S
STC_Wacky
Guest
ADAM AND EVE VIRUS: Takes a couple of bytes out of your Apple.
AIRLINE VIRUS: You're in Dallas, but your data is in Singapore.
ARNOLD SCHWARZENEGGER VIRUS: Terminates and stays resident. It'll be back.
AT&T VIRUS: Every three minutes it tells you what great service you are getting.
BILL CLINTON VIRUS: This virus mutates from region to region. We're not sure what it does.
BILL CLINTON VIRUS: Suddenly appears from nowhere, promises to upgrade all your applications, gains control of your computer, then totally corrupts your entire system for four years.
BILL CLINTON VIRUS: Gives you a 7-inch hard drive with no memory.
BILLY GRAHAM VIRUS: When you save a file, it prints "I am saved!" to the screen.
BIRTHDAY VIRUS - Keeps advancing your clock by another year.
BOBBITT VIRUS: Removes a vital part of your hard disk then reattaches it. (But that part will never work again.)
CHICAGO CUBS VIRUS: Your PC makes frequent mistakes and comes in last in the reviews, but you still love it.
CONGRESS VIRUS: Overdraws your disk space.
CONGRESSIONAL VIRUS: Runs every program on the hard drive simultaneously, but doesn't allow the user to accomplish anything.
CONGRESSIONAL VIRUS: The computer locks up, screen splits erratically with a message appearing on each half blaming the other side for the problem.
ELLEN DEGENERES VIRUS: Disks can no longer be inserted.
ELVIS VIRUS: Your computer gets fat, slow, and lazy and then self destructs, only to resurface at shopping malls and service stations across rural America.
FEDERAL BUREAUCRAT VIRUS: Divides your hard disk into hundreds of little units, each of which does practically nothing, but all of which claim to be the most important part of the computer.
FIELD OF DREAMS VIRUS: If you program, it will come.
FREUDIAN VIRUS: Your computer becomes obsessed with marrying its own motherboard.
GALLUP VIRUS: Sixty percent of the PCs infected will lose 38 percent of their data 14 percent of the time (plus or minus a 3.5 percent margin of error).
GEORGE BUSH VIRUS: Doesn't do anything, but you can't get rid of it until November.
GEORGE BUSH VIRUS 2: It starts by boldly stating, "Read my test.... no new files!" on the screen, proceeds to fill up all the free space on your hard drive with new files, then blames it on the Congress Virus.
GRIDLOCK VIRUS - Keeps shuffling information that it calls 'bills' between your CPU and BUS, sending messages like 'House Bill #xxxx is unacceptable to Senate'. Never gets any work done.
GOVERNMENT ECONOMIST VIRUS: Nothing works, but all your diagnostic software says
everything is fine.
HEALTH CARE VIRUS: Test your system for a day, finds nothing wrong, and sends you a bill for $4,500.
HILLARY CLINTON VIRUS: Files disappear, only ot reappear mysteriously a year later in another directory.
IMELDA MARCOS VIRUS: Sings you a song (slightly off key) on boot up then subtracts money from your Quicken account and spends it all on expensive shoes it purchases through Prodigy.
JERRY BROWN VIRUS: Blanks your screen and begins flashing an 800 number.
JIMMY HOFFA VIRUS: Nobody can find it.
JOEY BUTTAFUOCO VIRUS: Only attacks minor files.
LAPD VIRUS: It claims it feels threatened by the other files on your PC and erases them in "self-defense."
LEWINSKY VIRUS: Sucks all the memory out of your computer, then e-mails everyone about what it did.
MICHAEL JACKSON VIRUS: Hard to identify because it is constantly altering its appearance. This virus won't harm your PC, but it will trash your car.
MIKE TYSON VIRUS: Quits after two bytes
O.J. SIMPSON VIRUS #1: You know it's guilty of trashing your system, but you just can't prove it.
O.J. SIMPSON VIRUS #2: Claims that it did not, could not and would not delete two of your files and vows to find the virus that did it.
PBS VIRUS: Your PC stops every few minutes to ask for money.
POLITICALLY CORRECT VIRUS: Never calls itself a "virus," but instead refers to itself as an "electronic microorganism."
PRO-CHOICE VIRUS: Every 30 seconds it flashes you a message that it is OK to delete your most important files because it is your right and you will feel better about yourself if you do.
PROZAC VIRUS: Screws up your RAM but your processor doesn't care.
RICHARD NIXON VIRUS: Also known as the "Tricky Dick Virus". You can wipe it out, but it always makes a comeback.
RIGHT TO LIFE VIRUS: Won't allow you to delete a file, regardless of how old it is. If you attempt to erase a file, it requires you to first see a counselor about possible alternatives.
RONALD REAGAN VIRUS: Saves your data, but forgets where it's stored.
TEXAS VIRUS: Makes sure that it's bigger than any other file.
VIAGRA VIRUS: Makes a new hard drive out of an old floppy.
WARREN COMMISSION VIRUS: Won't allow you to open your files for 75 years.
WOODY ALLEN VIRUS: Bypasses the motherboard and turns on a daughter card.
"People tell me to ignore the voices in my head, but the voices tell me not to listen!"
[This message has been edited by STC_Wacky (edited 01-21-2000).]
AIRLINE VIRUS: You're in Dallas, but your data is in Singapore.
ARNOLD SCHWARZENEGGER VIRUS: Terminates and stays resident. It'll be back.
AT&T VIRUS: Every three minutes it tells you what great service you are getting.
BILL CLINTON VIRUS: This virus mutates from region to region. We're not sure what it does.
BILL CLINTON VIRUS: Suddenly appears from nowhere, promises to upgrade all your applications, gains control of your computer, then totally corrupts your entire system for four years.
BILL CLINTON VIRUS: Gives you a 7-inch hard drive with no memory.
BILLY GRAHAM VIRUS: When you save a file, it prints "I am saved!" to the screen.
BIRTHDAY VIRUS - Keeps advancing your clock by another year.
BOBBITT VIRUS: Removes a vital part of your hard disk then reattaches it. (But that part will never work again.)
CHICAGO CUBS VIRUS: Your PC makes frequent mistakes and comes in last in the reviews, but you still love it.
CONGRESS VIRUS: Overdraws your disk space.
CONGRESSIONAL VIRUS: Runs every program on the hard drive simultaneously, but doesn't allow the user to accomplish anything.
CONGRESSIONAL VIRUS: The computer locks up, screen splits erratically with a message appearing on each half blaming the other side for the problem.
ELLEN DEGENERES VIRUS: Disks can no longer be inserted.
ELVIS VIRUS: Your computer gets fat, slow, and lazy and then self destructs, only to resurface at shopping malls and service stations across rural America.
FEDERAL BUREAUCRAT VIRUS: Divides your hard disk into hundreds of little units, each of which does practically nothing, but all of which claim to be the most important part of the computer.
FIELD OF DREAMS VIRUS: If you program, it will come.
FREUDIAN VIRUS: Your computer becomes obsessed with marrying its own motherboard.
GALLUP VIRUS: Sixty percent of the PCs infected will lose 38 percent of their data 14 percent of the time (plus or minus a 3.5 percent margin of error).
GEORGE BUSH VIRUS: Doesn't do anything, but you can't get rid of it until November.
GEORGE BUSH VIRUS 2: It starts by boldly stating, "Read my test.... no new files!" on the screen, proceeds to fill up all the free space on your hard drive with new files, then blames it on the Congress Virus.
GRIDLOCK VIRUS - Keeps shuffling information that it calls 'bills' between your CPU and BUS, sending messages like 'House Bill #xxxx is unacceptable to Senate'. Never gets any work done.
GOVERNMENT ECONOMIST VIRUS: Nothing works, but all your diagnostic software says
everything is fine.
HEALTH CARE VIRUS: Test your system for a day, finds nothing wrong, and sends you a bill for $4,500.
HILLARY CLINTON VIRUS: Files disappear, only ot reappear mysteriously a year later in another directory.
IMELDA MARCOS VIRUS: Sings you a song (slightly off key) on boot up then subtracts money from your Quicken account and spends it all on expensive shoes it purchases through Prodigy.
JERRY BROWN VIRUS: Blanks your screen and begins flashing an 800 number.
JIMMY HOFFA VIRUS: Nobody can find it.
JOEY BUTTAFUOCO VIRUS: Only attacks minor files.
LAPD VIRUS: It claims it feels threatened by the other files on your PC and erases them in "self-defense."
LEWINSKY VIRUS: Sucks all the memory out of your computer, then e-mails everyone about what it did.
MICHAEL JACKSON VIRUS: Hard to identify because it is constantly altering its appearance. This virus won't harm your PC, but it will trash your car.
MIKE TYSON VIRUS: Quits after two bytes
O.J. SIMPSON VIRUS #1: You know it's guilty of trashing your system, but you just can't prove it.
O.J. SIMPSON VIRUS #2: Claims that it did not, could not and would not delete two of your files and vows to find the virus that did it.
PBS VIRUS: Your PC stops every few minutes to ask for money.
POLITICALLY CORRECT VIRUS: Never calls itself a "virus," but instead refers to itself as an "electronic microorganism."
PRO-CHOICE VIRUS: Every 30 seconds it flashes you a message that it is OK to delete your most important files because it is your right and you will feel better about yourself if you do.
PROZAC VIRUS: Screws up your RAM but your processor doesn't care.
RICHARD NIXON VIRUS: Also known as the "Tricky Dick Virus". You can wipe it out, but it always makes a comeback.
RIGHT TO LIFE VIRUS: Won't allow you to delete a file, regardless of how old it is. If you attempt to erase a file, it requires you to first see a counselor about possible alternatives.
RONALD REAGAN VIRUS: Saves your data, but forgets where it's stored.
TEXAS VIRUS: Makes sure that it's bigger than any other file.
VIAGRA VIRUS: Makes a new hard drive out of an old floppy.
WARREN COMMISSION VIRUS: Won't allow you to open your files for 75 years.
WOODY ALLEN VIRUS: Bypasses the motherboard and turns on a daughter card.
"People tell me to ignore the voices in my head, but the voices tell me not to listen!"
[This message has been edited by STC_Wacky (edited 01-21-2000).]
