Illiterate catlogue delivery peeps cant read my no junk mail sticker what should I do

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What counter tactics should be inflicted on these spam delivering scum?

  • Phone the catalogue company and complain

    Votes: 12 44.4%
  • Try to pass off maltese as a rottweiler using black\brown paint and possibly an air compressor

    Votes: 11 40.7%
  • Try to disguise a man eating animal as the mailbox

    Votes: 9 33.3%
  • Sesame street stickers on the sign in the hope of them developing an interest in the alphabet

    Votes: 9 33.3%
  • Electrify that mailbox and see if they understand electricty as well as they do the written language

    Votes: 17 63.0%
  • Give them a proctology with the offending material.

    Votes: 11 40.7%
  • Crush the mailbox with the car and say at least I won the battle if not the war

    Votes: 8 29.6%
  • Beat them with a dictionary untill they have some idea that it has other uses

    Votes: 11 40.7%
  • Try to paint the mailbox with chameleon paint

    Votes: 10 37.0%
  • You didnt think of this one frag. Ive posted it below

    Votes: 8 29.6%

  • Total voters
    27

El JuaKo

Fear the Mariachi
Dec 13, 2003
346
0
0
40
in barcelona we put a recycle bin next to the mailbox and labeled it as "commercial mail goes here" it was kind of effective but you still get some pamphlets.
most of these guys want to get rid of the stuff they carry so they can get paid
 

Danja

New Member
Mar 16, 2008
120
0
0
Near Toronto (Canada)
I think that you should spend several months ****ing with them by moving your mailbox, putting it against different walls, turning it around so that the slot is blocked, etc. After this goes on for a while the Mailman, while not scared, will feel uneasy about coming to your place. This is when you can move on to phase two.

Follow them home and raid their trash to find their name and the names of anybody they live with. Leave, on top of your mailbox, a letter addressed to him perfectly but inside just leave a blank piece of parchment with half of a sentence written down. After that leave pictures of their front door and other similarly personal messages in your mailbox.

Keep this going for about a year and then one day put your mailbox on their front door while they're away delivering mail. Set up a webcam across the street and watch them flip their **** at the haunted mailbox.
 

Hadmar

Queen Bitch of the Universe
Jan 29, 2001
5,557
42
48
Nerdpole
Dig a big hole and hide. The next time someone stuffs spam into your mailbox yell THIS IS SPAM ASSASSIN before kicking him down the hole.
 

FragTastic

Hitscanned
Nov 10, 2008
113
0
0
Still riding the "Zombie Horse"
No Go Postal option? Pffft.

lol so true i totally missed that one :eek:
Postal (the game) is illegal in australia. Im using that as my defence lol. Ive literally never played it. Good answer though :D Also the reason I left "you didnt think of this one frag" as the bottom option in the poll ;)
[EDIT] Sorry Al i got mailbox pics but havent dl camera yet
 

FragTastic

Hitscanned
Nov 10, 2008
113
0
0
Still riding the "Zombie Horse"
lol i should have gone with the american spelling "catalog". catalogue didnt fit in too well. I had trouble with space with both topic and poll answers. Paper spam, advertising material shoved in your mailbox, junk mail etc.... Doesnt the reference to a "no junk mail" sticker in the OP say it well enough? ;)
 

Peavey

Rattus Norvegicus
Jul 17, 2001
2,935
1
38
I was going to joke about my cats leaving logs in the litterbox :( I am idiot :shake:
 

Balton

The Beast of Worship
Mar 6, 2001
13,428
118
63
39
Berlin
lol so true i totally missed that one :eek:
Postal (the game) is illegal in australia. Im using that as my defence lol. Ive literally never played it.

dude, you live in Australia. get a nice little redback family to nest in your mailbox and you're set.