[Old (Funnay) News]Catholic Church On Masturbating

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Synastren

Explodious!
Jun 22, 2001
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Vatican City - Masturbation is like owning a Ferrari and driving only in first gear, a senior Catholic theologian said in an article published Wednesday.

"Driving only in first gear, not only do you prevent the Ferrari expressing its full power, but gradually you wear it out and thereby ruin a masterpiece of technology," Father Giordano Muraro wrote in the magazine Vita Pastorale.

Muraro was responding to a reader who asked whether it was sinful to masturbate in the absence of one's spouse in order to reduce sexual tension.

According to Muraro, while masturbation - the sin of onanism in the bible - is "objectively a serious act, circumstances must be taken into account".

He said it was up to the person involved to "judge the gravity of his deed, in the context of the couple's path to God". - Sapa-AFP


Source

Saw that on MacHall Comics earlier. :D
 

edhe

..dadhe..
Jun 12, 2000
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**waits for tropi to say anything of worth.

The bible says something about casting your seed upon the earth as a sin. God knows why, rest of us don't. Catholic religion also thinks that any act of sex should be contributary to procreation. So, of course, he'd be saying that sex is far better than masterbation, and that wanking off is, basically, a sin... just he said it cooler :)
 

Sam_The_Man

I am the Hugh Grant of Thatcherism
Mar 26, 2000
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I fail to see how a million wasted sperm is so much worse than nine hundred and ninety nine thousand, nine hundred and ninety nine wasted sperm if you're lucky (or unlucky, depending on the circumstances) :)

But yeah, Catholic Cardinals would know all about Ferraris, of course (not sarcasm).
 

Papapishu

我是康
Jun 18, 2001
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As usual, they have got it backwards.
The deal was; the israelits had a social security system that said that if a woman was widowed, her late husbands brother (or closest living male relative) should marry herm because otherwise she might not be able to handle economicaly.
Both parts happy, the brother gets a(nother) wife, the widow gets economic security.
The sin in that case was that Onan, being the brother in question, when ordered to perform his duty to impregnate his late brothers wife, pulled out prematurely, "spilling it on the earth", thus sinning against the law.

The only other thing I can think of would be to "let your limbs be dead towards adultery".
And the bible is still unclear wether masturbation is concidered adultery, which it can't if you're married, can it?
 

D66

Grey Pilgrim
Feb 2, 2000
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So to elaborate,
(and yes I am Catholic)
Even in a Catholic Bible,
The sin of Onan was that of Oathbreaking. Not sexual misconduct.
Heh, I argued this subject just yesterday with a by-the-book Catholic.