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Old 5th Apr 2000, 08:34 AM   #1
Chand
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How bitchy is this ?!?!?!?! 1 to 10 scale plz...

Ok...this is very offtopic but what the hell, this is the OT forum and I gotta get this outta my chest...

One of my best friends (known the guy for 20+ years) met this girl online...talked for months, they fell in love with each other and yadda yadda... My friend is from Argentina and he already had a plan to move here to the US to work and stuff (he's a 3D modeler/animator)...

So he thought he could kill two birds (using the same trip to get to his girl)...they were gonna get together...they even agreed on moving together eventually if everything worked ok...

So my friend sells all his stuff in argentina to raise some money for a long stay here... sold his computer (kickass rig btw), his amateur radio (very expensive stuff) and basically everything that he wasn't going to need here...

Not only he sold almost all his earthly possesions...
He was gonna stay in CA, but he changed it to AR to be with the girl...
He reserved 2 weeks in a time-share spa kind of thing for him and the girl...
He modified his whole travel plan to be with her...
And of course not to mention the fact that he passed several job offers (including one for the position of 3D modeler at Id Software...yeah, he's THAT good)...passed all that to be with the girl...

He's flying to the US next saturday...
A couple of days ago the girl told him that she 'faced reality' and she had to put things on hold for some undisclosed amount of time until she 'could get her head clear'

Now what the hell... how bitchy is that ? Where are you gonna find a guy that can do these things for her and then show such contempt ? Of course, later women complain that 'there are no good men anymore'...

I gave up trying to understand women long ago... but am I missing THAT much that I thing she's a complete B***** and I find no other explanation ?

If there's any wise sage, with extensive knowledge of the female brain...please enlighten me.

The rest of you nice people that tolerated this rant, please feel free to comment...I'd hate to think that I'm the only one who thinks she's a major B*****

thanks and sorry if this annoyed/perturbed/offended anyone... I had to vent it out 'cos I hate that this had to happen to the person I consider almost my brother...


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Old 5th Apr 2000, 08:50 AM   #2
Sylvester
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Re: How bitchy is this ?!?!?!?! 1 to 10 scale plz...

10
I feel sorry for your friend... such a good guy deserves better.
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Old 5th Apr 2000, 08:55 AM   #3
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Re: How bitchy is this ?!?!?!?! 1 to 10 scale plz...

Your words ring true, Chand.

I am considered an advice-giver and sage amongst the unenlightened, so I'll do my best to do sum up all that I can.

Women are not even worth understanding. They're pretty to look at, but to actually care for one, I learned long ago, is nothing but trouble... so I've pretty much sworn off any relationship. I know it sounds harsh, but in reality women are much more prone to rapid emotional changes than men, and all it ends up doing is crushing men in a horrible way. Avoid them like the plague save for casual sex.

Another thing I learned is that everything ends horribly, and that no happiness can last forever, because it is rejected somehow by the human spirit. We thrive on strife. Learn to appreciate what you have when you have it, because suddenly, abruptly, it will end, and you have no idea when. And when it does end, don't get upset, don't get depressed, don't get mad. Just walk away. Step away from it, because its not worth it. Sever yourself from all emotional ties to anything. Its better to never get betrayed than to have your life crushed beneath the whims of the stupid, ignorant, selfish people.

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Old 5th Apr 2000, 09:52 AM   #4
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Re: How bitchy is this ?!?!?!?! 1 to 10 scale plz...

I've got to reply on this one...

I have a girlfriend for one year now, and I must say, altough there have been some difficulties, it is worth it. We are very happy together.

Maybe this is difficult for some, but when working on a relation, you'll both have to make some sacrifices. A relation won't work if all the sacrificing comes from one side (like with chand's friend).
IMHO the most important thing in a relation is: understanding your partner.
This can take a while (beleave me!) but eventualy, it will make you a happy camper.


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Old 5th Apr 2000, 10:49 AM   #5
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Re: How bitchy is this ?!?!?!?! 1 to 10 scale plz...

I'd have to ask this in all earnesty, Sylvester... how many times have you cheated on her, and vice versa? I know that when I had a girlfriend for about a year, I had cheated on her three times, with two different girls, and that she cheated on me at least twice with the same guy. We both loved each other a whole lot... just people tend to be very, very stupid when dealing with each other. So very few people will never actually cheat. I mean, ****, even priests cheat on God, for Chrissakes.

Relationships are completely meaningless. Even if you have a wonderful relationship with a sweet girl that will be totally faithful to you, she will, at some point, lie to you, either to keep you happy or to protect herself or the relationship. Even your parents told you white lies.

Thus the following is known. A lie is a lie, no matter the severity or depth. All relationships are based on trust. Lies violate trust. Violation of trust results in lack of a true relationship. Any true relationship is based on love, be it platonic or coitial. Ipso facto, there is no such thing as love, and relationships are meaningless. Friendships are pointless. Marriage is a sham. And worst of all, the "human spirit" is a goddam joke.
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Old 5th Apr 2000, 11:25 AM   #6
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Re: How bitchy is this ?!?!?!?! 1 to 10 scale plz...

Come on you guys, some of the fault lies in this friends own doing.

Selling all your stuff to be with someone that he has never met? (I assume he has never met her, even if so it still applies). He jumped in neck deep when he should have juse been testing the water. No matter how well you know someone over email, chat or whatever, its 100 times different face to face. Sounds like he rushed into things and got burned, its really both peoples fault, butit sucks all the same.
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Old 5th Apr 2000, 11:46 AM   #7
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Re: How bitchy is this ?!?!?!?! 1 to 10 scale plz...

Cheating on your partner is the same like cheating with a game...yeah, it can be fun, but if other players find out, they won't play with you anymore. And there is no fun in not being able to play.

I've haven't cheated on her and I trust her that she'll does the same...

Treat others the way you want to be treated...
If everybody did this, the world would be a better place...


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Old 5th Apr 2000, 07:00 PM   #8
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Re: How bitchy is this ?!?!?!?! 1 to 10 scale plz...

she chickened out, which is acceptable, but the whole seemingly "all or nothing" way this went out was kinda dumb on both their parts for someone you have never seen. I don't care how well you know someone online, thats so totally different than real life. I was able to keep a relationship with an old girlfriend together for a long time online, despite the fact that we grew into totally different people during the time we were apart.

I don't know. yeah, that was bitchy, but this whole situation sounded mad to begin with.
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Old 5th Apr 2000, 08:49 PM   #9
Andirez
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Re: How bitchy is this ?!?!?!?! 1 to 10 scale plz...

Quiet a story, Chand. I'm feeling sorry for your friend. Maybe he was a bit artless, but than again we all know what love can do to us.

Sylvester, comparing your girlfriend with computergames... now what should we think of that ?

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Old 5th Apr 2000, 08:57 PM   #10
Chand
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Re: How bitchy is this ?!?!?!?! 1 to 10 scale plz...

It's mad indeed... like my own personal story.

Met a girl online, talked for like a year. I'm originally from Argentina too so I came to the IS to see here.

And 2 months after we 'met' we got married. As ****ed up as it sounds. And we couldn't be happier...been married for 10 months now.

And comparing girlfriends/wifes with games...I do it all the time.

My wife, for instance, is like SoF. I love her, she's great and good fun. Thought she's a little bit short and you never know when she's gonna crash or lockup. [img]/infopop/emoticons/icon_smile.gif[/img]

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Old 5th Apr 2000, 08:57 PM   #11
Chand
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Re: How bitchy is this ?!?!?!?! 1 to 10 scale plz...

It's mad indeed... like my own personal story.

Met a girl online, talked for like a year. I'm originally from Argentina too so I came to the IS to see here.

And 2 months after we 'met' we got married. As ****ed up as it sounds. And we couldn't be happier...been married for 10 months now.

And comparing girlfriends/wifes with games...I do it all the time.

My wife, for instance, is like SoF. I love her, she's great and good fun. Thought she's a little bit short and you never know when she's gonna crash or lockup. [img]/infopop/emoticons/icon_smile.gif[/img]

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Old 5th Apr 2000, 10:07 PM   #12
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Re: How bitchy is this ?!?!?!?! 1 to 10 scale plz...

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Old 5th Apr 2000, 11:18 PM   #13
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Re: How bitchy is this ?!?!?!?! 1 to 10 scale plz...

Here's a bit better advice, really.

Indiscretion leads to turmoil.

Be careful how you go about things. Its really just like sex. Never force your way in, just let it come naturally. Honestly, she may have felt bowled over that a guy was going this far for her, and it scared the hell out of her especially since she had never met him.

Personally I don't like meeting people online. I believe its trite. If you have something to say, you say it to my face. That goes for "I love you," too.
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Old 5th Apr 2000, 11:28 PM   #14
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Re: How bitchy is this ?!?!?!?! 1 to 10 scale plz...

Agreed. Starting serious relationships are sketchy to begin with, much less internet relationships.
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Old 6th Apr 2000, 11:26 AM   #15
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Re: How bitchy is this ?!?!?!?! 1 to 10 scale plz...

'She' was probably a 350lb, 4'10" guy with a food-filled beard, coke-bottle glasses & poor personal hygiene.

At least he'll have learned never to trust anything you see on the web...
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Old 6th Apr 2000, 12:27 PM   #16
Bad.Mojo
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Re: How bitchy is this ?!?!?!?! 1 to 10 scale plz...

that's what i was thinking too, but i thought they spoke with other or something
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