Movies that suck...

[OICW]

I can say this with 100% confidence that these movies are complete and utter shit, even though they have not been released yet. And we're supposed to trust the moronic executives who fund this crap!?

Anaconda 2

http://www.apple.com/trailers/sony_pictures/anacondas/high.html

Santa Slay. This one is almost stroke-inducing. I don't know whether to laugh or cry. A monkey could shit on a type-writer and come up with a better plot than this.

http://comingsoon.net/news.php?id=4013

In Santa's Slay, Santa Claus (Goldberg) turns out to actually be the son of Satan, and not the harmless old fellow we know and love. Santa's bad side has only been kept in check because of an ancient pact with an angel. Now, on Christmas Eve, the truce expires, and Santa is suddenly free to wreak mayhem. Teenager Nicholas Yuleson (Smith) discovers the terrifying truth about Santa from his grandfather (Culp), and it's up to him to stop Santa's deadly rampage in their small town of Hell. With the help of his spunky girlfriend Mac (de Ravin), Nicholas must take on Santa and his Viking Hell Deer, in order to try to restore peace on Earth for another thousand years.

Dracula 3000:

The movie’s synopsis is provided on the site too: One thousand years into the future, and somewhere in the far reaches of outer space, a terrifying legend lives on. It’s the year 3000 AD. A salvage ship on a routine interstellar mission discovers the drifting, silent hulk of the off-world space transporter Demeter, reported missing 100 years earlier. Excited by the prospects of quick financial gain from towing back and trading in the old vessel, Mina, Van Helsing and the rest of their crew boldly board the abandoned ship, hoping to recover any valuable freight left onboard. But as they explore its cold, empty passageways, they become aware of a terrible secret. First Mina uncovers Demeter’s mysterious cargo – 50 long, black coffins. Then, one by one the crew begins to disappear or turn against one another, until there can be no doubt that an ancient curse lives on in the bowels of this once-great ship, awaiting its next victim. In the blackness of space the sun never rises, the ideal environment for the immortal vampire to spread his evil. For the survivors, the only hope for salvation is a desperate race across the universe, rocketing at the speed of light, praying that they’ll reach the welcoming rays of the Twin Suns of Halbron…before it’s too late.

Apparently the ending of the movie leaves it open for a sequel...or two.

http://www.moviehole.net/news/3139.html

 

[tool]

I think they got the Santa idea from Futurama.

 

[das_ben]

That Santa flick could be an awesome B-movie.

 

[O.S.T]

dracula 3000 sounds cool

 

[pikach00]

the worst movie off all times will always be:

Plan 9 from outer space

 

[NiftyBoy]

it kind of does. as for bad movies, the omega code has got to be the worst i've seen. yes, even worse than halloween 2, which was entertaining because of how utterly insanely stupid it was (death by crickets, army of businessmen). the omega code, however.. bad acting, inane (stupid/insulting/uncontinuous/etc) script, bad music, bad sound, bad camera-work... the only movie to have ever made me and my dad demand a refund. it was only worth the opening scene where the guy was running around an italian city, and every time, he'd run into a group of three jewish men and run away. and even then, that's only because you can go "oh noes they're jewish!"

 

[NeoNite]

Deep rising:
Ultra predictable, incredible bad acting, extremily weak storyline...
Everything about the movie just sucked. Even the ****ing monster did.
bah... waste of time :-/

Don't watch this movie. Just.. don't.

 

[Cap'n Beeb]

Deep Rising was pwnage.

 

[TossMonkey]

I love b-movie horror, evil dead is a classic example and it has a huge cult status. I really want to see Dracula 3000.

 

[NeoNite]

Evil dead is good. But I prefer evil dead2 ...
Nah, Army of Darkness=win.

 

[Sam_The_Man]

As long as we're talking about movies that suck:

Underworld

So your film sucks, despite the fact that it revolves around goths shooting each other in slow motion, which was basically the premise of The Matrix. So what do you do?

Answer: call in Bill Nighy! He makes any terrible film or miniseries bearable! And once you've got Bill Nighy in your film, what do you do? Well, obviously you make him spend half the film asleep, most of the rest of the film attached to a load of tubes not doing very much, give him about two scenes which even he can't ham up enough to make them funny, and then cut his head off.

Ugh.

 

[Assymilator]

Movies that suck?

Punch Drunk Love
Spy Kids 2
Apocalypse Now
and Get Carter

 

[Synastren]

dracula 3000 sounds cool

About as cool as a colonoscopy with no lubrication and a white hot poker, maybe.

Man, I just read Dracula a couple of weeks ago, and then this crops up. This is as bad as the '79 version of Dracula, but I dunno which one fscks up the story more.

Sigh.

Apparently, the person who wrote the screenplay didn't ever read the book, as sunlight didn't kill vampires; they just happened to be weaker during most of the hours of the day (they could only use their powers at noon during the day), but they were unharmed by the sun. At least, Dracula was. Minor vampires slept during the day, mind you.

Oi. Horrid.

 

[Kray]

Hey I kinda like Underworld.

One movie that really suck IMO is Black Knight, god its just awful. Bad script, bad acting, poor cast and so on and so on...never have I felt such a waste of time and money watching that.

 

[Waffnuffly]

They should re-title the santa movie to "Santa's Claws" and HOLY **** I want to see that! Santa eating children and killing old people will ROCK!

 

[OICW]

I think Santa Slay will be awful. Not "awful yet enjoyable" like some B-grade movies, but awful as in suicide inducing.

 

[ilkman]

Worst movie of all time: Battlefield Earth
http://battlefieldearth.warnerbros.com/

I heard it actually got oficially rated 2nd worst movie ever.

 

[Karsehole]

Apocalypse Now

I would really like to see some arguments with that one. My all time favourite movie along with 2001. Coppola crawls inside the human mind and just keeps digging further.

What's so terribly bad about Apocalypse Now?

Worst movie for me: Jaws: The Revenge.

 

[O.S.T]

Get Carter

get carter is a good movie


movies that suck really hard!!:

the matrix 3 and the mummy 2

 

[TheEndruu]

I actually liked the Mummy movies.

Apocolypse Now more so.