Tell me a game, and I will hate on it for you.

[Trynant]

Originally Posted by NeoNite

beast

Beast is a terrible game. I had to look it up on google because it's an old piece of crap that looks like an old piece of crap and plays like one (although I wouldn't know for sure because I'm not touching this thing with a 10-foot pole). One year after Beast came out, Super Mario Bros would be released. One year is apparently all it took to advance from atari graphics/gameplay to NES graphics/gameplay. Wow.

[Trynant]

Originally Posted by Jacks:SmirkingRevenge

Half-Life 2

Half-Life 2 is a terrible game. I've seen rail shooters with less linearity than this overrated trash. After wandering around a stupid city level you're given the wonderful treatment of SEWER LEVEL EXTRAGANZA. Environments are bland and repetitive, the weapons are banal with a few exceptions (gravity gun rises from crap to mediocrity). Also this game is terrible alone for heralding the streamlined-to-**** singleplayer FPS model that terrible games like Modern Warfare brought to even more popularity. Also Steam. LOLOLOLOLOL

[NeoNite]

codename iceman

[Mozi]

Originally Posted by Trynant

GTA 4 is a terrible game. Everything it does the Grand Theft Auto 3 games did more of and did better. You're stuck in one pitiful city and everything is far more scripted than the GTA 3 games. Was the intent to make GTA 4 feel like a more polished experience? It failed. The series was a least a little fun when you could do crazy **** with your cars and helicopters and jets and jetpacks but 4 got turned into this muddy, stupid brown mess of doldrum. And whoever put the 'friends bug you on your crappy cellphone' in the game ****ed up royally.

Yeah I hate the game too, just wanted to see what you would say.

[Mozi]

Guitar Hero/Rock Band

[Trynant]

Originally Posted by Mozi

Yeah I hate the game too, just wanted to see what you would say.

Just because I'm hating on games doesn't necessarily mean I hate these games. Then again, it doesn't mean I don't hate certain games

Originally Posted by NeoNite

codename iceman

Codename: ICEMAN is a terrible game. First off, I never heard of it until now which is not a good sign. Second off, it's a point-and-click adventure game, and all point-and-click adventure games are terrible games that hang on their 'stories' for any semblance of enjoyment. Graphics have not aged well at all, and for that matter adventure games haven't aged well at all either.

Originally Posted by Mozi

Guitar Hero/Rock Band

Guitar Hero/Rock Band are terrible games. The gameplay consists of listening to hit-or-miss (mostly miss) songs and pressing buttons/thwacking pads on an overpriced peripheral to what is little more than a Simon Says variant. The games came out at such a frequent rate it makes Modern Warfare blush, and the whole music-gaming genre got dismissed as the fad that it was as a result. Also, if you get into these terrible games, say goodbye to your wallet and any storage space you had free.

[Firefly]

Originally Posted by Trynant

As much as I would like to hate on it, moldy grouse as far as that definition as concerned is not a game. And as originally stated, this is a thread about me hating on games.

never mind

[BlackFish]

Doom

[Kantham]

All Point Bulletin.

[SleepyHe4d]

DarkSpore, Diablo 3 and Xenoblade Chronicles

[Firefly]

Cyber Empires
Fantasy Empires
Dark Legions
Blood Omen: Legacy of Kain
Eternal Darkness: Sanity's Requiem
Metal Gear Solid: The Twin Snakes
Too Human
X-Men: Destiny

[SleepyHe4d]

lolwtf the tags, why me out of everyone here?

u mad?

[Trynant]

Originally Posted by SleepyHe4d

lolwtf the tags, why me out of everyone here?

u mad?

Don't look at me, I only put the first tag on there.

Anyways, I have crap to do until this afternoon, and then, the hatred shall resume.

If you can't wait that long, just assume I said game such-and-such was terrible because of reasons.

[-Jes-]

Originally Posted by Firefly

Cyber Empires
Fantasy Empires
Dark Legions
Blood Omen: Legacy of Kain
Eternal Darkness: Sanity's Requiem
Metal Gear Solid: The Twin Snakes
Too Human
X-Men: Destiny

Silicon Tights?

Cyber Empires was awesome fyi.

[Firefly]

Originally Posted by -Jes-

Silicon Tights?

Cyber Empires was awesome fyi.

I wondered if anyone was going to get the cross reference to the other thread

[HugoMarques]

Legend of Zelda: Ocarina of Time

[NeoNite]

Bart vs. the space mutants

[Trynant]

Originally Posted by BlackFish

Doom

Doom is a terrible game. It's supposedly credited for being the first real FPS (despite being a ripoff of Wolfenstein), meaning it's of course the first real piece of **** that we can blame for the current trent of **** FPS's out today. Wander around an ugly set of rooms finding skittle-color-coded key cards, shoot the dumbest looking monsters from Hell I've ever seen, and constantly wish there was a jump button when a level makes you bump against a chest-high wall.

Originally Posted by Kantham

All Point Bulletin.

All Points Bulletin is a terrible game. It's so terrible that it is notable for having the shortest lived play period of any MMO. It's THAT bad. It's a wannabe Saints Row 3, except now with the ****ty idea that you should add MMO mechanics to a sandbox. YEAH THAT WILL MAKE THE GAME MUCH MORE FUN WOOHOO.

Originally Posted by SleepyHe4d

DarkSpore

DarkSpore is a terrible game. It's like Diablo, except unlike Diablo in DarkSpore you move at the pace of a snail mutated to move slower than a normal snail. Maybe that was the point, since your character looks no better than a mutated snail since you play the reject creatures from the real Spore (dick monsters look better than these ****ups). You get to play three of them at once to hide the fact that you're playing characters with very little functionality compared to any sensible ARPG.

Diablo 3

Diablo 3 is a terrible game. First off, it's official name is Diablo III, BECAUSE EVERY GAME IS BETTER WITH ROMAN NUMERALS IN THE TITLE AMIRITE? Second off, the game moves like molasses, barely outpacing DarkSpore in some weird ARPG Special Olympics. Your only reprieve is that the skills you're given can move you around, except you only get to pick a handful of them at any time rather than being able to unleash your full repertoire. Worst of all is this weird attachment to an archaic loot system that completely goes against any value in the added "difficulties" (it's ****ing new game+ Blizzard) because you're fed this mixed message of Skinner's Box rewards r gud and that mastery of the game is needed, but only slightly since you can just get better loot. Oh, you thought I was going to talk about the online-only play or the real-money auction house? Puh-leaze, like I need such an easy target to hate on.

Xenoblade Chronicles

Xenoblade Chronicles is a terrible game. Oh? I was talking about Skinner's Box for Diablo 3? Xenoblade blows D3 out of the water. This game makes you feel like a lab rat more than any other game of this generation. I actually think WoW is more tame in its treadmill questing system. And as ****ty as WoW is, at least it let you control your character. Xenoblade is a watered-down FFXII where you pray your AI team mates are not dopes and will actually use their skills in an intelligent manner. As if. Oh, there's also a story or something. Whatever. It's a JRPG. JRPG stories are **** (well, all games for that matter).

Originally Posted by Firefly

Cyber Empires

Cyber Empires is a terrible game. It's made by some random company called Silicon Knights and as far as I can see (because like hell would I actually play this piece of crap), it's like a strategy warfare boardgame without the benefits of being a boardgame and all the downsides of being a videogame. Point and click management fest everywhere. Is there even a game under this ****ty interface? I don't want to know.

Fantasy Empires

Fantasy Empires is a terrible game. It's made by some mediocre company called Silicon Knights and as far as I can see it's basically Cyber Empires except instead of being a crappy sci-fi setting they went for an even worse fantasy setting. There's this dumb wizard who manages stuff for you and puts his wrinkly hands all over your screen. The interface is somehow even worse than Cyber Empires because they took any sense of ease-of-use out the window and made every button (there are a lot of stupid buttons) an cryptic icon instead of text. Looking at this and Cyber Empires makes me almost think those newfangled Paradox grand strategy games are not terrible. Almost.

Dark Legions

Dark Legions is a terrible game. It's made by some banal company called Silicon Knights that continues their glorious trend of thinking that videogames are board games and take archaic, Avalon Hill-esque tabletop rulesets and turns them into something worse. I haven't even played this game and I can tell it's a ****ty fantasy jerk-off wannabe boardgame that can't even figure out how the **** you use a computer make games.

Blood Omen: Legacy of Kain

Blood Omen: Legacy of Kain is a terrible game. It's made by some ratty company called Silicon Knights, and at first I thought this was some ****ty spinoff of Soul Reaver, but it turns out it's actually a predecessor. Oh, great, instead of attempting to learn from Soul Reaver this is a game that gets to start as a brand new IP like some freshly sprung turd. You can tell it's still Silicon Knights because there's this terrifyingly obtrusive interface. You could say that SK has stepped up because their game looks less liken a boardgame, but boy am I glad I never looked at this game until now. Thanks guys.

Eternal Darkness: Sanity's Requiem

Eternal Darkness: Sanity's Requiem is a terrible game. It's made by some overrated company called Silicon Knights, and this is their SUPER WONDERFUL (cult) HIT. What a wash. The gameplay is a clunky mess with a small reprieve that if you play terribly the game rewards you by turning the volume down, so you at least have one of your senses saved from this mess. Of course, it would be intelligent to reward the player with all of these special insanity effects that make the game slightly stand out instead of using the only defining feature of the game as a punishment mechanism, BUT WHY THE **** WOULD YOU DO THAT?

Metal Gear Solid: The Twin Snakes

Metal Gear Solid: The Twin Snakes is a terrible game. It's made by some sellout company called Silicon Knights, and the premise is that you are a masochist who wants to play more of the terrible game Metal Gear Solid, EXCEPT WITH HIGHER DEFINITION (though still not actual high definition). To make you want to play MGS again, they've made Twin Snakes look prettier and added more cutscenes or something that add to an already bloated product. Great.

Too Human

Too Human is a wonderful game. It's made by this godly company called Silicon Knights, and as far as I can tell there is no single flaw that ever arised from this game, except that those Satanic minions at Epic Games RUINED THE BEST GAME OF ALL TIME. Well, at least Epic tried to do that, but could they really succeed in stopping the pinnacle of gaming that is Too Human? Of course not. Why the **** would you ask me to hate on such a sublime experience? You really are low people. Now excuse me while I fellate Denis Dyack.

X-Men: Destiny

X-Men: Destiny is a terrible game. It's made by some washed-up company called Silicon Knights, who previously made THE BEST GAME EVER AND SHOULD NEVER BE JUDGED EVER. That makes X-Men: Destiny extra terrible because whatever it tries to be it can't not be terrible compared to Too Human. After all, where can you go once you've reached the peak of excellence but down? X-Men: Destiny is a terrible game if only because it's not Too Human. I don't even need to bother talking about any actual content of the game because there's nothing left in my hollow, hateful existence to enjoy when I've seen Providence in Too Human and had to leave to return to this world of terrible games.

Originally Posted by HugoMarques

Legend of Zelda: Ocarina of Time

Legend of Zelda: Ocarina of Time is a terrible game. But can you blame it really? The game was so hyped up before release and so covered in nerd nostalgia spunk afterwards that whatever is underneath those grimy, rosetinted goggles could not possibly compare to expectations except Too Human. Anyways, the gameplay consists of wandering around some rehashed land (EXCEPT IN THREE DEE) and doing the exact same damn thing you did for the past Zelda games. Go to dungeon, solve puzzle, get loot, kill boss, get macguffin, rinse, lather, repeat. Do this nine or ten times along with slogging through lots of minigames and you have the game Nintendo has been making for the past 25 years.

Originally Posted by NeoNite

Bart vs. the space mutants

Bart vs. the Space Mutants is a terrible game. It takes you back to the past, to the ****ty games that suck ass. I'd rather have a buffalo take a diarrhea dump in my ear. I'd rather eat the rotten asshole of a roadkill skunk and down it with beer.

[akstylish]

Legends of Equestria

[Vaskadar]

Originally Posted by akstylish

Legends of Equestria