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Ask me about being Jesus.

Discussion in 'Off Topic' started by Cap'n Beeb, Apr 16, 2006.

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  1. Cap'n Beeb

    Cap'n Beeb Banned

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    Why? Wouldn't you rather nail up the fools who take my teachings way out of context? :(

    Don't worry, we've got something special in store for him.
     
  2. Jesus

    Jesus The _Real_ Jesus

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    Capn' Beeb.. oh beerbaron, what will we do with you?


    Whilst he is not jesus, pretty much everything he said is true.
     
  3. Kaithofis

    Kaithofis The Seldom Seen Kid

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    Impostor!

    I'd say we sue this bitch for using your name
    (I'll have 20%, thanks)
     
  4. Burningmace

    Burningmace Banned

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    Jesus, I'd just like to say that your sig is the funniest thing I have ever seen.

    Also, other jesus:

    My neighbours are like... the 'Ned Flanders' of christians. However, I'm into death metal, blowing stuff up, gaming until 4am, etc. How can I pursuade them to stop being total dorks and come over to the pwnage side?
     
    Last edited: Apr 16, 2006
  5. Jesus

    Jesus The _Real_ Jesus

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    i have a bunch of stuff on how to make home-made C4, let me know if you want it.
     
  6. Burningmace

    Burningmace Banned

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    Been there, done that. Besides, mercury fulminate is more fun.
     
  7. AizenSA

    AizenSA The Divine Tyrant

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    If you shouted in heaven would we hear it as thunder on earth
     
  8. Reciprocity

    Reciprocity Boots of Spanish Rubber

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    *What is the meaning of existance?*
     
  9. Burningmace

    Burningmace Banned

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    What really happened to Hitler's left testicle?

    Also, what the hell is the holy spirit?
     
  10. Maxx

    Maxx Bite Me

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    OK, I`m thinking of this for many many years now, but maybe you can help me out with your powers?

    If nothing sticks to teflon, then how is it staying on the pan?
    :confused:
     
  11. thewalkingman

    thewalkingman ssssssssssss bugger!

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    Jesus my hedges need trimming. See ya tuesday?
     
  12. Cap'n Beeb

    Cap'n Beeb Banned

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    Give them sugar. Didn't you see that episode where Bart gave Rod and Todd a pixie stick? Also, get the father a white wine spritzer, problems = solved.

    I don't hang out in heaven, it's too white and boring.

    To rock out every day, and generally have fun.

    The right one wrapped around the left when he was three. Ach, mein hoden ist tot!

    The holy spirit is a fruity drunk that smells alot like Old Spice.

    The bottom of the teflon molecules that are sprayed onto whatever object are adhesive, and thus cling to the object. When the teflon spray stops moving, it becomes non-stick.
     
  13. Zxanphorian

    Zxanphorian ( ͡° ͜ʖ ͡°)

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    How do I shot web?
     
  14. Selerox

    Selerox COR AD COR LOQVITVR

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    Clarification

    It's kind of an "as well as" thing rather than and either/or thing.
     
  15. Cap'n Beeb

    Cap'n Beeb Banned

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    Flick your wrist, of course.

    How about you and I go fundie smashing? :)
     
  16. namu

    namu Bleh.

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    Everything he said is true :eek:
     
  17. Enfyrneaux

    Enfyrneaux New Member

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    What fabric softener did you use for the Shroud of Turin? I heard that it was all-natural.
     
  18. Continuum

    Continuum Lobotomistician

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    Where is the internet?
     
  19. AizenSA

    AizenSA The Divine Tyrant

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    where is the end of the internet
     
  20. Cap'n Beeb

    Cap'n Beeb Banned

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    I never had a shroud. [​IMG]

    Right here.

    Post less.
     
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