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True Story

Discussion in 'BuF Classics' started by Lizard Of Oz, Nov 19, 1999.

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  1. Retro|PuF

    Retro|PuF Skilled

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    hehehehehehehehe

    If I were being confronted by a zookeeper, I gotta say that I'd go willingly and without restrain. We all know all the cool tools they have to keep animals (most of them larger and fiercer than us humans) in order:

    - typical steel prod
    - tazer/electrical stick
    - tranquilizers
    - muzzle

    Yep... no resistance for me. "I'm sorry Mr. Zookeeper!... It won't happen again - I promise!"

    (but the thought of grabbing the monkey's arm and yanking on it through the bars.... hahahahahhahaahahahahahahhahahaha!)
     
  2. Morety

    Morety The Farterator

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    My friend's wife worked at the Metro Toronto Zoo for a few years in their PR department. She told us (my hockey team) some hilarious zoo stories...

    My true zoo story:

    It's not well known, but the Toronto Zoo has an amazing collection of animal sperm. This is important as it helps ensure the survival of many species.

    Well, in order to get a sample from a rhinocerous, it takes a few people. There was a 'coach' who would call much like a rowing instructor, and he was saying "everybody up, everybody down, everybody up, everybody down..."
     
  3. iridium

    iridium ... loves Mr. Lamppost

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    morety, that is disgusting

    rotflmfnao to the rest of it though
     
  4. Selerox

    Selerox COR AD COR LOQVITVR

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    OMG!

    ROTFLMAO@this thread!!!!! :D
     
  5. B

    B Bee

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    BHAHAHAHA LMAO THAT MONKEY, I mean C'mon he's damn ugly :) LOL

    what a way to start a day, thanx guys!
     
  6. D66

    D66 Grey Pilgrim

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    You cannot touch my monkey!!!
     
  7. BeerGun

    BeerGun consultant in beerology

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    There's a place near where I live called African Lion Safari. You can drive your car along trails and gaze at rhinos, giraffes, lions, etc. My advice, don't take the car through there, use their monorail system instead.

    The monkey section is insanity. Monkeys perch in the middle of the path and won't move. Their partners climb all over your car and rip off anything they can get their little fingers under. We watched as they tore of my brother-in-law's wipers, side stripping, hubcaps, pieces of peeled paint, part of the vinyl roof, and other stuff I can't remember. You'd have to be an idiot to get out of your car and try and stop them, they might tear you to shreds. Eventually they moved on, throwing all these items at each other and letting the little monkeys play with the shiny new toys. I joked that there is a detailing shop just outside the preserve where the monkeys sell your car parts back to you. I'd warned him this could happen beforehand, so he couldn't get pizzd at me, and luckily his car wasn't worth much.... :)
     
  8. Kristina|BFH

    Kristina|BFH Leave me Alone

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    Morety, LMAO now that's a job I can live without!
     
  9. GunnerX

    GunnerX 2345 Posts

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    :eek: :eek:

    ph34r mega DUNG!!!
     
  10. the~oreca

    the~oreca Retired.

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    HAHAHAHAHAHA first i have to say OMFG THAT IS FING HILARIOUS second, i would like to say HAHAHAHAHAHAHA third i would like to say HAHAHAAAAAA I AM DYING ON THE FLOOR. that is the funniest thing i have heard all day
    I guess that just made my day :)
     
  11. ZenPirate

    ZenPirate Living Legend (and moderator)

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  12. Merlin|BuF

    Merlin|BuF Magically Delicious

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    My dear god I haven't laughed this hard since ummm I don't know when probaly since I heard
    for the first time the "All your base thing".

    and Morety you make this thread what it is

    ohh dear.......
     
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