18 year old Breasts

  • Two Factor Authentication is now available on BeyondUnreal Forums. To configure it, visit your Profile and look for the "Two Step Verification" option on the left side. We can send codes via email (may be slower) or you can set up any TOTP Authenticator app on your phone (Authy, Google Authenticator, etc) to deliver codes. It is highly recommended that you configure this to keep your account safe.

Kristina|BFH

Leave me Alone
May 30, 2000
324
0
0
NYC
Visit site
A naked woman is bouncing on her bed singing. Her husband walks into the bedroom and sees her.

He watches her a while then says, "You look ridiculous! What on earth do you think you're doing?"

She says, "I just got my checkup and my doctor says I have the breasts of an eighteen year old."

She starts laughing and jumping again.

He says, "Yeah, right. And what did he say about your 45-year-old ass?"

"Your name never came up," she replied.

=====
May this be the best day of your life.
 

Kristina|BFH

Leave me Alone
May 30, 2000
324
0
0
NYC
Visit site
More Groaners

Why is Cinderella bad at sports?
Because her coach is a pumpkin, and she runs away from the ball.

What do you call a cow who has just given birth?
Decaffeinated

What do you call someone who doesn't fart in public?
A private tutor!! hehe

Do you know why flies have wings?
So they can beat the hillbillies to the watermelon.

How do you make a kleenex dance?
Put a little boogy in it! (old)

Did you hear about the dyslexic Satanist?
He sold his soul to Santa

Did you hear about the guy that lost his left arm and leg in a car crash?
He's all right now. hehe

How do crazy people go through the forest?
They take the psycho path.

How do you get holy water?
Boil the hell out of it.

How does a spoiled rich girl change a lightbulb?
She says, "Daddy, I want a new apartment."

What did the fish say when he hit a concrete wall?
"Dam!"

What do Eskimos get from sitting on the ice too long?
Polaroids.

What do prisoners use to call each other?
Cell phones.

What do the letters D.N.A. stand for?
National Dyslexics Association.

What do you call a boomerang that doesn't work?
A stick.

What do you call cheese that isn't yours?
Nacho Cheese. hehe

What do you call Santa's helpers?
Subordinate Clauses.

What do you call four bull fighters in quicksand?
Quatro sinko.

What do you get from a pampered cow?
Spoiled milk.

What do you get when you cross a snowman with a vampire?
Frostbite.

What do you get when you cross an elephant and a skin doctor?
A pachydermatologist

What has four legs, is big, green, fuzzy, and if it fell out of a tree would kill you?
A pool table.

What is a zebra?
25 sizes larger than an "A" bra.

What kind of coffee was served on the Titanic? Sanka.
and what kind of lettuce? Iceberg.

What lies at the bottom of the ocean and twitches?
A nervous wreck.

Why do bagpipers walk when they play?
They're trying to get away from the noise.

Why is pea soup more special than mashed potatos?
Because anyone can mash potatos.

What do a speedo and a cheap hotel have in common?
No ball room.

How did the hillbilly find his sister in the woods?
Pretty good.
 

Nemephosis

Earning my Infrequent Flier miles
Aug 10, 2000
7,711
3
38
OMG I never laughed harder at those terrible jokes!

de-calf-enated.... quatro sinko.... he's all right now! LMAO

Great stuff! :D :D :D
 

the~oreca

Retired.
Jul 10, 2000
2,730
0
0
37
NB, Canada
Originally posted by Kristina|BFH
A naked woman is bouncing on her bed singing. Her husband walks into the bedroom and sees her.

He watches her a while then says, "You look ridiculous! What on earth do you think you're doing?"

She says, "I just got my checkup and my doctor says I have the breasts of an eighteen year old."

She starts laughing and jumping again.

He says, "Yeah, right. And what did he say about your 45-year-old ass?"

"Your name never came up," she replied.

=====
May this be the best day of your life.

I saw that joke on a pr0n site about a week ago...
 

Balton

The Beast of Worship
Mar 6, 2001
13,428
118
63
39
Berlin
Re: More Groaners

Originally posted by Kristina|BFH
Why is Cinderella bad at sports?
Because her coach is a pumpkin, and she runs away from the ball.


oh, nvm...