The Holiday Spirit Friendship Unification Thread

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Jacks:Revenge

╠╣E╚╚O
Jun 18, 2006
10,065
218
63
somewhere; sometime?
ok wanktards, things in the world have been super bitter lately. we could wallow in it, or we could take a chance to remind our fellow brothers and sisters how much we love 'em. remember, that Dutch black Saint guy is watching to see who is naughty and who is nice. so in this age of strife and tribulation, at least we can always come together and remember the binds that tie us: our mutual hatred for Muslims.

MURRY HOLIDAYS URRBODY!
YES, EVEN THE JEWS!

ukf9ui5.jpg


[m]https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=2vF3cRi8bkA[/m]
 

Jacks:Revenge

╠╣E╚╚O
Jun 18, 2006
10,065
218
63
somewhere; sometime?
I'll lay down some hot, spicy chocolate logs for y'all to snack on ;)

[screenshot]http://jackielopina.files.wordpress.com/2011/12/oreo-peppermint-truffles-008.jpg[/screenshot]

or should I squirt you a cup of warm, chalky liquid?

YE80t7u.jpg


remember that's

  • 1 glass heavy cream nog
  • 1-3 shots of rum/bourbon/whiskey/brandy
  • dash of nutmeg
  • dash of cinnamon
feel free to stir with the cinnamon stick and leave it in there.
you could also substitute a candy cane for stirring and flavor if you're using peppermint schnapps.
 

Hermskii

www.Hermskii.com
Apr 13, 2003
875
3
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Houston
Hermskii.com
Please accept with no obligation, implied or implicit, our best wishes
For an environmentally conscious, socially responsible, low stress,
non-addictive, gender neutral, celebration of the northern hemisphere
summer solstice, practiced within the most enjoyable traditions of the
religious persuasion of your choice, or secular practice of your choice,
with respect for the religious/secular persuasions and/or traditions of
others, or their choice not to practice religious or secular traditions
at all. And a fiscally successful, personally fulfilling and medically
uncomplicated recognition of the generally accepted calendar year 2014,
but not without due respect for the calendars of choice of other cultures
whose contributions to society have helped make our country great, and
without regard to the race, creed, colour, age, physical ability,
religious faith, sexual orientation or choice of computer platform and
operating system of the wishee.

By accepting this greeting, you are accepting these terms:

1. The greeting is subject to clarification or withdrawal.
2. It is freely transferable with no alteration the original greeting.
3. It implies no promise by the wisher to actually implement any of the
wishes for her/himself or others.
4. It is void where prohibited by law, and
5. It is revocable at the sole discretion of the wisher.

This wish is warranted to perform as expected with the usual application
of good tidings for a period of one year or until the issuance of a
subsequent holiday greeting, whichever comes first, and warranty is
limited to replacement of this wish or issuance of a new wish at the
sole discretion of the wisher.

Disclaimer:
The color blue has not intentionally been omitted from this season.
Blue has never applied for recognition as an official colour of this
particular holiday observance and I neither oppose nor endorse the
use of the color blue.
 

[GU]elmur_fud

I have balls of Depleted Uranium
Mar 15, 2005
3,148
31
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Waco, Texas
mtbp.deviantart.com
How The Angel Got On Top Of The Christmas Tree
By
Michael T. B. Pulley
(Adapted from a short story by a anonymous author who adapted it from a short story by Baxter Black. All set to the rhyme scheme of twas the night before Christmas...loosely anyway.)


Twas December 24th up at the North Pole,
and Santa was quite close to going postal.
The elves were on strike,
the shop was a mess,
the place twas an utter shambles at best.
Rudolph was out, his nose broke in a fight,
the other reindeer had hangovers from drinking all night.
Even Santa himself was a disgrace to behold;
the crumbs in his beard were fifteen days old.
He was greasy and smelly and his breath was scary,
cause Mrs. Clause had run off, with the Tooth Fairy.
To top it all off, as if things couldn’t get worse,
they’d hauled Santa’s head mechanic, off in a hearse,
after the slay had been totaled by a Gnome on a binge.
So twas the Angel of Christmas on which things would hinge.
For Santa had sent her… hell a quarter past three,
to go out and cut down the mightiest tree.
A tree so majestic it was inspiring to behold,
One that glittered and glowed as if painted with gold.
Where is she, where is she, where is the little whore!
Santa bellowed out in a monstrous roar.
When suddenly she burst trough the workshop's front door.
Yo fat man, yo fat man, she squealed out in glee,
now where do you want me to stick this fine tree?
Now this Christmas,
note the tree as you pass,
and that perched on the top,
is the Angel,
with the tree,
up its ass.​
 
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