HEY! Get your acts together people!

[Loibisch]

"Hey have you already heard it...?" said Steiner (yep :)) as he walked up to Loibisch.

*Loibisch in a sarcastic voice*"What is it now? The mighty Chryst has returned to prove his might with an army of 5000 monkeys assisted by the Gleeptoidians from Gleeptoid VII. And since the Gleeptoidians from IV are always up for a war they are going to join their "brothers" under the command of the mighty tykeal...yeah...don't even think of telling me such a crap again"

"oh you already know..." replied Steiner

silence

"You aren't serious about this, are you?" asked Loibisch, not sure what he should think of his friend.
Steiner has been a good friend since the Gleeptoidian war 34 years ago and it wasn't only one time Steiner had saved Loibisch's a$$ and vice versa.

"You think I would be lying about this?"

Loibisch thought of the 53 times his friend had been kidding with him before...
"Nope, I wouldn't" he replied

"You can read it all on the holo console, if you don't trust me of course..."

"Yeah..." said Loibisch in deep thoughts (yeah... :), that's possible - hard to believe, I know)

He ordered another drink for himself and his friend but Steiner said he had to leave so Loibisch had to drink them both...after about the half of his second monkey-poo (of course monkey-poo isn't monkey poo. It's only one of those names only drinks with more than a bearable amount of alcohol in them get (and besides monkey-poo has pretty the same effect on people as monkey poo usually has (or is supposed to have, I haven't tried it)))...ok, so after about the half of his second monkey-poo Loibisch walked up to the holo console and pressed the buttons to navigate through the menu to the news section of the ship. Due to his...uhm, let's say labile...status he missed one or two of the buttons and so he instead ended up in the...err...porn section.

After thoroughly examining the "news" err...he discovered his mistake and navigated to the real imperial-news-you-have-to-know-even-if-they-are-boring-about-90%-of-the-time section. He browsed through the recent events and suddenly stumbled upon a weird story about a "Taskmaster" from a planet called earth. Well this story read a bit funny but Loibisch's head was still clear enough to see what that would mean for the "temporary" peace treaty signed by his master Lord Khaine and the Gleeptoidians of Gleeptoid IV in the year of 0E3F (3647 in the old time system)...

It has been a few years after the great war of 0E3C (3644). The war betweeen the Gleeptoidians and the mighty army of Lord Khaine...the Gleeptoidians were defeated in various battles but managed to disrupt Lord Khaines warp gates shortly after the destruction of Gleeptoid V (the only other planet with an atmosphere in the whole Gleeptoid system). Gleeptoid V had been the least developed planet of the 3 populated Gleeptoidian planets and therefore it had been very easy to destroy it (tribal folks with spears against lasers, you get the point...). After the destruciton of the warp gates the rest of Lord Khaines army was defeated easily (and so LK swore not to do a battle in a galaxy far, far away again, seems like he was wrong).

In the remaining years the Gleeptoidians from Gleeptoid IV (the most developed people in the Gleeptoid system) helped the survivors of the disaster to build up a new existence on Gleeptoid III. They did some terraforming and left the remaining people of (ex-)Gleeptoid V in the jungle of Gleeptoid III. Very helpful...

Today 34 years after the great war of 0E3C (3644) the whole procedure was about to happen again...everything! Loibisch and Steiner were one of the few survivors of the battle of Gleeptoid IV (it wasn't LK's best idea to attack that planet shortly after Gleeptoid V) and so both could tell about the brutality there...but they both didn't want to.

The whole war only because of that genetic experiment...the secret of Taskmaster was in his genes and so - now after Task had appeared on earth - the whole galaxy was after him again...Chryst, Lord Khaine, tykeal...dammit. They all wanted to find the secret why Taskmaster respawned ever and ever again...in his genes lied the secret of immortality. Chryst had aready started some tests (which even involved a whole Taskmaster killing park...) but failed to reveal the secret. Then Taskmaster escaped.

Everything Chryst had left was some of Task's blood (maybe he got it from a nearby wall ;)) and "The idiots guide to cloning", which wasn't that effective. The clones died (which wasn't the purpose of this all) and so Chryst had to go after the only "real" Taskmaster to find out the secret of infraggability...

So the whole galaxy tried to catch him...and now since he had been spotted on earth the battle of Gleeptoid would continue...this time on planet earth.

"Cr@p" Loibisch grumbled before he felt to the ground in front of the console...

Loibisch

Sorry if I have mixed up some of the tenses :(
Constructive criticism welcome :)
I just revealed the secret of Taskmaster in this post, the story can still go where you want it to ;)

[This message has been edited by Loibisch (edited 05-17-2000).]

[Loibisch]

Noone actually knew how Taskmaster could have escaped from the evil, mean, bad, stinking, rotten...uhm...Chryst! ;)
Some people rumored that there was a man called "Wolf Blackstar" who helped him...but there was no proof Wolf helped him. Wolf actually was some kind of a legend throughout the different solar systems. He already worked for 8 out of the 11 current planetary governments though he only accepted hirements which reflected his own plans. Surely a man one had to keep in mind...

The bartender did a gesture and suddenly Loibisch was carried away by two mean looking men who brought him to his lodgings (they already knew where...) where he could sleep over his drunkenness.

Loibisch

I forgot to mention Wolf in my first post and since he is definately one of the better writers here I didn't want to miss him in my story :)

[This message has been edited by Loibisch (edited 05-17-2000).]

[Wolf Blackstar]

2235 hours
Earth Orbit
U.S.S. Dragon's Bane

"STUMP!!!! How can you watch that crap!!! Turn that thing off!"

"huh....."

"Corporal Stump, turn that crap off and report to your duty station! That show's nothing but shameless endorsements of household products. It's more worthless than monkey dung."

"Yes, my lord." The corporal switches the holovision set off and runs for the door.

"Television is so hacked up these days." mutters Wolf as he walks back onto the bridge.

The bridge officers snap to attention.

"Report."

"Sir, it seems our position has been compromised - one of those alien vessels was able to get a reading on our energy signature and they are now tracking us."

"Drop the cloaking devices, then. Dump the cloaking device energy directly into shields and weapons.

"Sir, plasma accelerators are at full charge."

"Excellent" says Wolf. "Have the gunnery crew stand by for immediate action."

"It also seems, my lord, that the aliens - though comprised of two independent factions - have effectively placed themselves on CHRYSt's sides and are now in posistion to attack Lord Khaine's fleet."

"Well, then we'll need to make it a fair fight - Move the fleet into position alongside Khaine's starship formation. And open the comm frequencies - I'm expecting an important message from him any second now."

"Done, my lord."

The Dragon's Bane decloaks. Flanked by several heavy cruisers and a full destroyer escort, as well as tight formations of Wolverine and Patriot heavy fighters, it kicks its massive sublight drive into full power and pulls alongside LordKhaine's flagship.

Wolf turns to the tac ops director on the bridge. "Any word from our assassin yet?"

"No sir. Last update, she had successfully infiltrated the enemy flagship, and was somewhere on Deck 16. She hasn't been compromised yet, either....the mission is still active."

"Keep me posted."

"Roger that."

Wolf paces back and forth on the bridge of his warship, his mind racing through combat maneuvers and weapons engagement possibilities.

He looks out the viewscreens at the opposing forces and smiles.

"Damn, I love my job."

[Zaccix]

Meanwhile, the 707th were preparing....

"Hertston, Joker. Where are those damn cookies?"

"They're coming sir".

"A Squadron Commander, and I can't even get a decent bite to eat before battle", thought Zaccix as he continued to tune the undercarriage of his Shroud. Ever since the call from LordKhaine, he had been anxious to get into a good scrap, but at the same time wondered exactly what this whole battle was really about.

Was there an ulterior motive? Was he suddenly going to discover a twist in the tale? Why did Taskmaster have the uncanny ability to respawn? All these thoughts rushed through his mind when he was abuptly interrupted by Joker.

"Catch".

"Uh?"

As Joker threw the cookies to him, Zaccix thought about scolding him for disrespect, but was still half-deep in thought to worry about protocol. Besides, Joker was a fine pilot and the atmosphere was informal anyway.

"What's the story upstairs?", Zaccix asked Theman.

"Still no word from the boss" came the reply.

"Hmm".

The 707th were game to try out the Shroud stealth fighters in battle. These ships had a fearful reputation, and those spectral shields were a powerful asset, even with the relative lack of firepower when compared to the Phoenix or the state-of-the-art Wolverine.

However, the only game the 707th were now playing was that of the waiting type. It had been a while since LordKhaine's instruction to prepare for battle, and that while seemed to only get longer.


http://www.planetunreal.com/images/bullet2.gif
=Z==A==C==C==I==X=

[LordKhaine]

2400hours
Earth Orbit
The flag ship of Lord Khaine's fleet, "The Hatred", Heavy Battle ship

"All men, battle stations" screamed the tannoy

This way and that men ran to there jobs and ships.

In the middle of all this chaos the 707th Silver dragons and the 673th Black Fangs were prepared for launch. Several large carrier's were also ready for launch. The last carrier was still being loaded. The awe inspiring site of a 100 ton Daishi heavy assault mech could be seen moving into the hold of the carrier. Around it smaller mechs moved into the hold.

"Captain, move the fleet alongside Wolf's, assist his ships in the attack".

"As you command my lord" reply the captain

Khaine turned to his ship, a new Malice class heavy attack fighter. Its sleek body hinted at truely fearsome abilitys. He climbing into the ship and prepared for launch.

"Zaccix, are you're Dragons ready?" He spoke though the secured com link.

"Yes my lord, we are ready for launch at you're request"

"Excellent work", said Khaine, he switched the channel to the Fangs com channel.

"Commander Loibisch, are you're Fangs prepared for launch?"

"Of course my lord, we are ready for launch at you're command" said Loibisch, his chrome helmet glinted in the light of his cockpits many flashing lights.

"Good work commander"

The last carrier finished loading.

"All units in force alpha cloak and launch, regroup at nav point 1, we cannot be detected while cloaked" transmitted Khaine to the attack wing.

*He was telling the truth, his fleet had far supiorier cloaking systems to those of his enemys, the only draw back of the cloak was that the huge power drain and that the cloak took a full 5 minutes to activate.

The first ships to take off where the Dragons, there ships totaly disappearing from view as they left. Quickly followed by the Fangs and the carriers. Their stealthed ships headed towards earth, undetected.

"If they think that fleet is important to me, they are deeply mistaken. It is time to ensure that my masters plans come true." said Khaine to himself, as he pressed a selection of buttons in his craft.

"Taskmasters immortal days are numbered"

Back in "The Hatred", a device hidden in the reactor workings started bleeping.....

---------------------------------------------------------------------
Plz take notice of the fact the attack group is stealthed. I have some thing big planed for my next addition to the story ;)

[Loibisch]

This happened straight after my first story
-------------------------------------------

The first thing Loibisch did was simple. He fell onto his bed and slept.................

Second thing he did was as simple as the first. He awoke due to the "yellow alert" siren.

Loibisch slowly got up and started to seek for his clothes soon recognizing that he was still wearing them. Then, still sleepy, he moved to the console in his room bypassing the junk on the floor. He even almost managed to reach it without struggling ...well... almost. After our hero (*cough*) got onto his feet again he finally managed to make his way through the room.

Loibisch sat down and switched the console on. A strange message appeared on the screen..."Updating ESCD Data...Success". He couldn't remember he changed the hardware lately...strange. Fortunately with his new 72.000 rpm HD (thx to Trebux, check it out here (http://dynamic.gamespy.com/~unreal/ubb/html/Forum3/HTML/008942.html). At that state they even managed to get the heat under control, as well as noise emission... ;)) the OS booted in only 4 seconds, crashed and loaded again in the next 4 seconds. Quite normal...

He immediately went to the comm section while opening the status section, balancing a cup of coffee with his nose and scratching his head at the same time(whow!). He read over the status report and soon after he ace of LordKhaine appeared on his screen. He looked a bit absent but that was surely only deceiving...

"Later", he said. "Gather your squadron immediately...we don't have enough time"
"What's going on?" said Loibisch but LordKhaine had already disconnected, leaving a message on the screen to read #434578 for further commands.

So Loibisch activated the text-to-speech engine and gathered his stuff - including his mobile comm. He then immediately headed for the hangar.
While he was on his way he put on the comm and activated the transmission. The transparent screen slided in front of his eyes (remember Outcast?).

A nice, female voice (obvious :), all of those voices are female) started to speak.
"Now reading #434578 -
2325 hours - 0E5E (3678)
Location: Earth Orbit
Yellow alert permission given by LordKhaine"
Loibisch listened, still making his way to the hangar.

"We have reached earth orbit 4 hours ago. We're currently facing the fleet of Chryst. He is backed up by Gleeptoidians from both *cough* developed Gleeptoidian planets..."
Dammit, seemed like those from Gleeptoid IV had become a bit faster in the last 30 years...
"...the fleet of the Gleeptoidian IV'ers seems uncomplete though."
Loibisch smiled and mentally stroke the last entry he had made of the Gleeptoidians.
"An issue we surely have to deal with is the size of the enemy fleet. Since Chryst gathered the Gleeptoidian forces his fleet is...uhm...huge, make that gigantic. Our fleet has still the edge though due to our cloaking system."
Loibisch smiled again
"It seems like a person called Wolf Blackstar..."
Loibisch had to gulp...
"...is backing us up on this operation. His fleet is much smaller than the Gleeptoidians', but his fighters are well known for their skill. It seems like the field is even."

This couldn't be true...

The voice continued:
"Order transmission follows:
We have to prepare for attack of Chrysts fle...xchrptf" the voice comm died.
"Dammit, to hell with this stuff" Loibisch attempted to grap his comm but suddenly the voice was there again.
"Order Transmission follows:
Status changed to red alert. We have the edge and we don't want to lose it. All pilots are called upon getting to their ships."
on my way thought Loibisch as he entered lift 21 to the hangar.
"Squadron Commanders: make sure your squad is ready for action, we need it. As soon as you receive further information proceed with mission.
Transmission end."

"They're always [i]very[/] exact when it comes to mission objectives", grumbled Loibisch. Suddenly he recognized Zaccix, leader of the 707th Silver Dragons next to himself.
"Yull", said Zaccix
"Hi Zaccix...did you hear #434578?"
"Yep, just finished"

Then the doors opened and Loibisch left to hangar 5 to the Fangs. Zaccix left in the opposite direction heading for hangar 2.
Loibisch turned around and shouted "Hey Zac, lets see who's gonna get more of them"
There was a rivalry between the Fangs and the Dragons as along as they existed. The pilots of the ships we're pretty proud of every kill they had more than the opposite. Zaccix and Loibisch usually made fun of it.
"Yeah. We'll whoop their äss, no chance for you out there"
"We'll see", both had to laugh.
"Cya out there" shouted Zaccix
"You too"

On his way to his squad he met Steiner who was trying to draw the attention of his squad...seemed like he failed a bit, but it was surely funny to watch.
"Cya out there Steiner", said Loibisch passing by to hangar 5.
"We'll show them...", replied Steiner but his attention was already on his squad again.

The remaining stuff was routine. He gathered his clothing, dressed in the cabin. Then he gve orders to the Fangs. Finally he got into his fighter, a 1st class Wolverine.
He hadn't had any time to change the armament of his ship so he was going to fly with his standard equipment.

In the cockpit.
Loibisch pressed some of the buttons and suddenly the cockpit was filled with lights. He wanted to give the sign to start the mission, but a message was blinking on his HUD.

Incoming Transmission
It was LordKhaine.
"Commander Loibisch, are your Fangs prepared for launch?" asked LordKhaine.
"Of course my lord, we are ready for launch at your command" said Loibisch, his chrome helmet glinted in the light of his cockpits many flashing lights.
"Good work commander", transmission ended...

A voice came out of the speakers in the hangar..."All workers in hangar bay 1 to 7 LEAVE HANGAR IMMEDIATELY, repeat..."

From his current position he was able to see the universe...it seemed unreal, but was there. No doubt.
Next thing Loibisch could here through the unicomm channel was LordKhaines voice:
"All units in force alpha cloak and launch, regroup at nav point 1, we cannot be detected while cloaked"

Suddenly after that the 707th Silver Dragons launched their fighters and shot out into space.
Then it was the Fangs' turn.
Loibisch activated the comm.
"Prepare for launch, and proceed as LordKhaine ordered. Group at Nav1"
Then a voice in the cockpit:
"5.....4.....3.....2.....1.....Loibisch set the engines of the Wolverine to full throttle while activating the custom cloaking system. An ear-deafening noise sounded, breaking at the walls of the hangar. The thrust pressed Loibisch into his seat and the whole Fang squadron was shot into space.

Shortly after the carriers followed as well as some other squads of "The Hatred".

"Proceed to Nav1", said Loibisch preparing his ship. He was a bit angry that the crew still wasn't able to give the HUD a save option. So he had to customize it every flight. He sighed as he made his configurations. Full Salvo, Screamer Rockets, a bit more energy to the weapon systems.

Zaccix was on the comm
"I don't know, I don't feel good with such a strange man in my back. I mean, how can we be sure he's helping us?"
Loibisch was pretty sure about Wolf helping "The Hatred". It was Wolf's chance to defeat Chryst. And LordKhaine...Loibisch had to gulp again...then he forgot that idea.
"He will", was Loibisch's only answer.

"Activate warp". It wasn't really needed since Nav1 wasn't far from their current location. It was mainly done due to the cool effect when all ships warped at the same time.

A flash and the ships were gone...

Loibisch

I can't think of your plan LK, so I guess you have to write a bit till I know what to do out there ("new orders

[reg]

[LordKhaine]

Earth orbit
Lord Khaine's attack group

"My lord, we have 3 whole wings of enemy fighters closing" screamed the pilot of the 1st carrier.

"All units stay in formation!, they cannot detect us while we are stealthed" bellowed Lord Khaine

"They are powering up shields and lasers, one of them has a lock on me!" said Joker, pilot of the 707th.

"All units decloak and engage, make sure the carriers get through"

"He's got a lock on me, hes got a lock on me, arrrrrrrrrrrrrggggggghhhhhhhhh, whomph!............."

"We got a wingman down!" shouted Zaccix

The Fangs and Dragons broke formation and engaged the enemy ships. Light flew every where as both sides opened fire. The graceful ships clashed in total silence, there pilots fighting for there very lifes.

"These ships, there Wolf Blackstars!, its an ambush!" said Loibisch, he voice full of panic.

"That bastard betreyed us!"

"Got it in one fools" said Wolf Blackstar, as he and 3 more wings of fighters decloaked and attacked.

"You will regret this for the rest of your short life Wolf!" said Lord Khaine, his voice full of rage

So it was, two of the best forces in the solar galaxy clashed, the most skilled of the skilled, locked to the death.

Zaccix, flew his Shroud with confidence, jinking left and right with the grace of a puma. He had already taken down 5 enemy ships compared to Loibisch's 3.

"Yeeehaaaw!!!, just like in the simulator!" screamed Zaccix

"Zac, watch your 6!" shouted The Joker

"You are mine!" hissed Wolf Black star, as he swooped behind Zaccix, and opened fire with with all his guns.

"Noooooooooooooooooo............" said Zac, as his ship was totaly smashed apart, the remains of it drifting into space

"Oh my god, they killed Zaccix" said the Joker

"You bastards!" screamed Loibisch!

Even as he said it more of Wolfs ships jumped in

"Cut the chatter 707th, we got Torcs inbound!"

"All ships fall back to protect the carriers, take down those torcs, no-one take on Wolf, hes mine!" roared Lord Khaine, his Malice fighter hot off after the trail of Wolf. As he manovered into position, he's hands pressed a selection of flashing buttons in the cockpit.

---------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

The Malice, Heavy Battleship
Alongside The Dragons Bane

"Captain, we are along side the Dragons Bane. Shall we attack?" said the first officer

"Hold here" replyed the captain

"We are not going to attack?"

"No, I have my orders from Lord Khaine himself, we are only to assist Wolf's fleet"

*Mean while in the engine room the device stopped bleeping, and started emitting a high pitched wail.

"Captain, Im reading a strange power fluctuation in the reactor, its......aaaaaaarrrrrrrggghhhhhhh" his voice was cut short by an earth shattering explotion that ripped the huge ship in half, before the secondary explosion detonated, blowing the ship into its billions of pieces.

--------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

The Dragons Bane
Right next to where The Hatred used to be

"Captain, its The Hatred, she's going to....."

The shockwave hit the Dragons Bane, smashing through its shields and causeing critical damage to half the ship.

"DAMAGE REPORT!" bellowed the Captain, as he stood up. The bridge was a mess, severed cables lay everywhere, and half the room was full of fire and smoke.

Corporal Stump got up, his left arm badly smashed and his head bleeding heavily from a deep wound.

"We have reports of damage to all areas of the ship, our shields are down, our engines at only 20% capacity and intial reports place 70% of the crew as casulitys.....boom!..damnit, we just lost the damage report computer!"

"Are the warp drives up?" shouted the Captain, his voice barely heard over the alarms and the crew putting out numerous fires"

"No sir, but we have just eneugh power to cloak the ship!"

"Make it so number one!, patch me through to Wolf at once" bellowed the Captain

"Yes sir!"

--------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

Lord Khaines attack fleet
Earth orbit

"My lord, we need urgent assistance!, "The Hatred" has exploded and cripple the Dragons Bane, half the fleet is damaged" shouted the captain

"What condition is the gleeptoidians fleet in?" asked Wolf, as he manovered his ship for another attack run

"Sir, we havent meet the gleeptoidians yet!"

"WHAT?" bellowed Wolf, he cursed to himself as his concentration sliped and his left shields were stripped by a volley of laser fire.

"It was the Hatred, it just blew up!"

"Curse's, that Lord Khaine is more evil than we thought, all units break off and fall back to the main fleet. I repeat, all units fall back to the main fleet. Lets move it!"

Wolf's fleet disappeared as quickly as it appeared, leaving the remains of Khaine's fleet alone to wonder what had just happened.

"Loibisch, escort the attack group to these co-ordinates, I've transmitted you're orders to you, I'll meet you at nav point alpha #3857, Khaine out....."

Khaine's ship turned and warped after Wolf's fleet.

"You heard him guys, lets move it!" bellowed Loibisch, still in shock from recent events.

-------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

Zaccix's destroyed ship
Drifting towards a strange green planet

Zaccix woke up, he could feel a sharp pain in his left arm, and his head felt like lead. He looked around

"What the...this doesnt look like earth?"

As he rapidly approached the planet, he saw that this planet, was indeed, not earth

He checked his HUD, everything was flashing red on the damage display.

He fliched as a bright red light flashed, acompanyed by a lound alarm.

He could see through the window his ship was starting to glow bright red as he entered the planets atmosphere

"Oh oh, this is gonna hurt"

This ship started violently shaking, Zac tryed to put all power to his engines to manover his landing, through if he had checked first he would have discovered that his engines were still in orbit round earth, many thousands of light years away.

Zac blacked out from blood lose, and his mind drifted back to thoughts of his dream planet, made entirely of chocolate and 7up.........


..............Zac woke up and looked around, he had landed on the planet, and the feeling of pain that covered his whole body told him that he was not only alive, but in one piece. Zac crawled to the hatch and opened it, he stuck his head out and peered about intently.

"What the....."

The air was breathable, and the land looked like a desert, he could see volcanos in the background, smoking away. What got his attention more than that however, was the tall attractive women standing in front of him, wearing some very skimpy and revealing clothes made out of animal skins. She held a spear with a crude flint blade. Behind her he saw several other women, all similarly dressed and cooking what looked like a dinosaur leg over a large fire.

Zaccix smilled

[DSV_Selerox[PuF]]

High Earth Orbit
Assualt H +30 minutes

In a cloaked Reaper Class fighter, Selerox looked on is disbelief at the events unfolding in front of him. "So, the allies have turned on each other? This should make things far easier...".

His hands moved quickly over the controls and a small holo-screen appeared, displaying CHRYSt at his command chair in the his Flagship,

"Selerox, do you have any news

"You're not going to believe this, but our job just became a whole lot easier..."

http://www.planetunreal.com/images/bullet2.gif
PuF (http://puf.cjb.net): Come play dying.

Send articles/rants/editorials to The Soundoff (http://soundoff.cjb.net) and have your say!

[Zaccix]

Meanwhile....

Zaccix looked around this barren landscape that lay before him, thoughts rushing through his mind.

"Where am I? How did I get here? WHY am I here?"

That last thought didn't seem too appropriate, given his present company. Still, these were questions he needed answers to.

"C'mon big boy. We need to get going" said the woman standing in front of him.

"Where?" asked Zaccix.

"You'll find out soon enough" came the reply.

"Who are you?"

"Call me Selena".

In wierd state of shock, pain, and pleasure, Zaccix got up and followed the tribe of women on a journey across the vast sands. The heat was intense, but strangely comfortable.

After what seemed like a lifetime of walking, Zaccix could hear what sounded like civilization. The party approached a huge dune and started to walk up, Upon reaching it's summit, Zaccix saw what could only be described as awesome. Before him lay a city that seemed to spread out forever, surrounded by a massive wall.

"No time for sightseeing" one of the other women in the party said. She looked similar to Selena, but had long dark hair, almost black but not quite, and piercing eyes.

The group walked downhill towards a pair of enourmous gates. Made out of pure gold and decorated with an uncountable number of precious stones, the gates shimmered in the hot sunlight. Selena walked up to a hut that stood to one side of the entrance and appeared to have a conversation with someone inside. Suddenly, the gates opened. It was an amazing sight to see.

As they passed through the gates, Zaccix noticed an old man sitting outside a house. he beckoned to Zaccix to come over to him, and Zaccix acknowledged him, but thought it safer to stay with his present company.

After a few minutes of walking, the party came to a large mansion, surrounded by lush gardens. In the gardens were various animals and birds, some of which Zaccix had never seen before. They went inside and in the hallway stood a man in ceremonial dress. Upon his head was a crown made from coloured feathers and stones, and he wore a long, deep red velvet cape.

"Who are you?" asked Zaccix.

"I am Proclius" answered the man. "Who are you?"

"I'm Zaccix".

"Welcome to Yarken, my city", said Proclius invitingly.

"Yarken?", Zaccix questioned. "Which planet is this?"

"Rock" Proclius answered back. "This has been our home for as long as I can remember".

"How did I get here?"

"You know how you got here. Your spaceship crashed. What you don't know is that you are on the same planet you started out from".

"You mean this is Earth?" exclaimed Zaccix.

"Earth?", Proclius asked. "Well if that is what you call it then yes I suppose so".

Zaccix was still very much mystified. "What happens now?" he asked.

"I would like to offer you residency at my home until the morning, when we shall talk more".

Having obviously nowhere else to go, Zaccix took up Proclius' offer.

"Bjelea, show Zaccix to his quarters".

"Very well" came the reply.

The two went up the central staircase and carried on along a long hallway. They approached a tall blue door made of stone, with a strange marking etched into it".

"These quarters are yours Zaccix" said Bjelea.

Upon going inside, Zaccix felt himself miss a heartbeat. The room looked to him like he always thought paradise would be like. The floor was made of white marble and so too were the pillars which stood near the door and on the other side of the room near the window. There were plants everywhere and the whole room had an airy feel to it.

"Make yourself comfortable" Bjelea said.

"Oh I will!" answered Zaccix with a smile.

As he made his way over to the centrepiece large bed which dominated the room, Zaccix heard a tap on the window that sounded like a stone hitting it. He went over, looked out and saw the same old man he had seen earlier.

"Meet me tonight, outside my house" the man whispered loudly.

"OK I will" replied Zaccix softly.

That night, the whole house came together for a feast that Zaccix enjoyed greatly. Afterwards, he retired to his quarters and upon laying on his bed, almost fell asleep. He then remembered the old man and sharply got up.

A woman then poked her head round the door. It was Selena.

"Goodnight Zaccix" she said with a smile.

"Night", Zaccix replied.

Zaccix waited for a few minutes, then he carefully crept over to the window and opened it as softly and carefully as he could. The distance between his window and the ground below wasn't too great, and he successfully managed to jump down.

He made his way through the city, looking for the old man's house. After some searching, he remembered that the house was right next to the golden gates, and after a few minutes of walking he saw the old man, who was furiously waving to him.

"Who are you?" asked Zaccix.

"My name is not what you seek, but why I want to talk to you" the old man replied.

"OK why DO you want to talk to me?"

"I know why you are here".

"Why? Tell me".

"Because by being here, you have a chance to stop the terrible conflict that is raging as we speak".

"What conflict?"

"The one you were just fighting in" the old man said, shaking his head.

"How did you know about that?" exclaimed Zaccix, astonished.

"You must find Taskmaster and tell him to go to a place called Las Vegas. Tell him to start at the very north of the city, and go out into the desert for exactly one hundred miles. Once there, he must dig one hundred meters downwards, and he will find the true answer to why he is able to respawn".

"Wait. How do you know about Taskmaster, and the fact that he can respawn? How do you know about Las Vegas? Where am I? Who ARE you?", Zaccix anxiously quizzed the man.

The man sighed. "You are on Earth, in a parallel universe to your own. The explosion caused by your engines when they left your ship caused you to arrive here".

"How do you know all this?" asked Zaccix.

"Because I have been watching you, and this conflict, unfold for a long time now".

"How?"

"Never mind how".

"OK for the last time, who exactly ARE you?" Zaccix asked with a strong hint of urgency in his voice.

"I."

The man coughed.

"I, am Lion Blackstar".



[This message has been edited by Zaccix (edited 05-27-2000).]

[LordKhaine]

Mars
Colonial mining station
Last Chance saloon

The bar is full of smoke and laughter, a hive of activity. Here were some of the worst pieces of scum in the galaxy.

Into this hell pit stepped Lord Khaine, the atmosphere in the bar changed instantly, with most people now finding a sudden and very determined interest in their beer.

He strood to the bar, where Lady_Ruiner was serving drinks, her metal teeth shone in the light. Her bite was rumoured to be able to go through 20mm sheet steel.

"What can I get you?" see asked

"I'm here for the one they call Prophetus" reply Lord Khaine

"Business or pleasure?"

"Business, most definatly business"

"Third door on the right down the hall" said Lady_Ruiner, as she pointed towards a door.

Lord Khaine strode over to the room, and knocked.

------------------------------------------------------------------

Some one opened the door, it was definatly Prophetus. She was was 6'3" in heels, and 5'4" without....

"Aaahh Khaine, I suspected you would return" she said "Just let me finish off this customer"

She closed the door, a few minutes later a man emerged, with a very happy expression on his face, and with a much lighter wallet. Prophetus came to the door and beckoned Khaine in.

"So, what brings you here. I wouldnt have thought this would be you're kinda place?" asked Prophetus

"There has been a development with TaskMaster, I have spoken with the council, we require him, eliminated"

"Why was I not made aware of such developments, I am a member of the council too you know!" demanded Prophetus

"That brings me to the other thing" said Khaine, as he took out a strange device from his pocket, It looked like an apple corer and had strange glowing runes on it. "Dont worry this wont hurt......"

".......much"

-------------------------------------------------------------------

Back in the hall, Lady_Ruiner heard the faint sounds of a scream.

"Sounds like some ones having a good time" she said to herself


===================================================================

LOL, this is in no way revenge for what Prophetus and Lady_Ruiner said in chat the other day, ohh noo ;) And Proph, dont go getting any ideas about what that device is you little pervert :)

[Prophetus]

Mars
Colonial mining station
Last Chance saloon

Exhausted from pain, Prophetus intently watches as the smiling LordKhaine leaves. Stumbling, Prophetus painfully stands over a velvet table. A shiny mirror made from highly polished diamond coldly greets her battered flesh. She gazes at the full figured body reflecting it's souless copy. An evil and seditious grin crosses her face. The face begins to warp, melting as ice on a hot piece of coal. The Xerholographic image of a sensual female sparks and fades out within seconds. From behind a titanium wall, an evil metalic and human form steps into the plush surroundings that clearly suggested a place of entertainment. The mirror no longer reflects the female form...instead a renegade spectre reborn in cyborg and human flesh stands poised. Grinning with red eyes ablazed in hatred.

The man once known as Judial Stone stares at the careless mirror.

"Yes, LordKhaine, Taskmaster will be eliminated. Then you my simple pawn, you will be next."

Many years Judial waited to enact his hellish revenge. Now, the time has presented itself. A silent knock reverbs softly into the room.

"Prophetus, is there good news?"

"Yes, Lady Ruiner. Good news indeed."

Lady Ruiner, although in confederation with Prophetus, is capable of destroying several members of the weak and pathetic 707th alone. But, she is smart and intelligent. She knows the power and skill Prophetus wields and she will use it and learn from it. Maybe one day, even surpass him.

"When shall we strike?"

"Patience, comrad. Patience. Let's see how far that simpleton will take our plans, even if he doesn't know it."

Prophetus laughs loudly inside. "Get Ruiner, we have another mission to take care of."

"Another?"

"Yes. I think it's prudent to disrupt some faith."

"Faith," Lady Ruiner smiles, "Yes, let's see how much faith they have."

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[Ci]Prophetus][PuF][

CAPTURE! Home of CTF map reviews, strategies and Forums.



[This message has been edited by Prophetus][PuF][ (edited 05-29-2000).]

[GunnerX]

Planet Rasmor
Ulysees Galaxy
Time: Unknown
---------------------------------

In the midst of the barren land a monstrous compound could be seen. As we examine the building closely, the sign -={F4RT}=- Genetics Factory catches ones attention. The building seems to be new with no sign of age. As we enter the building we see several hallways all leading to Lab rooms.

Upon entering we see several tubes filled with green liquid. It looks like some thing is growing in them!

"Hahahahaha!! Welcome my friend!" GunnerX exclaimed. "I have come to this place to avoid all the commotion elsewhere."

"I have toiled for a long time and have found the ultimate killing machine!! Gorri-CHYRStX!! All my hard work has finally paid off!"

It seems that in these lab rooms there are thousands upon thousands of tubes generating clones of Gorri-CHRYStX!! GunnerX motions towards the Elevators. As we enter the elevator, GunnerX places his eye for a retina scan. The Mind Reader machine read GunnerX's thoughts and the Elevator proceeded to move. After 10 minutes, the elevator stopped and the doors opened.

This area is totally different from the previous area. From first looks, it seems that this is where the Gorri-CHRYStX is trained! However, to enter, we had to pass through several heavily enforced gates. Once in, we were greeted by over 100 Gorri-CHRYStX clones wearing full body armor and heavily armed with Rocket Launchers. Upon careful inspection, there are over 50 more Gorri-CHRYStX clones perched up above, some very well hidden. The seem to track my every move with their sniper rifles.

In front of us is a Humoungous gate. GunnerX proceeded to open it and I was not prepared for what was coming up.

Once the gate opened, a humoungous 20 storey Hallway lay upon us. On each floor, you can see Hundreds of thousands of Gorri-CHRYStX clones! It seems that GunnerX has been working for a while.

As we proceeded down the hall. This was a good 30 minute walk, we see another huge gate. As GunnerX opened the gate, we see a multitude of Ships! Each one could easily hold 100,000 Gorri-CHRYStX clones and each is Armed to the teeth!

GunnerX looked at me and said "It is time." And his face lit up and a huge grin appeared.

Suddenly, loud sirens could be heard and soldiers began pouring out from nowhere. They were separated evenly and each battallion went to their respective ships.

GunnerX laughed and exclaimed "I shall conquer them all!! Hahahahahahaha!!!!"

"No one shall escape me, even the mighty Taskmaster will be unable to hide from my mighty mighty army of Gorri-CHRYStX!!!

Once all the soldiers entered the ships, each one began to disappear. It seems that each ship has cloaking ability and can generate it's own mini worm hole to bring it to it's desired location! Once all the ships disappeared, I was stunned by what lay in front of me.

A HUGE Battleship that stretches from one end to the other. GunnerX tells me to follow him to the battleship.

And the journey begins...

[Taskmaster]

"Aaarrrggghhhh....I will not die!" screamed Darth Maul as he lay on the ground clinging barely to life. The smell of burning air filled his nostrils coming from Obi-Wan's light saber as it hovered inches from his face.

"Yes, you will die," stated Obi-Wan matter-of-factly, "and you will do it now!" The light saber sliced Darth's head cleanly from his body cauterizing the wound.

"Hahaha! " laughed Taskmaster as he moved his Obi-Wan Lego(tm) man around the Lego(tm) Star War's Episode I Swamp playset. "Evil is once again defeated by good!"

He moved the Obi-Wan character over to the dying Qui-Gon Jinn. Jar-Jar Binks was already there holding his blaster rifle and muttering "Thisa nossa be good!"

"Uggh.. Obi..." sputtered Qui.

"Don't talk," order Obi.

"Y-you must con... continue with," wheezed Qui, blood dripping from his mouth with every word, "y-y-your training."

"I will!" declared Obi-Wan. "I will avenge your death!"

"I'm not d-d-dead yet!" managed Qui.

"Yea, I know, but there isn't much hope for you, since Darth cut you clean through at the mid-section."

"M-master... the J-j-jedi mind-trick!" commanded Qui as his eyes fluttered shut.

"You bet I will!" promised Obi-Wan as he let Qui-Gon's hand slip out of his. "That'll work great on the chicks at the space bar!"

Having defeat evil once again, Taskmaster returned the Lego(tm) blocks to the book shelf above his desk. It was time to continue his reading on Introduction to Genetics.

"Only 30 more pages to read." he thought wearily as he turned the page.

"I can't wait until they get the entire human genome mapped so there will be that much less studying I have to do!"

Suddenly there was a loud knock on the door. Taskmaster, more than glad for any interruption of his studying, opened the door expecting the pizza delivery guy.

"Oh my God!" he exclaimed, eyes wide in shock, as he stood looking out the door. It wasn't the pizza guy!

"I-I-I don't understand!" he finally said after what seemed like an eternity. "How can you be..."

"You?" the man outside the door finished the sentence.

Taskmaster leaned heavily against the door as dizziness struck him. He tried to come to terms with what was happening, but couldn't believe his own eyes.

The man outside the door, grabbed him by the arms and assisted Taskmaster into a chair.

"Simple," replied the man, who was the spitting image of Taskmaster, "becuase I am you!"



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I declare myself to be the self-annointed voice of reason for PuF! Opinions expressed by Taskmaster are not necessarily those of Planet Unreal! :)

[LordKhaine]

*bump*

[Taskmaster]

I've been gone to training class for a week. I get back to find no one has added anything! What's up with that? Hehehe...

*BUMP*

[jessseb]

Hey! Will y'all do me a fav'r? I'm wantin yez 't go on over 't 'da nali city map ideas forum. Pl'ese post on the "test, ignore" thread. I'm single handedly trying to revive it, and make some Nali City people mad in the process. I will post thank you's in the other stuff folder in the thread about Some. Please do this.

[Loibisch]

Well...at least he bumped this thread, sorry I can't make something up at the moment...got...to...try...harder......

Loibisch

I think Chryst should post here more...

[Wolf Blackstar]

I have a huge update planned, but I'm working 2 jobs now. It'll come when I find the time. :)

[LordKhaine]

Well I had exams and stuff, but Im sure I can post some thing soon :)

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[Ci]LordKhaine

It's not ego, it's charisma!

[DSV_Selerox[PuF]]

Bastards! you are not gonna leave this thread like this! :) POST DAMMIT!

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The new, improved Soundoff (http://www.planetunreal.com/soundoff) will return...

<[Ci]Skumboy|PuF> And the moral of the story is..... pffffffft, what moral? i just banned Blender!

<DSV_Selerox[PuF]> Yes I'm LordKhaine's brother (unfortunatly)
<RaptoR[PuF]> but you're not retarded, how can u be related?

[LordKhaine]

*bump* post comming up soon :)

[Taskmaster]

Now for a some scenes from last week's episode...

"Yes, you will die," stated Obi-Wan matter-of-factly, "and you will do it now!"

"You bet I will!" promised Obi-Wan as he let Qui-Gon's hand slip out of his. "That'll work great on the chicks at the space bar!"

"Simple," replied the man, who was the spitting image of Taskmaster, "becuase I am you!"

(Refer to my 5-30-2000 post for more details.)


Taskmaster sat up in the chair, staring at himself as if in a mirror, but the other Taskmaster was not his reflection. At that moment every cell in his brain was firing a mile a minute and the sheer concept of such a thing nearly short-circuited his thinking.

"I- I just can't fathom..." he started. "It's just too overwhelming!"

"I know this is difficult to comprehend," admitted the second Taskmaster, "but we don't have time to waste while you try to reconcile it all logically!"

"What'da you mean by that?" asked Taskmaster dreading the answer. Already Taskmaster 2 had walked to the room's full length window and opened it.

"Come here." ordered Taskmaster 2 as he looked out the window. His stare was a million miles away, litterally.

Taskmaster stood still shaking from his unepected encounter with himself, or more accurately a clone of himself. He walked to the open window, letting the crisp evening air snap his sense into focus.

"Look there..." said Taskmaster 2 as he pointed up into the star-studded night sky. "To the left of the moon."

"Yea, there are a bunch of stars. So what?"

"Not stars, my friend! Fleets of starships!" informed Taskmaster 2.

"Starships?" scoffed Taskmaster as he glanced over at his Star Wars lego sets. "Like in Imperial Battle Cruisers!"

"I am your father Luke!" laughed Taskmaster in his best, deep voiced Darth Vader impression.

"Enough!" yelled the Taskmaster clone startling the almost calmed Taskmaster. "This is serious...very serious! Time is short... we have to go!"

"Go?" echoed Taskmaster, "Go where? So there are some UFOs flying around the moon! Let NASA send out the welcome wagon for all I care."

"Don't you get it?" asked his double. "This isn't some 70's 'B' sci-fi movie! This is real!"

"And again I say so what!" exclaimed Taskmaster, "It doesn't concern me."

"Don't you remember anything about what has happened in the last few months?" asked Taskmaster 2, obviously annoyed at his name-sakes lack of concern.

"I've been here for the last few months working on my Bachelor's degree, buddy!" he barked. "I'm starting to think you should leave!"

"Oh, I'll leave...but you're going to come with me!" promised Taskmaster 2.

"I'm not going anywhere!"

Taskmaster 2 turned from the window and faced the defiant Taskmaster, looking at him directly with his cold stare.

"Those ships up there are here to find only one thing..." hissed Taskmaster 2, having lost his patience given the urgency of the moment, "...and that thing is YOU!"


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I declare myself to be the self-annointed voice of reason for PuF! Opinions expressed by Taskmaster are not necessarily those of Planet Unreal! :)




[This message has been edited by Taskmaster (edited 06-22-2000).]

[Morety]

I've been working on my next passage since I last posted. (One of my first posts is on this thread. My introductory "blue angel".)

I'm going to go back through it and see how many different signatures I've had.

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]LoL (http://home.triad.rr.com/jmayes/lol/)[Morety|PuF

Because hey, if it weren't for Llamas? I wouldn't seem like such a great guy.

]LoL[ - A big clan of Spam.

[The Dopefish]

burp

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<BLOCKQUOTE><font size="1" face="Tahoma, Arial, Helvetica">quote:</font><HR>To alcohol: the cause of, and solution to, all of life's problems.<HR></BLOCKQUOTE>

[The Dopefish]

burp

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<BLOCKQUOTE><font size="1" face="Tahoma, Arial, Helvetica">quote:</font><HR>To alcohol: the cause of, and solution to, all of life's problems.<HR></BLOCKQUOTE>

[The_Dudester]

The space beyond worlds is impossible to encompass within the human mind. Impossibly complex fractal structures plunge and twine within one another in frenetic convolutions, colours throbbing and swirling across their tortured surfaces. Within this inhuman domain live beings beyond all mortal comprehension. Once they meddled in the affairs of a thousand realities, shaping the development of millions upon billions of cultures. Now, they are in senescence. They have lived in immortality for too long, and the ennui is almost at fatal levels. Amongst the writhing cow-trees they can be seen, the twisted forms of a million gods, lost in the observation of a myriad worlds, dying of boredom.
Our mind's eye is caught in the apprehension of the scene by a subtle twitch from a single form. Its shape is Dragon-like, a seamless fusion of gene-tweeked alien flesh, unthinkably advanced technologies and obscure and occult magics, the combination threatening to drive the observer's mind to insane terror. Gazing into its observing globe, we see that it has been watching the events surround Taskmaster. There are numerous notes scratched in eldritch script by its body. Obviously, this being has found something of interest for the first time in ten thousand years.

With a sudden movement, the creature unfurls its black-silver wings and rises into the air. It's motions slowly grow more purposeful as it moves faster and faster, approaching one of the ancient slipgates. A mental command activates the fiendish device as the Dragon passes through. In the instant of activation, we glimpse a view of a human city, before everything fades to black....




[This message has been edited by The_Dudester (edited 06-24-2000).]

[Wolf Blackstar]

Dragon's Bane
Outer Martian Orbit


"........Damn!!! I get this close, and that stupid bastard blows up half of his fleet just to screw me up!!!"

Wolf paces back and forth, then stops to slam his fist into the bulkhead. The Captain and Corporal Stump both flinch in fear. "Status Report!"

"Sir, we've lost our portside engines. Damage is mostly superficial, but will require many crews to repair."

Wolf stares out at Mars and its orbital mining stations.

"Captain! you're back in command until I return. Stump, you're in charge of the repair crews. Get this ship back to fighting condition ASAP. Right now, I'm due for business with a couple of old alliances of mine...."

"Yes, my lord!" Both men acknowledge and salute.

Wolf makes his way to the central hangar, to his personal fighter. A completely different design, the Firehawk class heavy fighter combined the seldomly seen Dragon design with heavier firepower and more powerful engines.

Six tachyon cannons formed the ship's core firepower, which was also augmented by the modular design of the missile pods which formed its wings. The Firehawk's 16 missile capacity had struck fear into Coalition and Kilrathi forces alike. Even the repellent Nephilim had been forced into "early tactical withdrawal" at the hands of a skilled Firehawk pilot.

Wolf punches his codes into the fighter, straps into the cŏckpit and powers up the intruments.

A quick launch-sequence later, Wolf's fighter drops into space. Wolf sets a course for Mars and punches the afterburners.


Mars
Colonial Mining Station
Aerospace Forward Control

"Attention unidentified starfighter, you are ordered to power down your weapons and shields. Do not attempt resistance or you will be destroyed."

"Aerospace control, lower your shields and let me land my ship, or I'll torpedo your power generator and blast that rock your sitting on out of the sky."

"You have been warned. Defense Turrets online. Opening fire."

A barrage of laser fire and missiles lights the dark atmosphere over the mining station as the turrets spray Wolf's fighter with concentrated fire.

Wolf skillfully maneuvers his craft through the defenses, taking out the turrets one by one. He then blasts out the shield generators.


On landing, Wolf is attacked by all manner of mutant creatures. Wolf produces a Shock Rifle and blasts them into stinky green giblets.

After being assaulted by every sort of scumbag/hench-mutant imaginable, Wolf finally reaches his destination, the Last Chance Saloon.

Upon entrance, the stench of stale cigarette butts assails his nostrils. The denizens of the bar take one look at Wolf and quickly crawl off into the shadows, the smartest among them making their way to the door as swiftly as possible.

Wolf slowly walks to the bar. His boots make a slight crunching sound as he treads on the filthy floor.

"Where's Proph at?" Wolf asks as he sets the still-smoking Shock Rifle down on the bar.

"Prophetus does not wish to be disturbed right now." Lafy Ruiner's dark beauty contrasts sharply with the squalid atmosphere as she emerges from the shadows.

Suddenly one of the men who had previously been slouched out over his beer siezes this moment to lunge for Wolf's back with a cyanide-switchblade.

A split second before the deadly acid blade pierces Wolf's back, he spins around and greets the assailant with a boot to the guts and the butt of the Shock Rifle in the teeth.

The thug collapses in a bloody mess.

"You know, this place wouldn't be so bad if every time I came back, every moth-eaten scumbag wasn't trying to rub me out." Wolf says disgustingly as he sits back down at the bar.

A new voice speaks up from a darkened corner.

"What else did you expect? Lord Khaine has been here, and it was the best he could come up with. Pathetic, really."

Wolf instantly recognizes the voice; he turns and faces Prophetus.

"It's been a while, Proph. Lord Khaine has once again proved himself to be quite the thorn in our sides."

"What has the great Tight-*** been up to now.?"

"Well, he sacrificed half his entire fleet just to damage my ship. I lost most of my escort destroyers as well, and now I'm running low on resources. In addition to that, it just really pisses me off."

Prophetus laughs. "It's actually pretty amazing what that little fart is capable of once you've got him up against the wall."

"I'll be frank and open about it. I need reinforcements, and both of you are just the kind of warriors I need on my side. Larger things are at stake here, and LK is simply a fly in the ointment that needs to be squashed."

The 3 of them sit down at a table and discuss tactics. Wolf is suddenly interrupted by an urgent message on his comlink.

"What is it?"

"SIR! This is Corporal Stump!! We're under attack!!!"

"WHAT? LK again? that bastard! I didn't think he had the ships or resources to pull off another attack!!"

"No sir, it's an unidentified ship - like nothing I've ever seen before.

"I'm on my way right now. Have all fighters launched and tell the Captain not to hesitate on using our secret weapons."

Wolf snaps the comlink off and scoops up his Shock Rifle. "You guys might want to catch some of this - seems a new player has cut in on the action."

- http://www.angelfire.com/games/UTstuff/images/chainsaw.GIF
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]LoL (http://home.triad.rr.com/jmayes/lol/)[Wolf|PuF (http://puf.cjb.net)
-]LoL[ Counter-Sniper and Shock-Ho http://website.lineone.net/~jaseyjas/jasemoticons/shockwhore.gif

[tykeal]

"Why hasn't CHRYSt given the attack order? What's he waiting for?" mutters Tykeal to himself. "It's not like they're just going to tear themselves apart for us!"

[comm chirps]

"Yes? What, oh so great news do you have for me this time?"

"Sir, we've recieved a comunique from CHRYSt. It appears that he's ordering a withdrawal."

"What!?" thunder's Tykeal. "We finally bow to High Commands wishes and support the bastard and what does he do!? Order a withdrawal!? I won't stand for this anymore! Retrieve Taskmaster, he's the true prize."

"That's going to be difficult, Sir. It appears one of the Taskmaster clones has gotten to him and is interfering."

"I don't care what it takes, retrieve Taskmaster. If you have to take the clone as well do it!"

"Yes, Sir!"

Tykeal turns toward his display of the current battle and notices something new. "What's this? Where did that ship come from... I don't recognize the design. Perhaps that's why CHRYSt ordered the withdrawal...."

http://www.planetunreal.com/images/bullet2.gif
I belch in your general direction.

[The_Dudester]

The Dragon turns lazily in space, surveying the massed fleets nearby. For the first time in millennia, it feels the faint whispering calls of mortal thoughts.
Abrupty, it casts back its head and laughs - these puny beings think that it is a space-vessel of some kind! No matter, they are not important. The real goals lie on the surface of the planet below - in a place known to its inhabitants as "Las Vegas".

The Dragon turns its back on the massed fleets above, and twists space momentarily. Instantly, it is above the city of Las Vegas, close enough to feel the two power sources - actually one power source and the resonance from its human target. Twisting its head, the Dragon tastes space-time for the directions of these objects, impatient to correct a mistake made millennia before.

[This message has been edited by The_Dudester (edited 06-27-2000).]

[This message has been edited by The_Dudester (edited 06-27-2000).]

[The_Dudester]

The Dudester is meditating in his quarters, calm thoughts rushing through his Skaarj-hybrid mind, when he is rudely awakened by his Nali teachers.
They seem agitated, although this is hard to tell in Nali priests of such a high level.

"We bring terrible news, GreyOne," begins the most senior of the priests, Ouwandi'sha. "The old ones are returning to the world, to recover an artifact of great power. If they regain control of it, it will revitalise them and the myriad worlds will once again fall under their shadow." The Nali shivers despite himself at this thought.
"I'm confused," replies the Dudester, "Who are these old ones? You have taught me nothing of them before now..."

"Ah, GreyOne, when you came to us, fleeing the evil ones of the Messiah's race who wished to make you fight their wars for them, we taught you our arts of peace and tranquility. We were, and are impressed by your progress, and the small amount of telekinesis you have developed so recently.
However, the old ones are a secret known to only a few of us, lest the knowledge of them bring despair into less ascended souls." The old priest pauses a moment to sigh, t-king a bead of sweat from his brow to land on the floor.

"You may wonder, therefore, " the second priest, Shai'duha, "we have mentioned them to you now. The truth be told, we wish that we did not have to - but you are the one prophesised to help defend the world from the old ones shadow, so we must tell you of this now, as you are called by the strands of fate." He sighs too, but then continues, softly, as if someone - or, thinks the Dudester suddenly, something - might be listening in.

"The old ones are immensely powerful beings from beyond our world. Once, millions of crops ago, they ruled across reality - bending peoples to their will. Eventually, they grew bored of this sport and left us alone. As they withdrew, certain artifacts of their making were left behind."

"In most cases, the artifacts lost their power as the old ones left. Some, however, retained their vigour, casting their power in new forms without the insidious guidance of their absent creators. It is such a thing that the old ones have now discovered, in a city of the Messiah's home called "Las Vegas"."

"You must go, GreyOne and somehow destroy this evil artifact, before it is too late!"

[Wolf Blackstar]

"What the hell is that thing?"

"Don't know sir, I've never seen anything like it."

"Bah. Just another 'massive battlecruiser' design."

"But sir, they'd been giving us serious trouble before you arrived."

"Blast it with our primary weapons. Now."

A brillliant blue beam lances out from the Dragon's Bane and slices into the alien vessel's hull. Sparks and chunks of metal fly off the dying alien hulk as its engines, shields and weapons are blasted into smithereens.

The once mighty battlecruiser drifts helplessly, its hull breached and its life support failing.

"Sir....their life-support systems are failing, but I'm not getting any signs of sentient life forms. It's like.....well, something's there, but I'm not sure what it is."

Wolf immediately orders a division of his elite space marines to investigate.

When the squad returns, they are empty-handed, except for the commander, who is holding what appears to be a simian head.

"We found hundreds and hundreds of these.....creatures. Half ape, half cyborg, it seems. Whatever these things are, they're deadly in a fight and they attack in large packs."

Wolf examines the severed ape-head. "What's this?" he inquires. "There's some sort of label here":

http://www.angelfire.com/games/UTstuff/images/f4rt.GIF

"Gorri-CHRYSt-X?" Somebody seems to have resurrected the Gorri-CHRYSt design, and mass-produced it. This does not look good. If this ship was only one of a massive strikeforce.......

"Stump!! Get on the comm! Raise Prophetus and Lady Ruiner and tell them what's just happened. I'm gonna need some hard-hitting backup, and I need it ASAP! And get those shields back up now!!!"

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-]LoL[ Counter-Sniper and Shock-Ho http://website.lineone.net/~jaseyjas/jasemoticons/shockwhore.gif

[CHRYSt]

I feel obliged to post. Tho I have no clue where the story is, I am proud that people are keeping this alive. :)

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If it doesn't move, climb it. Or, if it moves real slow, that's OK too. Like old people.

[RaptoR]

ditto

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{FU}RaptoR|PuF

{FU} Fighter for Clan {FU}, PlanetUnreal Forummer
Check out The RaptoR's Lair (http://www.theraptorslair.homestead.com) for UT news, reviews and more...
Check out the {FU}Clan Website!! (http://www.fuclan.com)

[The_Dudester]

The Dudester is taken through to the depths of the Nali temple - one of the few that the Skaarj did not desecrate before they were defeated by the Messiah - to a room locked with a thick stone slab.
As this slides back under the prodigious mental powers of the two great Nali priests, the Skaarj-hybrid takes in an entirely unexpected view. The room is vast, and seems to be a converted natural cave. Water drips from stalagtites on to the stone floor, but also, and amazingly, onto a huge array of Skaarj and human technology.

Most of the room is taken up by a battery of mostly alien power cells and generators, crudely wired together to provide power to the three other systems that take up the remaining space. At the left of the room is a human heavy duty attack bike - obviously salvaged from a military wreck - its power cells and side-mounted plasma-gatlings hooked up on recharge. At the right is a a Skaarj weapon-storage system, filled with Razorjacks, ASMDs and a single Reedeemer (MK1). All of the weapons are fully charged, and surrounded by heaps of ammo.
These two prizes are overshadowed by the central crown jewel of the collection - a truely massive Skaarj teleporter.
"Where did that thing come from?" asks the Dudester, in shock and reverence.

Shai'duha responds, a hint of smugness in his Nali voice.
"After the Messiah destroyed the Demon-Queen, a few brave souls ventured into the lair of the Sky-Demons to see if their power could be turned to good. We found this giant machine and a talking book that explained the meaning of the Sky-Demon writing."

"In accordance with the prophecy, we took the machine here, to our secret stockpile, in preparation for this day."

Suddenly, the meaning of everything hits home to the Dudester.
"You want me to take a hundred year old attack bike and a set of out-dated weapons, drive into a Skaarj telegate to who knows where and fight an ancient god for an artifact of unholy power?" he almost shouts, the Nali-taught control catching just in time.

The priests look sympathetic. "The tasks set of us by the gods and fate sometime weigh heavy on our souls."

There is a long pause, while the Dudester wrestles internally with himself. An eternity passes before he speaks again.
"When I came to you and asked you for help, you did not send me away, even though I resemble your tormentors and oppressors. I thank you for that. I thank you also for my name you gave me - Dudasta'te* - to remind me of my origins and my calling. I thank you for your endless patience, and the great lessons you have taught me. Though this task you set me is most difficult, I accept it by your wisdom."

With that, he moves to the weapons locker and stocks the back of the attack bike with a selection of the guns and ammo, leaps onto the bike, and rolls onto the telegate platform.

"Well," he says, "What are you..." The telegate cuts him off as the ancient system auto-activates and hurls him through space to his destiny.

*GreyOne, or The One Who Is Both Evil and Good.

[Wolf Blackstar]

Unknown Forces of Evil
Undisclosed Location

"We must strike again, before we lose the chance."

"Why?"

"Because if events continue, one of the two Evil Overlord(TM)s currently battling for custody of the human known as Taskmaster will eventually gain the upper hand."

"So which one do we strike?"

"We shall unleash our next plot on CHRYSt."

"Ah, yes. After Lord Khaine's defeat involving the loss of most of his star fleet, it is only fitting that we deal CHRYSt a deadly blow."

"A most deadly blow indeed. We shall strke him the hardest where it hurts most - by taking away something that he values above all else."

"And what would that be?"

"His wife."


A most wretched plan is then set in motion.....


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-]LoL[ Counter-Sniper and Shock-Ho http://website.lineone.net/~jaseyjas/jasemoticons/shockwhore.gif

[Boom]

Just trying to clean up KU's mess. You guys have worked hard on this and it belongs on the first page.

I feel bad posting when I'm not prepared to add to the story, but this thread really deserves a big old....

*BUMP*

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]LoL[Boom|PuF
Author of the UT POEM (http://dynamic.gamespy.com/~unreal/ubb/html/Forum8/HTML/001030.html)

[Wolf Blackstar]

From one side of Mars, LordKhaine plots his next move.

CHRYSt, not knowing the awful fate that is about to become his wife, considers his plans of action.

Ships bearing loads of Gorri-CHRYSt-X's continue to appear on all fronts.

Wolf stands his ground, remaining unnaffiliated with either side, yet involved as deeply as both of them.

Prophetus and Lady Ruiner observe the situation and prepare their own plans.

The mysterious dragon looks upon its potential victims and smiles.

Dudester exits the portal and finds himself in a world unlike anything he's experienced before.....

....and through it all, Taskmaster2 deperately attempts to convince Taskmaster of the ever-increasing danger he is in, and the gravity of the entire predicaments....

...while unknown shadows stir the cauldrons of rising evil and darkness.....

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-]LoL[ Counter-Sniper and Shock-Ho http://website.lineone.net/~jaseyjas/jasemoticons/shockwhore.gif

[LordKhaine]

Deep space
Unknown space craft of alien origin


And so the scene is set, here lies the council of the damned. A council of imortal beings, infinatly powerful and wise. The room is pitch black, with each council member lit up by a strong spotlight from above.

Lord Khaine steps into the light, into his position, for he too, is a member of the council.

"Members of the council, I have returned, and I bring news you may find interesting......."

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LordKhaine

Wing Taker and Overall forum bad guy for hire.

[CHRYSt]

CHRYSt watches and knows all.

It was written long ago:
"The wife of the CHRYSt is truly holy amongst the wretched evil of this universe. Any who lays a hand upon such a creature shall be cursed for all eternity, as shall his descendants. Thou shalt not bring the wrath of the CHRYSt upon all living beings through the use of his wife. For that shall be the end of days."

CHRYSt quietly gathers his armies of 2.4 billion robot attack marmosets and waits patiently.

http://www.planetunreal.com/images/bullet2.gif
If it doesn't move, climb it. Or, if it moves real slow, that's OK too. Like old people.

[Wolf Blackstar]

Deep Space
Dragon's Bane
1500 meters from unknown space craft of alien origin's position

"Tracking....we've got lock!"

"We're at 150% charge, she's ready to rip!"

"Fire."

[Rodzilla]

I skimmed the first and last pages and noticed everything seems aimed at amusing Chryst. Is this WHOLE thread just that!?

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DarkReaper
FragFacility Administrator
FragFacility News Writer
DarkReaper@planetunreal.com
http://www.planetunreal.com/fragfacility




[This message has been edited by DarkReaper (edited 07-05-2000).]

[tykeal]

DarkReaper - you don't believe we would create a thread like this otherwise do you?

-------------On with the story-----------
"Sir, CHRYSt is requesting our supply of robot marmosets. How shall we reply?"

"No. We will not supply him with our marmosets. He may have command of the fleet, but I will not stand for his requesting our marmosets. What will we use for bait to catch dinner if he takes them? I for one refuse to go hungry just so he can use them as cannon fodder! Inform CHRYSt that if he makes such a request again we _will_ withdraw our support and continue with our main objective without him."

"As you wish, sir."

http://www.planetunreal.com/images/bullet2.gif
I belch in your general direction.

[tykeal]

Ack! Must not let die....

*bump*

[Someone]

"What was that noise?"

"Space debris..."

"Ok, nevermind"
------------------
On another note...CHRYSt!

[OshadowO]

*OshadowO tries to weasel his way into this thread but his feeble mind cannot fathom what's its purpose so he just spams and leaves, perhaps never to be seen again.

[Wolf Blackstar]

"My fellow immortals, I have excellent news! My master has instructed me on a most perfect plan. With it, we shall eliminate CHRYST, and carve out a larger holding throughout this universe. Soon, every star cluster and galaxy will be OURS!!!"

"Master Khaine, what is this great and glorious plan? We shall be eager to carry it out, if it is as sound as you claim."

"It is most simple in nature. We will destroy CHRYSt by taking that which he values most from him."

"And that would be?"

"His wife."

"Ah, but can't you see that he has already deployed forces in anticipation of such a move?"



* LordKhaine laughs diabolically


"FOOLS! Cannot your simple minds comprehend the perfect plan, even when it is so easy?"


* LordKhaine's anti-Proph robes glow in the dark room as he gets up from the table and presses a secret panel in the wall



"The best part is, I had already carried out my plan BEFORE revealing it to you - and long before CHRYSt even thought of preparing for it!"



* The secret panel opens, revealing a cryo-stasis chamber.



"We already hold her in the depths of this Secret Dungeon Lair of Darkness®. And if CHRYSt so much as thinks of a rescue attempt, she DIES!!!!"



* LordKhaine laughs diabolically

<scene fade out>

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-]LoL[ Counter-Sniper and Shock-Ho

[Taskmaster]

[Folks, I've been on vacation for a few weeks and I had honestly forgotten the forums. Let me make it up to you by continuing the story.]



Meanwhile, on Earth, two Taskmaster's argue over their fate. Mildly aware of the ongoing events in the cosmos, yet unaware of increasing gravity of the situation. Even Taskmaster 2 is woefully uninformed concerning the immense magnitude of the situation.

"Me?" stammered Taskmaster, feeling a twinge of fear under the piercing gaze of his genetic twin, "Why are they after me?"

"Unfortunately," explained his twin, "I do not have that information. I am lucky to be alive myself. As far as I know all my brothers have been eliminate."

"Brothers?" cried Taskmaster. "You mean there were more of me running around? I hope they didn't ruin my reputation as an up standing, law-abiding, God-fearing, American citizen!"

"Yes, a top-secret goverment operation created many clones from your DNA," outlined Task 2, "but due to a series of unexplained and unexpected events, the project became exposed. Some opportunistic folks took advantage of the situation. This forced the higher ups to view us clones as a liability. They began to terminate us one-by-one."

Taskmaster again was speechless, trying desperately to wake himself from this obvious bad dream. However hard he pinched himself, he just refused to wake up.

"On the bright side," chimed Task 2, "we gave you mom a real shock when a hand full of us clone stopped by the house trying to track you down! You should have seen the look on her face!"

"You did what..." yelled Taskmaster infuriated.

"Nevermind that..." interrupted his double, "we have got to leave! Time is short and getting shorter!" He pointed out the window toward the approaching fleet of spaceships for emphasis.

"I told you," ranted Taskmaster, "I'm not leaving! I have classes, tests, a hot date, and my copy of Diablo II. Now is just not a good time for a road trip!"

Taskmaster turned around to open the dorm room door so that his namesake could leave.

"I hate to do this," sighed Taskmaster 2, "but you leave me no choice." He landed a heavy blow to the back of Taskmaster's head, knocking him to the floor, unconscious.

*********

"Oh man...." moaned Taskmaster, "my head is throbbing like Fleetwood Mac's drum."

"Good, you're awake. How's the head?"

Suddenly Taskmaster realized he was not in his room, but rather in an unfamiliar car being driven by his clone. The dream he thought he had woken from was turning out not to be a dream, but rather a nightmare!

"Where are we?" he demanded roughly.

"On our way to a place where we can blend in with the nameless crowd. Someplace where no one will care who we are or what we do. Some place where the only thing that matters is how much money we have -- you do have money? No matter."

"Oh cool!" brightened Taskmaster slightly. "We're going to Six Frags Over Florida!"

"No," answered Taskmaster 2, looking away from the road to give Taskmaster a scold, "the other place where all they care about is your money! Sin City. Den of Inequity. Lost Wages. City of Elvis' Love Chapel. Las Vegas here we come!"

"Well, New Orleans is good this time of year, but I guess Las Vegas can't be that bad." agreed Taskmaster. "After all, who would think to look for us there?"

"Pass the chips will ya..." laughed his clone.

Taskmaster stuck his head out the window as the wind whipped through his brown hair. In the dim light of the cresent moon, he watched the faux stars drawing imperceptibly closer to the Earth. His eyes stared at the pin-points of lights until they became a blur in his sight.

"God, you've never forsaken me before..." he whispered into the wind, "don't start now."

The red tail lights of their lone car faded in the distance driving west on Interstate 10.

[Taskmaster]

Early morning, somewhere in Texas, two young men, posing as identical twins (as no one would believe the truth) sat casually chatting over some breakfast in a road-side diner.

Taskmaster was laughing to himself over the neon sign out in front of the diner, that due to a burnt out letter read "affle house".

"I hope that doesn't describe the food." he had joked with his twin when they first entered. Thankfully it turned out to be pretty good food.

They were basically out in the "boonies" as people say, and there was only few other customers, mostly truck drivers or locals on the way to work.

"Can I get another OJ here, please." asked Task 2 of the waitress reading the paper behind the counter.

"Su'r hon, be right there."

"So, who in there right mind orders mashed potatoes for breakfast?" he inquired of his traveling companion.

"Huh?" replied Taskmaster looking up from his plate of mashed potatoes. "Uh, I don't know... I just felt like I had to!"

Taskmaster used his utensils to shape the sticky potatoes slowly into a shape. From a vision in his mind's eye he tediously and systemmatically shaped the white mush into a work of art.

"Crap!" muttered his clone, "Is that Devil's Tower?"

The potatoes roughly resembled the ancient Sphinx and the Cheops pryamid of Egypt.

"No, of course, not!" scoffed Taskmaster, "Do you think I'm crazy or something! Seesh! Actually I think it's the Sphinx and a pryamid...but what does it mean?"

"How the hell should I know? You made it." responded Task 2. He peeled the little wax paper square of a pat of butter and put it on top of Sphinx's head. It slide forward as it melted knocking off the nose as it fell to the plate.

"Here ya go doll." said the waitress placing a small glass of OJ on the table. "Hey, them potatoes look jus' like the Luxor!"

"The Luxor?" both Taskmasters asked in unison.

"Yea. Ya'll know, that new hotel in Vegas that's made up as an Egyptian place or sum'thin'. Looks just like that...except for the butter."

The twins exchanged knowing glances at each other, excited, yet uncertain as to what the future held and what bizarre part did they play in the grand scheme of things.

"So why do you think they want me?" asked Taskmaster as they walked out to the car.

"Beats me?" laughed Task 2, "I don't see anything special about you, that's for sure!"

"Thanks alot!"

"Get in the car will ya?! We've got a long drive!"

The blue sky was clear for as far as the eye could see across the long stretch of northern Texas. The beautiful morning sun shone brightly, in stark contrast to the impending dark events soon to take place.

[LordKhaine]

Omg, Wolf, that post was so very Khaine-like Im both astounded and impressed:)

[Taskmaster]

Hey and what am I, LK, chopped liver? Maybe as a Brit you don't get my weird American sense of humor! Maybe you just don't care about Taskmaster... maybe you just want to see me dead!

Oh well, I guess I won't give up my day job! :)

By the way have you visited http://www.MikelRice.com to see what I did with it. Little better format now, but still pretty simple.

[Morety]

Task, you really want to be like LordKhaine?


Morety re-surfaces in China, where he's been teaching them all how to jump up and down at the same time in order to create a tidal wave which will wipe out the entirety of the American continents...

[Taskmaster]

No, but it would be nice to know that folks are at least enjoying the little stories I, and others, are writing. If not then I won't waste the time on it any more.

Taskmaster shapes his mashed potatoes into a translocator and teleports outta there....

[Taskmaster]

It seems the story is dead... long live the story!

It's been great fun guys.... I guess I'll check back every few weeks to see if this story gets revived from the dead.... Maybe I'll just end it all myself in one final story.

Taskmaster

[Loibisch]

Ok guys, I'm a bit behind you all so...
Do you remember the fight in earth orbit? Ok. Do you remember this here?:
Lord Khaines attack fleet
Earth orbit

"My lord, we need urgent assistance!, "The Hatred" has exploded and cripple the Dragons Bane, half the fleet is damaged" shouted the captain

"What condition is the gleeptoidians fleet in?" asked Wolf, as he manovered his ship for another attack run

"Sir, we havent meet the gleeptoidians yet!"

"WHAT?" bellowed Wolf, he cursed to himself as his concentration sliped and his left shields were stripped by a volley of laser fire.

"It was the Hatred, it just blew up!"

"Curse's, that Lord Khaine is more evil than we thought, all units break off and fall back to the main fleet. I repeat, all units fall back to the main fleet. Lets move it!"

Wolf's fleet disappeared as quickly as it appeared, leaving the remains of Khaine's fleet alone to wonder what had just happened.

"Loibisch, escort the attack group to these co-ordinates, I've transmitted you're orders to you, I'll meet you at nav point alpha #3857, Khaine out....."

Khaine's ship turned and warped after Wolf's fleet.

"You heard him guys, lets move it!" bellowed Loibisch, still in shock from recent events.

Well, things didn't work out quite as planned...

"One last thing", Loibisch activated the comm. "Fang Squadron, our orders have been changed, proceed to Nav5, your board computers already have to coordinates. I got no idea what's going to wait for us there". He switched off the comm, sighed, and switched it back on again.
"Warp to Nav5 in 5..ok, now we're..4..jumping to Nav5..3..which is near the fleet of Chryst..2..and surely heavily guarded..1..and the last thing I told my squad was..." and again all ships warped at exactly the same time, really looked cool.

The 1.63 seconds in hyperspeed (or Hyperblast? inside joke...) we're as boring as hell.

With a very loud noise the 673th Black Fangs Squadron shot into the the surrounding area of Nav5...and landed in the biggest damn dogfight they ever had. And the last one...

"Oh my..." Loibisch wasn't able to speak/think this to the end (hey, that needs a while...:D). Instead he did something to save his lfe and rolled his ship left to avoid the laser salvos. Well, not all ofthe pilots have been so smart, and so the 673 Fangs squadron had it's first loss. It was Mike, the newest member of the squadron. Loibisch imself once said that Mike would never make it into a big squad and if he did he'd surely die on his first misson. It wasn't his first mission but his second so Loibisch had lost the bet with Zaccix. But at this very moment Loibisch had some bigger problems than Mike (he's already dead, so what?).

"Incoming enemys" he didn't say which direction, didn't matter. They came from everywhere. After some of his standard maneuvers the first 3 enemys got bored and became some easy targets :D. The rest of the Fang's squad did pretty much the same, but already the next wave didn't bother with the maneuvers anymore but simply used a big rocket (still in beta stadium), called "Redeemer MkII". It's predecessor "Redeemer MkI.V" was mostly used in "to the death" fights, the so called "Unreal Tournaments" pretty bloody sport, and the death count per person had never risen above 1, as far as Loibisch knew, pretty bloody sport...
Avoiding the Redeemer blast was no easy task, in fact another 2 Fangs members died in the explosion of this deadly weapon. Jim-Bob-Jimmy-Ray-Joe (he never got that name right) did something very amusing...well of course only if you can laugh about kamikaze runs. JBJRJ flew directly into...well, I donT' have to tell you that, do I? *sigh* Ooook!

JBJRJ flew directly through a pack of enemy fighters, oine of those fighter had his frag count risen by two, the other one by three (4 minus one for self-kill). A 3rd d00d shot the rocket straight after JBJRJ, to the mother ship...I won't mention his fragcount here.
Unfortunately JBJRJ died in the explosion, not of the Redeemer but of the mother ship =P.
The other dead guy isn't worth a mention (he was the guy who said he'll take out whole Chrysts fleet on his own...).
Loibisch himself was a bit more safe in his ship than the restof his squad. His RTS (Return-to-Sender) system did it's job very well, not to say pleasing...

The third wave was a bit harder, they had ION-cannons which were pretty effective against the Fangs squad. Loibisch's ship got disabled to 67%, engines running on half, weapons running on 3%, core unstable. He decided that the best way to deal with teh situation would be a tactical retreat (hey!). He ordered his squad to retreat back to the rest of the base.
Loibisch himself wasn't able to flee back to the burned out hull of "The Hatred", too many enemys in his way. So he decided to try to make it out of Earth orbit, into Earth atmosphere...unfortunately he didn't watch his six properly, and his enignes got disabled another 27%, rendering them too weak, not to say useless, for navigating in Earth atmosphere.

His ship - almost ocmpletely out of control - was falling "down" to Earth. With the little control Loibisch had left he managed to have a - let's call it "safe" - landing near the surrounding area of
.................................................................................................... ....................
Las Vegas

Next passage in Vegas coming soon (I hope)



So the squadron lost 113 of it's 12 members (or something like that :D), and only Loibisch survived (I g2 get rid of that squad...:D)

Loibisch

[CHRYSt]

Through it all, the one true CHRYSt is drunk on wine coolers, watching his home movies of the day that Taskmaster lost his arm while juggling chainsaws...

[Loibisch]

*sigh*, the good old times...

[The Dopefish]

http://www.dopefish.com/images/xmasfish.gif

Christmas in August is so underrated.

[OshadowO]

amuse you say? you want a muse? kinda like selma hayak in dogma?

[Taskmaster]

"Will you look at that!" exclaimed Task 2 as the car reached the top of a hill.

"The mother lode!" echoed the real Taskmaster as he took in the view.

As the car sped down the hill toward the valley they could see the bright cty lights of Las Vegas. Their destination was finally in reach. The momentary excitment seemed to wipe away the forbodding danger and immense magnitutde of their impending arrival.

"Woohoo!" screamed Taskmaster at the top of his lungs, wth his head sticking out the car window. The crisp night time air whipped across his face at 70 mile per hour. His hair danced wildly in the moon light. The approaching alien spaceships were literal a million miles away from his thoughts.

The excitment slowly wore off and Taskmaster dropped back into his seat. The raod trip was about to end, and the reality was about to begin. He solemly looked over at what bascially himself driving the car, and remembered the gravity of the situation.

Task 2 felt the weight of Taskmaster's stare and glanced over, and for a moment felt his namesake's pain. He, out of all the people in the world, could actually understand what it was to stare back at yourself. To know that your entire reason for existing was for someone else benefit, yet not even knowing the reason. On someone else's whim his life was change forever... on someone else's whim it would end.

Faced with the overwhelming desire to run away and hide, Taskmaster did what he always did under pressure...told a joke.

"Sorry to stare..." he finally said, "but I just realized how good looking I am!"

"It must be the genes." shot back his clone with a laugh.

"I..." started Taskmaster, then stopped. "I, I don't have a clue as to what is going to happen, but I just wanted to say 'Thanks'"

"Thanks? For what?"

"For letting me know." he replied. "If I'm going to die I at least appreciate knowing about it. I have a better changce fighting something I know is coming."

"I may be a clone, but I don't want to die anymore than you do. At least you have a home here, family and friends. I'm just some lab experiment that got out of his cage."

"Well one thing is for certain." mustered Taskmaster, "What ever happens, life will never be the same again!"

"Hey look... a signpost up ahead."

"Las Vegas 45 miles" read Task 2 as he piloted the car onward.

The look-a-likes turned inward on their thoughts as the wind whistled past their windows. The desert landscaped rushed by in a blur of dark shapes and shadows under the dim, moon lit sky. Destiny awaited their arrival.

[Taskmaster]

"Wow!" whistled Task 2 as he drove down the main strip of Las Vegas. The glitter and glitz mixed with the delapidated and faded, the filthy rich mingled with the dirt poor, the haves and the have nots shared the same city.

"I think we just discovered why California doesn't have any power..." mused Taskmaster, "...all these lights are sucking it dry! I don't thin I have ever seen this many lights in one place before... and not a single one is burnt out."

"He who has the money has the power..." remarked Task 2, "...and the electricity!"

"Man, I can almost smell the decadence." noted Taskmaster as he glanced from side to side taking in all the sights. The glittering lights reflected in his eyes.

"They have no need for street lights thanks to all the neon signs and light displays." stated Task 2. "And all the loser are paying the bills! What a racket."

"So how do we get it on it?" joked Taskmaster.

They "ooh'd" and "aahh'd" their way down the famous strip of casinos, night clubs, liquor stores, fast cash and pawn shops, "gentlemen" clubs, and every other type of sleazy past time you could name.

"Look!" pointed Taskmaster, "There is my mashed potatoe hotel. I mean, that's the place I sculpted out of mashed potatoes!" [Ed. note: See previous story a few pages back]

"The Luxor!" enthused his clone. "Well... I guess this is it." he sighed. He drove the car into the huge lot and parked.

The excited pair exited the car and stood in the cold night air looking at each other across the car's roof. Taskmaster was the first to glance up at the "stars" near the moon. They seemed to be growing bigger and brighter as he stared at them, but it may have just been in his head.

"They'll be plenty of time to worry about that later." said Task 2 flatly. "Let's get a room and get some sleep. I, for one, am tired!"

"Yea... if I can sleep."

*****

It was 3:46 PM local time as the pair made their way through the casino's entrance and lobby. Taskmaster noticed the arcade was full of young kids playing unsupervised and a few were asleep on the floor. He didn't need to ask where their parent's were... as he already knew. They were somewhere in the flashing lights of row upon row of slot machines and card tables. "Victimless crime you say" thought Taskmaster.

"I'm sorry Sir, but your over your credit card limit." said the clerk into the phone, "I can't have any more drinks sent to your room."

"Welcome to the Luxor!" smiled the clerk as the twins walked up to the front desk, "How can I help you."

The travelers made arrangements for a room for the night. "Enjoy your stay." chimed the clerk as she handed Task 2 a phamplet. "Welcome to Las Vegas" was emblazed on the front across a night time picture of the strip. Inside was all type of advertisments extoling the virtues (or lack of them) of each establishment.

*****

Night had given way to day, hiding for a few scant hours the various fleets of star ships approaching the Earth. Somewhere in the midst of the multitude of rooms in a city of numerous hotels in a state with hundreds of cities in a country with 48 states (the other 2 are "out of the country") slept a pair of young men, whom by fate, shared the same DNA and genetic information. There destinies were intertwined like a piece of strawberry Twizzler that was even now being slowly pulled apart.

Sleep did not come easy, and when it came it was filled by disturbing dreams...or maybe visions, of untold horrors and unknown evils. Sleep, but no rest for the weary and heavy laden.

[Morety]

Morety, back home in Canada from a Florida hockey hockey vacation which included Krispy Kreme Donuts, decided he'd had enough snow and booked a 4 day trip to Las Vegas.

He'd received a nice deal at a fairly new hotel. He had checked into the Luxor, pretty much event free. He'd taken his 5th floor room overlooking the strip, and had immediately left to go look for a game and fortunes untold.

Unfortunately, the Casino Luxor was pretty full. He was standing as close as possible to a blackjack table patiently waiting for a spot to open up.

5 minutes. 10 minutes. No one was moving out. Impatience was building. Fortunately for Morety, so was gas. *PWaaaaaaaaaaaat* A nice, quiet and airy gas pang sneaks out. Suddenly, it was just Morety splitting his bets with an ashen faced dealer...

[Taskmaster]

Taskmaster awoke groggily to a knock on the door... "Housekeeping" called the femine voice on the other side.

Taskmaster cast a wary glance, with one eye opened, at the bedside clock. 10:30 AM. "Uooahhh" he moaned as he rolled over and sat up. He wiped the crust from his eye and scratched his chin.

"Can you come back later?" he half asked and half demanded.

He grabbed his clothes from the floor and entered the bathroom. He barely noticed that Task 2 was not in his bed as passed by. He started the hot water and relaxed under the steaming stream of water.


MEANWHILE IN THE CASINO

Task 2 was not much for gambling, nor was he much for anything. Spending most of his short life in the lab, being exposed to accelerated growth hormones and top-secret experimental cell altering drugs, he had not had much time to do anything normal people take for granted.

Having woken up, but not wanting to wake the snoring form of his genetic twin, he had decided to take a self-guided tour of the hotel. The free breakfast bar had held his attention for a while -- until he was full.

The hustle and bustle of the casino had attracted him next and he decided to try the various games of chance (little or no chance as he understood it). Slot machines seems a bit mindless after a couple of bucks so he decided to try BlackJack.

A few of the ladies at a table were more than willing to teach him the game, at least the basic idea. Having a nice wad of money he had borrowed from one of the corpses during a botched recovery attempt (the had botched recoverying he and a few fellow clones) didn't hurt his popularity.

BlackJack required more thinking, and his sharpened mental abilities that were a byproduct of the genetic manipulation made it easier to count the cards even with a six deck shuffle. He was doing pretty well and saw no reason to quit as long as he and his new found companions were having fun.

"Excuse me, but can you step back a bit please?" asked Task 2 politely as a man behind him was a little over eager to see what was going on. "I just need a little elbow room, if you don't mind."

"Sure. Yea, no problem man." responded the man as he moved a bit back.

"Any room here for another?" the man asked a few moments later, obviously intent on joining this table.

"Table is full." replied the dealer as he raked in the cards. "Place your bets."

"Come to papa..." teased Task 2 watching the cards being dealt, and a jack of spades showing. A young lady gave his arm an excited squeeze as she squealed gleefully.

"Black jack!" said Taskmaster as he collected his winnings.

"Oh goodness, what is that smell?" he ask his female companions, rhetorically.

"He who smelt it, dealt it!" chimed in the stranger who had been hovering over Task 2's shoulder.

"Get a life..." suggested Task 2 as he tipped the dealer a hundred, "you need one worse than I do!"

"Leaving so soon?" asked the man sarcastically as he sat down to play cards.

The dealer waved to his pit boss for a replacement. He needed a break, and some fresh air.

[Morety]

Morety seats himself at the blackjack table...grumbling to himself.

"Smelt it dealt it, man, I thought that was funny. What a jerk. Get a life, hmmmph. He should get a life"

"Sir, Sir?!?!"

"Uh? Oh, oh sorry, wasn't concentrating there. Hit me."

As the ashen faced dealer pulls throws up a 3 to go with Morety's ace in the hole, a low, deep sounding grumbling noise slowly comes into hearing range. Rising in volume, slowly. The glasses begin to rumble, shaking on the countertops, ashtrays rattling, shaking free their ashen contents.

The dealer, suddenly had a look of fright in her eye. "Oh please sir, no, not again. I don't think I can handle another one. I have a break coming up in two minutes, could you please hold onto it."

"Uh, that isn't me or my stomach" Morety confides in all seriousness. He wonders to himself if it's the Chinese he had trained to jump up and down in unison, but dismisses it as he had not given the word....yet.

Morety folds his hand immediately, and runs over to the nearest window to look outside to see where the noise is coming from....

[Taskmaster]

(Morety, you pushed the story a bit fast here, but I guess that saves me a lot of "small talk" in between! Let's see if any one else will jump in to write the "other people's" part of the story so I don't have to!)



Taskmaster stood in front of the partially fogged mirror blow drying his hair with the small, hotel provided drier. It wasn't very powerful, but it was slowly working. He had allowed himself a long, hot shower as he had no plans for the day and no place to be.

"Gee, I hope all this 'high' heat doesn't damage my hair." he quipped sarcastically. He pointed the hair drier at the fogged mirror clearing a round spot so that he could see himself more clearly.

For a moment he stared at his reflection solemnly. It may as well be my clone and not just my reflection, he thought. It was still hard to get used to the idea that another human being was genetically identical to himself, yet still unique in terms of experiences, thoughts, dreams and desires. I guess this must be what real twins struggle with as they try to establish their own identities. At least we aren't wearing the exact same clothes, he mused.

"So Taskmaster..." he said to his reflection as he brushed his brown hair, "how is this new found twin going to affect the rest of your life? Remind me to not let myself ever be genetically clone again...it just makes such a mess of things."

"Of course, when men decide to play God, certain consequences are inevitable, but in our arrogance we choose to ignore them until it is too late."

Taskmaster pulled on his clothes. He had nothing else to wear since he was forcible removed from his college dorm room, effectively kidnapped. He felt dirty, but his clothes were basically clean in appearance, they had just been worn for the past four days of near nonstop travel from Florida. He ran his hand across his unshaven face wistful for a shave. The unshaven look didn't really work for him, but it would do for now.

Although neither he nor his traveling companion had carried in any personal belongs, other than the clothes they were wearing, he instinctively checked the rooms to ensure he
wasn't leaving anything behind. He noticed the small Gideon provided Holy Bible on one of the night stands and grabbed it.

"I have a feeling I'll be needing the good book." he justified as he slid the small Bible into his back pant's pocket. He headed out to give the luxury hotel the once over and to pick up some food. He had suddenly realized he was "starving".

Before long he was sitting pool side at an umbrella covered table, saying grace over a piping hot cheeseburger and a pile of fries.

"Temptations, temptations!" he muttered as he opened his eyes and looked around at all the scantily clad ladies sunbathing and swimming around the mega-sized pool. The entire area was based on an Egyptian oasis. Royal palms, papyrus and lotus plants skirted the patio area, while the hotel staff had uniforms with an Egyptian flair and style.

He quietly sat eating his meal savoring the flavor of the "fancy" ketchup. Being a college student, he wasn't able to afford the "good" ketchup and had been relegated to using the extra packets of catsup he'd collected from trips to Burger King.

The breeze was cool and gentle, the soft, piped-in music was soothing, and the scenery was pleasing.

"This is the life!" he exclaimed. "I wonder where Task 2 has gotten off too? He doesn't know what he's missing."


AT THE SAME MOMENT IN ANOTHER PART OF THE HOTEL

"Oh yes baby!" gasped the hot blond as she writhed wildly atop Task 2. She was one of the women who had accompanied Task 2 while he played poker. A little time at the hotel's bar had turned into some thing a little more intimate.

Task 2 greedily drew in his breath as he flexed to match his partner's motion. He ran his hands down the supple curves of her soft breasts as they danced against his fingers.

"Baby, you're makin' the earth shake!" blurted Task 2 between breaths as he felt himself reach the point of no return.

Suddenly the lamp rattled off the night stand and shattered on the floor. The bed was shaking worse than a vibrating bed at a cheap roadside motel.

"I'm not the only thing rocking your world!" his naked bedfellow exclaimed as she rolled off his frame and onto the bed next to him.

"Oh man!" shouted Task 2 as he bolted out of bed. "I was hoping to have a few days to prepare..." he continued as he quickly dashed into the bathroom. He was half dressed as he opened the room's door to leave.

"I'd get dressed, and get out of town if I were you..." warned Task 2 as the hotel continued to shake and the loud rumbling outside grew louder and louder. "You don't want to be around when this hits the fan!" With that he closed the door and hurried off.

She laid on the bed, flushed and breathing heavy, as she pulled on her clothes. The look in his eye told her this was no joke. She got out of bed and started packing her things...

****

Taskmaster leapt out of his chair in shock, causing it to tumble over behind him. The water in the pool shook violently like choppy surf. The patio furniture rattled on the tiled deck. His plate, empty except for the unused blob of ketchup, clattered to the floor. Hotel guest clamored out of the pool or ran for the "safety" of the hotel.

A huge object blotted out the sun allowing Taskmaster to look up easily into the sky overhead. The entire area was shaded by the immense object that was approaching from above.

"Oh great God in Heaven!" managed Taskmaster as his jaw dropped. He stood rooted to the pool deck as he stared up in disbelief...

[Edited by Taskmaster on January 24th, 2001 at 05:46 PM]

[Taskmaster]

(THIS IS NOT PART OF THE ON GOING STORY! This is a story along the lines of what started this thread. A little death and mayhem 'old style' in a hope to get people interested in this thread again... CHRYSt, this one's for you.)



*Taskmaster walked the crowded midway at the state fair.

*Taskmaster seeing a sign that read "BRAVE (but dumb) VOLUNTEERS NEEDED!" decided they must be talking about him.

*Taskmaster entered the tent and agreed to be the assistant for a side-show magician in TRAINING.

*Taskmaster signed several waiver forms in triplicate, smiling happily.

*Taskmaster was strapped to a vertical spinning wheel used for knife throwing exhibitions.

*Taskmaster was blindfolded, then given a good spin.

"Whooooaaa..." screamed Taskmaster getting dizzy... "Hey this is fun!"

*Tasmaster heard a a loud metalic thud and felt a violent pain in his leg!

"Owww... that hit me!" yelped Taskmaster as the knife stabbed through his leg.

"Sorry, I'm new at this..." was the reply of the unseen magician trainee.

"Ugghhh... oowwwww!" screamed Taskmaster as a second knife pounded through his arm.

"Oopps... missed again!" exclaimed the trainee.

"I want off!" pleaded Tasmaster "I quit!"

"Sorry... you signed the papers!" replied the trainee and he whipped another knife toward the spinning "Taskmaster on a platter".

"Sweet Jesus!" begged Taskmaster as he felt two fingers get severed from his hand.

"Quit whinning you big baby!" scolded the trainee, "I only have a few more knifes left."

Thud... another knife... OUCH!, another painful injury inflicted on a very nausious Taskmaster.

Thud... another knife... @*#&$*! bellowed Tasmkaster.

"You didn't need that foot anyway... you have two!"

Another thud of the knife hitting wood, but wait, no pain.

*Taskmaster's one uninjured arm was cut free from its leather bond.

*Taskmaster pulled off his blindfold in time to see CHRSYt let go off the last dagger.

"I'll never get the hang of this!" said CHRSYt dejectedly as the spinning wheel finally slowed to a stop.

"I guess I'll try again!" he said as he roughly yanked the dagger out of Taskmaster's split skull.



Hee hee... nothing like the good old days to warm your heart!

[CHRYSt]

Hot damn. LoL! Sominthing to brighten up my night. Wee!

I was all upset when this thread turned into a boring epic story. And it's finally brought back to life. doing it's job. Actually entertaining me....Just you guys wait till tomorrow...I've got some stuff I've been dying to use on this, but couldn't.

Same bat time, same bat channel!

[Taskmaster]

(I can't resist doing another silly little story, since no one else seems interested in carrying on the "epic" although I felt I was doing some pretty nice story telling!)


*Taskmaster, needing some hardware to do a repair on his UT level, since some thoughtless players had left unsightly bullet holes and bomb craters everywhere, headed for the store.

"Hmmn... CHRSYt's Hardware" mused Taskmaster. "Heavenly products at one helluva low price" read the sign in the window.

*Taskmaster entered the store and began shopping.

*"Hey cool!" muttered Taskmaster as he came to a table of free samples.

*Taskmaster followed the instructions of the little plaque "Eat Me! (one per customer) and swalloed the package of black colored powder.

"Yuck...very gritty and terrible flavor. I'm not going to be buy any of that junk!"

*Taskmaster found a few useful UT level repairing items, such a "Shrapnel Hole Putty", and added it to his cart.

*Taskmaster strolled down the next aisle and again encountered free samples.

"Sweet Sulfur - TASTE ME! (one per customer)" read the sign on this table.

Again Taskmaster managed to get the dry powder down, but again Taskmaster was not impressed by the texture or flavor of the product.

"No wonder they have to give it away!" he choked out.

*Tasmkaster dropped some "Gib 'B' Gone" cleaner in his cart.

The free smaple on the next aisle showed some promise. "DRINK ME! (one per customer)" demanded the notice next to the bottles of liquid.

"Must be hot sauce!" thought Tasmaster since the bottle had flame symbols and some type of warning on them. The foul tasting liquid washed down the dry powders, but left a bad after-taste.

"I wonder how they stay in buiness with stuff that tastes so bad?" he thought to himself.

He grabbed several boxes of "Nali Cow Repelent" hoping to keep those darned pest from eating his grass.

"Man do I have some bad indigestion!" he said as he let out a loud burp!

"SMOKE ME!" was displayed on the last table, and no apparent limit. Taskmaster, although not a smoker, decided that the nasty cigarette taste would hide the even nastier taste of the drink he had just had.

He picked up the cigarette and held it between his lips. He flicked the lighter at the tip of the cigarette.....


"Another clean up on aisle 6!" squaked the store speaker
system.

[Taskmaster]

"Man this is sweet!" exclaimed Taskmaster as he examined the Super Bowl badge that gave him access to the sidelines. On the ground next to him lay some wussy photographer whom Taskmaster accidentally hit in the head with a blackjack.

*Taskmaster grabbed his bag of "goodies" and made his way to the field.

*Taskmaster slapped high-fives with his buds on the Raven's squad.

"Welcome back to the bay!" he said to Dilfer. "I've got some 'gifts' for Giants."

"Hey Big Tony!" smoozed Taskmaster as Tony crushed his hand in a shake. "Got you a bucket of KFC right here man!"

*Taskmaster greeted the rest of his buds and then began to prepare. He ran directly across the field on the 10 yard line, a trail of whte power pouring out of his bag directly over the white line already marking the field. No one noticed.

*Taskmaster handed the "ball boy" on the sidelines a football from his bag. Taskmaster flashed his badge and said it was a "commemorative" football.

"I did you a favor coach..." taunted Taskmaster to the Giants head coach, "I super-glued Brittany Spears dressing room door shut. Maybe we can salvage the half-time show after all!"

*Taskmaster reworked the wiring to the instant replay "hood" so it would play a loop of "the head official in a comprimising position" with some text overlaid reading "Raven's favor or this goes to the big screen!"


Time for the kick-off! Taskmaster covered his ears, but not his smile.

"BOOM!!!" the football exploded on impact as it landed in the hands of the Giants' receiver who was back deep. His helmet flew into the stands. "Eww... that hard to hurt."


Goal line stance. Giants trying to stop the Raven's here. Ball on the 12 yard line. Taskmaster lit a match and dropped it on the 10 yard line.... flash powder exploded instanly blinding the Giant defense.. Touchdown Ravens!

Taskmaster unplugged the quarterback coaches headset and plugged it into his boom-box. Cranked up to 11 he blasted Van Halen into Collins helmet bursting his eardrums, which caused his blanace and equilibrium to be off. Interception!

"Ahh" though Taskmaster as he savored the victory. Never has one man done so much for so many, yet be unknown for so long...

HUH?

[Morety]

*Morety finds a bannister made of razor blades.
*Morety gets all nekkid
*Morety yells "HEY EVERYBODY, LOOK AT ME!"
*Morety slides down the bannister
*Morety slices hisself in half on the way down. One half falls on the stairs, the other on the floor beside the stairs.

[LordKhaine]

Wow, nice to see you again task!. Expect Khaine to start his land attack tomorrow! Taskmaster will be mine! :D

[Taskmaster]

Just remember to let me and Task 2 live! I have plans for Task 2, and gee.... I don't want to die or have terrible alien test run on me. :D

I need to have Wolf's fleet/ship involved as well if I am to pull of my envisioned finish. I'm ready to tie up all the loose ends and finish up this "epic".

Then I can go back to posting short, unrelated stories with out the pressure of remembering what I had so-n-so do or say.

[Morety]

It's late at night on the PuF camping trip. The campfire is slowly fading to embers, amidst a collection of bottles and cans strewn about from a night of drunken mayhem.

Morety and CHRYSt step back from the crowd, into the pitch black of night and head over to the outhouse. They each grab a side of the shack, and move the outhouse back 2 feet. The basement entrance is now strategically positioned in front of the door. CHRYSt and Morety then hide nearby, waiting with their packages of firecrackers, trying not to snicker too loudly.

"Shhh"

"Here comes somebody..."

Stifling snickers, Morety and CHRYSt watch as they can barely make out Taskmaster, making his way for the outhouse. In the faint shadow of the moonlight, the see Task approaching the outhouse, beginning to outstretch his arm toward the handle.

*PBLBLBLBLBAAAATTTTTTTT*

Into the mire falls Taskmaster.

"NOW!" shouts CHRYSt as he lights his row of firecrackers. Morety follows suit.

"HELP! LET ME OUTTA HERE!" screams Task. He looks up to see the smirks on the faces of Morety and CHRYSt. "Uh guys, can you give me a hand here?"

CHRYSt begins to snicker out loud, which sets Morety off into gut retching laughter, setting CHRYSt off into the same.

CHRYSt says "Here ya go Task", and throws in a row of firecrackers. Morety throws his in too. Then they both start lighting and dropping firecrackers into the stool pit containing a very frightened Taskmaster.

"BOOM" The firecrackers seem to have caught a gas pocket. The ensuing explosion shoots Task 500 metres into the air. The p00p flies everywhere, covering Morety and CHRYSt. They look up in the air, only to see Taskmaster plummeting towards them.

CHRYSt steps to one side, and Taskmaster lands on Morety, snapping both their backs, along with several other bones.

CHRYSt, on his way to the lake to take a cleansing swim, thinks "that was worth a bit of p00p on myself". At least I didn't get any into my mouth. That could've set the world record for the biggest hot carl...hey...wait a minute....hmmmmmmmm"

[Beaf]

Somehow, that fat dude pictured as my avatar comes out of the woods, drops down his 86-gage-pants and releases a well-blown-turdadellic-incredebly-smelly-suprisingly-harmonic-defecately-carvernous-FART with a smell that would choke a turd-burglar! It's enough to make you run like a girl to the next corner, pass GO, take your 200$ and buy the Marvin Ave. on which you will eventually build 2 hotels, one blue and one red.............

[Morety]

...but did he wipe his butt?

[Beaf]

Well... I knew I would get that question...
and that is exactly WHY, I DID look in Fatty's undies after the trip. Believe me.... it wasn't pretty!
It actually reminded me of that time where my friend had left a Mars bar in his pack sack when we went to Virginia Beach by horse.....
..........or maybe of that other Dude who had dropped his boxer-shorts on the sun-deck, beside the pool where evrybody was swimming, and that someone was cleaning everything on the deck and asked who's boxer's these were.....
He proudly lift up his arm, since there were little happy faces and lil' jokes you couldn't make out anymore on 'em...
The other turned the boxers around and you could see a pretty nasty slice!!!!!!!!
I can tell you that everybody got out of the pool like a Novice-Player-lucky-enough-to-kick-in-a-multi-kill-and-got-the-flag-by-luck-and-must-now-retreat-to-his-base. The Dude was left alone in his Turd-Soup!
(true story man!)

[Taskmaster]

And all this contributes to the story and entertainment in what way?

That "story" really stinks! Butt seriously I hold this creative story telling in high regard, and try to push out only quality material. Please clean up your act or I will have to log a complaint with the moderators...

Oh wait... Morety is a moderator... :D

[Morety]

lmao

Task, you're such a wise cracker

Did you hear John Goodman got busted for drugs? He was crossing the border looking really spaced out. They pulled him over to do a strip search. When he dropped his drawers they found 50 pounds of crack. :D

...now, back to our regularly scheduled topic...

[Beaf]

I know I can't compete with you guys, but I enjoy the board so much I wanted to be a part of something stupid! (for a change....)

Just to finish, at least here this:
You know when you go to a movie and that that a big fat dude that's condemmed to die in the PURPLE MILE*, as they call it, is about ..... to die (no!), well, you know at that exact moment, when everybody in the theater leaves their pop-corn to hold the hand of their girlfriend....? The total silence... no munching nor sipping.... You know heh? Well, at that exact moment....... right there.... in the back of the room...... without any advice or preperation..... someone farted.**
One of the [best moments]/[worst fight with my girl] of my life.

I'm Jim Brockman and these were..... my two cents.

_________________________________________
*Movie title cleverly changed here

**True story.Names have been modified, and obviously the actors as well, since that fat dude wouldn't fit in a theater seat

[Taskmaster]

I think I will ingore the "being part of something stupid" comment. I personally don't consider this particualar thread "stupid", although "silly, zany, crazy, weird, sophmoric(?), moronic, and sometimes unrealistic" would all apply.

Obviously I take a certain amount of pride in the stories. I felt some of the last "chapters" I have added to the "epic" (not the silly stuff) were actually pretty good. Not compared to a "real" writer like Ray Bradbury, but not bad for a "common guy." The silly stuff has its moments too, at least and "A" for creative effort. Not many threads can claim to have been around as long (almost two years I think on this one although due to software changes I don't know if the real date it started is still around).

I didn't see "PURPLE MILE*" so I don't know the exact thing you are talking to, but I do know that all creature were made by God, and regarldess of whether your genetic DNA instructs your body to be skinny, short, tall, fat, "ugly", "beautiful" or what have you, doesn't change the fact that we are all the same inside.

I didn't choose to be a tall, normal size white guy. I could have just as easily been born a short, tan Chinese woman. Be thankful for who you are, but don't berate others because you feel somehow superior. I'm sure that "fat" guy (again I didn't see it) didn't wake up one day and say "I want to be really fat so I can be in a movie and people can enjoy making fun of me!"

Just a thought from the "Voice of Reason". Not trying to be mean, and there is no "tone" or attitude in this note. Just trying to give you another side of story. Treat others as you would like to be treated and what a great world this would be.

:D :) :o ;) :(

[LordKhaine]

Leave this thread alone unless you can actually add something to it.

My next post coming soon, as soon as I can get off this crappy P200 and back onto my own comp :(

[Morety]

Actually, the farting part at the silent, intense part of the movie is funny imo.

That shoulda been in another thread, yeah, but think about it. I'd have been laughing mao!

[Beaf]

All right I'll leave it alone....

Just know I'm NOT the kinda guy that bashes people, especially not on the PUF's; I love the people here...
I should have read all the thing before cutting in while the story was in a funny turn.

Don't unload your s**t on me for that. I don't think you're stupid or that this is stupid stuff.

Finally, the fat dude I'm talking about is MY AVATAR!!! Not from the movie. My point was just a fart during an incredibly silent moment. That's all.
Can you guess what I really look like? No? Well, maybe because you never saw me and that it is of no issue here... Black white yellow tall fat short female male or other: it should not matter when thoughts are beyond appearance. I'll leave your story alone and relief my anal phase elsewhere.

[Morety]

Beaf, relieve gas pressure HERE (http://forums.planetunreal.com/showthread.php?threadid=32231)

[Taskmaster]

*Taskmaster remembers when the Off Topic thread was barely visited and a thread would stay on page one for a week or more before being relegated to the heap.

*Taskmaster adds a new "sniffer" mod to his rocket launcher.

*Taskmaster launches a rocket and it immediately flies toward Morety and plows up his rear having detected noxious fumes emitting from his body cavity.

*Taskmaster noticed that Morety enjoyed it for the split second before it exploded, sending his pieces soaring outward in a bloodly and fiery burst.

*Taskmaster doesn't have a good idea for a story yet, so he will have to postpone dying for now...

[LordKhaine]

Still stuck on this POS P200....

[OshadowO]

"Leave this thread alone unless you can actually add something to it. " -LK
"Still stuck on this POS P200...."-LK
*snicker* had to call you on that one LK:p

[Taskmaster]

*Taskmaster walked around the campus of the UWD (Univeristy of Wannabe Doctors).

*Taskmaster notices a sign "PRACTICE PATIENTS NEEDED... $50!" and facing an empty wallet decides to investigate.

*Taskmaster is "examined" by a beautiful young intern. "Man... and they're gonna pay me for this?"

*Taskmaster is greeted by another young intern with a cart full of supplies. "A cast? Sure go for it..."

*Taskmaster's arm is plastered with a cast. It isn't perfect, but that's why they are practicing.

*Taskmaster has the other arm bandaged with various types of adhesive bandaids.

"Ouch!" "Yeeow!" OW!" "Careful!" screams Taskmaster as each bandaid is ripped from his hairy arm with total disregard for his comfort.

"You girls must have skipped the bedside manners class!" remarked Taskmaster. "Course, I'll be glad to give you a lesson!"

"Uh.. wait a minute..." pleaded Taskmaster as one of the young ladies pulled out the small saw used for removing casts.

*Taskmaster fainted as the blade ripped through the still wet plaster and severed his arm.

*Taskmaster woke to a blurry haze, drugged up from the numerous injects that had been practiced on him. One must have been a powerful pain reliever as he felt NO pain.

*Taskmaster barely notice that his leg had been amuptated, his kidneys removed and a fake hip added.

*Taskmaster DID, however, feel it when the rib-spread cracked open his chest!

****

"Hey look at this!" said the medical student as he pried open the dead hand of the cadaver he had been operating on. "Fifty bucks!"

[Morety]

Originally posted by Taskmaster



*Taskmaster noticed that Morety enjoyed it for the split second before it exploded, sending his pieces soaring outward in a bloodly and fiery burst.




Uh, Task, can I ask a favour? Next time can you lube it for me? :D

[Morety]

*Morety strolls up the road, not a care in the world, and sees a beautiful blonde, about 21 years old.

*The blonde smiles brightly at Morety

*Morety smiles back

*Morety next comes across a BJ2000 machine, tm-LiquiD_SiN, on the street corner, which accepts VISA.

*Morety slips in his card

*Morety slips in his ****

*Morety smiles as the machine begins to operate

*The machine starts to feel uncomfortable, as the suction device gets stronger and stronger

*Morety loses his smile, and tries to remove his **** from the now painful, malfunctioning BJ2000.

*Too late, Morety's member has been dismembered.

*Morety lays on the street and cries "Mommy" 12 octaves higher than normal while his blood drains completely from his body.

*Morety shrivels up and dies, this was NOT, however, for the amusement of CHRYSt ;)

[Taskmaster]

Taskmaster walked around the corner of his van, on the side of which is painted "Rapid Repairs, Inc", carrying his tool box.

"Oops, looks like this fell off" noted Taskmaster as he picked up the "Out of Order" sign and placed it on the front of the BJ2000.

Taskmaster opened the back panel of the machine and began to replace the defective pumping mechaism and pressure regulator.

"Good thing I got here when I did...." he commented, "Some one could have gotten really hurt trying to use this thing...

"Hey buddy..." called Taskmaster to the guy lying on the ground nearby. "I put a free credit on this thing and need some one to test it. Feel free..."

Taskmaster got in his repair van and drove off.

[Morety]

*CHRYSt walks up the road and sees a bloody messed crotch of a Morety lying on the sidewalk, and a repair van leaving the scene.

*CHRYSt jiggles the change return thingy.

*Suddenly, into the coin return slot, plops a dismembered member.

*CHRYSt takes a bite

*CHRYSt looks thoughtfully

*"Needs salt"

*CHRYSt throws it onto the sidewalk and walks on


(Hmmm, there's still a free credit...;))

[Taskmaster]

(I have no idea what to write about, but I hate to see this thread once again get lost in oblivion, stuck some where between page 210 and 211, so I will think of something. I'm still waiting for the continuation of the "epic" so that it can be wrapped up. I hate to write the other folks character for fear of pissing them off, but then again, they haven't bothered to read this thread in ages...)






"Hey Bob!" called one of the construction workers as he tightened some bolts. "Wanna take a break?"

"Yea, sure." replied his buddy from the other side of the amusment ride. He was attaching some steel support rods to the main "trunk". "We can finish this up by lunch even with a short break."

"Let's go to the 'StarDeers' over by the entrance." they agreed.


A SHORT TIME LATER...

"Ah Six Frags!" mused Taskmaster as he looked around with a child-like wonder. "Man, I love this place!"

Taskmaster walked through the construction entrance to check in on the newest attraction. He straightened his hard hat as he marvelled at the newest metallic contraption designed to thrill and excite visitors.

"Mr. Taskmaster..." greeted the wide-eyed foreman as he notice Taskmaster approaching. "What can I do for you?"

"I was just wondering when I get to take a ride on this beauty?"

"Uh, I... I don't know if she's ready yet." stammered the foreman still nervous at the prospect of talking to the owner and founder of Six Frags Over Florida, a self-made multi-millionaire. "I had some guys working on the finishing structural issues, but they...they must be on break."

"Great, then they must have finished." Taskmaster said with glee. "Come on... start her up."

"Well, I... I don't know... sir."

"Light her up and hit the music too!" enthused Taskmaster like a little kid on Christmas morning.

The reluctant foreman went to the control room and turned on the juice. The ride light flickered then shined in all their glorious colors - flashing, pulsing, chasing, and hypnotizing - as the music played a mezmerizing tune.

"The Up-Chucker!" declared Taskmaster as the ride shone in all it's glory. Taskmaster walked up the ramp, selected a seat and buckled himself in.

"Start it!' he yelled loudly.

Nothing....

"START IT!" he yelled even louder and the ride began to rotate, faster and faster. It swooshed and whoosed. It whirled and twirled. It shimmied and swayed.

It creaked and groaned. It bent and snapped. It clattered and clanked. The car ripped from the metal fasteners and sailed into the surrounding metal structure erected around the newest amusement.

The foreman hit the emergency stop on the control panel but it was too late. The ride began to brake quickly, sending an acrid stream of smoke, reeking of burnt rubber, into the air as the emergency brakes on the ride violently shuddered it to a halt.

The twisted metal car sat smashed against the metal beam, a shaken, badly hurt Taskmaster limply fell out of the twisted steel and collapsed on the ground in pain.

"W-w-wow!" he stammered breathlessly, "what a ride!"

Bob and Frank returned from their break and surveyed the damaged ride. "I guess we won't be finishing by lunch!"

[Taskmaster]

Taskmaster held the scrapbook in his hands, carefully studying all the fun times captured as small snapshots of time. He couldn't help but chuckle at a few of them.

"Ah the crazy things you do to make others happy!" he thought.

"Been run over, blown apart, crushed, decapitated, cloned, battered and bruised, tie up, tied down, step on, beat down, stab, kicked, thrown and more...." he reminisced.

"But I'm getting old now, and it seems folks just don't care for the old humor. Seems like 'farting', stealing music and gossip have replaced good wholesome fun! :D"

"Well, ever twenty years it seems like what is 'out' comes back 'in.' So I guess I'll check back later." said Taskmaster as he closed the book, sealing in the memories.

He laid the book carefully on the lace-covered table under the porcelin lamp. A silver frame held a picture of Taskmaster with old friends CHRYSt, Tykeal, Zaxxic and others all sitting around the campfire, smiles reflecting in the firelight.

He wonder what life, the greatest of adventures, would bring his way next as he turned off the lamp leaving the memories for another day.

[Morety]

Morety whistled happily as he walked around with his glass jar, collecting samples of fresh dog p00p from the neighbourhood park.

Dee dee dee dee dee went Morety as he filled his jar about 3/4 the way up. Holding it to his nose as he takes a whiff, he nearly gags. This makes him smile happily.

He takes his little jar of dog p00p home with him, and sets it on the kitchen table. Out of a cupboard, he pulled his nitro glycerin.

Very gently he poured the nitro into the same jar with the poop, leaving some space at the top. He gently mixed the p00p and the nitro together.

He cheerfully whistled away while he cracked the glass off a lightbulb, ensuring the filament was still connected. Cutting a hole in the lid to the jar, he inserted the filament and duct taped it in place. He then happily hummed as he screwed the top of the jar back on. The filament oh so close to the nitro/p00p.

Sneaking into Taskmaster's house, he screwed his little device into a light socket, and snuck out.

Across the road, Morety, with his binoculars, watches in eager anticipation as Taskmaster reaches for the light switch... :D

[Taskmaster]

"Awww sh*t!" screamed Taskmaster as he flipped the light switch on, "and I mean that literally!" Taskmaster danced around the room stomping out bits of burning dung.

Task turned on the table lamp and surveyed the damage. Aside from the acrid buring smell, and the reeking dog crap smell, it didn't smell too bad. And if you ignored the brown splatters and burnt patch on the rug and walls, it didn't look to bad.

"If I get my hands on the moron that did this..." raged Taskmaster, "he won't know which end to crap out cause I'll rip him a new one!"

Taskmaster grabbed the phone book from the bureau drawer and flipped it open. "Cleaners, cleaners.... ah here's one!"

"Hello, is this Morety's Carpet Cleaners?" inquired Taskmaster after dialing the phone. "Do you guys clean up, uh, shall we say 'after dogs?'"

"OK, thanks, I'll expect you then." he said having given his address and details.