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Public Restrooms

Discussion in 'BuF Classics' started by -BHS-Snowdog, Sep 14, 2000.

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  1. -BHS-Snowdog

    -BHS-Snowdog New Member

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    Am I the only guy who thinks it's wrong to have to stand next to another guy while he does his business? Should I question my manliness because I get 'gun shy' in such situations? Does anybody else agree that business meetings should NOT be conducted in the bathroom? Have you ever told somebody walking out ahead of you to get their ass BACK there and WASH their damn hands before they grab ahold of the door handle? Why isn't there some sort of Federal regulation that speaks to proper ventilation in a public restroom?
     
  2. el Gato

    el Gato Has-Been

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    Hehe, then I have something that you may find entertaining. It's a little executable quiz on public bathroom usage, all about urinal placement. I'll try to post it later, but I may have to upload the file to the 'net. Not sure on the size, but e-mail may be possible (I got it from a friend that way)

    Let me know if you'd want to see it, I can attempt either transfer!
     
  3. Goughmezz

    Goughmezz Banned

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    Bathroom neuroticism:

    1) I ALWAYS if I have to wipe the rim of the toilet seat with a soapy paper towel and dry it before sitting down.

    2) I HATE taking a dump when someone else is in there with me (I like my privacy).

    3) I always wash my hands afterwards.

    I also was in a public restroom in a movie theater once and you know where they placed the sinks with the big mirrors in front of them? Directly in view of the urinals (which did NOT have dividers in between) so when you looked up from washing you hands, you get a bunch of c*cks to stare at! lol!! My thought as I walked out the bathroom was "Who the f*ck designed THAT layout!"
     
  4. BillyBadAss

    BillyBadAss Strong Cock of The North

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    It's all about layers of toilet paper. You have to make sure that you have the seat covered and your ass protected. Some bathrooms you have to squat since they are so bad.
     
  5. [BuF]Wacky

    [BuF]Wacky New Member

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    Nah... I always crouch so that I don't actually have to sit on the toilet. I can also take a dump in less than 90 secs (The length of time I can hold my breath.) ;)

    I couple of weeks ago in college I was in taking a dump and I was annoyed since it was a runny one. Anyway, to my horror there was no bog roll so I had to kinda shimmy my way out of one cubical and into the other with my trousers around my ankles (someone walked in just as I was closing the door... I hope they didn't see me)
     
  6. BillyBadAss

    BillyBadAss Strong Cock of The North

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    Awwwaah!! I bet they saw your fecal ass!:D
     
  7. CHRYSt

    CHRYSt You can't help that. We're all mad here.

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    I just poo wherever I am, and save it to be flushed later.
     
  8. Morety

    Morety The Farterator

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    m0's

    wear diapers.

    ;)

    Gato, I've seen that one. Put the "x" by the urinal you would take if certain ones were occupied. That was cool. :)
     
  9. lunchblaze

    lunchblaze Codlike

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    dudes, i don't much worry about the public pee thing -
    as i swing wicked babyarm. WOOHOOOOOOOO!




    out.
     
  10. Wolf Blackstar

    Wolf Blackstar That other Wing Commander guy

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    Ever notice that a few years ago, you had real urinals with dividers, but now, with today's "modern" layouts, you walk in, and there's nothing but a long row of bowls the size of ashtrays to "do your business" in?

    One time, I was in there a long time - think the pee scene in the first "Austin Powers" - and while I'm in there, 5 guys in a row come in, one by one, and when they're done, each and every one of them walks out without even coming near the sink. Bleck.

    -[​IMG]
    [​IMG]
    ]LoL[Wolf|PuF
    [​IMG]
    -]LoL[ Counter-Sniper and Shock-Ho
     
  11. garrett

    garrett dreaming lucidly

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    i go in the urinal farthest away from people, and like triple layer the toilet seats when i go, other wise just go poo on the floor :D
     
  12. Morety

    Morety The Farterator

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    True Story

    I was in Alice Fazooli's one night drinking some beers with a lady friend (back when I was single).

    I went into the bathroom which was empty, and started going pee. Someone followed in shortly behind me and started peeing at another urinal. Well, I had a couple in me, and I've been holding some gas for quite a bit, as I didn't wanna fart in front of my friend. So I said "You don't mind if I fart, do you?". He says, "No, go right ahead". Well, I let out about 30 minutes of held gas out in about 3 seconds. It sounded like someone tore a hole in the Goodyear blimp. So the guys says "Now THAT was a fart!". I responded by saying "Yeah, but now I lost all my back pressure and I can't pee anymore!".

    Well, the other guys starts laughing his ass off, and so I started laughing too. I turned around and looked, and sure enough it was Buck Martinez. (He was a catcher for the Blue Jays and is now the TV commentator for them.) What a riot. Ended up shooting the shiznit with him for about a half hour after that.
     
  13. Gir

    Gir Offensive mode!

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    LOL

    That's Frickin Funny!!
     
  14. Goughmezz

    Goughmezz Banned

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    BWAHAHAHAHAHAH!!! Good story. =)
     
  15. Gir

    Gir Offensive mode!

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    I just told it to my friends, during supper (Yes, seven o'clock over here). They had a good laugh too.
    I had to go to the bathroom during the desert (I really had to). Of course, since that is not one of the most polite things to do I just said:
    "I'm sorry boyz and gals, but maybe if I can get rid of some back pressure, I can push some more rice (what we were eating) in my stomach."
    Of course I wasn't really being that funny at all, but when I sat on the toilet I farted quite loudly. I could hear my friends laugh for the next ten minutes or something..
     
  16. Troll|PuF

    Troll|PuF Poetic Terrorist

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    You guys are funny :) You'd have a big problem in San Francisco, where a lot of the bathrooms in bars and clubs are Unisex.

    So for instance, at the club I go to on Saturday nights , there is one bathroom. You go in, and you'll be at the mirror putting on your makeup and there's a guy not 5 feet from you , peeing. And of course there's usually a guy on the other side of you also putting on his makeup but that's besides the point.

    And at some bars when it gets really crowded, girls will go in the guys bathroom because frankly women take TOO DAMN LONG in there and after 3 Coronas, you will pee anywhere.
     
  17. BillyBadAss

    BillyBadAss Strong Cock of The North

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    I went to this club over New Year's in New York called The Lime Light. The bathrooms there were like it except they had stalls. They had this weird mesh stuff on the doors that you could only see out.
     
  18. -[BHS]-Redfrost

    -[BHS]-Redfrost Adept

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    That mesh must have played some weird mind games with you huh? I can just imagine sitting there trying to take a dump and you just get the feeling that all the people outside the door can see you because you can see them. I don't know about you, but I'd have a tough time with that!
     
  19. -BHS-Snowdog

    -BHS-Snowdog New Member

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    Unisex bathrooms? Stalls you can see OUT of?

    /me shudders.

    I don't even let my wife talk to me when I'm in there. Ah well, if this is the worst of my neuroses, I'm probably doing OK.
     
  20. Wolf Blackstar

    Wolf Blackstar That other Wing Commander guy

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    Hey Morety, great story.....]LoL[ is proud to have a captain who farts with the pro's. :D

    -[​IMG]
    [​IMG]
    ]LoL[Wolf|PuF
    [​IMG]
    -]LoL[ Counter-Sniper and Shock-Ho
     
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