1. This site uses cookies. By continuing to use this site, you are agreeing to our use of cookies. Learn More.
  2. Two Factor Authentication is now available on BeyondUnreal Forums. To configure it, visit your Profile and look for the "Two Step Verification" option on the left side. We can send codes via email (may be slower) or you can set up any TOTP Authenticator app on your phone (Authy, Google Authenticator, etc) to deliver codes. It is highly recommended that you configure this to keep your account safe.

A good joke

Discussion in 'Off Topic' started by Sebu_NZ, Jan 23, 2002.

  1. Sebu_NZ

    Sebu_NZ Kalashnikov's Personal Pimp!

    Joined:
    Dec 25, 2000
    Messages:
    1,760
    Likes Received:
    0
    Once upon a time in the Kingdom of Heaven, God went missing for six days. Eventually, Michael the Arch-Angel found him on the seventh day, resting. He inquired of God, "Where have you been?" God sighed a deep sigh of satisfaction and proudly pointed downwards through the clouds "Look Michael, look what I've made." said God. Archangel Michael looked puzzled and said, "What is it?" "It's a planet," replied God, "and I've put LIFE on it. I'm going to call it Earth and it's going to be a great place of balance." "Balance?" inquired Michael, still confused. God explained, pointing to different parts of Earth. "For example, North America will be a place of great opportunity and wealth while South America is going to be poor; the Middle East over there will be a hot spot and Russia will be a cold spot. Over there I've placed a continent of white people and over there is a continent of black people," God continued, pointing to different countries. "This one will be extremely hot and arid while this one will be very cold and covered in ice." The Archangel, impressed by God's work, then pointed to a small land mass and said “What's that one?" "Ah," said God. "That's New Zealand, the most glorious place on Earth. There are beautiful lakes, rivers, streams, and hills. The people from New Zealand are going to be modest, intelligent, and humorous and they are going to be found travelling the world. They'll be extremely sociable, hard-working, and high-achieving, and they will be known throughout the world as diplomats and carriers of peace." Michael gasped in wonder and admiration but then proclaimed, "What about balance,
    God? you said there will be BALANCE!"
    God replied wisely, "Wait until you see the wankers I'm putting next to them. I call them Australians!!!"
     
  2. 2_SeeK_U

    2_SeeK_U uni.... meh...

    Joined:
    Dec 19, 2001
    Messages:
    540
    Likes Received:
    0
    yeah.........
    Thats why us aussies beat you in cricket and rugby...:)

    Oh and l think you forgot something, what about you new zealanders and sheep......:D
    not bagging you personally...:)
     
  3. deeznuts

    deeznuts Pray for the blunted

    Joined:
    Nov 17, 2001
    Messages:
    178
    Likes Received:
    0
    My Austranian best friend moved back to Austrania. :lol: That's what I would call him. Geez, I miss him.
     
  4. OICW

    OICW Reason & Logic > Religion

    Joined:
    Mar 18, 2000
    Messages:
    2,374
    Likes Received:
    0
    Apparently God forgot to mention that for EXTRA balance, he made the NZ devoid of all the qualities they are supposed to have, and for further insult, made them sexually active with sheep :p

    Oh and having 50 odd million sheep and 2 million people has to mean that something is seriously wrong with the Kiwi's limbido :)
     
  5. Iceman

    Iceman Who Dares Wins

    Joined:
    Oct 6, 1999
    Messages:
    1,558
    Likes Received:
    0
    Nice one sebu ;) .

    Iceman.
     
  6. Sebu_NZ

    Sebu_NZ Kalashnikov's Personal Pimp!

    Joined:
    Dec 25, 2000
    Messages:
    1,760
    Likes Received:
    0
    I turn that frown upside down!

    My work here is done

    *poofs into a cloud of white smoke*
     
  7. OICW

    OICW Reason & Logic > Religion

    Joined:
    Mar 18, 2000
    Messages:
    2,374
    Likes Received:
    0
    You magically "poofed" into a cloud of smoke?

    Talk about being gei :)
     

Share This Page