ok ok.
Mitt Romney is so Mormon... how Mormon is he?
Mitt is so Mormon that his foreign policy for Israel will be centered on Jackson County, Missouri.
Mitt is so Mormon that he’ll make the income tax a flat 10% and collect fast offerings to fund Medicaid.
Mitt is so Mormon that he doesn’t do Pilates, he does golden Pilates.
Mitt is so Mormon that if he’s elected the “First Lady” will be known as the “First Wife.”
Mitt is so Mormon that he asks his donors to stack their chairs after fundraising dinners.
Mitt is so Mormon that he refers to expatriates as “apostates” and non-US citizens as “Gentiles.”
Mitt is so Mormon that he’ll rename the "Bureau of Alcohol, Tobacco, and Firearms" the "Word of Wisdom Squad."
Mitt is so Mormon that he’ll assign a friend to every new member of Congress.
Mitt is so Mormon that he thought the debt ceiling was something which could only happen inside of a temple.
Mitt is so Mormon that he doesn’t go on the campaign trail, he goes on “missions.”
Mitt is so Mormon that he won’t deport illegal aliens, he’ll just retroactively disfellowship them.
