BP
Please let me explain a little man. It's not that I'm so heartless as I am too empathetic. I tend to let these things get to me too much so now I just kind of minimze them.
Like when I read about this one guy named Cary Stayner,38 I think, who one day decided to gain entrance into 3 woman's hotel room by saying he needed to fix the sink in the bathroom and when he came back out of the bathroom, he held them up with a gun, told them he just wanted their car and money and if they co-operated they wouldn't be harmed.
Then after tying up the 2 teenage girls, 15 and 16, he brought the mother of the younger one into the bedroom and stangled her with a rope, then he brought the 16 yr old into the bathroom and put her in the bathtub and stangled her to death also. He then carried the bodies to their car and put them in the trunk. After that he wrapped the 15 yr old terrified girl in a blanket, put her in the car, and drove deep into the woods where he slit her throat and as she lay there dying she begged him with to shoot her so he told he the gun was never loaded and cut her throat once more almost decapitating her. Her left her there and burned the car never to be suspected even though he worked at the hotel. He was caught when he cut a 26 yr old woman's head off behind her house.
I can't even begin to explain the mental turmoil this whole thing gave me. I couldn't get it out of my head for months and months. The images of these girls were burned into my brain and it was driving me crazy how horrible of a thing happened to them. It made me feel like $hit every day how someone could just do that and have no problem with it. I would seriously take all of their places if I could and it has nothing to do with being a hero or a martyr or anything, it's cuz I feel so genuinely incredibly horrible about what this f.uck did and cuz these types of things effect me way way way too much,so I chose now to kind of almost laugh these things off. There is no point in making myself feel so bad over something I can't do anything about.
I hope this clears some things up and sorry if this post bothered anyone, I know I feel sick after remembering all that $hit again.