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Jing
24th Aug 2000, 06:46 PM
[Cue cheesy-ass jungle music]
[Spin camera around DM-Peak]

This is the story...
Of 8 |337 deathmatch Bots...
Alarik...
Archon...
Ivana...
Nikita...
Raynor...
Cryss...
Diablo...
And
Xan...

Marooned on DM-Peak... with no way off this island... they must compete for scarce resources that respawn infrequently, and each week they must vote one of their own to respawn off the peak... and the remaining bot...will be GODlike.

Week 1

Alarik - "Ya you know, I mean everything is cool but... not everyone is getting along, you know? I mean the guys want some action, but the chicks ain't putting out. And then Xan is always off on his own, rambling about being the 'Apple and Potato [ed: thx boom =)]' or something like that. I mean, he's the best well off with the power suit and everything, but the bitch... can I say bitch? Is this a family show? Anyway, the bitch just camps the shield belt. I mean really. But I don't anyone likes that Diablo guy. He just tells everyone to '**** off'"

Diablo - "No, **** off"

Ivana - "I don't think the male commandos understand our situation. I mean, they just chase us all around the map trying to 'get some'. It's gotten to the point where we need to get the quad damage to make them back off...but they always snicker about a spanking. I mean fer chrissakes, look at them drooling over there... and right on top of the shock cores. Don't they know that's dangerous? *sigh* And speaking of Cryss, can you belive that ho? We were trying to figure out how to share the Big Keg O' Health, and she says she should get ALL of it cuz she has pale skin and needs it. What the F, man? Screw 'em. And **** Diablo."

Archon - "Ya I'm the new guy. All the other bots call me 'newbie'. I take it in stride though, you know? You can't show resentment, or you'll be the first to go. I'm just trying to get in good with everyone... I give cryss the healh packs, Alarik my ammo. I always sneak the armor over to Ivana. Good god that gal is hot. I even tried getting good with Diablo, I mean at first it he was like you know, 'Oh hey, what's up' but then the 'tude set in, and he's all up in my face with the 'No, **** off' and I'm like, dude I'm just wondering if you want some RL ammo. Freak. But like I said, I kinda get the feeling that things are against me... so I'm doing something kinda sneaky... I'm inviting some of the others, Ivana (good god she's hot) and Raynor, over to my place - I'm camped out by the plasma. We're going to band together, a voting collective...a clan, if you will."

This week's Redeemer Challenge - Strangelove CTF Diamond Sword

Announcer - Ok guys, it's the end of the first week, and time for our first redeemer challenge. As you may have noticed, we've strapped each of you to a 5 kiloton low yield nuclear warhead mounted on a TD-7iXCV Cruise Missile with a 1000 Mile effective range, more than enough for today's challenge. The rules are simple. First person to fly from the top of Red base, into blue base, grab the flag, and then return here for a successful capture not only wins immunity, but a relic of regeneration! If you explode, you will respawn here and be out of the match. You each have a standard issue 10 mm Caseless 'Enforcer' with 35 rounds of ammunition for the duration of this challenge. Ready? Good luck! GO!

[all contestants blast off]
Diablo - No, **** off
<Diablo killed himself>
<Alarik was vaporized by Diablo's redeemer!>
<Nikita was vaporized by Diablo's redeemer!>
Xan - You die to Easily
Archon - Same Team!
Ivana - Roger that!
[Cryss fires on Ivana's redeemer... Ivana's redeemer explodes]
<Ivana killed herself>
Cryss - Sit Down!
Ivana - Die bitch!
Raynor - Yeeha!
Xan - Boom!
[Archon fires on Cryss]
Announcer - Head shot!
Archon - You like that?
Xan - I've got the flag!
Raynor - Enemy Flag carrier is here!
[Raynor fires on Xan...misses]
[Xan returns fire...Raynor's redeemer explodes]
<Raynor has killed himself>
Xan - I am the Alpha and the Omega!
Archon - Incoming!
<Xan has captured the flag>
Announcer - Xan wins the match!

Well now, it's up to the rest of you 7 to vote one of you to take the eternal respawn off of peak
Alarik - That bitch Diablo cost me the win today. He should '**** off'
Archon - We decided that frankly, we don't want to deal with Diablo
Ivana - That bitch-ass saltwater ho Cryss
Xan - I am the Alpha and the Omega
Diablo - No, **** off
...
Announcer - And the vote is...Diablo. The server has spoken. Log off.
Diablo - No, **** off
Announcer sets mode: +b diablo (no, you '**** off')

Tune in next week.....

Bozo=MD=
24th Aug 2000, 06:50 PM
Yeah baby, yeah!
Gimme more! I want more! :D

OshadowO
24th Aug 2000, 06:57 PM
LMAO too funny jing:)

WAnk
24th Aug 2000, 07:02 PM
OMFG you rock my nutz jing :D BWAHAHAHAH THAT IS ****ING HILARIOUS!!!!!! :D

Rodzilla
24th Aug 2000, 07:03 PM
ROFLMAO! That's hillarious jing. What happens next week? I love the redeemer thing, lol. And Diablo was funny. :)

[PuF]Neo_Skinz
24th Aug 2000, 07:05 PM
Hehe, thats the funnyist thing I've read in a long time!

Nice one Jing http://forums.planetunreal.com/images/icons/icon14.gif

gramps
24th Aug 2000, 07:19 PM
too funny!! more! more!! :)

The Dopefish
24th Aug 2000, 07:23 PM
I was almost ROTFLMAO for real! :D

Jing
24th Aug 2000, 08:56 PM
[Cue cheesy Jungle music]

Next week...on, PuFVivor (thx Troll =)

{cue Blair Witch-esque camera footage)
(Alariks feet in view, running)
Archon: Get him! KILL THAT NALI SOB!
Nikita: Enemy is here!
(running foot steps; wild camera angles; gun shots)

(Switch to night vision lens; green light)
(Shield-belt room - Ivana's place)
Ivana - Hey...thanks for coming...I just wanted to thank you properly for what you did...

(cut to dark room)
Raynor - What the hell? Xan is here too? You skin-cheating llama bitch!
Xan - Witness my erection!
(cut to Peak Courtyard; Entire group in Semicricle with Shockrifles)
(overlay PuFVivor logo; Stop music, blank screen)

Are you getting enough?

(next episode this weekend! =)

Game0rz
24th Aug 2000, 08:59 PM
heh, i could of went into this thread eariler, and i didnt because it was long, and i didnt feel like reading it all then, but now i read it and its pretty good, keep it up! :D

[PuF]Neo_Skinz
24th Aug 2000, 09:00 PM
lol

Rodzilla
24th Aug 2000, 10:14 PM
lol. nice additions on the preview. Now the real thing da*n it!! ;)

Big giB
24th Aug 2000, 11:12 PM
LOL! TOO FUNNY! BTW didyu get that "No, f*ck off" line from Dopey? Or is it the other way around?

[PuF]Neo_Skinz
25th Aug 2000, 12:48 AM
No the 'No f*ck off' phrase comes from a bot named Diablo that used to pop up in #PU from time to time. Doesnt anymore though, I dont know who made it though.

Basically it 2 actions when you said a certian 2 lines:
e.g.
<[PuF]Neo_Skinz> Hi Diablo
<Diablo> Hi, whats up?
or
<[PuF]Neo_Skinz> op me
<Diablo> No, f*ck off

Big giB
25th Aug 2000, 01:37 AM
Haha, the idea behind that bot makes me laugh.

~Cobra~
25th Aug 2000, 01:58 AM
omfriggingoodness!!!!! jing man.. you never cease to amaze me ;)

RizMan|PuF
25th Aug 2000, 02:16 AM
Your the man Jing :)
That's one of the funniest things I've ever read. Keep them coming

Jing
26th Aug 2000, 03:35 PM
[Cue Jungle-Rave music]
[Spin camera around DM-Peak; Zoom into courtyard; entire group assembled with shock rifles; over lay logo]

Week 2

Alarik - "Everything has gotten a lot less...tense... since Diablo left. And everyone is starting to get into little groups to vote... I mean, it's a little obvious when Ivana, Archon, and Raynor all have the same Team Color, you know? But I can sense that might fall apart; there's been some beef between Raynor and Xan... So Raynor wants Xan gone, but Ivana hates Cryss's guts so she wants her gone, and Archon, you know, he's Ivana's little whipped bot-toy. But Raynor's got it bad for Cryss. So it will be interesting to watch how this all turns out. If I play it right, who knows..."

[night time; a darkened flak gun room; panting]
<Cryss ate a load of Raynor's dripping goo>
Cryss - I'm sorry, did I blow your head apart?
Raynor - Oh yeeeeeah!
Xan - Witness my erection!
[short pause]
Raynor - What the f**k? Xan is here too? You skin-cheating llama b**ch!
Cryss - Hey now, there's more than enough of me to go around... at the same time
Xan - On my way
Raynor - ....freaky shock-h0
Cryss - Base is uncovered!
[camera shifts - floats across map]
[courtyard - Raynor is asleep on ammo plateau; Archon is not in Plasma gun hut]
[Minigun path - Nikita is asleep]
[Ripper room - Raynor is not here]
[Rocket launcher room - Xan is not here]

[Shield Belt room - Ivana and Archon]
[Green lens nightvision lens]
Archon - Wow, Ivana, you look very pretty with the shield belt...all glowy...
Ivana - Hey thanks for coming. I just wanted to thank you properly for what you did.
Archon - Hey....Same team! Got your back!
Ivana - Well...
[Ivana takes off shield belt]
Archon - Whoa...hey you aren't wearing anything under the shield belt!
Ivana - Are you ready? Click [fire] when ready.
Archon - Incoming! Red leader, I'm in position!
Ivana - Hang in there!

[Flak room]
Raynor - Boom!
Xan - Ha Ha Ha.
Cryss - gg
Raynor - [Red jack - disconnected]
Xan - relic of Regen; I can go all night bay-bee! Try a bigger gun!
Cryss - Engage according to operational parameters!

Archon - "Ya, so that night, which was right after the CTF-Diamond sword challenge, I think that was a big surprise for everyone. I mean, we heard what was going on with Raynor and Xan and Cryss... they aren't all THAT far from the shield belt room. And after that, Raynor and Xan kept camping weapons...they'd shoot at each other every now and then, claiming their finger had slipped. The rest of us would yell 'try turning the safety ON' But that didn't work. And I was pretty surprised with what happened with Ivana... good god that bot is hot! Did you get it all on tape? <camera nods vigorously> Send me a copy, ok? Ya anyway, I think our little clan has decided to vote Cryss off... but I'm not so sure about Raynor. And it's funny, he used to wear a red team color skin, but now it's yellow..."

Cryss - "What, about that night? Business. Now I have my own bot-toy voting collective. I own Raynor and I've weakened Ivana in doing so. It's hard to tell with Xan, but I think he'll vote the way I want. I mean, hey, ivana was taking care of business too, I could hear it. I'm only worried about Alarik and Nikita... if you're not part of the solution, then you're part of the problem. If everything goes smooth, Ivana will be off this island and respawning in the water with the fishies. I might even be able to redeem Archon...silly bot keeps giving me health packs..."

Xan - "I 0wn"

This week's challenge - Kill the Nali on DM-Bathroom

Announcer - This week's challenge is simple; We let a nali priest loose in DM bathroom somewhere. You guys have to kill him, take his head, and flush it. Winner gets immunity and relic of strength. You have free access to all your weapons for this challenge, and should you die, you will respawn at a random location. Also, we gave the nali an instagib rifle. Translocators are activated. Good luck!

Nali - Habouji!
Archon - Got your back (bathtub)
Ivana - Roger that (sink - side)
<Ivana got the sniper rifle>
Alarik - Control point is secure (mirror top)
<Raynor got the redeemer>
Xan - I am the Alpha and the Omega (toilet rim)
<Raynor fires redeemer>
<Xan was vaporized by Raynor's Redeemer!>
Raynor - Die b*t*h!
<Nikita got the flak cannon>
Nikita - Enermy is here! (toilet paper)
<Nikita was electrified by the Nali's enhanced shock rifle>
Nali - Qupada!
Ivana - Teamsay(Archon) - Heading for lamp
Archon - Teamsay(Ivana) - Got it; enemy sighted, on my way.
<Cryss fires with Ripper... misses>
<Nali fires at Cryss with Enhanced shock rifle... misses>
<Alarik got the rocket launcher...got the sniper rifle>
<Nikita got the bio-rifle>
<Xan got the plasma Rifle>
Nali - Mouhaga!
<Nali fires enhanced shock rifle at Xan>
<Xan was electrified by Nali's enhanced shock rifle>
Raynor - Nice.
<Ivana Impact hammers Cryss>
<Cryss left a small crater>
Ivana - You like that?
<Raynor is now on Yellow team>
<Alarik waves to Nikita>
<Nikita does a mid air hump>
<Alarik does a mid air hump>
<Cryss got the shock rifle>
<Cryss does a throat slash at Ivana>
<Ivana put a bullet through Cryss's head>
Announcer - Headshot!
Archon - Enemy flag carrier is here (ground)
<Archon dodges enhanced shock rifle blast>
<Raynor fires minigun - misses>
<Nikita humps Alarik>
<Archon fires enforcer at Nali - Misses>
Ivana - Got your back
<Ivana put a bullet through Nali's head>
Announcer - Headshot!
<Xan fires redeemer>
<Archon was vaporized by Xan's redeemer>
Xan - You die too easily!
<Alarik put a bullet through Xan's head while humping Nikita>
<Ivana Translocates>
<Ivana was telefragged by Cryss>
Cryss - You like that?
<Cryss grabs Nali's head>
Cryss - I've got the Head!
Raynor - Ha Ha Ha. Got your back.
<Cryss flushes the head>

Cryss wins the match!
Cryss - Bite me!

Server Council
Announcer - It is time to vote one of your fellow bots off of the map. A lot of stuff has happened this week, a lot of changes... Alarik and Nikita wearing Green, Ivana and Archon wearing Red, and now Raynor wearing yellow with Cryss and Xan. Raynor, do you think this will affect your chances on this island?

Raynor - Bite me.

Announcer - Ok, let's all vote!

Alarik - Raynor. His pansy azz hasn't done anything, he just mopes about Cryss and rages at Xan. Plus I think he's impotent.

Archon - Raynor. Well, We were going to vote cryss, but she has immunity...so we think it's better to get rid of the traitor.

Raynor - Xan. B****-*** M*****-******, I wish I'd impact hammered his candy azz off the map already.

Xan - Raynor. I own.

Cryss - Ivana. EAT IT B*YA**H!

Ivana - Raynor. Good for nothing basturd.

Nikita - Diablo. Oh wait he's gone. Um... Cryss, she's kind of an arro... oh I can't? Well damn it... fine, fine, Xan. He moans funny.

Announcer - The server has spoken. Raynor, please log off the map. Do you have anything to say?

Raynor quit (I don't need any of you m0's, I was in Starcraft, so screw-you guys!)

The Dopefish
26th Aug 2000, 03:50 PM
LOL! Raynor was a bitch from week one. ;)

Arcturus
26th Aug 2000, 04:37 PM
ROFLMAO! u da man Jing! :)

[PuF]Neo_Skinz
26th Aug 2000, 07:55 PM
lol @ Jing, too funny.

gramps
26th Aug 2000, 08:56 PM
ROFLMAO! great stuff, Jing! :D

WAnk
26th Aug 2000, 09:18 PM
BWAHAHAHAHAHH!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

gooooooooo archon, get some!!!!!!

ROFL!!!!!! AKSD:FLSAFKJASJLF HAHAHAAHHA!!!!!!!!!!!

/me sets mode +awesome ^Jing^|surviving

Kristina|BFH
27th Aug 2000, 05:08 PM
What a bunch of sluts you've created there. ;) Me likey!

WAnk
27th Aug 2000, 07:09 PM
Kristina is a fan of sluts lol ;) she should pop by SLUTcon :D i will be there, that is one slut at least ;)

Kristina|BFH
27th Aug 2000, 09:50 PM
You're the biggest slut we have in PuF Wank! j/k ;)

Game0rz
27th Aug 2000, 09:55 PM
SLUTcon 0wnz j00 all!

Kristina|BFH
27th Aug 2000, 09:59 PM
Alright! I thought I knew all about sluts but I dont know - what is SLUTcon?

LordKhaine
27th Aug 2000, 11:27 PM
SLUTcon is a LAN party in the US. Look at the thread on the UT section :p

garrett
28th Aug 2000, 01:53 AM
err lmao that is hilarious

Sam_The_Man
28th Aug 2000, 05:18 AM
ROTFLMAOL!

Keep it coming Jing!

Jing
29th Aug 2000, 01:21 AM
Page three already =)

I'd better post the commercial and week 3 soon =)

Promotional consideration for PuF Vivor by:

CoCo|PuFs - Breakfast of godlikes! Hey! Kosak likes it!

The Soundoff - Funny pictures and crap... give them a visit and SOUNDOFF!! http://www.planetunreal.com/soundoff

Rumor has it that week 3's challenge will be LMS... and there is a considerable chance than Xan will be booted off the map... also more surprises await!

Rodzilla
29th Aug 2000, 05:46 PM
ROFLMAO! N1's Jing! Keep em coming! :)

Big giB
29th Aug 2000, 08:30 PM
ROFLMAO! Keep it coming Jing! :)

Vanilla
31st Aug 2000, 10:37 PM
wwwoooooooooooooooo
/me wants more.

i vote cryss off. (die bi*ch) :)

Skunk
1st Sep 2000, 11:49 AM
Who won?? Do they get a million dollars?? LOL.

Mute
1st Sep 2000, 04:03 PM
Nikita has to go: I'm sure she's actually a secret m0tard. She's just been laying low under the radar for now but I sure her llama'ness will rear its ugly head.

Rodzilla
1st Sep 2000, 05:22 PM
Down with Nikita!! m0-tards are bad enough but ones that lie about their m0-tartedness deserve to be punished and tortured!!!

trinity
1st Sep 2000, 06:15 PM
you are a f*cking genius. my silly little ho has been up to good work!!!!!!!

Selerox
2nd Sep 2000, 05:35 AM
OMG this show rules! :D Thanks for the advert too Jing :)

SkummyB|BuF
2nd Sep 2000, 05:47 AM
You Rock Jing =)

[Ci]Mazza
2nd Sep 2000, 12:10 PM
No way Xan should go, he's too funny :)

Mute
2nd Sep 2000, 03:01 PM
This thread is a classic already...

hal
2nd Sep 2000, 04:49 PM
Very funny

Mute
4th Sep 2000, 01:09 PM
I need my PuFVivor fix...

Jing
4th Sep 2000, 04:36 PM
Ok, here is my promise to you guys:

I have a midterm Tuesday morning (@8:30am!! Physics!!) so I wont be in a very happy mood, so the episode will suck. But I will write Week3 this week!!!!!! If not tuesday, then wednesday. And if not wednesday, then Thursday. And If i write it thursday, it'll be extra funny and make even less sense, since I'm going out to a bar-club with friends again and I'll be drunk when i type it up (probably something like an ewok kills everyone with an enhanced minigun) =) Unless I pass out on the floor. Kinda hard to type like that.

But Coming up:
Week 3 Challenge - LMS on DM - I Forget what it is called, for Immunity and an Instagib rifle.

More sex, more violence, more surprises, and a nali cow explodes! Also...someone returns from the eternal-respawn!! Who is it? What is this bot's agenda???

~Cobra~
4th Sep 2000, 06:14 PM
wth.. midterms already!?!?!?

i just started school on thursday... wth... you crazy man

garrett
4th Sep 2000, 08:16 PM
crap i start school tomorrow(Tuesday) i am sad, lol but it will be nice to see more of my friends again, i wish school was 1 day of hanging out with friends

SkummyB|BuF
8th Sep 2000, 12:52 PM
*Bump!*

this thread must never die =)

Jing
9th Sep 2000, 01:54 AM
[Cue 'Who Wants To Be A Millionaire' intro music]
[Pan across DM-Peak]
[Millionaire music is distorted, promptly cut... hyper fast Survivor theme plays]
[Overlay Logo]

Week 3

Who is left?
Archon
Alarik
Xan
Nikita
Cryss
and Ivana...

Who will leave this week??

Archon - "Oh my god it has been a long week. I haven't slept at all. Who knew Ivana was a total Nympho? I mean, Christ, she keeps chasing me all over the map shouting 'Gimme some sugar, baby!' How am I supposed to get anything done? I can't sleep either...I mean, sheesh...
[Show Ivana Interview footage - Ivana Grabs camera and shakes camera wildly shouting, "Archon needs more VIAGRA! BRING MORE VIAGRA DAMNIT!"] Aside from that, a lot of other weird stuff has been going on too. Take Xan for instance. You may have noticed, he's walking around naked now, except for this mask. We are supposed to call him 'Darth Xan - Sith lord of Alpha and Omega.' Personally, I think he's lost it. And I don't think he's ever been outside his power armor either; I mean, look at him, he's so white we could probably reflect a signal to UFO's off his skin. I tell you, he and Cryss go well together. Oh god. Ivana's coming this way. Make this interview last longer, please! I'll make it worth your while! Pleeeeeeeease!"

Alarik - <looks at Xan; shudders> "'nuff said about the m0-bot. There's been a lot happening this week... for starters, |BFH (Bots From Hell) members myself and Nikita have met with Ivana and Archon, when they weren't... uh... screwing around... and we've come to a conclusion..."

[Alarik, Archon, Ivana, Nikita in shieldbelt room]
Archon - Ok, First rule of PuFVivor is... XAN is a m0. Second rule of PuFVivor is... XAN IS A m0...Thir
Alarik - Shut it.
Nikita - Look, we're all here for a reason... This week another one of us has to go. And it stands to reason that the most offensive should go.
Ivana - That would be Cryss. Case closed.
Alarik - Well, There is another...Xan.
Archon - Yes, Always there are two...er...
Nikita - I think we can agree that Cryss is mostly harmless right now. Xan is more skilled than she is...
Archon - And smells worse now that he is....ewwww nekkid.
Ivana - Well...
Alarik - How about this then? All four of us vote for Xan off the map unless he wins the challenge... Otherwise we vote Cryss off.

Alarik - "And that plan got approval even from Ivana. Since Neither I nor Nikita have any particular worry of being voted out, we're planning to play this week's challenge more along the lines of denying Xan a victory. I think one way or another, his days are numbered... there was that 'visitor' who snuck on earlier this week. You wouldn't happen to know anything about how he got into the server, do you? well?"

[Night time. Ripper room.]
[Inky darkness climbs onto ledge, picks up ripper]
[Unknown pauses under torch... a black, distorted skin! Runs and hides]

[Day time... Archon is running from Ivana screaming "I need to rest!"]
[Xan pickups rocket launcher]
Xan - I am the Alpha and the Omega!
[Unknown sneaks behind Xan, and Imapact hammers Xan!]
Raynor - You like that? Let's Rock!
[Xan lands in courtyard, runs into castle]
[Raynor jumps down into courtyard, runs after Xan]
Raynor - Squeal Xan, Squeal!
[Xan runs past flak room, onto pathway]
[Raynor runs onto pathway, grabs thighpads]
[Xan sneaks from lower pathway, impact hammers Raynor off path]
Xan - Objective destroyed
Raynor - [Red jack - connection refused by server]
[Hydralisk fires needle at Xan - hits, Xan loses 15 Health]
[Xan flees; Xan picked up minigun]
[Mutalisk; fires Glave Wurm - Misses]
<From IRC (Raynor): How d'ya like THEM apples? They're on loan from my Honey Kerrigan...queen of blades, maybe you've heard of her? MuAHAHAHAHAHAHA>
[Xan Fires minigun at Mutalisk; Mutalisk explodes in blood]
Xan - I just slaughtered that guy!
[Hydralisk burrows]
Xan - I'm under attack!
Archon - Ivana! Please! I love you...but....I NEED TO SLEEP!
[Hyrdalisk unburrows...Hydralisk is confused by thigh pads]
Hydralisk - KkkkKsksskkkhshsshhhkkk?
[Xan Fires at Hydralisk with Rocket Launcher; Hydralisk explodes]
Xan - Yeeha!

Xan - "Witness my erection."

Cryss - "Why does everyone hate me? I am soooooo misunderstood! I was just trying to be friendly and nice to Xan, but now he doesn't even want talk to me! No one does! I just know Ivana is plotting something against me with her loyal, dog-like companion Archon... and Nikita and Alarik are up to something too... what is a poor girl supposed to do? Everyone is against me! And I didn't do anything! I mean, sure, I did ask for the Big Keg O' Health...but I found it first! Finders keepers right? The others all hate me! They get rid of my lover Raynor...twice. It's all that Ivana's fault. *sob* That....BEEEETCH! I'm gonna get that Ivana! And that queen of kerrigan...ice..skating.... whoever she is, I'm coming after you!"

This week's Challenge - LMS-Curse][
Announcer - This week, the challenge is standard Last Man Standing on DM-Curse ][. Last man standing is simple... the last bot standing is this week's winner, getting immunity and an instagib rifle! No translocators, two lives each. Good luck and aim straight!

[Xan picked up shield belt]
[Alarik got the minigun]
[Nikita got the pulse rifle, the ripper]
[Cryss got the sniper rifle]
[Cryss put a bullet through Archon's head]
Cryss - I'm sorry, did I blow your head apart?
[Cryss was ripped to shreds by Ivana's Flak cannon]
Ivana - Only I give him head!
[Xan got the Shock rifle]
[Nikita was electrified by Xan's shock rifle]
Nikita - Enemy is here.
Alarik - I need backup!
Archon - On my way.
[Cryss got the GES Bio Rifle]
[Ivana got the damage amplifier]
[Xan rocket jumps; hides on top of map]
[Nikita got the Flak cannon]
[Ivana fires ripper at Cryss]
[Ivana Killed herself]
[Ivana ripped a chunk out of Alarik with the ripper]
Alarik - Same team you idiot!
[Cryss fires at Ivana with Bio Rifle secondary]
[Ivana ate a load of Cryss' dripping green goo]
[Cryss killed herself]
Announcer - Cryss is out of the match! Ivana is out of the match!
Cryss - Ivana, you must like to eat the goo!
Ivana - Die bitch!
[Archon was ripped to shreds by Nikita's Flak cannon]
Nikita - oops.
Archon - nice.
Alarik - Ha Ha Ha.
Nikita - Boom!
[Xan Fires shock combo into rifle room]
[Nikita was ripped apart by Xan's Shockwave]
[Alarik loses 90 health]
Alarik - Xan you llama cheating camping son of-
[Xan fires Enforcer at Alarik]
[Xan riddles alarik's corpse full of holes with the Enforcer]
Announcer - This week's winner: Xan!


Announcer - now comes the hardest part of the week. One of you must leave us. It's a difficult choice, but it will ensure that the most godlike bot will be the sole remaining PuFVivor. Make your votes

Alarik - Cryss. A deal is a deal.
Nikita - Cryss. <shrugs>
Archon - Ivana. My...er.... Boomslang is starting to breakdown from overuse!
Ivana - Cryss. "Bye Bye Bye biyatch"
Xan - Nikita. I will make Alarik my bitch.
Cryss - Ivana. She's a ho, and you know it!

Announcer - The server has spoken. Cryss, do you have any last words before you logoff?

Cryss quit (I hate you m0's. I wouldn't piss on you if you were on fire)

Who is next? Tune in for Week 4...

Jing
9th Sep 2000, 02:00 AM
I almost forgot (no....wait...I did forget...a cow was supposed to explode)



Cow - m00000
Ash - Let me tell you something; You ain't leading but two people: Jack and ****. And Jack just left town.
Cow - m00000!
[Ash shoots nali cow with shot gun; Nali cow explodes]
Ash - Good. Bad. I'm the guy with the gun.

(If you haven't seen Army of Darkness, i'd recommend renting it if you can...check under 'cult classics' if not in action or comedy ... you'll recognize many one-liners and similarities between the movie and various FPS games =)

This...is my [b]BOOMSTICK.....

garrett
9th Sep 2000, 02:17 AM
jing lmao, XAN owns he is a camper rofl

Rodzilla
9th Sep 2000, 07:09 PM
Yet another great PuFvivor episode. I love this thread. :) You should copyright this and sell it to one of those TV stations that are going to have gaming stuff on it. :)

Big giB
10th Sep 2000, 11:41 PM
Xan, you suck!

Sam_The_Man
11th Sep 2000, 07:21 AM
:D:):D:)

But what were those Hydra/Basilisk things?

Rodzilla
11th Sep 2000, 02:50 PM
Both of those are from one of the best games ever - Starcraft.

Hydralisks - Alien things that spit green spikes
Mutalisks were flying alien things that shot boomerang type swords. :)

desperado
11th Sep 2000, 03:23 PM
Can we vote next time for the one to be booooooted?:)

Harm|PuF
11th Sep 2000, 04:02 PM
What a frikkin riot :)

Jing
12th Sep 2000, 07:24 PM
*Bump*

=) Yes you can vote who you want to go next... but they might not necessarily BE the one who gets red-jacked off the map =)

Remaining Bots
Archon
Alarik
Nikita
Ivana
Xan

Remember, the sole surviving bot gets Godlike status and all stats dialed up to maximum. And hoppy behavior. =)

Ok, ok, and a trip to Disneyland. But that's it. They might camp with a sniper rifle on top of the triple wheel thingy, and you do NOT want to be in sight if that happens...=)

Big giB
17th Sep 2000, 03:35 AM
Its fallin behind :(

garrett
17th Sep 2000, 04:16 AM
XAN needs to live! lol

Rodzilla
17th Sep 2000, 08:31 AM
*BUMP**BUMP**BUMP**BUMP**BUMP**BUMP**BUMP**BUMP**BUMP**BUMP*
This thread is dying!

Sam_The_Man
17th Sep 2000, 10:01 AM
Jing has gone to Disneyland himself, fewls. Anyway, just to keep in the spirit of things...

*SP*... I mean, *BUMP*.

Rodzilla
17th Sep 2000, 10:23 AM
Lol @ sam. I like your sig. Disney Land is fun!:)

garrett
23rd Sep 2000, 11:47 PM
sorry just trying to keep it alive :D

Rodzilla
24th Sep 2000, 11:38 AM
*BUMP* *BUMP* *BUMP* *BUMP* *BUMP* *BUMP* *BUMP* *BUMP* *BUMP* *BUMP* *BUMP* *BUMP* *BUMP* *BUMP* *BUMP* *BUMP* *BUMP* *BUMP* *BUMP* *BUMP* *BUMP* *BUMP* *BUMP*

M-M-M-M-M-MONSTER BUMP!!

Big giB
24th Sep 2000, 01:26 PM
Bumping Spree!!! But when is Jing comin back?

Jing
25th Sep 2000, 12:13 AM
*bump*

I am back =) Thanks for keeping the torch burning.
I'm not at disneyland yet...soon though, soon my young apprentice we will reveal ourselves to the disney...and then shall our revenge be complete.......

How much money do i get for planting red team's flag on top of the matterhorn? =)

seriously though...I'm feeling kind of sick right now...mild fever, nausea, and upset stomach... And moreover, I just found out that my grandmother passed away while i was in europe. So It will be a little longer until this story continues. Thanks for the bumps guys =)

Rodzilla
30th Sep 2000, 11:03 PM
Sorry Jing. Have fun at disney land!
*bump* ;)

garrett
30th Sep 2000, 11:49 PM
lol i was just going to do that

BUMP

Rodzilla
30th Sep 2000, 11:56 PM
Ok garrett, you've taken this too far! Take that out of your sig!!

garrett
1st Oct 2000, 12:59 AM
woohoo it was funny and still is :D

Rodzilla
1st Oct 2000, 01:05 AM
BAH!!

Jing
1st Oct 2000, 12:15 PM
Oh right, new episode....uh...... Xan instagibs everyone in a drunken rage. end of story. Jk =)

Coming soon!
Survivors:
Xan
Archon
Alarik
Nikita
Ivana

Next Week: The Pirate Ship RUMIKO!
And upcoming challenge: FFA-DM Hyperblast ...Xan's home court. Who will be kicked off this week? Who is your favorite bot? And will it still be around next week?????

garrett
1st Oct 2000, 06:50 PM
XAN will live forever

Rodzilla
1st Oct 2000, 08:42 PM
ROFL. We want a real episode!;)

Krypton|BuF
2nd Oct 2000, 05:25 AM
*Bump*

And, keep em coming, Jing!!

ROTFLMAO all day...

Krypton|BuF
3rd Oct 2000, 10:51 PM
another bump

JuiceEggsMcKenna
3rd Oct 2000, 11:29 PM
I liked the appearance by Ash :)

Toolshed!

Rodzilla
4th Oct 2000, 04:23 PM
This thread seems to be way off the bump scale!;)

*BUMP*!!!

garrett
4th Oct 2000, 09:16 PM
*yawn* more homework

BUMP #2

Big giB
24th Oct 2000, 11:02 PM
*BUMP* Yo Jing, you back yet?

Rodzilla
25th Oct 2000, 04:43 PM
OMG! I forgot about this thread!

[b]*BUMP* *BUMP* *BUMP* *BUMP* *BUMP* *BUMP* *BUMP* *BUMP* *BUMP* *BUMP* *BUMP* *BUMP* *BUMP* *BUMP* *BUMP* *BUMP* *BUMP* *BUMP* *BUMP* *BUMP* *BUMP* *BUMP* *BUMP* *BUMP* *BUMP* *BUMP* *BUMP* *BUMP* *BUMP* *BUMP* *BUMP* *BUMP* *BUMP* *BUMP* *BUMP* *BUMP* *BUMP* *BUMP* *BUMP* *BUMP* *BUMP* *BUMP* *BUMP* *BUMP* *BUMP* *BUMP* *BUMP* *BUMP* *BUMP* *BUMP* *BUMP* *BUMP* *BUMP* *BUMP* *BUMP* *BUMP* *BUMP* *BUMP* *BUMP* *BUMP* *BUMP* *BUMP* *BUMP* *BUMP* *BUMP* *BUMP* *BUMP* *BUMP* *BUMP* *BUMP* *BUMP* *BUMP* *BUMP* *BUMP* *BUMP* *BUMP* *BUMP* *BUMP* *BUMP* *BUMP* *BUMP* *BUMP* *BUMP* *BUMP* *BUMP* *BUMP* *BUMP* *BUMP*

garrett
25th Oct 2000, 08:51 PM
i didn't forget about this thread, as a matter of fact i was gonna bump it the other day but didn't get around to it

Big giB
25th Oct 2000, 10:32 PM
Suuuuuuuure...

Jing
27th Oct 2000, 02:38 AM
ARGH I HATE THIS ****ING AUTO RELOADING BANNER AD **** IT"S REALLY PISSING ME OFF

ok...

Sorry guys, i've been meaning to write up new episodes... i have the ideas all down, i just haven't had the time... trying to have a social life, keep up in school work, and try to find a new lady. not easy.

plus i totalled my car wednesday, i have a biochem midterm i haven't studied for at all as a result on friday, and a chinese history essay due monday. I am seriously at an all time new low point in my life. I'll have it soon, thanks for the bumps and patience!

JuiceEggsMcKenna
22nd Nov 2000, 11:34 PM
How'd your exam go Jing?




/me taps fingers impatiently...

WAnk
29th Jan 2001, 05:03 PM
auuudddiiiiooooooodiiiiaaaawweddddeeeeooooodeeeeooooddddiiiiieeeeeeooooooodiiiiiii

dun dun dun! dun dun dun!!!!!!

so, I figure we should start this up again, anyone want to take action? :D Jing, I am looking in your direction ;) ah well, if all else fails I will try to throw something together, but I don't think I would make a good story teller

Rodzilla
29th Jan 2001, 05:06 PM
WAAAAAAUUUWAAAAAAAAAAAHAAAAAAAAAAA!!!!!!!!

/me looks at Jing:)

the~oreca
30th Jan 2001, 08:36 AM
*bumB*

The new series are starting on TV what abut here??

*buMb*

The Dopefish
15th Feb 2001, 07:53 PM
I thought that when I went looking for this thread that no one had touched it since...the last time it was touched (back in October)...looks like I wasn't paying attention. :)

the~oreca
16th Feb 2001, 02:48 PM
Actualy... I tried to bump it when the 2nd one started but i guess no one cared really.