1. This site uses cookies. By continuing to use this site, you are agreeing to our use of cookies. Learn More.
  2. Two Factor Authentication is now available on BeyondUnreal Forums. To configure it, visit your Profile and look for the "Two Step Verification" option on the left side. We can send codes via email (may be slower) or you can set up any TOTP Authenticator app on your phone (Authy, Google Authenticator, etc) to deliver codes. It is highly recommended that you configure this to keep your account safe.

A few words of wisdom.

Discussion in 'Off Topic' started by Kuroshio Apocal, Sep 1, 2001.

  1. Kuroshio Apocal

    Kuroshio Apocal Sucka Free

    Joined:
    Apr 5, 2001
    Messages:
    1,852
    Likes Received:
    0
    One day a bird was trying to fly to the top of a tree with a lot of branches. A bull was nearby and asked, little bird... why don't you just use the branches? The bird said, "No, I wish to fly to the top but I don't have enough strength." The bull said, "I have an idea... you can eat some of my droppings. They will provide you with the energy needed to fly to the top of that tree." So the bird ate the bull's droppings and, sure enough, flew to the top of a tree. Along came a happy trotting trigger happy hunter who just got an M1 Super 90 for his birthday and shot the bird out of the tree.

    Moral of the story? Bullshit may get you to the top of a situation, but it won't keep you there.


    Here's the follow-up story:
    A sparrow decides that it is too hard a flight to go south in the winter and refuses to migrate when the other birds leave. Winter sets in and finally gets so bad that even the sparrow realizes he needs to head south. But he is no sooner in flight than ice forms on his wings and he falls to the ground. There on the cold, hard ground he is freezing to death until a cow comes by and flops on him. The warm of the cow's droppings began to warm him up and he feels so good he jumps up and starts singing. The farm cat hears him and pulls him out of his messy condition, cleans him up and eats him!

    The morals of this story are:
    [1] Not everybody who shits on you is your enemy.
    [2] Not everybody who gets you out of shit is your friend.
    [3] If, and when, you do get into shit keep your mouth shut.
     
  2. Hadmar

    Hadmar Queen Bitch of the Universe

    Joined:
    Jan 29, 2001
    Messages:
    5,441
    Likes Received:
    27
    *lol*

    Great!
     
  3. Dano3000

    Dano3000 New Member

    Joined:
    Apr 28, 2000
    Messages:
    731
    Likes Received:
    0
    :lol: :lol: :lol:

    i think that just made my day karushio, thanks :)
     
  4. Ballistophobia

    Ballistophobia Hedonistic Forum Panacea

    Joined:
    Jul 15, 2000
    Messages:
    3,278
    Likes Received:
    0
    Duder, that was excellent. :)
     
  5. the vrrc

    the vrrc noexistant user

    Joined:
    Jun 16, 2001
    Messages:
    1,849
    Likes Received:
    0
    *TheVrrC laughs his ass off.*
    Hey, damnit, I just got that one! Well, off to the plastic surgeon again.
     
  6. Silver_Ibex

    Silver_Ibex New Member

    Joined:
    Feb 27, 2001
    Messages:
    654
    Likes Received:
    0
    ..
     
    Last edited: Jan 23, 2005

Share This Page