a Cadillac and they all like, “You be stylin’, Bro.”
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