"The Woody Allen of the Medieval Anime world."

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Bad.Mojo

Commander in Chief o' the BMA
Mar 17, 2000
1,758
0
0
43
Ottawa, Ontario
Since my current machine is unable of running any but the lowest end of games, I've taken up the hobby of trolling abandonware sites for some good old-skool shiznitz.

Among these wonderful gems from TheUnderdogs.org, I found some game from '96... this game is more addictive than Tetris. Its seriously like 9.5/10... I give you...

<a href="http://www.theunderdogs.org/game.php?id=843">Princess Maker 2</a>!!!

This has to be the most messed up, cool, down right funny (even though its not a comedy) game I've ever played. You're this wandering swordsman, and for saving the world from Satan, you're rewarded with a 500 dollar-a-year salary and a god that gives you a 9 year old girl. Whipee.

The game starts off a year later when she's ten. You can make her do all sorts of fun stuff, but not yet. Now you gotta groom her. Soon enough though, you can make your daughter work on a farm, or as a lumberjack, or yes, even in the cemetary. Or, buy her a sword and some armour, dump her in the desert, and watch her get raped by bandits. That not good enough for you? Every year you can enter your pre-teen/pubescent daughter in the Harvest Festival, in the hopes she wins the art contest, the dance contest, or the bake-off. If these competitions sound to wussy to you, make her fight in a gladiator colliseum! Nothing shouts "Good Father!" like chucking your 12 year old daughter into a blood sport against giant pirates and wrestlers. If she's good enough at killing other people, you can have her kill people in the street for popularity. Don't like her bust size? Buy some strange pills from a wandering salesman and feed them to your daughter to make her breasts bigger. She'll thank you by asking you, her father, if she just doesn't have the greatest little ti<i></i>ts in the world, and by the way, she wants to marry you when she grows up.

Of course, with about 71 unique endings, including high-priced prostitute, bondage queen, and one where she marries her father, Princess Maker 2 has a limitless replay value. A must have.

By the way, here's a link where you download <a href="http://www.theunderdogs.org/game.php?id=89">Bad Mojo</a>, the game behind the name!

And by the way, even if you care about piracy, these are <b>ABANDON WARE</b> games... they're not supported or sold by the company, so its not like a) you can buy them and b) even if you owned them, have the disks replaced. Hell, PM2 is a beta... so pfft.
 

Bad.Mojo

Commander in Chief o' the BMA
Mar 17, 2000
1,758
0
0
43
Ottawa, Ontario
Oh, and in case you wondered...

There are a total of two other games I've ever recommended, ever... yeah, they had to be that good.

Those two games were Pyro 2 & Combat Mission, also relatively unknown, virtually eye-candyless games built entirely on <i>gameplay</i>. Remember how everybody got addicted to that sh<i></i>it? Trust me. PM2 is a really good, fun game.
 

Donnellizer

Fjæsing!
Jun 17, 2001
2,247
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0
Ocean Grove, NJ
Visit site
Originally posted by Iceman
Mojo you left Thief 2 out of your list! how could you forget the greatest game of all time (Until Thief 3) :) .

Iceman.

That's another great game, I loved Looking Glass Studios... I can't believe they went under. Yeah Thief 3 is looking great, but they don't have the whole original team which dissapoints me. Because I literally loved EVERYTHING about that game. But now it will have more than up to par graphics, before it was looking dated when it came out...

On a related note: Celebrate the death of Ion Storm!!!

BTW: Princess Maker 2 KICKS ASS! I played it all last night.
 

Hadmar

Queen Bitch of the Universe
Jan 29, 2001
5,557
42
48
Nerdpole
@Mojo.the.Red

Is there a reason (besides the "Red" in your name) that you use this :mad: smiley? Or is my browser buggy and displays the wrong?
 

Bad.Mojo

Commander in Chief o' the BMA
Mar 17, 2000
1,758
0
0
43
Ottawa, Ontario
<i>...Here's the story 'bout a man named Bad, poor forumeer barely kept his fuc<i></i>king head...</i>

Oh, the story behind that is back when my Bad.Mojo nicknamed still worked and the PU admins who help you get it back if you lose it because their old stupid system was fu<i></i>cked and gave you a randomly assigned gibberish password so you were screwed if anything happened would actually mail you back and help you out, I was always pissed off at the string of retarded, brain dead questions and suggestions newbies would make, so I started showing my disgruntled attitude towards it with that cranky face. (One such suggestion was to remove the MP5 and Hummer because they looked exactly like the ones featured in counter-strike. I "politely" explained how things in the "real world" look... and got a nice flowery letter from Bastard'O for making him laugh so hard.) Regardless, it ended up being a trademark, a sort of calling card of mine. In fact, a couple of times when a few forum old-guard other than me (like Neo, Shak, Snakeye, Zund, et al.) used it they ended up getting confused with me... so, there's the story.

Anyways, to all you princess maker 2 fans (and I know there are tons) if you really, <i>really</i> wanna cheat, edit the pm2.cnf file and put the line MOPI = 1 into it... then go to town to get two new shops... a beta shop and a "crazy" shop. You can skip to the end or just give yourself an assload of money (like I did the 19238th time I played it in a single day) to goof around and expirement with. Enjoy!
 

Donnellizer

Fjæsing!
Jun 17, 2001
2,247
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0
Ocean Grove, NJ
Visit site
Yeah, I tried to do that (found it on some site), and I couldn't open the file with ANYTHING. Could you post the edited file here? It's pretty small. Thanks.

BTW: Thanks for that background info, cause I'm a little new here.

Just goes to show you ********* I mean post.count isn't everything. It's just a measure of how much of a life you have... Meaning I have none :p
 

Bad.Mojo

Commander in Chief o' the BMA
Mar 17, 2000
1,758
0
0
43
Ottawa, Ontario
Okay, no problem -- but you should be able to edit it with a DOS editor or a plain vanilla win text editor like notepad... the problem is, in DOS .cnf was used alot for config -- not its some fuc<i></i>ked up MS autodialer.

Bonus history for you newbies: If I recall correctly, I was the first non-moderator member to have 5 stars (more than 1000 posts) long before anybody else. Hell, before Zund and Keiichi and all those others became Moderators. I used to come here alot during work cause I really didn't give a damn about fixing dumbass's computers and it was a good way to vent job-related stress. Anyways, here's the file. Its a zip cause .cnf isn't a valid extension.