Another in a series of Park-related Dilemmas

[QUALTHWAR]

I walk over to the park next to where I work and hit plastic golf balls around on my lunch hour. There’s this big tree that’s hollowed out at the bottom and I see this hard plastic file folder case stuck in the hole of the tree. I was going to see what was in it, tapped it with my golf club, but thought it might have a bomb, or rattlesnake, or something bad in it.

It was strange because it looked like someone was trying to make it look like it was hidden. As if they wanted someone to see it, but think someone was trying to hide it. That’s why I thought it might have something bad in it.

So when I get back to work, I say something to my boss about reporting it. He said it was probably some homeless guy’s stash, but that didn’t make sense. Anyway, I said the hell with it.

For the last 2 days, I see a palm leaf jammed in the tree hole. Now it looks like someone is really trying to hide the case. I’m thinking it might belong to a worker at the park. Like maybe they have their wine bottle stuffed in there or something.

What do you think I should do? Report it? Forget about it? Open the case myself? What if there’s a human head in there or something? Maybe I should carve my initials in the case.

 

[KurtonTheMagician]

Go for it. You were born for adventure.

 

[Continuum]

Tell someone you've hidden a box in the park with a present for them in it.

 

[Cat Fuzz]

A human head would be so cool.


....I mean, GROSS, it would be so gross!

 

[QUALTHWAR]

what if there's a midget in the box? one of those "angry midgets."

 

[Continuum]

pepper spray

 

[Cat Fuzz]

He could get beers for you from the fridge. Well, after you medicate him. Or let him have one beer for every three he brings you.

 

[QUALTHWAR]

Drunken midgets are uncontrollable. You can’t catch them because they run right between your legs and get away. You can’t punch them unless you lay on the ground, and then you can’t get much force in your swing. Besides, they just kick your teeth in while you’re on the ground.

 

[NeoNite]

Well, I don't know. I wouldn't open the case. What if there is indeed a midget in there.
Maybe he's just shy and wants to be left alone. Maybe there's another tree in the case. A world of possibilities, but I wouldn't touch it.

 

[oosyxxx]

Walk up to it naked. You're on peyote while doing this of course.

 

[QUALTHWAR]

last time i took my clothes off in the park, i got in big trouble.