the story of the starship 'uss eternaty'

[CaSCaDe]

captains log sart date 234567.8:

as this is the first day of my new ship -cuse the other 1 has gone down with the old forums- i have decided to ask if ne of my fellow PuFFeRs would like to join me on our never ending quest.
wile i wait for there responces i walk tru my new ship in search of my second in command Vortex.
when i see him i'll ask him if he has heard of the nw mission ahaed of us.
for now i hope that enought people will add in our eternal quest.
CaSCaDe out.


Captains log suplemantal:

if u want to join us here r the things u need to know.
1. al messages must be in the form of a log entry.
2. you can not make logs like the captains or commander.
3. if a rank has been taken u can not make log like that rank.
4. the story goes as the officers of this ship feel like.
5. u can give the story ne twist u like aslong as it stays interesting!! (so no spamming)

well that is about it!!
o yeah before u enter this story read all the posts so u can see what rank is open!
if your not sure u can always ask for a rank!
CaSCaDe out.

[8-4-7-2]

personal log, stardate 51627,2

I was just assigned to the newest and finest ship in our fleet: The USS Eternaty. As I walk through the endless corridors seeking a rank and mission I can't see anyone of the crew and senior officers. I will talk to the Captain about this...

[CaSCaDe]

Captains log suplamental:

as i have come acros our new addition to our crew -8472-
i hope he would like to accept the rank as tactical officer.
if not he should state his request for an other rank and i'll consider it.

fo now tactical officer 8472, welcome aboard.
CaSCaDe out.

[8-4-7-2]

Tactical Officer's log, stardate 52136,3

I'm now TO on this ship. This is a good position, with prospects for promotion and I'm looking forward to my upcoming taks. During Captain Cascade's absence I'm the acting Captain, as we still don't have an approbriate crew!
I will send a message to central command and asks for more people.

TO's log supplemental

I noticed a problem concerning our ship's name! Shouldn't that be "USS Eternity". Perhaps the Captain typed this wrong

Computer: end log. Tactical Officer Lt.Cmd. 8472 out.

[MoyDoy]

MoyDoy´s log, stardate: 850402.5

Ex-evil spam pirate MoyDoy asks for permission to join the crew of USS Etarnaty (great name, the typo should stay)

[SkummyB|BuF]

Skummiesters personal log stardate: 31337

My shuttle craft has crashlanded on a nearby asteriod, I am currently requesting permission to join the good ship USS Etarnaty.

[8-4-7-2]

USS Etarnaty's log. TO and Acting Captain 8472. Stardate 35657.2

The ship is still in the Veredian III spacedock and we I'm waiting for new orders.
A new crewmen is willing to join. He is a spam pirate calling himself MoyDoy. If the Captain doesn't decide s.th. else I make him our new science officer with the rank of a Lieutenant Commander. Welcome on board.

Stardate 35687.1. Supplemental

We received a distress signal from the Arkanis system. Skumboy crashed on a small asteroid and wants to join us.
However I have no permission to leave the spacedock now.
Moreover we don't have a Chief Engineer, and going on warp speed without one, might destroy the machines.

[SkummyB|BuF]

Mr Skums log stardate: 69

I have just recieved word that the Etarnaty will not be able to rescue me for another day at least, things are looking dire.

[CaSCaDe]

Captains log stardate 5473829.3:

in my absence my TO 8472 has been a promising replace captain.
but i must regret to inform him that the rank of commander.
(nr.1) is allready taken by Vortex.
he has been a great help on our previous ship and i have give him the privalage to be second in command.

now to moydoy, if u want u can have the rank of chief engineer. if u do not like this position please form a officail request for an other post.

as to the situation of skumboy, i have decided to send out a rescue mission whit our new prototype omegaflyer.
i have assigned my TO to take this mission on him.

[personal entry]
i hope that all goes well, i hate to loose good man especialy with this sjkaar treat coming up.
[end of personal entry]

i will have to ask all of my senior officers to get ready to leave the space dock in about 1 or 2 weeks.
theere is a lot of work to do and at the moment just 3 (and when my TO gets back maybe 4)to do it so do the best u can!.

CaSCaDe out.

[henke]

human cannonball's log stardate 45627.89:
My recent crew has been blown up and we were called nitros, but i found the pleasure being a crew of the USS Etarnaty. And i placed myself into one of the ships cannons waiting to be launched out and smash my head into an enemy vessel, so that i can inflitrate it and blow it up while i am still looking for an escape pod. (Usually i dont have enough time to find the escape pod so i blow my self up and somehow survive.)

Waiting for orders...

over and out...

[Gir]

<intercepted transmission>

"I am Bocutus of Lorg.
Lower your shields and surrender your ships. Your biological and technological distinctiveness will adapt serve us.
Resistance is-"
"Bocutus!"
..

"Ehr.., Seven of Nine?"
"You are not trying to assimilate those humans again are you?"
..
"Well I-"
"We just assimilated the entire race of the Bummulans. Aren't you the least bit tired?"
"A bit yes, but fatigue is irreleva-"
"I know, I know. But we haven't slept for like 9000 years. And besides, the bed is getting cold without you, honey."
"But what about the hu-"
"Come here darling.."
"But I.. I.."
"Resistance is futile!!"

<end transmission>

[Vortex]

Commander's log stardate 5473832.5:

I am delighted to have been offered the rank of commander on this fine ship. It couldn't have came at a better time, as I have spent the last few months on a large spacecraft occupied by five people, doomed forever to patrol an empty sector of space.

I am currently travelling towards Veredian III in my own personal shuttle (shaped like a flak cannon, natch) and should arrive within the next couple of hours.

Now, I wonder, what does the USS Etarnaty look like?

http://www.startrek.com/desktops/sketch1_640.jpg

OK, so it's the Enterprise E but I think this is the best Starfleet ship out there right now. Anyhow, it's up to the captain!

[Gir]

I don't know what ship that is, but it is definetly NOT the enterprise E..

And no I am NOT confusing it with the Enterprise D

[8-4-7-2]

TO's log. Stardate 58963,2

Captain Cascade came back from briefings with Central Command, and took place in the Captain's chair. I'm looking forward to the orders he brought from there.

With the new Omega Flyer I travelled to the Arkanis system trying to rescue Skumboy. Heavy ionic storms there made it difficult to scan, but after a few hours I found him on a godforsaken ball of rock. But his brandnew Danube class shuttle is only trash now. We flew back to Verdian III and Skumboy is recovering in sickbay. I hope the Captain is pleased with this mission.

Stardate 59002.2 Supplemental

There was a misunderstanding with Captain Cascade about my rank. From the moment I set a foot on the Eternaty I knew that Commander Vortex was 1st Officer. And I never attendet to take this position. Perhaps the Captain confused my rank (Lieutenant Commander) with my position (Tactical Officer)?

Stardate 591236.

I just heard that Commander Vortex is on the way. If MoyDoy becomes Chief Engineer we only need a Doctor and a Science Officer, and we would be ready for leaving to spacedock.

We also received a strange new weapon system called human cannonball a.k.a "henke". As TO I can't wait to see it in action

[gramps]

captain's log, stardate 12345.6:

our trip to Veredian III has not been a waste of time. upon arrival my keen eye immediatly fell upon a vessle called the 'USS Eternaty'. none of our crew has seen the ship before, and its current crew configuration is still unknown to us. however, we've made a fairly accurate scan of their weapon systems and suffice to say they are no match for us in battle.

i could issue an order to dismantle this unknown ship at any time, but i don't, much to the dismay of First Officer Roiker and Chief Of Security Mr Barf. they insist we should board 'Eternaty', eliminate all hostile activity with extreme prejudice and then loot it.

i feel however that we should try to communicate with this intriguing alien crew, and learn from them. it's always a fascinating experience to meet new civilizations. once we've learned all there is to know we can crush them still.

in the meantime, i eagerly await Dr. Slusher's special inspection in my private quarters. hmm...better save that for my personal log.

*** supplemental:

it appears the 'USS Eternaty' is not so harmless after all. they've incorporated a devious new technology into their tactical systems. it involves calculated electronics and a human cannonball called Henke. maybe a prolongued examination of the crew is not such a bad idea.

more later.
Dickard out.

[henke]

why learn from aliens?
havent you seen any alien movies they always end up destroying the earth or something, so before you want to learn from them show them who the boss is and wipe them out...all of them before it is too late.
:minigun:

[Vortex]

Commanders log, supplemental

I have recieved communication from the USS Etarnaty. An unknown vessel has appeared alongside the spacedock. At the moment, their intentions are unknown. I am now proceeding towards the Etarnaty's location as fast as my flak shuttle will go. This is a dangerous situation, as the Etarnaty weapons are not fully operational yet.

Commander out.

[8-4-7-2]

TO's log Stardate 52366.1

RED ALERT. Captain, report on bridge! Long range scanners have dedected an unknown alien vessel heading directly to our position. I made an emergency call to all other ships nearby, but I was only able to contact commander Vortex. His flak shell is still 1.125 lightyears away. First tactical projections show that the alien ship has better weapons. I knew that our lack of personel and equipment might one day be our biggest failure.If we only had more people: When Chief Engineer MoyDoy arrives, he could make our weapons and shields ready for combat.When all our systems operate a maximal efficency no ship in known space is a threat for us. But under this circumstances I don't see how we can survive...

[SkummyB|BuF]

Skumboy's log stardate: 666

I have been rescued by the crew of the etarnaty, and have made a full recovery, I am now waiting for assignments.

[gramps]

captain's log, stardate 12345.7:

i have sent a message to the USS Eternaty in which i ask the ship's captain CaSCaDe to attend a private dinner with me. alone, on my ship. i'm eagerly awaiting the captain's response, since Number One and Mr Barf have already begun the planning of what they call "Operation Wipe-Out".

i'll hold them back tho, or i'm not a Captain, but their fanatic scheeming and plotting has awakened something in me. i find myself acting more agreeable towards their plans, and i must admit it's been getting kind of boring over here. some action might be just what i need.

in the mean time i'm curious as to how Captn CaSCaDe will respond to my invitation.

Dickard out.

[henke]

Sir, send a message to ISVKran .........oh wait......that thing crashed right.....and isvkran wasnt a battleship either....
forget i said anything, sir

[CaSCaDe]

Captains log stardate 54327465.5:

as i have recieved the message from captain gramps i have decided to attant to his dinner.

i have a weird feeling about this but i think all will go well, atleasted i hope.

i responce to the arival of my commander i can not feel any thing else than joy.
our previus joirney has been very good and i hope this willl go that good to.

i am now on my waay to meet captain gramps.
i pray to god all goes well.
CaSCaDe out.

suplemental:

i have given Skumboy the rank of science officer.
god knows why bu i think he will do fine on that post.
if skum boy does not agree with this possition please form a official request for an other.

i addition i am please that we have layed our hand on this new experimental waepon: the human cannonball henke.
i have no idea what to expact of it but hell will try it.
if the dinner with captain gramps does not go as planne dwe might be forced to use it.
i informed captain gramps about this and i hope he and his crew take a notice of this.
CaSCaDe out

suplemental suplemental:

my TO thought i made a mistake. well, i did.
sorry for that but i hope it will not intrfere with our duties.

as beeen stated be fore we only need a doctor to take off.
if we have 1 my commander Vortex will need to take the elm till we find a apropiate replacement.
CaSCaDe out

[gramps]

captain's log, stardate 12345.8:

i'm delighted that captain CaSCaDe has given himself the honor of visiting me. i'm sure he'll be noticably impressed with our superior technology.

i'd like to expand more about this important meeting, but unfortunately i'm a bit stuck up with other duties at the moment.

i'll publish the results of our little conference on a somewhat later note.

for now, Dickard out.


*** supplemental:

captain CaSCaDe hasn't started things of entirely to my satisfaction. he insists on calling me 'gramps'. why is a mystery to me, as i do no yet show any sign of aging. ah well, we'll see how dinner turns out.

Dickard out.

[CaSCaDe]

MEMO

to Captain dickart
from Captain CaSCaDe
subject mis understanding

there has been a misunder standing,
i do not think u r a gramps but when i wrote that i must have been thinking of some 1 else.
sorry aboutt ha tand i hope that this will not harm our relations.

[personal note]
i hope that we will agree on a fusion of our ships. it would be a great oppertunaty to explore both our cultures.
[end of personal note]

[8-4-7-2]

CREATOR: You thought that the picture posted by Vortex isn't the Enterprise-E. Do have a problem with your eyes. That ship was no doubt Sovereign class (look at the deflector or the saucer-section).

As we only have a small crew I suggest that our ship could be Defiant class (I have no pic, but I'm sure you know it). This ship is only 120*97*35 meters big, but has the weapon power of the Galaxy class!

I thought our ship might need a motto. For example, the Defiant's motto is "All I ask is a tall ship and a star to steer her by" (Defiant-A: "Give me liberty or give me death"). The Enterprise's motto is "...where no man has gone before".
If anyone has a good idea, tell me!
__________________________________________________

Tactical Officer 8472 log. Stardate 84521.2

The dinner of Captain Cascade and the alien vessel's Captain (who is known as gramps) went better then I expected. We have an unofficial cease-fire and a armed conflict isn't probable now. I'm very glad with this situation, as we have more time to
get our ship ready.

After our newest recruits came on board I made a list of the crew:
Captain Cascade: Commanding Officer
Commander Vortex: 1st / Executive Officer
Lt.Cmd. 8472 (me): Tactical Officer
Lt.Cmd. Skumboy: Science Officer
Lt.Cmd. MoyDoy: Chief Engineer
Henke: "human cannonball" experimental weapon system

If s.o. of the crew wants to complain about his rank/position he should do it.

We still need a Doctor and perhaps a helmsman/pilot!
But I think that we will get people for this positions.

Computer: end log.

[Vortex]

Commanders log supplemental:

I have finally arrived at the USS Etarnaty. I am pleased to hear that our Captain has managed to negotiate a ceasefire for the time being. That should hold us out until our weapons systems are up and running. We may consider having our fine ship in the form of the USS Defiant. Still, we are always open to other suggestions. I am curous to know, however, how the engineers managed to build the Etarnaty without it actually looking like anything.

end log

[gramps]

captain's log, stardate 12345.9:

i think i've managed to fool the crew of the 'USS Eternaty'. how happy they were when i told them i wouldn't attack without reason. yes, excellent acting on my part.

had i any doubts before, my mind is clear now. god, how they kept on addressing me as 'gramps' when i had firmly told them my name was Dickard...as if it were a big joke! they will pay for their lack of courtesy.

now that 'Operation Wipe-Out' is approaching the final stage of planning we must take action quickly. also, our scanning sensors indicate that the Eternaty is rapidly building up their power source and weapon control. if we wait too long we won't be able to break through their defense system.

the time for diplomacy has passed. yes...we'll raid them soon.....very soon...{ends with insane bursts of laughter}

Dickard out.

[CaSCaDe]

Captains log stardate 547638954,6:

as i have thought the alien captain dickart has not been honest.
i have been forced to use our secret weapon : the human canon ball Henke.
i had no idea what the strength of this weapon was but i must now in form starfleet that this is the most powerfull weapon in the universe!.
when i gave the order to fire before captaain dickard could launch his attack to overpower us.
the devistation was hudge!
there is not 1 single shred left of the ship of captain dickard.
we have beemed the surivers aboard (including captain dickard) but as we donot have a doctor yet i was forced to energize the emh.
we have saved about 10 people from sudden death but i don't know what to do with them.
i ghope that they will be so senative to join us on our quest.
CaSCaDe out.

Suplemental:

as we now have al that we need to leave we set course for the tauron system to meet wiht the high ecautive of the tauron high counsel.
as i have heared he has a mission for us, i'm waiting.

CaSCaDe out.

[Vortex]

Commander's log supplemental

The captain have taken care of the offending ship as I was able to alert him over a secure channel of the potential destruction of our ship and are now on our way from the space dock. Although we do not have a complete crew some of the survivors from dickards ship may be willing to perform some of the more menial tasks. As I type we are on our way to the tauron sytem to recieve a mission.

I will leave this channel open for any other crew members to contribute as I must now leave to pass out in the corridor from sheer exhaustion,

[Vortex]

Commander's log supplemental

The captain have taken care of the offending ship as I was able to alert him over a secure channel of the potential destruction of our ship and are now on our way from the space dock. Although we do not have a complete crew some of the survivors from dickards ship may be willing to perform some of the more menial tasks. As I type we are on our way to the tauron sytem to recieve a mission.

I will leave this channel open for any other crew members to contribute as I must now leave to pass out in the corridor from sheer exhaustion.

[SkummyB|BuF]

Science officers log stardate: 31337

I have been assigned to science officer, and on my first day I noticed traces of a compound lining the ships engine room, i later found this compound to be Monkey Feces, I have informed the captain and am waiting for orders.

[henke]

human cannonball (henke) here..... i have managed to get myself together but i cant seem to find my right arm so i took some weapon derbis from the alien ship and made me a huge laser photon cannon for an right-arm.

but now to the thing...im still floating here in space and it could not hurt if someone came and picked me up...
i have lit a huge flare that could be seen from a humungos distance around the alien shipwreck....
so someone....please pick me up.

over and out.

[Vortex]

Commanders log stardate 685324.7

Using some sophisticated tracking techniques we have detected henke floating in amongst the debris of the recently destroyed Lorg ship. The captain has sent ot a salvage team to gather any remains of the Lorg craft and they will also pick up henke.

Memo to whoever:

We urgently need to enthusiastic crew members to carry heavy objects over long distances in the cargo holds.
PLease contact the captian if interested.

end log

[CaSCaDe]

Captains log stardate 574896345.6:

as i have recieved the message of the monkey feces in the engeneering section i have send my scienc officer to investigate.
i am looking forward to his report on this matter.

as for our experimental weapon sytem henke, we were able to salvage him and some debree from the lorg vessel, as i have thought we learned a great deal of there defensive and offensive strengths.

for the time being i am hoping for a save an fast journey to the taurton system to recieve our orders.
CaSCaDe out.

personal log:

i tyhink tyhat our rendevous whit tthe tauron high counsil willl no tbe as pleasant as some of us hope.
i have recieved word from starflet that with this new weapon we have discovered that we will be send to the war front against the skjaar home world. i hope these r just romeurs but if not this ship and his crew will have to prepare for a great sufaring in order to suceed in destroing the skjaaar 1c and for good.
CaSCaDe out.

[8-4-7-2]

Tactical Officer's log Stardate 58421.5

We were finally forced to use our weapon power to show Captain gramps who we are! "Human cannonball" henke was a excellent weapon. With one shot the alien vessel was vaporized. The only problem is the long loading time. We have to collect him from space after every mission. With I little training I'm sure we will improve the performance of henke. But for now: good job. As we don't have a doctor Starfleet engineers installed a EMH in sickbay. We will see how well it works. Now we are ready to leave and Captain Cascade set a course for the Tauron system, where he thinks we'll get a mission. Perhaps new crewmembers want to join us once we arrived there.

Lt. Cmd. Skumboy had some problems in engineering, but he solved them (I think). I havn't heard any word from our Chief Engineer MoyDoy and wonder if he we left him on Veridian III.

Computer: end log

[henke]

i got an idea for faster loadingtimes...
Just hook me up with a bungee rope or a big rubber band...
but beware that this could decrease my attack lenght, and it could hit back to our ship...

[8-4-7-2]

Henke: You must write your posts in log form ;)

I have already aked what our fine ship looks like, and if we need a motto. Perhaps someone could make a decision or further suggestions about this!
__________________________________________________

TO 8472's log supplemental

I received a suggestion from henke about his loading time. But I think using a bungee rope is imposible. The biggest disadvantage is that henke would return and severly damage our own ship. Furthermore the smaller attackradius isn't accaptable, as the phasers and torpedo launchers aren't fully operational yet. I will consider any other suggestions concerning this problem!

[henke]

i have noticed some head injuries that made me forget things like to add the stardate.

So ill be in the medlab if we have one else ill be lying someplace where i can get nitro...
over n` out.

[CaSCaDe]

Captains log stardate 564735684,4:

as i have heard the probleme about our new weapon to return to us or to have a faster reload time, i might have the idea to make this weapon even more usefull that it already is.

i will need to consult this with my senior officers to see if this will work.

the plan:
if we equip out weapon with a jetpack and repleace some body parts with cybernetic implants we might have what we need to make henke the best weapon in the universe.

jetpacks to return to the ship.
! these should be inpenatrable so the will not explode on inpact.
and cybernatic body parts to re-assamble himsewlf while he returns to the ship.

it also might be a good idea to try and duplicate this strange and alien technologie but there for we will need to ready a research bay and will our weapon not be avalible for several weeks, which is not a good idea whit the possibe offencive to the sjkaarhomeworld (this is clasified information so do not distrebute to ne outsiders)

for now we will have to wait wiht al of these thing cuse we barly have enought man power to keep this ship running, i hope that when we arive on the tuaron homeworld we will find some new crew members.
CaSCaDe out.

suplemental:

the survivers or the lorg ship have not been very cooperative whit us so i had to trow them in the brig.
untill captain dickard and his assosiates have agreed to help on this vessel whitout being a pain in the *butt* i will see if i let them out.

and even if i let them i will need a securaty officer to be there gardien and since we still not have a securaty officer i must leave them there.
CaSCaDe out

[MoyDoy]

I have finally arrived on Eternaty and have been assigned the job of chief engineer. Upon my arrival I noticed the ships obvious lack of Nililistic crystals. Although this is not a common kind of crystal it is most inperative for this kind of ship. A quick look at the starmap makes me believe that we should head for the planet Xuarta. There we can find some Nihilistic crystals. But the planet is inhabited by the alien race canadians. They are extremly agressive and like to go after people with a terrible weapon called the "hockey-stick". There is a risk that we have to fight a small war to get the crystals. I am waiting for the captians response.

[8-4-7-2]

Tactical Officer's log Stardate 58954221023.7

We are only 1.67 lightyears, or 2 hours away from the Tauron system. There, according to the Captain, we will get our first mission.
I studied Captain Cascade plans for henke and came to the conclusion that they are very promising. I leave to exact specifications and the realization to Chief Engineer MoyDoy and Lt. Cmd. Skumboy. I think they will perform well on this task, which is vital for the upcoming combats.

Lt. Cmd. MoyDoy informed of another problem. The Nililistic crystals in our warpcore are destablizing, and we forgot to supply us with enough craytals in Veridian III spacedocks.
But MoyDoy already searched for replacements and discovered resources on Xuarta. However this planet is said to be inhabited by a evil species called Canadians. We might need henke to beat them. Therefor we must have enhanced him when we arrive on Xuarta. But it first we have to accomplish a mission on Tauron!

personal log:

There are rumors on the ship that we will be sent to the front in the heating earth - skarjj conflict. I hope it's only a rumor. because a notice that the senior crew gets more and more nervous, icluding me

COMPUTER: Open all hail frequencies

This the USS Etarnaty. We still hire qualified and motivated personell.
See the galaxy, meet interesting people, and kill them

We search for a Doctor (no experience needed), security officers and a helmsman. If you are intersested contact us and we will take you!

[Vortex]

Commander's log stardate 5726916489712642817642839468164191306357621983657982365872611756238.8:

Unfortunately we have now run out of power in our Nihilistic crystals. Thankfully we have a backup system in the form of lot's of pikachus generating electricity. These creatures shall be dismembered once we have fresh crytals so we won't have to put with their constant "pikachuing" for much longer. This however makes me worry. This means that there may be a temporal anomoly somewhere on the ship that is allowing some pokemon to escape into our universe. This anomoly must be sealed as soon as possible.

Memo to oneself:

There may an error in this new stardate recording system. I suggest changing back to the previous method.

[CaSCaDe]

Captains log stardate 54352342,4:

i have recieved word from my chief enginere that we will not be able to go any further with out resuplying our nililistic cristals, as w e now run on pickachu power i forsee that this problem will be dealt with in no time.

my attention goes out to the space time anomaly reported by commander Vortex, i have no idea what to do about it.
i sugest to get away as fast as possible to not let those critters interfere with our vitale systems.
i am sure that this situation will be in good hands wwith commander Vortex.

i on the other hand have to think about the next course of action.
as i have recived word from starfleet with orders to set course for the sjkaar homeworld -that god forsaken place- to luanch the initial attack.
this would under any other sucomtances be no probleme but with my crew not entirly up and running i must proceed this matter with causion.
an other probleme to these orders are that our weapon system henke is not jet fully recovered from our encounter with the lorg, i wury that we might have to reject the orders for the sake of this ship.
i will need to discuse this with the my senior officers.

then there is the matter of the tuaron high cousil who will not be pleased if we don't show up.
i will need to try convice starfleet that the mission to sjkaaria is not a very good idea for the sake of the eternaty as well for the reputation of starfleet to the tuaron high counsil.

this is not an easy task.

CaSCaDe out.

[8-4-7-2]

With our last energy reserves and on pickachu power, we managed to reach Xuarta, where MoyDoy thinks we'll find Nililistic crystals. We are now in a standart orbit. Due to our lack of energy the ship operates in mode grey: All luxeries like holodecks, showers, and haeting are shut off. If it comes worst we must also shut off vital systems like light, artificial gravity or even life support.

If we have to fight against the Canadians, we may need henke. I'll request a report from engineering, how far his repairs are.

I suggest we sent a heavily armed away team to the surface at first, to see if we meet resistance. A full range attack from the orbit can is still a option then...

This is a critical situation, and the future of this ship and even mankind itself are determined by the decision we make in the next days.

[MoyDoy]

I am pleased that the captain has taken our lack of Nihilistic crystals sriously and that we have arrived at Xaurta.
The repairs on henke are running smoothly and he should be up and running soon. I will suggest that the captain will let me go on with the surface team as I have encountered the canadians a few times in my spam-pirate career. I believe that my knowledge of them will be most useful.

[henke]

i got an idea with the pikachus, if we could take all explosives and nuclear warheads off me and repace them with the pikachus. i coul proabably be used as an EMP. and only disabling the enemy to use anything electric, thus letting us easily board their ships and take all we need.
But we then might need some soldiers of some sort to take the enemy crew out.

But the pikachus are very well powered and the powa proabably needs to be researched before it can be used properly.

but imagine the possabilities, all the metal, energy, weapons, ships we can need.

over and out.

[CaSCaDe]

Catains log stardate 54543543,6:

the idea i recieved from henke to adapt the pickatupower to make him a emp weapon is very apealing, however i am not sertain tha that the entire crew will be pleased to have the little critters aboard, o well i will need to examine this possibilaty, good work henke.

as for te request of my chief enginere moydoy i most inform him he will be on the away team to recover the crystals.
as he has some experiance with these so called Canadians i think he will do fine.

i have given my science officer the order to research the possiblilaty that we might turn the monkey feces he found a few days ago in to a usable fuel in the case our crystal dry again.
he will need to study on this.

CaSCaDe out.

personal log:

again i have recieved word from starfleet to travel to sjkaaria and i tryed to explain our situation, they were unwilling to listen.
if they realy want us to go into battle in this condision and start a war with the tuarons at the same time i am afraid i will need to start a mutany against starfleet, lets hope it does not come come that far.

CaSCaDe out.

[8-4-7-2]

Our misery doesn't end. Longrange sensors detected transwarp lanes, most probably of Lorg ships! Maybe they search for Captain Dickard, who still sits in our prison.
On my advice the Eternaty is hidding over the magnetic poles of the planet. I hope this will make us invisible for Lorg sensors.

As we run out of energy and time, me and MoyDoy formed the away team. I would have taken Skumboy too, but is very busy to explore a new energy resource: monkey feces.

MoyDoy will be a creat help, because of his previous encounters with Canadians and his detailed knowledge of Nililistic crystals. We equiped ourselves with mark-5.8 phaser rifles, cartonium-handgrenades and bright, colourful protection suits (I hope this will distract and confuse the canadians).
When this log ends we are standing in the transporter room and say "energize"...

Supplemental:

I'm not pleased with the thought, that all this pikachus are running between my feet, Therefor I worked out a plan. Skumboy could develop a few stasis chambers were the pickachus are hold when not needed. If they are unconcious they can't harm or disturb us. The only problem is the energy we need for the stasis fields. Perhaps our new monky fece powerplant can provide enough energy for it...

Supplemenatl 2:

I noticed the time anomaly Commander Vortex, warned us about. I made a cup of coffee in my room and went to toilet. When I returned the cup was empty. Either it was a distortion in the time-space-continuum or somone drunk my coffee!

[Edited by 8-4-7-2 on 08-04-2000 at 12:11 PM]

[MoyDoy]

Almost imidiately after me and 8-4-7´s arrival on the surface we were attacked and knocked uncounsius by the canadians. We are now hostages and the canadians have toled me that we will not be released unless the Eternaty attacks and destroys the population of the nearby planet McDonald´s. The creatures on the planet are called americans and the canadians are at war with them. The americans are wastly greater in numbers but the technolgy they use does not beat the canadian or ours. I can only hope that the captain can make the right decision in this matter, as i know that the canadians are seious. We will most likely be killed if the americans are not dealt with.

[Vortex]

Commander's log stardate 5686362.9:

I have succeeded in seeking out the disturbance that was allowing the pikachus to escape into our universe. I will need to use some equipment from the science labs to close it. This will have to happen soon as more pokemon are escaping into the ship. Thankfully they are too idiotic to notice me so they can be killed with ease...at the moment.

Unfortunately, I have detected that the disturbance is putting great pressure on the ship's hull and we could easily have a hull breach on our hands if we do not act quickly.

Oh, I let that Jiggly|PuF| escape.

end log.

[8-4-7-2]

It can't get worse. Me and MoyDoy were overwhelmed by the canadians, when we began searching for chrystals. We are now held oin wodden cages somewhere in the endless forsts of Xuarta.The suddenly came out of nowhere and beat us with their hockeysticks. no we don't know what's going on with the Eternaty. I'm sure Captain Cascade is already planning a rescue mission. If he does I hope he prepares it better than we! If not he can try to attack Mac Donalds. But considering the Lorg traces I detected and our persisting lack of energy this is no pleasing option.
Oh no the canadians............they are coming again........ARGGGGGGGHH............NOOOOOOOOO.........

[CaSCaDe]

Captains log stardate 67475583,6:

i am in great distrase1
my to and ce have been taken hostoge by the evil canadians, the pokemon treat is still not delth with, there might be a lorg invasion and the starfleet/tuasron matter is still out there!
what should i do?????

i havent recieved word from my science officer to so i dont know if the monkey feces will be a new power source, if they arent we have a BIG problem!
we don't even have the power to keep up live support let alone try to take on the americans.

what should i do?

i wish my science officer and first officer where here to support me in this matter!
further logs might not be possible untill the power has returned!
CaSCaDe out

supplemental:

i only hope that my to and ce have layed there hands on 1 or 2 cristals cuse i am thinking of a despirate kamikaze attack on the canadians.
i should say rescue attemp cuse we dont have the power for a full scale attack.
i havce saved some power for an emergansy transport, and as far as we could see the canadians dont have transporter capabilaties yet, so they dont have the technology to block a transport to.
i just hope my officers have some cristals so we can whipe out those pescy canadian treath so we can get more cristals from the surface so that we can with stand the lorg invasion squad with oour henke(he has been ofline for a while now but with the new cristals he will be up and running in no time)
i adition with the canadian elimination we might travel to the near world of mc donalds to make friends with the canadians(and maybe a life time of free burgers)
if this plan works most of our problems will go over.
even the pokemon invasion(we need power to seal the rift)
The only problem then will be the starfleet/tuaron thing, but i'll see aboput that later.
first i need to get rit of the problemes at hand.

CaSCaDe out

[The Dopefish]

Annoyingly Persisting Holodeck Character log 64H! ;)

GAH! No one has gone on the Holodeck yet! Oh well, I'll just have to amuse myself with monkey porn, fish porn, Pokemon porn and various other types of porn until then. :D

[SkummyB|BuF]

I set up the stasis chamber for the pikachus, I felt sorry for the little beggers, so i let them loose for a while but they began to breed, i started recording the mating habbits, sadly this has resulted in me becoming known across the ship as "The Lord of Pikachu Porn". *sigh* I guess it is something I must live with. However it wasn't as bad as the fate which happened to creatoR, who was actually caught watching the footage ;)

[The Dopefish]

After learning that the ship's resident Pikachu curator has been called "Lord of Pikachu Porn," I've set out to make myself "Lord of the female Nidoran porn." Tests, although failures, have made me give up human porn. ;)

[Cap'n Beeb]

Personal Log 4:20

While hunting the evil canadians today I stumbled across some of these odd beings being held captive. Excited by this new find, and the chewy/yummy flesh of the canadians, I let loose with my anti-matter device which looks oddly like a 20th centry Glock 21 for some reason, and proceeded to munch on the rare cooked flesh of my evil enemies. Before leaving I noticed the two odd looking humans, which reminded me of my race, the Americans. Hmmm, perhaps I can lend my canadian-*** kicking talents to you peoples?

[Vortex]

commanders log supplemental:

I finally have some good news. The specialist equipment needed to shut down the portal has arrived and all I need to do now is wait for the power levels to be restored. I have even struck up a deal with some of the more co-operative Pokemon. They will donate some of their own feces (which they have told us have twice the power of monkey feces) in exchange for permission to use the empty quarters of the Etarnaty as broadcast centres for their "adult" Pokemon broadcasts. Skumboy and The Dopefish will be assisting in the productions of these broadcasts.

We may even be able to persuade them into retrieving our captured crewmembers from those damn canadians.

end log

[The Dopefish]

I decided that the whole female Nidoran lesbian thing just wasn't working, so I decided to check out some more Misty porn. :D

[MoyDoy]

An american on loose on Xaurta has killed the canadians that holds me and 8-4-7-2 captive. I am not sure what his intensions are but i hope he will be of use to us on this godforsaken world.

[8-4-7-2]

MoyDoy and me were rescued by a strange hunter, who introduced himself to us as beerbaron. He came no time too soon. I think the canadians just wanted to have lunch: us!
It was a pleasure to see how quickly and merciless the canadians were killed.

After our rescue beerbaron helped us too find some Nililistic crystals. With MoyDoys experience it was easy to exploit this resources. We loaded our bags with as much crystals we could carry: approximatly 160 pounds. Then we beamed back to the Eternaty and MoyDoy rushed to engineering like a burning weasel. He currently installs the crystals into the main power core. In one or two days most of our power problems will be over. First analyses of their structur and purity show that they can supply us with enregy for 1.3 years.
Concerning beerbaron: I think he will be an excllent security officer, but I if he doesn't like this rank, he can tell it.

Supplemental:

During our absence a holo character known as Dopefish appeared on holodeck 6. I still wonder how this was possible with the holodecks offline! Until now we weren't able to make a civilized conversation with him. He only spammed about porn.
As is only able to stay in section equiped with holo emitters (the holodecks and sickbay) he could act as Doctor. our current EMH can't hold a scalpel !

The Captain thinks the lorg subspace signals which are still on the sensors, are sign of a upcoming invasion.
I hope this is false. For all we know they may only search for Captain Dickard. He is still sitting in the brig on deck 26.

[MoyDoy]

Atlast I have made it back to the ship. Me and 8-4-7-2 is in life debt to beerbaron. I have installed the Nihilistic crystals and now we can finally get out of here. I am consurned that the problems we have met so far are only a taste of what is to come if Starfleet makes us go to Sjkaar.

[Cap'n Beeb]

Starlog 991:

After saving my american friends from the evil canadians, they posted me as a security guard on their cool ship. Sweet. But I swear, if I see one more of these bastardly "Pickachus" the halls are going to run with the blood of these obnoxious bastards.

To: Captain
Subject: Weapons.

What kind of weapons are available to me as the security guard?

[8-4-7-2]

It seems that beerbaron is confident with is rank, although it must still be confirmed by Captain Cascade. But perhaps he confused something. He's not only some security guard. He is now Chief Of Security.

[memo to beerbaron]

Well, as Tactical Officers I know all handheld weaons in our arsenal (It's not nessecary to burden the Captain with this).

Mark 5.2 phaser rifle: standard weapon
Antiprototon shock disruptor: vaporizes everything
Perliminium hunter seeker missile launcher
various types of explosives

Due to our fast levaing of the Veridian III spacedock, this are our only weapons up to now. But as security chief just tell us which wepaons might be useful and we'll order them!

[Vortex]

Commander's log 989820.8

As, I sit in the mess hall munching on some roast jigglypuf, I hear the good news that our crewmembers have been rescued from the surface of the canadian's planet, bringing with them a healthy supply of crystals (of which I have forgotten the name). With these power source, we no longer need the pokemon feces, so I locked the monsters in the airlock and send them floating out into space. Watching them die was extremely soothing. I suggest immeditate playback if stressed. However, I now must wait, as only our captain knows where we are headed next.

end log

[The Dopefish]

Note: the APHC has put put a sleep by Jigglypuff.

[Cap'n Beeb]

Starlog: 9823

Due to the lack of multiple firearms, I am volunteering my services as weapons producer. I also add my personal collection to our armory.

1. USRobotics Anti-Matter handgun (13 shot capacity)
2. Valve Atom-Disruptor (Use with caution)
3. Iomega Pulse Blaster w/ under barrel grenade launcher (NOTE: DO NOT USE WITHIN 50 FEET OF HULL, OR ELECTRONIC DEVICES)

As the thoughts occur to me, I will mention weapons to order. So far I have thought of only one.

Multibeam Targeting Phalanx: With a RPM of over 30,000 pe minute, this very cool weapon has been known to be able to shoot down ANY vehicle that is in range. Range: 3 million meters, but with a few alterations, I can increase the range to 6.34 million meters.

All weapons mentioned here will be added along with extra ammunition packages.

[The Dopefish]

APHC log 60B5H1735!

While no one was looking, The Dopefish threw some Pokemon into the weapons hangar. :D Handy bastards, they are.

[Cap'n Beeb]

Starkig: 98452

After cleaning up the Pickachus blood from the weapons hangars walls, I sought out to find the person who did this evil act. Since it was an evil act, I'm guessing it was some canadians.

Also, I have made a new weapon by taking apart a Mark 5.2 rifle. It now has a 60 charge capacity, RPM of around 300, and it now features a net launcher, flame thrower, and a proximity mine mode for those situations where its out of ammo, and you know someones coming.

Along with that, I have come into contact with a cloaking device, work shall begin on that ASAP.

[Cap'n Beeb]

Starkig: 98452

After cleaning up the Pickachus blood from the weapons hangars walls, I sought out to find the person who did this evil act. Since it was an evil act, I'm guessing it was some canadians.

(Note to self, why are these Pickachus so stupid! After storing some of my weapons into the hangar, I noticed each one proceed to stick its tail in a light socket, thus, exploding themselves!)

Also, I have made a new weapon by taking apart a Mark 5.2 rifle. It now has a 60 charge capacity, RPM of around 300, and it now features a net launcher, flame thrower, and a proximity mine mode for those situations where its out of ammo, and you know someones coming.

Along with that, I have come into contact with a cloaking device, work shall begin on that ASAP.

[MoyDoy]

I have presented a list of the personnel we need to the captain.

I need some assistants and i am positive Skumboy does too.
A cook. Those machines we have does not give us proper nutricians.
A fashion-designer so we can get out of these nasty pyjamases(sp?).
Cleaners so that beerbaron does not have to clean up Pikachu blood from the walls again.
Security guards.
A doctor. The Dopefish seems...fishy to me.

After our adventure on Xaurta I decided that we need to enhance our weapons quality so that it will not happen again. I found a Pickachu that I began experiments on. I have now managed to convert my phaser into a high electricity weapon which is far more powerful then the original phaser. I call it the Pika-Pha. I have requested all personnel to turn in there phasers so that I can convert does too.

[8-4-7-2]

As we are out of trouble now and all systems are operating in normal parameters, I had time to relax. I spent a few hours on the holodeck and enjoyed canadian and pokemon hunting.
But suddenly the Dopefish appeared and disturbed me. His spam made it impossible to proceed.
I heard that beerbaron had also problems with him. I think the Captain should talk to Dopefish about this.

We still need to seal this pokemon releasing breach. They can be seen all over the ship. With my pikachu enhanced phaser I managed to kill a lot of them, but for each pokemon I kill, two new ones seem to appear!

I agree with MoyDoy in that we desperatly need a cook. I replicated a pizza in the mess hall and it tasted aweful. The replicators have problems with cheesy food. Fixing this has top priority!
Concerning new crewmembers: I also need a personal assistant, preferable female.

[CaSCaDe]

Captains log stardate??????:

as i get a little ovewhelmed by the power of the booze i must attent to the urgent matters at hand.

first of all the personale problem.
i have no idea what to do about it! we could install holo-emiters thru out the ship to make some holografich personal.
the only problem -which brings us directly to the second probleme- is that the anoing persitanet holographic caracter whould be free to move around thru the ship, which is not an option!
aphc must be the most anoiing caracter around!
but o well he brings some life in the brewery!
i will need to think about his situation and the salution for it.
as for our new staf member beerbaron, welcome abourd, i have seen that u have done some hard work on this fine ship!
keep up the good work! that counts for al of u!

i have given commander vortex the order to do with the pokemon infestation as he pleases earlyer, as long as we can get rid of those pescy things!
for now good luck to all!
CaSCaDe out.

[Cap'n Beeb]

Starlog: 667023

I have continued work on the cloaking device, and it is working, sort of. The thing is, it emits a light bending sphere around the user, thus, making them invisible. But, if you shoot/throw anything at anyone, the sphere will break, and you will be seen. This doesn't go on forever, the sphere eventually "grows" for a lack of a better word, back.

I think I might have an idea on this "Kill 1 Pickachu, get 2 free!" thing. If you see one of them duplicate, shoot the second or "future" version. This might work also by killing the "past" version. My idea is something killed in the future has no past. Of course it could just be the nasty pizza talking to me.

[Vortex]

commanders log stardate ???

With the pokemon problem beginnning to get out of hand, I have decided to enter the disturbance that is bringing the pokemon to our world. As I expected, I am now in the pokemon world.

My guess is that there will some pokemon, more annoying and stupid that any previously encoutered, that is controlling this incursion into our space. Unfortunately on my way to the weapons store, I was assualted by a huge machine clearly designed for one purpose: to spam. I risked fatal injury as made my way through the walls of spam created by this machine and I was only able to grab a few weapons. I have a suspicion that this may have something to do with our holographic doctor, who's behaviour is becoming increasingly unstable.

Still, I must now concentrate on stopping the pokemon. I ahve warned security of the spam machine that is know roaming the ship. I just hope they can stop it, as it's powers of spam are most impressive.

end log.

[8-4-7-2]

I went on a search for the spam mashine Commander Vortex reported. After short time a noticed first signs on deck 9. All walls and floors were covered by spam. As I proceeded the spam got more dense. I was able to reach the machine and make a quick scan of it.
It's mainly a holographic projection, powered by pokemon feces. This proves Cmd. Vortex suspection that the Dopefish APHC is involved in it. The scan also revealed a threatening pact: The pokemons seem to use the spam as food, while providing energy in form of feces.

However I was forced to retreat to deck 7, because pokemons attacked me! We lost contact to deck 8 to 12. All remaining pokemons on the ship are gathering there.

I worked out a plan. We need to bring tachyon emitters very close to the machine, 10 meters at least. This should bring an end to all holographic activity there. Now to the problems:
The pokemons will defend the machine
It is hard to walk through spam
We don't have enough firearms as the wepon lockers are in the affected sections

I will ask beerbaron and the rest of the senior officers for advice.

Supplemental

In the last days I havn't received any word from our Science Officer Skumboy, nor has anyone seen him. I fear he maybe captured by the pokemons or injured in another way.


[Edited by 8-4-7-2 on 08-06-2000 at 01:18 PM]

[Cap'n Beeb]

Starlog: IHATEPOKEMON

I have completed my work on the cloaking device, and disabled the feature that turns itself off when you shoot something, so now it should be easier to destroy the pokemon.

About the spam/weapon locker situation, I am asking all personel to give me their weapons so I can make more and better ones. I modified the Iomega Pulse Blaster, now it can be used near hulls, so thats one problem down, and who knows how many to go.

On the subject of spam coated walls, I have discovered that the nasty pizza mentioned earlier has the power to neutralize the spams power, turning the spam into nothing, its like a take-home antimatter thing. I will distribute pizza to everyone on the ship, just smear it all over the spam coated areas, and it should clear up. Also, the pokemon are extremly allergic to beer. I recently discovered this with a battle of 3 Pikachus, and all I had was a bottle of beer with me. I chucked the bottle in the middle of the cluster of pokemon, and they imploded on themselves. Along with pizza, I will hand out bottles of beer to everyone.

Due to the recent devlopment with beer, I will start work on a beer-spewing gun, more on that later.

Finally, once the holograph guy appears, I suggest that we lock down all holographic projectors, and secure the floor in which the evil bringer of pokemon is coming from. That way, I think we can finally kill him.

[The Dopefish]

Someone secretly rigged me with a holo-emitter, allowing me free access to the ship. :D

On my travels, I decided to float up to the bridge. No one was there, so I decided to phuck around for a bit. The captain's chair is comfy. :)

Out of nowhere, a beeping noise is coming from the comm port. I press a button, and a voice said, "Pika pika pikachu. Pika pika pika pikachu. Pi-ka-chu pika pika!" Quickly I pressed the button for the universal translator (Ed. note: I almost put translocator there. :)), and the message was clear as anything I've ever heard:

"We are the Pokemon. You will be assimilated. Resistance is futile!"

[Cap'n Beeb]

UPDATE: The beer-spewer is now complete. This will make killing the pokemon much easier. I have now begun work on a pizza-dispenser, which should make the spam cleaning easier.

Due to the recent message from the Pokemon, I am advising everyone to arm themselves and prepare for the worse. If you need extra weapons/ammo, come see me. I have found a quick and effective way to make the standard phase rifle to fire two different beams at once. By creating a small slice in the main feeding tube, about right where the middle of the tube is, it splits the charge into an smaller, more powerful, two shot combo thing.

Also, report any suspicous activity to me.

[henke]

i have succeded with my research with the EMP and it works just fine with pika power. Unfortunately it is a bit too powerful. I tried to mout a few (23 to be exact) friendly picachus (that were hiding in my locker, watching porn) and they nicley climbed up to the EMP-device placed on my back.
and i put the EMP-charge to the lowest. And that should only stop my watch and other tech stuff 1 meter around me.
But as i said it is WAY too powerful and it accidently blew up the whole rear deck so the engines and other stuff that is placed there (like my room, and a few others) wont work until someone fixes it. I took a look arund i saw that at least that the rear decks 5-12 are totally powerless. And on top of all that the pickachus mounted on my back, mutated into some wierd humungous metal eating monsters and went haywire, so they are having a party eating everything up and they have me as a hostage and makes me eat stuff like bolts, walls, and so on.

So i need at least a few mechanics to fix this disaster and a few soldiers to wipe the mutants out.

And hurry up...there isnt much time left...

[8-4-7-2]

The moment I feared for nearly six years has finally arrived. The pokemon, our most lethal enemy, have begun an invasion of the federation and this time there may be no stopping them.

Our Spamfish has done his first useful thing on this ship, when he intercepted a pokemon transmission.
No we know their real intentions. I received word from Starfleet that they already attacked 4 planets. A federation tasksforce will intercept the pokemons at Wolf 359. I hope they can stop them.
I activated all weapon systems and shields of the Eternaty, but due to henke's fatal EMP experiment, they only run at 54 %

However, there are also good news. Equiped with beebaron excellent beer gun and replicated pizzas (who ever thought that they might by useful) I managed to clear the decks the decks 8 and 9 of spam and pokemons.

Perhaps the APAC makes his next good deed and stops his spammachine!

[Edited by 8-4-7-2 on 08-07-2000 at 05:20 AM]

[Vortex]

I have now located the pokemon command centre. Thankfully it was only gaurded my a pathetic magikarp which could only thash about in the water as I went about the process of disabling the portal generator.

I now have five minutes to return to the portal or I will be stuck in the pokemon world forever. I was assualted by a raichu on the journey back. I dodged it's attacks but it's electrical powers completely fried the circuits in my logbook thingy. I can't be bothered getting it replaced right now so I just tossed it away.

Here's a REALLY interesting twist for the story:
no more logs!

[Cap'n Beeb]

As I sit here hoping the Multibeam Target Phalanx gets here in time so we can intercept the pokemons, I thought of an idea to stop the evil monster/mutant thing from eating the walls.

Coat them with beer.

Since the mutant was based off a pokemon, and you know how pokemon are allergic to beer, if they can't eat the beer coated walls, they'll die.

I won't be available for a little while today as I am going to look for henke. Anyone who wishes to come along is more than welcome. Just remember to bring extra beer and pizza.

Weapon Update: I have modified one of the toasters in the cafeteria to spew harmful anti-pokemon radiation. This should be interesting. So far it has been. I pointed the device at a pikachu and hit the "toast" button. What I was rewarded with was a bubbly mass of pokegoo. Before I leave I will hand these out to everyone. Just point and "toast".

[The Dopefish]

On my daily travel through the ship, I decided to throw the UT weapons into the weapons hangar. I'll try to remind the crew that the goo gun makes Pokemon horny.

Thinking the mess hall wasn't all that I thought it sounded like, I decided to make a mess. :D The cook made me clean it up. :(

I also decided to catch all the friendly Pokemon (as it turns out, all the evil Pokemon went back to wherever they came from) and store them in the ship's computer. The computer had the chance to analyse them and made a record of them. 251 different Pokemon to be exact. I asked anyone that found any more of the friendly Pokemon to do the same.

Minutes later, someone caught me on accident. :) Make that 252 Pokemon, I guess. ;)

[Temporary Account]

Having recently made my plea to my captors, I have finally been released from the brig, where I resided with my ex-crew members. After informing captain Cascade that I served as Ensign under Cpt. Dickard, he told me that a similar position was also available on his ship, the Eternaty. I gladly accepted, as the brigs were getting quite smelly. It seems the latrine plumbing system has become clogged with Pokemon.

Due to the massive problems currently going on, my duties as Ensign have been temporarily postponed, and I've been assigned to clean up duty. While our Chief Security officer has devised an ingenious method of spam removal, it carries with it an unfortunate side effect. The corridors that were once covered with spam, are now covered with...PIZZA! Normally this would not be a problem..but unfortunately, it's replicated pizza, and it tastes like moldy cardboard.

I've sent a requisition memo to the Chief Science Officer requesting a Sub-Atomic Particle Destabilisation Vacuum, and a mop. As soon as this equipment becomes available, I'll begin my cleanup of deck 8.

I've also requested that Cpt. Cascade assign the remaining prisoners (except for Cpt. Dickard..I don't trust him) to be put on a work detail, under armed guard, in order to help me with the cleanup.

In the mean time, I'm helping our CSO test out what beer works best in fending off the PokeMutants that are infesting the rear quarter of the ship. It seems that they are highly alergic to very cheap beer, which is fortunate for me and Beerbaron..as we have no where to store the unusable beer, and must drink it ourselves.

Ensigns Log: Supplemental
I've also requested that Cpt. Cascade keep me in mind for future promotions. Perhaps as a Communications officer, as I've spent my spare time studying such technologies and languages as I've been able to. But I know he's a busy man with many heavy questions weighing on him. Perhaps when the current crisis' are over, he'll have time to give me a review.

Ensign TA, signing off

[Thar T'Pak [=AA=]]

Stardate 6969696969.69 Hunter-Seeker of the Third Triad Thar T'pak reporting.

I have managed to sneak into the ship via an airlock that someone blew a bunch of yellow rodent-like creatures out of. What kind of hunter would destroy such seemingly harmless being in such a way? Obviously someone without a clue on what a real hunter should do.

Upon replacing my space flight apparatus with my more traditional life support helmet, I switched on my personal cloaking device and walked into the ship.

Within 2 meters, I had to stop and scrape the spam and pizza from my feet with my wristblades.

Ahh throwing off his scent by liberally coating the walkways with other, less digestable food. This prey was quite crafty. It will make a good trophy on my ship.

I will continue to comb the corridors, observing the other prey in hopes of a worthy trophy. When I have collected my fill, I shall contact the armada to come a turn this ship into scrap.

Personal log:
Actually the pizza/spam combo is quite good. I find it has a certain untainted taste to it. I shall collect some for the return to the mothercraft.

[OshadowO]

OshadowO's Log Star Date Unknown:
My escape shuttle is almost out of fuel. I think I've lost the evil Darth Hitler's ships that were pursuing me. So what if I sliced up two or three of Darth Hitler's Pokemon? I was trying to see what makes the little buggers tick. I'm pikcing up signals that may be another ship. Hopefully it's not Darth Hitler's. If they're friendly I'll tell them I'm a Medicine Man. My 2 years of extensive training as a shaman and dissecting Pokemon should allow me to get by on BSing till I figure a way to get back to my ho's in the m0tits system. I hope to God it's friendlies. Preparing to transmit distress signal now.

OshadowO's Log Supplemental:
As long as this ship doesn't have a problem with spam and pizza combos I should be able to make it.

[The Dopefish]

APHC log...screw this.

Since I came online, I have heard tales of a "thread" of some sort, and how it was so big that it destroyed itself. I decided to search for this thread in the ship's old, defunct database. It wasn't long before I found the thread, and showed it to everyone for the second time. :)

[Cap'n Beeb]

WOOHOO!!! FREE BEER!!! Weapon testing should be much more fun now :)

About the pizza problem, I have an idea. First, gather some pokemon carcasses, staple them to the wall, then spray with beer. This works by having the pokemon DNA mix into the nasty pizza DNA (Does pizza have DNA) and neutralizes both into nothingness.

Also, I have spotted several occurences of a wavy distortion in the air. Either it is someone playing around with my cloaking device, or its something else. I have also noticed the wavy air likes the replicated pizza that is all over deck 8. It shows no hostile intentions, but I am advising everyone to stay alert, it could be some form of pokemon we haven't seen yet. If you need a cloaking device (I have made many more) just ask.

I still haven't found henke yet. I will continue my search ASAP. When we do get him back, someone ought to put a bell or something on him ;)

[Temporary Account]

Ensigns Log: Stardate 6942.77

I spoke with CSO Beerbaron, and he propsed a novel idea as to the clean up. Apperantly, mixing all three substances: dead pokemon, beer, and replicated pizza, will induce a reaction that turns all three into vapor. I'm requesting the enlistment of our engineering department to create for me a gunlike device that will accept a cartrige of beer cans and a top-loaded feeder of PokeCorpses. Central will be a mixing chamber that will turn it into a cleaning foam that can be sprayed on the walls. Once this machine is complete, clean-up should be a snap.


Personal Log
CSO Beerbaron mentioned a strange anomoly occuring in the vicinity of Deck 8. I too have noticed this, and I must say it gave me chills. I'm hoping that the captain approves my request for the prisoner work detail, as I fear spending any time down there alone.

Also, note to self: Try to drink less beer before you go on PokeCorpse gathering expiditions...

[OshadowO]

OshadowO's Log Star Date Unknown
OK this is getting annoying no contact has been made with this vessel yet. I think I may have to try and sneak in and risk it. If it is the dastardly Darth Hitler's men then I'm SOL. However this vessel looks very peculiar. It looks like a a big pancake with strips of bacon. I shall infiltrate the pancake/bacon ship and hope for the best unless contact is established.

[Temporary Account]

While familiarizing myself with the controls on the bridge, I recieved a faint signal on our short range sensors. Upon further investigation, it was revealed to be a small craft, heavily damaged as if from recent battle. I attempted to find the captain to notify him of this, but he was nowhere to be found. First Officer Vortex is on a mission to the "Pokemon Realm", and I'm unable to reach him.

Most of the other Senior Officers are also busy, either with ship repairs, PokeMutant eradication or engineering duties, so I have taken it upon myself to hail the ship. I recieved no response from the vessel, but scans indicate that most of it's vital systems have been damaged. I'm unsure as to how to proceed, as it may be crewed by hostiles which our harried crew is ill equipped to deal with at the moment.

I'm going to consult with Chief Security Officer Beerbaron, and see if he can form a security team. If so, we may open the rear shuttlebay doors and hope that the craft notices and understands our intentions. If it docs, a security detail will be on hand in case anything goes awry. And if they're friendly, well...I'll have Beerbaron bring some extra beer!

I hope I hear back from my superiors on this matter soon, as the crafts life support and power systems appear to be in a rapid state of decay.

[gramps]

prisoner's log, stardate 123456.14:

it's been roughly two weeks since my capture. i've had the leisure to do some serious thinking, sitting here in one of the Eternaty's oh so comfortable prisons. bah, a prison should be cold and dark and wet, not like this. the only thing that sets this prison apart from an ordinary room is that is has no replicator. this proves how weak and soft these people really are.

enough. there are more important matters now.

i've never been able to fully understand how i could have been captured so easily, and by a bunch of amateurs at that! it was almost as if they had some kind of inside information. they fired Cannonball Henke at just the right spot, where my ship is most sensitive.

day after day, prisoners come and go. but my crew seems to have just gone. every day another one is released and does not return. instead, my former crew is set to active duty on this cursed ship! how could they betray their captain like that?!

it makes me wonder though. i wouldn't be surprised if my "loyal and faithful" crew had something to do with my being captured in the first place. yes...now that i think about it, that Ensign....what was his name?...Ensign TA, that was it! i'll remember to pay him a visit when i break out of here. and i'll make sure he'll remember that!

the time is nearly come. i may look defeated, but i still have a final trump. there is one who is still loyal to me at least! i could be contacted any minute now. haha, the fools! when he's locked on to me, no force field is going to be able to stop me from getting out of here! hahahaaaaaaaa!!! {another burst of insane laughter}.

"prisoner" Dickard out.

[henke]

Code red!
i managed to get my hands on a terminal so that i can warn everyone that the picachu mutants have eaten a hole in the ship and the pressure is dropping rapidly. I have sealed an airlock so that the air wont run out...
but it is just for the time being, the mutants will proabably eat through the door too...we need firepower now...

[CaSCaDe]

Captainslog stardate ?$$#@!!?^^:

as i have thought the lorg vessels crew is a very good addition to our own, i also have seen that more and more people are wiling to join our crusade.
there have been a couple of problems the last 6 years but me and my crew have beaten tru it!

most of our pokemon trouble are over, but as i have rejected orders by starfleet i fear that they will sand a raid party to intercept us, we can only hope!

our aphc has proven very usefull as i have thought he would, whille all other crew thought of him as a anoining spamming f00, i always believed in him!
cataloging the critters! geniusly!
he informs me that he has spared 1 of them named jiggly[PuF]

we r setting course for tauron now t recieve some new missions.

as for the situation with the mutated pokemon, my chief securaty has taken good care of that problem.(the beer sucked neways, get some better to selabrate our victory on the pokemon)
the spam on the lower decks is being cleared by some strange wave in the air, we dont know what it is but it does a nice job, we should try to communicate with this wave.
also my cs has added a great amount of weapons to our arsenal, a little strange weapons but weapon non the less!

as i was saying the lorg crew is doing a fine job!
take our new ensine for example, hes has been very understanding about the situation and has understood the need to make decisions when all of the other crew is occupied.
the vessel he has detected has landed when we opened our hanger bays and the story of this man that came out is amazing!
(wtf, flying in a pancake/bacon ship a an prestation on its own!)
we now will need to watch our step for this darth hitler.
in adition to this story i have been informed that thos "shadow" as he calls himself has a skill in medicine!
finaly! with the spam and pokemon injured poeple on his ship we need a GOOD DOCTOR, our emh sux ***(littaraly, and nobody likes getting his *** sucked right?)

the situation with the sjkaaar war is still develooping, i am afraid that itis not the last we hear about this.

GOOD JOB ALL!

CaSCaDe out.

suplemental:

i have receaved underground information that captain dickard (gramps:)) has made escape plans i have doubled the shifts to guard him, and have put in the isolation chambers,
no bed, no toilet, no tv, no light, NO NOTHING!
and i have cut his rations to just bread and water!:)
THAT WILL TEACH HIM!
:D

CaSCaDe out.

[gramps]

== ultimate personal encryption code enabled. ==

<encrypt>
prisoner's log, stardate 123456.19:

yes! i knew my personal logs were being scanned. due to my latest log input, Captain CaSCaDe has transferred me to the isolation chamber with only water and bread to live on. hah, he couldn't have done me a greater pleasure! here, in the darkness, i can concentrate.

meanwhile i've been contacted by my secret ally and he's ready to get me out of here. nothing can stop me now. yes, i know they'll find this log entry sooner or later, but it'll take them a while to decode it. and i'll be long gone by then.

fools! i told you i'd escape! i'm gone, but not for good. i'll be back when you least expect it! you can count on that...vendetta!!!

Dickard out.
</encrypt>

[Vortex]

Phew! I finally made it back to the ship and it appears that many things have changed in my absence. There is a foul smelling substance lining the walls along with various pokemon corpses. Also, as I walked down the corridors, I was briefly assualted by an unknown persona. Judging by his appearence, I would say he is from a hunter race.

I now must conosult one of my fellow crewmembers to find out what has been happening in my absence.

[8-4-7-2]

I'm glad to announce that the pokemon thread is over once and for all. Using beer and pizza me and a few other crewmembers were able to clear all pokemon and spam coated decks. I have sealed the surviving pokemons in cargobay 4 and protected the door with a level 15 forcefield. I just wanted to kill them, when I dicovered another pokemon weapon. It seems that they develop hypnotic mind-controlling when threatend. I couldn't overcome to harm them.
However when I was trying to repair the replicator (I want pizza!) I discoveres a way to deal with this. A person who eats 2 days old replicated Gorgonzola chees is immune against the hypnosis! We only need to find a volunteer.
I can also report that Starfleet has stopped the pokemon invasion force at Wolf 359.
Commander Vortex returned from the pokemon dimension, where he sealed the breach. So we have one problem less!

We also received new crewmembers, like Ensign TA or Doctor Shadow, who already did great work here.
Now we only need a cook as I don't know how long I can eat replicated food.

Supplemental
I searched on all decks for our Science Officer Skumboy, but couldn't find him. I aked the other officers but noone has seen him. I wonder where he is, as the computer isn't able to find him either.

Supplemental
I explored multiple sightings of unknown being on decks 8 and 9. First analysis show that it is most probably a cloaked hirogen Hunter. The encounters with this species indicate that a peaceful solution isn't very probable. Finding him has top priority (AFTER repairing the replicators). I ordered that enginering re-configuers the internal sensors.

[henke]

im starting to get worried over here....im stuck in a corner with 2 huge mutants. That doesnt seem so friendly and they have noticed that some parts of me is metal (like my arm-photon-cannon that is disabled by the EMP experiment), and the mutants seem to get bigger by eating metal. they have tripled their size since they mutated....

Im looking around and i see that im located on deck 7 (even though the lights dont work)

so could someone pleas send some troops up here before it is too late?

over n' out

[Cap'n Beeb]

AHH!! A breach in the hull! DAMMIT!! Good thing it was secured though. Anyway, I have noticed Mr. Wavy Air many more times than before. It still hasn't "attacked" me in anywy I can tell, but I am still cautious, and I advise everyone else to be too.

Also about the hull, I have made a foam like substance that works as a sealant and adhesive. Using old beer cans, a cardboard box, and left over pizza crust, the mix bubbles into this foam which makes an airtight seal around anything. It is also unbreakable to every weapon I have tried. Maybe we could use this to capture the 2 monster things that have captured henke.

About henke. Due to his last report, I am on my way to deck 7 and see if I can locate, and bring him out of there.

Also, I have made more weapons in case we need to have a little "chat" with the wavy air guy. The weapons are as follows. (Note: Some are from my personal collection of ancient 20th centry handguns and rifles, but they still work, sometimes better than what we have now.)

1. Glock 21 .45
2. M16A2*/M203 40mm Grenade Launcher
3. Desert Eagle .50 AE (MASSIVE RECOIL!)
4. Robar .50 BMG Sniper Rifle (I warn everyone NOT TO USE THIS WITHIN 100 YARDS OF THE HULL! Save it for when and if we land)
5. HK MP5/A3 10mm
6. HK MP5/A3*
7. HK MP5/A3*
8. HK MP5/A3*

*= These have attached Beta C mags which hold 100 rounds.

Also, I have sent some beer to the guy who recently arrived in our rear bay thing (I forget what it is) Enjoy :)

[Thar T'Pak [=AA=]]

Hunter-Seeker of the Third Triad Thar T'pak reporting.

I have managed to wander the corridors largely unoticed. The small yellow rodent population aboard the ship has seem to subside, although the intoxicating aroma or shplam and peezza still coats many walls and ceilings. I am finding it hard to concentrate on the job at hand.

I followed two heavily armed prey down to a small room. They seem to be escorting another prey into a small room. After they appears to lock the smaller prey, I easily dispatched them both. After ripping out their skulls and spinal columns, I peered in on the strange prey that they seem so scared of. Chuckle. Appears to be an old prey, hardly worth a fight. After re-initializing my cloak field, I casually unlocked the small prey's cell and bolted down the corridor to a lift tube.

I headed up to their bridge, scraping come peezza and schplam from the wall. I had a light snack while looking over the various controls on the ship.

OOPPS. Damn I spilled some food on a control marked "Navigation". Nothing a little cleaning with my wristblades won't cure.

Damn. Their equipment is so fragile. I just put my blades through those controls. Well, they'll know I am here soon, so I ran back to the lift tube and headed down to some area called "Engineering"

[Cap'n Beeb]

On my regular "wonder whats down this way" tour of the ship, I found henke!!! He has eaten quite abit of metal and it looks like something tried to make a snack out of him, but I think he will be alright.

UPDATE: I have used my sealent foam and secured the Engineering room where the wavy guy was last seen. Thats the only way in or out of there as far as I know. I found something that can break the foam, incase it finds another way out, or someone is in there. I used the heating coils and the anti-pokemon toaster, the things are probably the sharpest tools I have seen in a while.

I am advising everyone to stay away from the engineering room until we have found out the intentions of the wavy guy. Maybe its friendly, maybe its not, I just don't know right now.

I have noticed that we seem to be moving in a circle. Later today, I'll go up to navigation and see wtf is happening.

[8-4-7-2]

I made some progress in hunting this wavy air guy. From pieces of pizza a found on the bridge, I concluded that he was there, as there were previous reports that he likes pizza. He seems to have a strong stomach. I placed some holographic crewmen throughout the ship, hoping that wavy air gets the bait. And I was not disappointed. Soon after this two slaughtered holographic corpses were found on deck 8.
Now I'm sure that he is a Hirogen hunter.I can't believe he thought they were real. The intelligence reports about their dumbness were true.

From all known facts I made a plan to catch him.
I placed pizza traces starting at engineering (the wavy air effect was last reported from there) and leading to cargobay 5.
There I will trap him in forcefield. By all his stupidity this will be very easy.

Supplemental
We still need a volunteer who eats the replicated Gorgonzola and then kills the remaining pokemons!
Perhaps Ensign TA. If he does I will se what I can do for his promotion. Doctor Shadow is waiting in sickbay, if there are complications....

[MoyDoy]

I met one of those terrible beings, hunters. He came in to engineering and attacked me. I managed to defend myself but that was only because of my experience of theses creatures in my spam-pirate days.
We have a new doctor onboard. His name is Shadow and I know him from before. He and I were part of the crew of Pylaus, one of the greatest spam-pirate ships in known space. Unfortuanetly he was plotting back then a muteny and I found out. I reported to the captain, the legendary Rooster, andhe was arrested. But he managed to escape and I can not to this day understand how. I fear that if he finds out that I am part of the crew here he will take revenge. I better be on my watch.

[Thar T'Pak [=AA=]]

Hunter-Seeker of the Third Triad Thar T'pak reporting.

Upon making it down to engineering, I saw that some very bright prey have made it there ahead of me. Now I am questioning who is the predator and the prey here.

Hmm, I see someone has been dropping peezza on the floor. The fool. As I scoop up a piece I see another one farther down the cooridor. Ahh the rest of the Armada will like these.

Wait. I stopped short of a room called cargo bay 5. Something smells, fishy here. I grabbed a few of the yellow rodents as I came this direction and threw then into the room.

AHA, a forcefield trap. My these Beings make worthy prey. I guess that way is blocked. So I ducked into what looks like a feeding room. Noone is about, so I'll switch off my cloak, unbuckle these damn tight weapon belts and sit down.

Now for some Peezza and schplam.


Hmmm Yummy

[The Dopefish]

Even with the Pokemon gone, I still hold little Pokemon matches on the holodeck. I'm reenacting, in my own, special way, the travels of that Ash kid, only I kicked his *** out of the story and made Misty 18. :D

[Sam_The_Man]

New recruit Sam's log, stardate whatever it is today.

I have just joined the USS Eternaty. I hope to be a valuable asset to the crew by doing 3 things:

a) Getting the ship renamed "Eternity" because that is how it is spelt

b) Exposing Dopefish's activities on the holodeck, which shall show him to a) have watched Pokemon and b) fantasized about one of the characters. Mwahahaha.

c) I also hope to persuade the captain to replace our outdated and obsolete energy weapons armory with axes that you can swing around your head and scream "RRRRRAAAAAAARRRRRRRGGGGGHHHHH!!!!!" with.

As well as this, I would like to know the correct way to sign off a log.

[The Dopefish]

I have started a petition to get Sam The Man thrown in the brig. :D

[Cap'n Beeb]

Uh, we might be fecked here people. I went up to the navigation deck to see why we were moving in circles, and making a nice little descent to some planet I have yet to identify, when I noticed that there was a couple of slash marks in the main navigation computer's circuitry!! We need an engineer up here immediatley!!

Along with the slash marks, there were lots of traces of spam and pizza. Since I have yet to see any bladed weapons here onboard, I am only assuming it was done by the wavy air guy. If you see it, proceed with extreme caution.

I have made some infrared and night vision googles so we can see in the darkened sectors of the ship. If you need them, don't hesitate to ask.

[Thar T'Pak [=AA=]]

Hunter-Seeker of the Third *belch* Triad Thar T'pak reporting.

Well, somehow I cannot fit in my cloak field, When turned on, it can no longer hide my enormous gut. I have proceeded to clean the *belch* Feeding area and the surrounding halls of this wonderful thing they call peezza.

Now, I just need someplace to wash it down, some good reading material, and a place to deposit my waste.

Hmm this room is marked "Holo-suite", I wonder what....



*YYEEAAARRRGGGHHHH*


Someone tear out my eyes!!!!. I saw something disgusting going on with a yellow rodent and a red-haired little girl. Ohh by frak, I think....I THINK!!!


*BAAARRFFF*


Eww. Well at least my gut shrank. Time to stalk some more.

Hunter-Seeker of the Third Triad Thar T'pak out.

[OshadowO]

Medical Officer's Log :
Star Date: 132446454564864
I was fortunate to be rescued by this ships good captain Cascade. I felt I didn't have strength left to make the break in plan work. At once I was assigned to be the ships Medical Officer- they must be desperate they didn't even ask for a resume'.
No sooner did I sign on I was shown to the sick bay where one of the crew Henke was awaiting aid. One look at him and I said "I'm a doctor damn it not a blacksmith." Still I prescribed two doses of WD40 twice a day and told him to switch to 90 octane instead of 89. He seemed like a fine young lad.
Something very exciting was bought to my attention lately. I overheard TO 8-4-7-2 word his concerns of a Hirogen hunter
on board. I have come across this species in my days with Captain Rooster and almost got the chance to dissect on of them before the compassionate dolt let him free. I mean he was a Hirogen hunter. Yet I remember the means by which we captured him. With the help of a Pokemon PizzaRaRa whose super Pizza attack subdues the hunter temporarily using strands of mozerella and renders their cloaking field useless. However I shall have to breed PizzaRaRa back as they are an extinct species. I'm certain with a few genetic alterations in some of the surviving Pokemon on this ship and inter-bredding I can do this. Besides I hear some people on this ship are into PokePorn, it should serve to entrtain the crew as well, Not to mention PizzaRaRa's second ability was culinary arts and damn this ship needs a cook.

[Temporary Account]

I don't feel so well. As I had mostly cleaned up the levels of the ship that were coated in pizza, I foolishly volunteered for the removal of the remaining Pokemon in Cargo Bay 4. Little did I know what this would involve. Let's just say that if I come into contact with Gorgonzola cheese again, I'll be a happy man.

Fortunatly, it had it's effect (other than the earth shattering heading and bowel shaking nausea), and I was able to successfuly resist the hypnotic lure of the Pokemon. In thinking about it, I think just about anything that made me violently ill enough to be a distraction would have worked. I managed to work the controls, although mostly on reflex, and atomized the sickeningly cute creatures. Hopefully this is the LAST we'll see of them, as I don't think we could handle any more of their mischief, especially with the dangerous mission now ahead of us.

I'm going to head to sickbay now and see if our new doctor can give me anything to help me sleep. I think I'll just rest a little while. Hopefully I'll feel better soon, then I'll find my superiors and see what duties are available for me to carry out. Maybe I'll confer with the Science and Engineering officers about the communications and sensor capabilities of our fine shi....oh god...<noise ommited>. Uhhhh...that's a little better..I wonder if the doc makes Cabin Calls...

<End of Log>

[OshadowO]

Medical Officer's Log
Star Date 254697874
I have noticed something very interesting. The star dates have no logical sequence. I also had to make my first house call.
Ensign Temporary Account had extreme PokePizza Poisoning. A rare disease yes. I look forward to dissecting him if he doesn't make it. Still I have to follow my hypothetical hypocritical oath and try and save his life. He wanted to be put to sleep. At first my eyes lit up "Yes dissection after all!" I thought but then I understood he only meant temporarily. So I gave him some sleep inducing pills that I smuggled of Darth Hitler's ships. He used to use those to put his Pokemon to sleep when they were too irratible. Since the ensign is much larger then your average Pokemon I gave him an extra dose. To be certain I also gave him some anit pizza poison tooth paste and told him to brush 50 times a day for two days. THat should give him immunity to this type of disease for the next 12.45698 decades by my calculations. Yes I think I like this job
Medical Officer's Log Supplemental
My genetic experiments with the Pokemon to try and breed PizzaRaRa have progresses well. I have concieved a baby RaRa and a mother Za is pregnant with hopefully a Pizza. If all goes well I shall have Pizza and RaRa ready to breed within 18 standard hours thanks to some growth accelerating technology. Which reminds me I need to find a way to get my hands on some decent medicines for humans. The Pokemon stuff does not quiet cut it. I hope the poor ensign is ok. Those sleep pills can cause intense diarrhea. I hope he remembers to brush tho because that should cure him of it as long as he brushes the first 10 times. Maybe I should have mentioned that. Too late now.

[Vortex]

commander's log ???

Hmm. I am finding it hard to concentrate on this log as I can some noise coming from just down the corridor. It sounds like a dog but I don't dare investigate it incase it is another pokemon. I have noticed that we are drifting dangerously close to a nearby planetoid and could enter it's gravitational field soon. I hope our captain knows about this. It appears also that our new member Sam_The_Man wants to change the name of the ship to the USS Eternity. If he wants to then I won't stop him going for a walk outside the ship to repaint the name. To take my mind of the current situation(s) I am now going to engage in some elaborate pokemon related activities in the holodeck. But not before I've put an end to that infuriating creature's barking. Even if it's not a pokemon, I'll still slit it's throat.

End log

[8-4-7-2]

I'm glad that Ensign Temporary Account volunteered in killing the remaining Pokemons. I appreciate that he risked his own life to save ours. The replicated Gorgonzola worked as I predicted but the sideeffects were stronger than I thought (sorry Ensign). However Doctor OShadow did a great job in healing him, as he did with henke before. The pokemon threat is now over, but I heard that our Doctor began secret experiments the breed new ones. But if it helps the catch Mr. wavy air that's good.

To reward Temporary Account's selfless action I will recommend him to the Captain for a promotion to Lieutenant Junior Grade.

Our new recruit Sam_The_Man, altough he suggested some stupid things, also needs a new position.
He could choose between Communication Officer, helmsman, cook (I want real pizza) or personal assistant to the Tactical Officer ;) The same positions are open the Ensign TA.

Supplemental
Due to the last crises' I noticed increasing stress among the crew. Perhaps we could meke a detour to Casperia Prime. This is the new recreation and fun planet in the Rigel system.
There we can get real pizza, real women(I'm tired of holodeck sex.....computer delete the last sentence) and a lot of fun.
But as I heared that the ship is in threatening near of an asteroid, my suggestion will surly be dismissed :(

[Edited by 8-4-7-2 on 08-09-2000 at 08:43 AM]

[Vortex]

commanders log supplemental

Just a quick note to say that I agree that the captain should detour to Casperia Prime as 8-4-7-2 suggested. There was a severe power drain in the holodecks recently and the computer was only able to generate 2-dimensional beings. Damn. It also appears that some unusual text appeared at the end of my previous log. If anyone is skilled in alen languages could you please have a look at this.

end log

[RizMan|PuF]

Ensign RizMan's Log, USSArabella, stardate 52789.2

Today, we met with an unknown species. Scanners showed, that their weapon strength was superior to ours. Captain tried to hail them, but without any result. After a few moments of silence, the TO reported that the unknown ship was activating his weapons. The captain ordered to put all resources into shields, but unfortunately, it did not help. After one hit, shields were down, deflector and warp were out of order. Then, everything happened very fast. I don't know how often they hit us, but our ship's hull was about to break. Most of the crew members were already dead, due to the explosions. I tried to help them, but it was to late. May they rest in peace.
We had hull leaks on almost all of the decks of our ship. I managed to get to the shuttle ramp. I waited until the last moment, but nobody else showed up, so I had to start engines and take off before the ship exploded

The shuttles engines were damaged due to the explosions shockwave, so I'm drifting now in outer space. Scanners don't work, so I can't tell if any StarFleet ship is in this sector. I started a rescue beacon. Hopefully someone's gonna find it and come for me. I've got only 2, perhaps 3 days to live without food nor water.
I will try to make more log inputs, but I don't know if I gonna stay awake. I'm badly wounded, lost a lot of blood. I managed to stop the bleeding, but my medical skills are not good enough to heel everything.
I got to stop now. I feel that I won't do it very long anymore.
If anyone find this, please tell my girlfriend that I love her...forever...

End of log





[Edited by RizMan|PuF on 08-09-2000 at 09:30 AM]

[Vortex]

[Vortex]

Whoops I didn't read that log bit in your post. Sorry! Anyhow back to the story.

While I was sitting at the communications desk, I picked up an extremely faint starfleet class distress signal. It is coming from a class 3 escape shuttle that appears to have drifted far off our established transport routes. we must retirve this vessel as soon as we can as the shuttles occupant has stated that he has no food/water supplies. I have notified engineering and they working as hard as they can to get our ship out of the pull of this asteroid.

[RizMan|PuF]

Personal log, stardate 5978.5

I slept for a few hours now, but I don't feel better. Pain is getting worse every minute. I really don't know how long I'm gonna make it in this shuttle w/o any supplies.
I'm wondering if any other crewmember of the Arabella made it out of the ship before it exploded. I lost a lot of good friends onboard of this ship. Damnit, if only I could have done something to save the USSArabella from these aliens. I feel guilty for it's destruction, but there wasn't anything we I could have done.
I feel weaker with every word I'm saying, so I'm gonna stop here and pray that someone finds this rescue beacon.


End Log

[8-4-7-2]

Vortex and RizMan: Perhaps you could delete this two posts.
For me, I must say that I didn't think, that RiMan meant the Eternaty!
___________________________________________________

Tactical Officer's log Stardate 4563636.5

As I could reach noone in engineering (What are they doing down there) I remembered an old wisdom: "If you want something done right, make it yourself".
So I transfered auxililary (sp?) energy to the warp drive and emitted a warp shock wave through our main deflector. This provided us with enough thrust to overcome the gravitational field.

New scans show that the Starfleet distress signal is in direct route between our position and Casperia Prime. This comes very handy as I already have Commander Vortex on my side!

We are now heading with warp 3 to Ensign RizMan's last known position. I only hope we arrive in time. I will call Doctor OShadowO in sickbay to stand by for emergency revival.

[Thar T'Pak [=AA=]]

Hunter-Seeker of the Third Triad Thar T'pak reporting.

These beings are amusing to no end. It seems that they have no direction and seem intent on saving every wounded being from here to the galactic core. I have managed to sneak into the command area again.

Hmm, noone appears to be about or noticing the lift's door opening and closing.

I see they attempted to fix that damn console called "Navigation". Hmm interesting. Here is one called "Life support" and another called "Weapon systems".


heh

I quickly and carefully peels the name plates off and replaced "Life Support" with "Weapon systems" and vice versa.

Should be interesting to see the results. I, also found the captains quarters. I will hide in here for a while until I get more commands from the armada. In the mean time, I can snack on some peezza-schplam.

Hunter-Seeker of the Third Triad Thar T'pak out.

[Temporary Account]

I recieved a visit from Doctor OshadowO. He gave some sleeping pills and toothpaste. I'm not sure, but I think the good Doctor may be partaking a little too much of his own medication. He gave me a ludicrous prescription to brush 50 times a day! I'm sure he must have been mistaken...maybe he meant 5. That sounds more reasonable. While the sleep was very peaceful, and the headache and nausea seem to be gone, I know have an attrocious case of diarreah. I suppose it's to be expected though, after eating all that cheese.

I've been commended by Lt. Cmd. 8-4-7-2 for my efforts, and he's recommended me for a promotion! He also informed me that there is an opening for Communications Officer, which I'm very happy about. I hope the Captain is amenable to his suggestions. I'm hoping to feel better by tomorrow and get back to my duties. Especially if we are going to the pleasure planet, as some rumors have stated. I feel the whole crew would benifit from a break. I'm glad my superiors see this also. Oh boy...bathroom break...

<End of Log>

[Vortex]

I fear that the lifeform I was attacked may still be onboard. I was taking my pet Gengar for a walk when it pointed out to me that the labels for life support and weapons systems had been switched around. A nice attempt at sabotage, I guess, but considering that both consoles have different layouts and there is no such weapon system as "artificial gravity", it is also rather laughable. It is not long before this intruder does some serious damage however, so it would nice to find it as soon as possible. We are now six hours away fom the location of the escape shuttle. We just hope that the occupant is able to hold uot for that long.

[MoyDoy]

I have been unable to chat with most of my crewmates because of all the work I have performed. The pokemons made quíte a mess down here in engeenering and I had to go up on the bridge to fix some of the controls that the wavy air guy smashed. All is well now and I have heard that we are getting a wounded member of that lost ship that the pokemons blew up. I still fear the doctors intensions on this ship and I have heard that he's methods are a bit...unconventionale.

[8-4-7-2]

I detected an anomaly in our life support system, causing a dangerous low level of oxygen on the bridge. So I went to the controle station and pressed a few buttons, when suddenly a huge explosion rocked the ship. I soon found out that I've accidently activated our new multi target phaser phalanx.
(Someone switched the stations' labels and due to the lack of oxygen I lost orientation).

The scans showed that we had a lucky shot and destroyed a cloaked Hirogen vessel.Further examinations showed Hirogen fingerprints on both stations. HAHAH... nice attempt, but it went into the wrong direction! Perhaps we have even destroyed Mr. wavy air's personell shuttle.

As everyone knows Hirogen ships have a Monotanium hull armor. I suggest we quickly salvage the debris. We could for example enhance henke. And who knows what else we can do with it?

[Cap'n Beeb]

Starlog: 363

Due to the recent events of the switching name plates for critical components in engineering, I am almost certain of two things.

1. Someone is trying to sabatage us (not a very good job though)

2. Its probably the wavy air guys doings.

So therefore, I am advising everyone to try to eliminate the wavy air thing before it can do any serious damage.

Oh, someone threw a whole bunch of those annoying 20th centry AOL discs into the weapons locker. Even though this could be bad, they serve as a weapon I call "death frisbies." They fly really good, have excellent range and stability, and are razor sharp. I have tons of these things, if anyone wants some, take a whole bunch, I don't care. Just get them out of here!

Also, I have gotten ahold of a spare replicator, and I will begin work on it as soon as I can so we can get some edible pizza here!

[OshadowO]

Medical Officer's Log
Star Date 9865354321 and then some more

My experiments with the Pokemon breeding have gone horribly wrong. A mutant Pizza came out and it devoured my RaRa instead of mating with it. I was planning on dissecting it when I heard the Mutant Pizza trying to say in it's squeaky voice, "Kill, Kill Hirogen Hunter...Kill Hirogen Hunter." Since I had no further use for the mutant Pizza I let it loose in the hopes it would do some damage to the hunter who has no means of escape now. In the meanwhile I will continue to try and breed a Pizza and RaRa in hopes of getting PizzaRaRa...damn I need some decent Pizza.
Supplemental
They placed me on alert, it appears we are on a rescue mission to save some schmuck from somewhere. I still need to find some decent medicine in this ship, the Poke Medicine just does not work well on humans. I hope the ensign is Ok. I will leave him a message to brush, I like the guy.
Suplemental's Suplemental
GASP! I think I have seen MoyDoy in engineering. My old enemy. Could it be that he survived the hydrogen-chlorinate-carbohydrate protien plague invasion that infested Captain Rooster's ship while he was patrolling the feeble-warble system?? This is not good I must watch my step. I cannot do anything o dissect him...err move against him but I will bide my time. Now I must go to deck 16 II for I was told that there may be some real medication there.