After more than 20 years of being chronically online I can't help but feel a slight bit of disappointment at the current state of the internet. Perhaps it's just nostalgia? Due to changes in brain chemicals during our teen years people have a tendency to remember those years more fondly. I was a teenager during the years that forums like BeyondUnreal were at their peak. Perhaps my current dissatisfaction with internet culture is as simple as that? Or perhaps I've just been online far too long. I remember when YouTube was bought by Google. I remember when Facebook was opened up to my university. I remember when Digg collapsed to be replaced by Reddit. I was there posting every day when short form video content took off with TikTok. Watching Elon Musk buy Twitter and rename it to X has been some of the juiciest drama the internet has ever seen. Yet I feel more and more disconnected from it all. Maybe in your late 30's you just get bored of that stuff? I have two toddler boys now so it's not like I have tons of time to give anyways.
And yet I still find myself instinctively reaching for my phone, or opening up a new tab. As though there's something I wanted to look up, and had simply forgotten that it existed. Perhaps there was something on my Facebook feed that I missed? I open my feed to find it almost as I left it with Facebook showing me the same posts from 3 days ago. How can it be that I've added thousands of people on there, but it still only shows me the same 20 people or so? Maybe it was something on Reddit? There's less activity there since the revolt over API changes, but it's still more active than the disappointing alternatives. I see a few replies, but it's just the same old hive mind opinions regurgitated. Sometimes I wonder how much of the activity is from real humans. Does it even matter? The users have names, but I rarely bother to read them. It's just another name in an endless sea of names that I'll probably never see again.
As I browse I come across some stories about Epic Games. They've been in the news lately as they lay off a substantial portion of their workforce. It seems the company is finally giving up on trying to replace the steam store. Instead they're focusing all their investment on creating an open metaverse. Which really just means trying to compete with Roblox. Perhaps that could be an opportunity? Last time I stood at such a crossroads I decided that I just didn't like Fortnite, and watched that game blow up without me. Maybe Epic is about to create that custom content sandbox we always wanted? Can I even find the time and attention to invest into such a thing? Or is that just going to turn into another dystopian nightmare? Why wouldn't I be skeptical? That's just always the way it's gone. Especially with Epic Games who I feel is more like an abusive lover now more than anything. I can't get myself to hate them, but I certainly don't trust them.
Which is why I don't think my dissatisfaction with the internet is just nostalgia or burnout. It's because we screwed it up. The community that I made my home in my teen years died a slow death because the economic engine behind it was discarded. I've been involved in some good communities since, but it's just not the same thing. Society became so enamored with becoming viral sensations that we crushed the small communities. The places where you recognize the names. The places where you have history (even if that history is the embarrassing things you did as a teenager). Places where what you create can be appreciated even if it's insignificant. You're interested in what others are doing because they are part of your community.
Instead we're just digital refugees, and it sucks.
Anyways, the forum is still here. Plus there's Discord. I'll try to check in more often.
And yet I still find myself instinctively reaching for my phone, or opening up a new tab. As though there's something I wanted to look up, and had simply forgotten that it existed. Perhaps there was something on my Facebook feed that I missed? I open my feed to find it almost as I left it with Facebook showing me the same posts from 3 days ago. How can it be that I've added thousands of people on there, but it still only shows me the same 20 people or so? Maybe it was something on Reddit? There's less activity there since the revolt over API changes, but it's still more active than the disappointing alternatives. I see a few replies, but it's just the same old hive mind opinions regurgitated. Sometimes I wonder how much of the activity is from real humans. Does it even matter? The users have names, but I rarely bother to read them. It's just another name in an endless sea of names that I'll probably never see again.
As I browse I come across some stories about Epic Games. They've been in the news lately as they lay off a substantial portion of their workforce. It seems the company is finally giving up on trying to replace the steam store. Instead they're focusing all their investment on creating an open metaverse. Which really just means trying to compete with Roblox. Perhaps that could be an opportunity? Last time I stood at such a crossroads I decided that I just didn't like Fortnite, and watched that game blow up without me. Maybe Epic is about to create that custom content sandbox we always wanted? Can I even find the time and attention to invest into such a thing? Or is that just going to turn into another dystopian nightmare? Why wouldn't I be skeptical? That's just always the way it's gone. Especially with Epic Games who I feel is more like an abusive lover now more than anything. I can't get myself to hate them, but I certainly don't trust them.
Which is why I don't think my dissatisfaction with the internet is just nostalgia or burnout. It's because we screwed it up. The community that I made my home in my teen years died a slow death because the economic engine behind it was discarded. I've been involved in some good communities since, but it's just not the same thing. Society became so enamored with becoming viral sensations that we crushed the small communities. The places where you recognize the names. The places where you have history (even if that history is the embarrassing things you did as a teenager). Places where what you create can be appreciated even if it's insignificant. You're interested in what others are doing because they are part of your community.
Instead we're just digital refugees, and it sucks.
Anyways, the forum is still here. Plus there's Discord. I'll try to check in more often.