"Ladies and Gentlemen, children of all ages! May I direct your attention to the center ring!" shouted the ringmaster clad in his tux and tails as he made a sweeping gesture toward the center of the big top.
Several spotlights focus on the center ring where a large round cage protects the audience from the fearsome lions contained within.
* Taskmaster|PuF, dressed in an all white jumpsuit, every square inch covered in sparkling sequins, steps boldly into the cage.
* Taskmaster|PuF bows to the audience in each direction as flashbulbs light the tent like a hundred firecrackers dancing across the panarama of wide-eyed children eating their cotton candy and popcorn.
* Taskmaster|PuF flashes a wide smile to the crowd as he snaps the business end of his cured leather whip near one of the large apricot colored lions.
"Ooohs" and "Aahhs" emit from the excited crowd as the king of the jungle leaps gracefully from the tarnished metal stool he was perched on, across a large empty expanse and onto another metal stool.
* Taskmaster|PuF barks an order at another seemingly tame lion, and with an unseen hand signal, the beast opens wide his maul and with large, white fangs exposed lets out an awesome roar.
"Whoa... you need some Listerine!" jokes Taskmaster|PuF into his microphone to scattered laughter from the gathered specators.
* Taskmaster|PuF wheels a pair of large metal hoops into the center of the cage. A pair of the large jungle cats move to their appointed positions on cue.
* Taskmaster|PuF looks into the crowd and catches the eye of some friends, whom he scored free tickets for, and recognizes them as CHRYSt, BillyBadButt and Tykeal! He flashes two thumbs up, al la Mike Meyers.
* Taskmaster|PuF turns his attention back to the metal hoops and turning a dial on each lites the hoops in a blaze of burning gas! The flames dance a seductive dance of orange, yellow and red, with the hypnotic motions of a belly dancer.
In a few scant moments both big cats have jumped through the fiery circles several times and the fires are extinguished.
* Taskmaster|PuF grabs the hoops to wheel them out of the way and severly burns each hand on the red hot metal. He clenches his teeth in pain, but the smile never leaves his face. He glances up at this friends in hopes they didn't notice his total goof up.
* Taskmaster|PuF drags one of the large metal platforms to the front of the cage. The rough metal of the platform ripping at the seared flesh of his hands causing them to bleed.
* Taskmaster|PuF grips the handle of his whip gingerly, now in almost obvious pain, and cracks it loudly for effect. The largest of the lions ambles onto the platform, a gleam of menace in his ferocious eyes.
* Taskmaster|PuF steps up to the lion, feeling the hot breath on his face and smelling the stagnate food in his nostrils. He braces his hands on the upper and lower jaw of the growling animal, and parts the massive mouth.
The crowd cheers (tribute to Bushwhacker) with anticipation of what is about to transpire. Whistles and cat calls add to the chaos of the moment.
* Taskmaster|PuF calls for complete and absolute silence over his microphone.
"The slightest noise could aggitate this lion into an uncontrolled frenzy!" he lied for dramatic effect. The circus band began to play softly at first and then built into a dramatic crescendo.
* Taskmaster|PuF inserts his head into the lion's mouth, as beads of sweat appeared on his forehead. The blood from his shredded palms begens to drip unnoticed onto the Lion's tongue!
* Taskmaster|PuF screams in tremendous pain as the vice-like jaws of the lion clamp down on his neck crushing his windpipe.
* Taskmaster|PuF struggls in vain to free his head from the maul of the strong lion. His hands pull in a futile effort to part the muscular mandibiles, tear the muscles in his hands into tattered strips of flesh agains the ragged fangs.
* Taskmaster|PuF's headless body springs back from the lion's mouth and drops to the floor in a shower of blood spraying around the center ring.
* Taskmaster|PuF's body doesn't last long as the remaining hungry lions joined in the feast of blood.
The horrified audience flees in horror amid wild chaos. Men, women and children run around in dismay like chickens with their heads chopped off.
"Wow man! What a show!" chimed CHRYSt downing the last of his popcorn.
"Killer!" laughed BillyBadButt at his simple pun.
"I would have paid to see that show!" added Tykeal as they trio climbed down the bleachers and exited the tent.
I declare myself to be the self-annointed voice of reason for PuF! Opinions expressed by Taskmaster are not necessarily those of Planet Unreal! /~unreal/ubb/html/smile.gif
[This message has been edited by Taskmaster (edited 02-11-2000).]
