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15th Aug 2012, 03:45 AM
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#1 |
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surrealistic mad cow
Join Date: Jul. 8th, 2002
Posts: 11,320
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We haven't had a topic like this in a while...
There is nothing more satisfying than dumping a log. However, for some of us this is a remote possibility as the big job often ends up as some exploded mess on the inside of a toilet bowl. So what's your secret for solid poop ?
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15th Aug 2012, 04:25 AM
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#3 |
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amateur de bière
Join Date: Jun. 14th, 2003
Location: Under a black flag.
Posts: 7,627
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beer helps
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15th Aug 2012, 05:30 AM
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#4 |
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I have balls of Depleted Uranium
![[GU]elmur_fud's Avatar](image.php?s=62268527b1cfef30b937f128c290aeca&u=47919&dateline=1244210325)
Join Date: Mar. 15th, 2005
Location: Waco, Texas
Posts: 2,464
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1 of these will do it and shockingly they taste good.
http://www.worthingtonfoods.com/prod...px?product=279 http://www.worthingtonfoods.com/prod...px?product=214 http://www.worthingtonfoods.com/prod...px?product=269 http://www.worthingtonfoods.com/prod...px?product=368 http://www.worthingtonfoods.com/prod...px?product=415 http://www.worthingtonfoods.com/prod...px?product=372 http://www.morningstarfarms.com/morn...age-links.html Nice and firm but not so hard you chip the bowl when it drops.
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In the original unity of the first things lies the secondary cause of all things, with the germ of their inevitable annihilation. ~ Edgar Allan Poe
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15th Aug 2012, 06:46 AM
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#5 |
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A True American
Join Date: May. 25th, 1999
Location: Tokyo, JP
Posts: 8,557
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Not eating fast food will solve your problem. If you think this is not an option you should kill yourself.
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MySpace | Flickr | LastFM | Google+  When I’m watching the news and my daughter walks in and choose to ask. “Why were all those people on the floor, sleeping, covered in red?” I told her, that they were looking for God, but found religion instead. – De La Soul There he goes. One of God's own prototypes. Some kind of high powered mutant never even considered for mass production. Too weird to live, and too rare to die. -Raoul Duke |
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15th Aug 2012, 07:08 AM
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#6 |
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I have balls of Depleted Uranium
Join Date: Mar. 15th, 2005
Location: Waco, Texas
Posts: 2,464
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INPOOPITABLY
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In the original unity of the first things lies the secondary cause of all things, with the germ of their inevitable annihilation. ~ Edgar Allan Poe
Last edited by [GU]elmur_fud; 15th Aug 2012 at 09:48 AM. |
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15th Aug 2012, 09:46 AM
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#7 |
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Baconstrips
Join Date: Aug. 7th, 2012
Location: Tacoma, Wa
Posts: 30
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Cheese. Always cheese.
It's like firing a torpedo from a Virginia Class submarine. Swift and deadly.
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15th Aug 2012, 10:11 AM
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#8 |
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United Kingdom is not a country.
Join Date: Feb. 20th, 2000
Location: Bucks, England - Nowhere near Europe
Posts: 4,646
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15th Aug 2012, 11:50 AM
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#9 |
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Sparkle Magic
Join Date: Sep. 16th, 2004
Posts: 1,820
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It's rather retarded to think you have to eat something special to poop normally. All you have to do is eat a balanced diet, not some processed empty promise in a box.
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74 68 65 20 66 75 63 6b 20 79 6f 75 20 6c 6f 6f 6b 69 6e 67 20 61 74 3f |
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15th Aug 2012, 12:39 PM
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#10 |
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No One Here Gets Out Alive
Join Date: Dec. 3rd, 2005
Location: East Coast
Posts: 1,606
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Sleep!
Eat, go to sleep, wake up, drink coffee (important!), wait about 2 hours, then take a dump. Good poop has to ripen. Def.: ripe: ...fully grown and developed ...brought by aging to full flavor or the best state Last edited by theabyss; 15th Aug 2012 at 07:44 PM. Reason: Thanx [GU]elmur_fud |
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15th Aug 2012, 07:40 PM
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#11 | |
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I have balls of Depleted Uranium
Join Date: Mar. 15th, 2005
Location: Waco, Texas
Posts: 2,464
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Quote:
__________________
In the original unity of the first things lies the secondary cause of all things, with the germ of their inevitable annihilation. ~ Edgar Allan Poe
Last edited by [GU]elmur_fud; 16th Aug 2012 at 08:53 AM. |
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16th Aug 2012, 02:59 AM
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#12 | |
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Offensive mode!
Join Date: Apr. 23rd, 2000
Location: Peking Eend.
Posts: 5,428
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Quote:
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 I can smell your ausfahrts.. bring DeeperShade
.. back to life! |
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16th Aug 2012, 08:59 AM
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#13 | ||
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Aneurysm
Join Date: Dec. 14th, 2010
Location: Portugal
Posts: 289
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Quote:
Quote:
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16th Aug 2012, 09:40 AM
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#14 |
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Das Protoss
Join Date: Aug. 3rd, 2005
Location: Tapeland
Posts: 4,807
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My diet is not the secret.
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16th Aug 2012, 10:49 AM
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#15 | |
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United Kingdom is not a country.
Join Date: Feb. 20th, 2000
Location: Bucks, England - Nowhere near Europe
Posts: 4,646
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Quote:
rip·en (rpn) To make or become ripe or riper; mature. See Synonyms at mature.
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16th Aug 2012, 12:25 PM
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#16 | |
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I have balls of Depleted Uranium
Join Date: Mar. 15th, 2005
Location: Waco, Texas
Posts: 2,464
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Quote:
Someday I hope to be able cause a mass exodus from the bathroom merely by the sound and anybody who enters the bathroom for the next hour should be immediately caused to seriously consider just how bad they really need to go. Of course the holy grail of defecation is to be able to cause a has-mat situation at the sewage treatment facility! To cause the national guard to evacuate the area! To rot and decay anything living downwind from your rectum! Children caught in small eddies off the main swath of carnage would have there growth stunted! Just a small whiff would ruin the taste of food for a month! Faux News would proclaim Armageddon! We're talking serious ****.
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In the original unity of the first things lies the secondary cause of all things, with the germ of their inevitable annihilation. ~ Edgar Allan Poe
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16th Aug 2012, 12:56 PM
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#17 |
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amateur de bière
Join Date: Jun. 14th, 2003
Location: Under a black flag.
Posts: 7,627
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I just did a ****.
It worked. |
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16th Aug 2012, 02:22 PM
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#18 |
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Edge of forever
Join Date: Dec. 10th, 2000
Location: in a stream of stars
Posts: 18,540
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Stop eating your cat's food Zur.
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16th Aug 2012, 06:40 PM
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#19 |
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These Exiled Years
Join Date: Nov. 3rd, 2001
Location: NaliCity, MI
Posts: 4,704
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My secret for solid poo? Just like separate pieces of Play-Doh, just scoop it all up squeeze them together into one solid log...
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Nali City's official AMmayhem <AMmayhem> howdy all * Rukee waves <AMmayhem> that had better been all 5 fingers... <Rukee> oh-you thought I was waving my hand, okay. <AMmayhem> well, someone your age, all the wrinkles blend together, making it hard to decipher what part of the body is being waved..... <AMmayhem> o_O <MassChAoS> ouch <Rukee> owned :P |
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20th Aug 2012, 04:23 PM
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#20 |
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Registered User
Join Date: Feb. 2nd, 2002
Posts: 2,367
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my secret for solid poop is dehydration
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Support Kim Jong-un who just lost his father |
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