Gamers that pee you off

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Adelheid

Bernstein
Jan 23, 2008
1,022
0
0
44
Nowhere.
Leap Before You Look

This kind of gamer will buy a popular game (for example Unreal Tournament) and will go straight to Multiplayer, either online or vs the computer, will naturally lose horribly, and will either:
a) Declare the game is ****, rigged, cheating, and never touch it again
b) Accuse the others of cheating and then disconnect in a huff because they were laughed at for not knowing the Rocket Launcher has a Lock-On ability
c) Start a zealous internet trolling campaign against all fans, sites and forums of the game in question

Time to beat: One run through Single Player and you'll be able to smear his remains halfway accross the universe with little effort.


Bash, Bash, Bash

It took you eight years to reach the pinnacle of skill, mastering every subtlety and nuance of the game, ultimately becoming the alpha and the omega. Your opponent is a twelve year old whos five year old brother helped him pick the "cheap" character because he looks the coolest, and then proceeded to mash the buttons and flail randomly with the stick, flailing and bashing at speeds almost beyond the laws of physics.

Time to Beat: Never, because neither one of you will see that 57 hit super ownage combo coming.
 

DarkED

The Great Oppression
Mar 19, 2006
3,113
17
38
38
Right behind you.
www.nodanites.com
I think he's on to something.

Fratboys/Popular Kids (AKA The Halo Players Coalition)

These are the gamers who only buy/play a game because it's popular, with no care about how good or bad it is. This group accounts for 99% of all Halo players.

Time to Beat: Varies. Whenever you can catch these people playing something other than Halo, you'll own them so fast it'll make their heads spin. Unfortunately, getting these people to actually try something other than Halo is on par with getting Microsoft to embrace Open Source.

World of Warcraft Addicts

These bastards are constantly thinking about the game. Their entire day is planned around maximizing their login time. These are the people you work with who seem to have no other topic of discussion besides Warcraft. They will tell you over and over about their last Raid in Molten Core, even though you could give less than two sh*ts about both Raids AND Molten Core. They also use leetspeak in everyday speech, mouthing verbal abominations like "Lawl" (lol) and "Pooned" (pwned.) "F*ck this, I'm rolling a Shaman" is a common phrase among these people.

Time to Beat: Everytime they open their goddamn mouths. And please do it violently and indiscriminately.
 
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Phopojijo

A Loose Screw
Nov 13, 2005
1,458
0
0
37
Canada
The Over-Critical Fanboy

These are the gamers who will bitch for years because the gun doesn't sound exactly the way it's real-world counterpart does. Common in the WW2 and modern combat genre.

Time to beat: Never... they're always in the forums and never playing the goshdamn game.

Proxies to IP Ban: I think we're up to a couple dozen with one of those dudes down at Gearbox Software.
 
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Vers Vlees

Oohhh a custom title
Nov 30, 2002
1,092
0
0
39
The Netherlands
www.versvlees.owns.it
Counterstrike public server players

I think its pretty well known that CS has a bad reputation when it comes to public server play. Not to mention some of them have a zealous fanboy obsession with this game bashing everyother game out there. They are probally very similair to the HALO players coalition.

The bad thing is that all those counterstrike players started to play other half life mods. Sure its not bad if they want to try something new but some of them cant stop bitching about how those mods are so bad because they arent similair to Counterstrike. However its funny to see CS noobs asking how they can buy guns in Day of Defeat and in Natural selection as a alien player :lol:
Too bad all those cheat programs written for CS found their way to other Half life mods. (OGC for example)

btw talking I'm about counterstrike for half life one here. I havent played CS source much.
 

SleepyHe4d

fap fap fap
Jan 20, 2008
4,152
0
0
Fratboys/Popular Kids (AKA The Halo Players Coalition)

I was thinkin of putting this one up when the thread first appeared because I have to deal with this **** in person on a daily basis but I decided not to cause I thought I'd just look like I was bitching about nothing. :lol:
 

Latent Image

Bring the rain!
Jun 3, 2001
2,297
0
0
41
Zer0's Anus
Loud Mouth Losers

Those who feel the need to tell you how absolutely awesome they are every time they frag you... These people usually end up at the bottom of the scoreboard as everyone ends up targeting them.

Suspense Nubs

Those that need to vote for Suspense EVERY FING TIME because "it came with the demo" and as a result "is the best map" ever in existence.
 
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Sijik

Snagged an item.
Aug 27, 2004
516
0
0
All Hallows Sunset
Not all of us Halo fans are so bad...

The Pseudo-Pro

These kinds of players will immediately decry anything that they consider not to be "hardcore" or "pro." Anything fun, new, or even slightly gimmicky causes a 5 page hate thread and often cries that the source of the material is completely incompetent and oblivious to anything but the cries of n00bs.

Time to beat: variable, some are actually experienced, some simply like to pretend they are, but if you manage to convince them to play on a map other than the two "acceptable" maps in their chosen game, they'll probably go down in no time.
 
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Zarkazm

<img src="http://forums.beyondunreal.com/images/sm
Jan 29, 2002
4,683
0
0
Agony
The Next Generation

I loathe the kind of player that'll praise the unoriginal FPS because it has some slightly improved shader effects while dismissing any notion of a classic game's qualities as nostalgia.
It's even worse when a new game is praised for being innovative for a feature that's been implemented by games ten years ago.

Time to beat: As longs as there's still vital signs, it's too early to stop.
 

dotnetbeast

Mood Muzik
Feb 14, 2006
6,189
60
48
Washington D.C.
Gamers Like Me

Gamers that hate brilliant threads like this, dont play games as much, and think that there is someone out to get him everytime they lose in any game.
 

theabyss

No One Here Gets Out Alive
Dec 3, 2005
1,669
9
38
East Coast
The Creative Mapping Freak

Those kind of people who could care less about the game if it wouldn´t ship with some kind of editor to create maps for it.
That would be me. I think I am the only one in the Unreal Community who has never played Rankin online...:lol:
 

Mozi

Zer0 as a number
Apr 12, 2002
3,544
0
0
In the Borderlands..
www.mozidesign.com
The Creative Mapping Freak

Those kind of people who could care less about the game if it wouldn´t ship with some kind of editor to create maps for it.
That would be me. I think I am the only one in the Unreal Community who has never played Rankin online...:lol:

I am Creative Mapping Freak

Sore Losers
Used to see this in Half-Life 2 DM. The one guy that is raping everyone gets killed once and immediately disconnects.
 
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T2A`

I'm dead.
Jan 10, 2004
8,752
0
36
Richmond, VA
Ego Babies -- When doing poorly they will disconnect/spectate and then rejoin to reset their scores so at the end of the game the scoreboard doesn't show their true lack of skills. I've seen this a lot in UT2004. As soon as their net score gets below a certain threshold (-3 or so) they reconnect to go back to 0 in hopes that this time around they'll get a positive net and not look like they suck.
 

Rambowjo

Das Protoss
Aug 3, 2005
5,073
5
38
32
Tapeland
World of Warcraft Addicts

These bastards are constantly thinking about the game. Their entire day is planned around maximizing their login time. These are the people you work with who seem to have no other topic of discussion besides Warcraft. They will tell you over and over about their last Raid in Molten Core, even though you could give less than two sh*ts about both Raids AND Molten Core. They also use leetspeak in everyday speech, mouthing verbal abominations like "Lawl" (lol) and "Pooned" (pwned.) "F*ck this, I'm rolling a Shaman" is a common phrase among these people.

Time to Beat: Everytime they open their goddamn mouths. And please do it violently and indiscriminately.

I don't like gamers who generalize other groups of gamers.
 

JohnDoe641

Killer Fools Pro
Staff member
Nov 8, 2000
5,330
51
48
41
N.J.
www.zombo.com
I hate the gamers who get on a server and think they know how to play the game only to get completely destroyed and all the can say is "no way you could be THAT good" when it's them who severely lack any semblance of skill.