If there is no flower in you pants how can you hope to cheese the sprocket
of the turnstile of Orange? For Christ's sake you have made the baloney
sandwich an now you are going to have to sit with it, you won't be feeden
off of brains this evening! No-sir-ree-bob! You didn't even bring a straw!
The power to suck the brains will be mine anyway. Me want brain-sucky!
****en' evil piece of fruit. FRUIT! STUPID FRUIT!!! Always coming after
me with a pickaxe. How can it lift something so heavy? And at this time of
year? Doesn't make sense. **** none of this makes sense, what the hell?
The walls are closing in and I can't find my spatula. It was rubber and
nice. I needed it to roll my applesauce into something much more pen-like,
like a thumbtack! Ow those hurt when I sit on them. Stop doing this to me.
Why won't they stop? I was good! I didn't even reject the turtle you tried
to shove up my nose! I named him sparky. He Sparky. VERY sparky that
Sparky is. It could be the 10,000 Volts of electricity running through him
though. Not sure, I'll test it with my tongue! Ow! Heh heh. Good 'ol
Sparky! He always knows who's poo it is. Especially when it's orange and
glowing and came out of the Martian. He tickles! Damn that emu! Why
didn't he say goodbye before plummeting off that cliff onto the Volkswagen?
"Riding Satisfaction" my left buttock! He didn't even beep the horn on
impact! What a looser! Stupid emu.
Grinkle snacks and rotary cakes! Snarfle people in yellow tutus eat pine
cones while bathing in a stream of the river! My goodness I just can't take
the funky gyrations of my socks anymore! It's just too much for me! Wheee!
Neet roots. Bad clusters give me indigestion; how to they interface with
YOUR cerebral cortex, huh? Well huh? Huh? Huh? Well huh??? Hey, that's a
pretty snappy beat! Sing it with me now! Well huh huh huh well huh huh huh
AOW! uh huh huh well HUH! Yeah! Get down! Get over! Get up! Stop it
with the face! Eww! You look at your mother with that face?!? What do you
mean she gave you it?! She a nice woman and I won't stand here and let you
slander her good name!! Nice underwear by the way. Sonama*****! That
cut's it! That's just it! No more sniffing gasoline for you Mr.
Monkey-Man! Put down the snorkel and release the Swedish Bikini Team! I
called next! Yes! They brought sloppy-joes! I LOVE sloppy-joes! They are
meat-candy! In meat form!
Hey! My business cards don't say anything about my rubber and horse-shoe
fetish! They aren't very nice, smelling my back like that. My back has
feelings too you know! Like last week it felt really hot! And mind you it
had nothing to do with the glowing red poker being slowly inserted into my
kidney! Whoo-oo! That was a rush! Almost as good as when I ate the
Papillian Insanity Beans and drank the blue stuff I found in the gutter! I
mean hey, it was blue. You can't blame me for the rudimentary telephone
coverage in Mongolia! Oh, what? Just because I trained the marmosets and
taught them to use crackers as little hats you think you can blame me for
all of this? Next thing you know you will be saying I started the release
of that dangerous disease that happened to be released from my work during
my shift. And the fact that I was juggling the samples is no basis for these
accusations! I'm calling my lawyer! I'm calling my accountant. I'm
calling my mother! No, I'm not calling her THAT. Don't be silly. That's
for my toes to decide. SO WHAT YA SAY THERE TOES?!?!? YOU WANT TO RIDE TO
THE MARKET ON THE BACK OF A FLYING RHINOCEROS WHILST EATING CHEEZE-WHIZ IN
THE PARK DURING MAY ON A RAINY DAY AND WEARING BALLERINA SLIPPERS?!? Damn,
me too. You must be psychic, like you read my mind even. HOW DID YOU DO
THAT!?!? Are there words printed on my brain? What do they say? Did you
put a
little-mind-reading-look-into-my-brain-and-read-whats-inside-machine-that-re
ads-my-mind in my head? Do you call it the LMRLIMBARWIMTRMM for short? Or
do you call it Wendell? Dude, inquiring minds want to know. And what color
were the words? Green? Where they green? You KNOW what I say about stuff
that is green when in my head. That's right! Wallabies! I love them furry
bastards!
Great Scott! And Kirk and Spock too! The ovals are on the 4th floor!
Ovals bounce! Bouncy bouncy bouncy! All over the daffodils! If only my
mom could see me now. She would say something like: "Boy! Get that stick
out of your head!" I love my mom. Or is it Q-Bert that I love? I don't
know! People named Eusophioclese should be made to eat graham cracker and
water hose S'Mores. No not that kind. The other kind. 34 bad and nothing
to wear! Don't forget to do my makeup and hair! Eating string beans
without a care! I prefer to eat an apple to a pear! Thank you! My fans
await! Greebles!
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If it doesn't move, climb it. Or, if it moves real slow, that's OK too. Like old people.