Things that make no sense in porn

[Azura]

I've been meaning to make a thread like this for a while because there are things in commercial porn that just make me want to say "huh?".

Here's a first example: girl and guy get down to serious business and girl goes on to make some very suggestive moves such as ... licking her own knee. Wtf ?

[drakon]

Links? ;)

[Azura]

Use your powers of imagination Luke ;) .

[B]

What's wrong with licking your own knee?!

[Azura]

I don't know. As a guy are you particularly turned on by seeing a girl licking her knee ? Is the knee recognized as an erogenous zone ?

[B]

No it's not really my thing, I'm an ass man :) but I'm sure there are people that are turned on by kneelickers, it's probably one of the less crazy things..

[Azura]

Well I guess I'd be interested in a kinky scene involving the girl in your signature (name ?). But for the laday to do something like that while getting pounded somehow conveys a certain disinterest for the act. Either that or it's a weak attempt at being "artistic" or original.

[B]

yep, point proven... :D

[Adelheid]

I have a DvD that is censored about half way through, the form of censorship the UK cencor used is to cut the sound and fill the screen with a big black square bearing the legend "PRESS SKIP NOW". Kind of ruins the moment.

Anyway, one day I discovered that if I press fast forward rather than search the square would not appear and I could see what was happening.

Guy and girl, going at it, with their fingers jammed down each others throats.

O_o

[_Zd_Phoenix_]

URRRGH!

'Let me wave my stump in your face' would already be an uninspiring line, but that pic is just horrid :eek:

[Kou]

Ummm... yeah, you might want to reconsider that picture.

[Azura]

Such as this?

Hmm... definitely wtf material with that toilet lid there :D.

[GotBeer?]

Poop. <--That is what does not make sense in porn.

This being BuF, I'm sure I will now be flamed. Or hot carled.

[Kou]

Poop. <--That is what does not make sense in porn.

This being BuF, I'm sure I will now be flamed. Or hot carled.

+1. I've got your back. Then again, I hate pornography itself, so... Whatever.

[GotBeer?]

^eunuch

[Azura]

Yes and no. Because as B says it might have appeal to some people. What I'm getting at is the stuff that is like unnecessary in classic porn, not any of the deviant stuff. It's like all of a sudden people decide to lick each other's noses or something and passionately at that (some english comic could pick up on this idea for a sketch). Either the producer ran out of ideas or the actors are developping a future sport to see how many unrelated things they can do during a scene.

[Kou]

^eunuch

To each his own, I just don't get the point of watching two people (sometimes more) have incredible hot lusty sex.

[Jordan L]

http://i3.photobucket.com/albums/y87/JoesDead/artie.jpg

[dotnetbeast]

Its porn. As long as theres only one guy, no poop or vomit, gagging during a jeff smoker, and the girl doesnt say full blown sentences while shes gettin railed out, its fine. Who cares if it makes sense or not

[Firefly]

To each his own, I just don't get the point of watching two people (sometimes more) have incredible hot lusty sex.

thats like saying i don't understand why people like driving sports cars.

:D

[Skakruk]

(name ?)
Kim Smith

[T2A`]

Going ass to mouth.

[Jacks:SmirkingRevenge]

Going ass to mouth.

Nothin' wrong with that.

[haslo]

thats like saying i don't understand why people like driving sports cars.

:D

No, it's more like saying I don't understand why people like watching other people driving sports cars ;)

That being said, that picture is ... weird :D I couldn't help but giggle :lol: but to each their own I'd say.

[drakon]

Ummm... yeah, you might want to reconsider that picture.

My thoughts exactly! :eek:

[Kantham]

The long camera focus on some guy's face that's about to load his stuff out.

[Emmet Otter]

The long camera focus on some guy's face that's about to load his stuff out.Especially Ron Jeremy:D

[BobTheBeheader]

Moaning. I can see where it's coming from, but I just don't understand what the turn on is from repeating "OOOH YEAH!!!" 1000 times in a row.

[Big-Al]

Nothin' wrong with that.

really fun when ya both get out the shower :)

[gregori]

the more you try not to make sense out of porn, the happier you'll be in the long run!

[Steyr]

What is with pornstars being entirely naked during their movies, except for their shoes? You'd be surprised how many pornstars leave on their shoes.

[LedZep]

Its porn. As long as theres only one guy ...lol for a fraction of a second there i understood it very wrong

What is with pornstars being entirely naked during their movies, except for their shoes? You'd be surprised how many pornstars leave on their shoes.shoes are for easy locomotion across difficult terrain soldier!

as for me, I find almost everything hot if it is the right person and is done genuinely. I don't really like involving feces in sex though but that's just me :p

but yeah azura, i don't think there is too much figure out about that girl licking her knee, i mean it might be some kind of deviation from classical porn but i bet it was staged, or poorly improvised either way :p plus porn was not around for that long, but im sure there was some knee lickage in sex thousands of years ago :D

btw all i watch are just short bursts, and a whole lot of them (in a session), you know the more you are exposed to the more you can come up with, but the more you dwell on the specifics the more boring you become :p

[Kaithofis]

Someone ordered: I deliver

http://www.kaithofis.acrophony.co.uk/Punk.jpg

This also would make no sense in porn, so it's on-topic too!

And another edit: Yay! 666 posts!

[Jacks:SmirkingRevenge]

Moaning. I can see where it's coming from, but I just don't understand what the turn on is from repeating "OOOH YEAH!!!" 1000 times in a row.

It's acting.

Those bimbos are NOT having that many orgasms. If they are, they're nowhere near as powerful as their glass-shattering screams would lead you to believe...

[Skakruk]

Moaning. I can see where it's coming from, but I just don't understand what the turn on is from repeating "OOOH YEAH!!!" 1000 times in a row.

Neither can I :)

[dotnetbeast]

Especially Ron Jeremy:D

He makes me feel sick. Hes whats wrong with porn.

[Jacks:SmirkingRevenge]

What, no love for the short, fat, half bald Latino guy with the oversized tool?

[Jordan L]

Vegetable porn doesn't make sense either
http://www.apple2.org.za/gswv/me/Graphics/This.n.That/Mr.and.Mrs.Carrot.Top.JPEG

[Fuzzle]

Something that always cracks me up in porn is when chicks have their strapon blown and moan.

As for things in general that don't make sense in porn; Japan.

/snip one was posted here a while ago, but rejoice as there now is a /snip

Edit by NeoNite: Watch what you're linking to ...

[Sine Deviance]

Porn doesn't do anything for me anyways so I just don't watch it.

[dotnetbeast]

What, no love for the short, fat, half bald Latino guy with the oversized tool, who happens to look like mario?

Yes. No love for that guy.

[LedZep]

jealous


:D

[Adelheid]

Anal Gaping.
"Oooh yeah baby, I can't wait to **** that cute ass, let's have a look in there!"
What?! Whyyyyy? I don't want to see her breakfast!

[Balton]

What, no love for the short, fat, half bald Latino guy with the oversized tool?

I don't udnerstand how almost every guy that's seen a porno recognizes his face.

[Rambowjo]

Yep, even the description was enough for me to remember. When I was at lan party with my clan, one of the guys started a porno on a pretty big monitor, like, 42". Anyway, I was asleep though, and it was in the room where we all slept. I woke up and looked up, and this fat guy - Ron Jeremy - was walking about giving oral to 10 women sitting in chairs. That was like, really weird. Scarred for life D:

[Al]

Anal Gaping.
"Oooh yeah baby, I can't wait to **** that cute ass, let's have a look in there!"
What?! Whyyyyy? I don't want to see her breakfast!

lol

Agreed.

[Jacks:SmirkingRevenge]

I don't udnerstand how almost every guy that's seen a porno recognizes his face.

He's a freakin' icon man!

http://www.post-gazette.com/pg/images/200710/20071029ho_jeremy.1_500.jpg

I also saw him speak at my school. Our campus grabbed him on his tour of universities doing this debate about pornography. It was him debating this guy about the place of porno in our society. The guy is a recovering porn-addict who apparently, over the course of just 2 years, lost his wife/kids and job to porn.

Which I don't understand at all, but it made for a great presentation. But seriously, what did he do? Sit around and fap so much that he just stopped going to work or talking to his family?? Some people can get addicted to anything I guess :rolleyes:

[Big-Al]

^looks a bit like Borat :p

[dotnetbeast]

jealous


:D

Of what? Im a brother. I wear 13s if you know what I mean.

[Big-Al]

Of what? Im a brother. I wear 13s if you know what I mean.

13 year olds? :hmm:

[GotBeer?]

You know the old joke where a man sees a dog licking himself and says that if he could do that, he'd never leave the house? Ron Jeremy is the real-life answer to that joke. I don't know if that's still possible with as much weight as he's put on, though.

[dotnetbeast]

13 year olds? :hmm:

No, Chris Hanson. Not 13 year olds.

[TossMonkey]

I only watch amateur stuff anyway, but I don't understand it when they try to pass real pornstars off as amateurs when they're clearly not. My only real gripe tbh.

Though I do think tribadism is a bit of a farce, though hot.

[BobTheBeheader]

I only watch amateur stuff anyway, but I don't understand it when they try to pass real pornstars off as amateurs when they're clearly not. My only real gripe tbh.

Though I do think tribadism is a bit of a farce, though hot.Yes, I think the thing is that there isn't much of a rubbing motion or anything.

Personally, I think most porn is a farce, and I actually feel a little sorry for the porn stars.

Thats why I like hentai. It might not be real, but at least it makes no pretensions at being real. It's not a lie. Plus you can see anything you want, no matter how strange it might be. If you are on #fragbu, you probably know that one of my "interests" is tentacle porn. Now that's just not something you see in reality. (Although right now I'm downloading a live action adaptation of "Angel of Darkness")

[dotnetbeast]

I only watch amateur stuff anyway, but I don't understand it when they try to pass real pornstars off as amateurs when they're clearly not. My only real gripe tbh.



To me it really doesnt matter to me. It only gets bad when there is more than one guy. More than one "lightsaber" is a major botch.

[Jordan L]

Good porn is when it keeps the guys face off of the film most of the time, The cameraman is a Woman, and its not rough fast sex :B

[TossMonkey]

Good porn is when it keeps the guys face off of the film most of the time, The cameraman is a Woman, and its not rough fast sex :B

The major problem with guys in your porn is that you may blow your load when it cuts to the guy.

Rough sex is always a lark IMO, though I do like all woman (inc camera) since I find women talking about other women to be super hot. Like fire.

[DarQraven]

The major problem with guys in your porn is that you may blow your load when it cuts to the guy.


Very true....urgh...
Another thing I really don't understand in porn (besides toilet hardware fetishes of course), is the obsession with coming on someone's face/boobs/etc.
I mean .. what the hell? What could possibly be erotic about your girl getting their eyes full of semen?

[Kno One]

If you are on #fragbu, you probably know that one of my "interests" is tentacle porn. Now that's just not something you see in reality.

What you havn't seen any Japanese squid porn yet?

[Kantham]

Good porn is when it keeps the guys face off of the film most of the time, The cameraman is a Woman, and its not rough fast sex :B

Welcome to page 1.

[MoogleRancha]

I hate it when the girl is forced to brush her teeth with the semen. Or if it's fed with a spoon. They're both really weird.

[GotBeer?]

To me it really doesnt matter to me. It only gets bad when there is more than one guy. More than one "lightsaber" is a major botch.Yes. Crossing swords is bad.


Another thing I really don't understand in porn (besides toilet hardware fetishes of course), is the obsession with coming on someone's face/boobs/etc.
I mean .. what the hell? What could possibly be erotic about your girl getting their eyes full of semen?
"Money shot" or it's not real, basically, with a little bit of degredation thrown in. Which brings me to: 20 guys jerking themselves off so they can all unload on the naked girl in the middle of the group. What's the turn-on except for the complete degredation of the girl? I don't get it.

[Big-Al]

Yes. Crossing swords is bad.


"Money shot" or it's not real, basically, with a little bit of degredation thrown in. Which brings me to: 20 guys jerking themselves off so they can all unload on the naked girl in the middle of the group. What's the turn-on except for the complete degredation of the girl? I don't get it.

fetish.

[BobTheBeheader]

I think any sort of eating/drinking/swallowing cum is weird.

[Big-Al]

I think any sort of eating/drinking/swallowing cum is weird.

never been sucked off?

it's full of vitamins, but if you have a bad diet, yeah it'll taste like burnt rubber.

[_Zd_Phoenix_]

I think any sort of eating/drinking/swallowing cum is weird.

I'm starting to think you're a nun ...

[Vers Vlees]

Indian Asian men or AZN like Chinese/Korean/Jap in US porn dont exist in porn movies.

In other news seeing we are talking p0rn & filthy fetishes the Dutch Parliament has been discussing a ban animal porn. It pains me to say it but the Netherlands is one of the main producers of this kind disgusting filth.(things a small country can be great in:lol: )
But then again people do really love animals over here not to mention we a political party for Animals who have 2 seats in parliament and they really loooovvee animals. I mean they proposed a ban on fish tanks so no more goldfishes for you. (they are favor of the ban tough but seriously they love animals more then people its like having PETA/ALF in congress/parliament)

btw dont these incompentent members of parliament have more important things to do then to debate about a ban on fish tanks :rolleyes: I guess they really earned that 30% salary raise.

[Hadmar]

In other news seeing we are talking p0rn & filthy fetishes the Dutch Parliament has been discussing a ban animal porn. It pains me to say it but the Netherlands is one of the main producers of this kind disgusting filth.They are taking another right away from you, that's all that's gonna happen. You should be happy that it's legal and fight for your rights even if you don't make use of them. In sorta-kinda related news, there was just a ruling in Germany that the law that says incest is illegal is not against the constitution. That gets a boo. :tdown:. The fact, that the ruling basically said eugenics are in line with our constitution gets a double plus ungood boo. :mad::tdown:

[GotBeer?]

So Germany trying to prevent flipper-babies is a bad thing?

[8-4-7-2]

The problem is that technically the law says that sex between siblings is illegal. It doesn't mention offspring and the guy in the case in question got himself sterilized just because of the risks (edit: although apparently that was after they already had four kids O_o Idiots).

Paradoxically the ruling argued a lot with reproduction, though that was somewhat irrelevant here. They also said that since only intercourse is illegal, they'd have other options (like oral sex). Which is pretty silly.

[Hadmar]

So Germany trying to prevent flipper-babies is a bad thing?

Yes. And funny enough the sex is illegal, not making babies. You can in vitro fertilize your relatives if you want as far as I know.


Insta 84ed. Edited for viewing pleasure.

[Jacks:SmirkingRevenge]

I mean .. what the hell? What could possibly be erotic about your girl getting their eyes full of semen?

You never once wanted to come on your girls face??

[Trynant]

Does it make sense that it always starts with a girl putting a wiener in her mouth? I mean, always. Unless there's lack of men, even then, if there's a strap-on, it's always in the mouth first. WTH?

[dotnetbeast]

You never once wanted to come on your girls face??

If youre getting a money Jeff Smoker, theres no way to avoid it.
I like to call it the "Spotted Owl"
One thing I have seen recently is when the girl is bored, and you can tell. Kills the mood for me.

[Jordan L]

I can't stand when I see the guys do signals to let the partner no its time to change positions in the scene their doing. Porn in some cases, takes a lot of acting, but sometimes it's executed bad.

[Big-Al]

One thing I have seen recently is when the girl is bored, and you can tell. Kills the mood for me.

yes, agreed :)

[Steyr]

I hate it when the girl is forced to brush her teeth with the semen. Or if it's fed with a spoon. They're both really weird.

Sauce?

[Vers Vlees]

They are taking another right away from you, that's all that's gonna happen. You should be happy that it's legal and fight for your rights even if you don't make use of them.

I dunno man I find animal sex quite disgusting and it isnt exactly a right I want to fight for :p but on the other hand if people are in to it its their own business. The main point of the debate was of beastility should be considered animal abuse. The Left, Right and PETA like political Animal party support the ban because they find it animal abuse.

[[VaLkyR]Anubis]

Porn stuff = :zzz:

[SleepyHe4d]

This one was posted here a while ago, but rejoice as there now is a followup.

When it was posted here it was along with the followup. >.>

I'm starting to think you're a nun ...

Using hentai as one of those nun-loopholes and everything! :mad:

[toniglandyl]

Using hentai as one of those nun-loopholes and everything! :mad:

well nuns can get it in the butt so they don't get devirginised ;)

on topic : strange stuff in pr0n ? well I'll talk about strange stuff in hentai (waaay more personal experience) : girls liking getting raped. almost all hentai have it, and I always find it disturbing. it seems that every anime girl's fantasm is to get raped.
that and the fact that the girls almost always have a huge tirade (sp ? is it even in english ?) about what they feel or how deep it's going or blabla... :/ in some doujins (porn mangas) you see the girl(s) and all around it's covered with text.:(

[Hadmar]

and it isnt exactly a right I want to fight for :pHeh, I can understand that.
but on the other hand if people are in to it its their own business.And that's the spirit.

I'll not convert this into a pro contra abuse discussion. Yes, I'm generous today. Everyone take a deep breath and be grateful. :D

[Azura]

Here's another example of weird stuff: choking. Now why on earth would you suddenly want to squeeze your partner's neck ?

[Gundato]

Here's another example of weird stuff: choking. Now why on earth would you suddenly want to squeeze your partner's neck ?

The same reason that there are now PSAs that basically say "If you masturbate, please don't tie a belt around your neck while you do it"

[Vers Vlees]

Here's another example of weird stuff: choking. Now why on earth would you suddenly want to squeeze your partner's neck ?

If you choke yourself dont you get to a certain where you get high or something like that.(yeah I saw something about this on TV IIRC) I'm pretty sure this called auto erotic asphyxiation but correct me if Im wrong.

[BobTheBeheader]

So there was a bot lady or something on #fragbu last night, (well, it might have not been a bot, but it didn't pass MY Turing Test).

[0:55:33] <luvsdickNcounterstrike> want to watch me undress
[0:56:20] <@hyrulian_> wait, loves dick? ^^
[0:56:39] <luvsdickNcounterstrike> is anyone as horny as i am
[0:56:53] <Airmoran> You're on the internet, so probably
[0:57:04] <BobTheBeheader> well, from the sound of it, you are pretty horny. I'm not though
[0:57:12] <luvsdickNcounterstrike> i want to have a SEXY battle with someone on CS or something
[0:57:25] <@hyrulian_> man, where's cymek
[0:57:28] <@hyrulian_> i think he'd do that
[0:57:41] <@hyrulian_> afaik he loves dick and counterstrike too
[0:57:49] <luvsdickNcounterstrike> if only one of you lived in dallas
[0:57:49] <BobTheBeheader> ok man, if games had an impact on my level of sexual arousal, CS would be a MAJOR turn off
[0:58:03] <luvsdickNcounterstrike> i just like nerdy boys
[0:58:15] <luvsdickNcounterstrike> i would let you **** me in the ass if i saw you in real life
[0:59:09] <luvsdickNcounterstrike> but i have a digital camera handy
[0:59:12] <luvsdickNcounterstrike> and AIM
[0:59:32] <luvsdickNcounterstrike> if soemone wants to trade private picturers
[1:00:15] <luvsdickNcounterstrike> i am a little oler than you guys im sure
[1:00:22] <@hyrulian_> O RLY?
[1:00:40] <luvsdickNcounterstrike> but i cant help like younger game geeks
[1:00:45] <luvsdickNcounterstrike> 26
[1:01:00] <luvsdickNcounterstrike> im a hot mom, without a kid

Anyways, right before hyru kicked it, I decided to start messing around.

[1:11:05] <BobTheBeheader> I want ur vagina
[1:11:15] <luvsdickNcounterstrike> you can have it
[1:11:25] <BobTheBeheader> thx
[1:11:27] <luvsdickNcounterstrike> if i can slide on ur face
[1:11:44] <BobTheBeheader> facesitting? o_O umm nothx

Facesitting is something else I don't get.

[1:13:36] <BobTheBeheader> I'm going to bed, and I'm going to try not to have any ****ed up dreams about how luvsdick wants to suffocate me with it's vagina

[T2A`]

Facial tribadism? F**king hot.

[cuddles]

Heres one I dont ****ing get: Armpit ****.............. like theres enough body parts and holes you can do....... :rolleyes:


http://packy.dardan.com/walky/albums/gwalla/ako.thumb.gif

[BobTheBeheader]

Facial tribadism? F**king hot.well that's one thing, but it's the suffocation part that makes no sense to me.

[furby]

Scat & Piss consumption.


WTF?

[T2A`]

Scat & Piss consumption. WTF?What if they spit? :-)

[Jordan L]

#fragbu, where the cyber goes on

[Airmoran]

#fragbu, where the cyber goes on
...or when Jackal asks *every* girl on #fragbu to show her tits. I think his record so far is 0.

It only works on Bangbros, you twit. And even then it still makes no sense. :mad:

[Dark Pulse]

Things that don't make sense in porn? Trying to make sense of things that don't make sense in porn.

I win the thread.

[toniglandyl]

...or when Jackal asks *every* girl on #fragbu to show her tits. I think his record so far is 0.

It only works on Bangbros, you twit. And even then it still makes no sense. :mad:

we had some nice cleavage shot from igoy once ;)

[Vers Vlees]

well that's one thing, but it's the suffocation part that makes no sense to me.

Well some people are into erotic asphyxiation to highten the sexual statisfaction. (dont ask me about it I'm not into that choking ****)
Its just like ass smacking

[-Jes-]

Furries.


There, I said it. The Paradox will now CONSUME us all!

MWHUAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHaHaHaHahaHAhahahAHahaHahah...

[dotnetbeast]

Things that don't make sense in porn? Trying to make sense of things that don't make sense in porn.

I win the thread.

Now youre wrong.

[BobTheBeheader]

Well some people are into erotic asphyxiation to highten the sexual statisfaction. (dont ask me about it I'm not into that choking ****)
Its just like ass smackingWell I don't know, I think a little *light* spanking can be awesome. Unfortunately, its usually either no spanking, or spanking to the point where the girl is nearly in tears. Which is just really ****ed up.

[Jordan L]

Or when a guy loads it up in the girls ass, then she holds a wine glass under her anus to push the load into the glass, thus calling it a cream pie.

[MonsOlympus]

Yes. Crossing swords is bad.


"Money shot" or it's not real, basically, with a little bit of degredation thrown in. Which brings me to: 20 guys jerking themselves off so they can all unload on the naked girl in the middle of the group. What's the turn-on except for the complete degredation of the girl? I don't get it.


Grab your stick!
HOLDING IT!
Heat 'em up!
SMOKIN'!
Bang 'em hard!
READY!
Let's show this prehistoric bitch how we do things downtown... THROW IT!

There's something very important I forgot to tell you.
What?
Don't cross the streams.
Why?
It would be bad.
I'm fuzzy on the whole good/bad thing. What do you mean, "bad"?
Try to imagine all life as you know it stopping instantaneously and every molecule in your body exploding at the speed of light.
Total protonic reversal.
Right. That's bad. Okay. All right. Important safety tip. Thanks, Egon.

He slimed me.

[Steyr]

Or when a guy loads it up in the girls ass, then she holds a wine glass under her anus to push the load into the glass, thus calling it a cream pie.

Sauce?

[Jacks:SmirkingRevenge]

Or when a guy loads it up in the girls ass, then she holds a wine glass under her anus to push the load into the glass, thus calling it a cream pie.

Whats worse is when someone ends up drinking the glass.

Or when someone ends up drinking it directly from her leaky, ravaged hole. Meanwhile the camera guy is all "yeah thats it baby push that sh*t out" :lol:

[GotBeer?]

I never realized until just now how dirty Ghostbusters really was! :eek:

[MonsOlympus]

Yeah I dunno why but when I saw that comment on crossing lightsabers it reminded me of ghostbusters :p

[MoogleRancha]

Whats worse is when someone ends up drinking the glass.

Or when someone ends up drinking it directly from her leaky, ravaged hole. Meanwhile the camera guy is all "yeah thats it baby push that sh*t out" :lol:

Felching!

[Jacks:SmirkingRevenge]

Felching!

Ah, I see you're a connoisseur ;)

[BobTheBeheader]

Ok this is just getting gross now.

[Steyr]

****ting Dick Nipples. That's what doesn't make sense in porn.

[furby]

Footjobs.

[awaw]

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=rr9FQG4jXuA :lol:

In case someone doesn't speak german, here's a quick translation:
She: That's the broken electrical panel - could you have a look at it?
He: Willingly, but why is there straw?
She: Why are you wearing a mask?
He: Hmm, well.... why don't give me a head?

[Vers Vlees]

Well I dug this one up from the depths of my harddisk. Most of you probally know this anyway. I thought it was fitting for this thread.

:) 30 things we can learn from porn.
1. Women wear high heels to bed.
2. Men are never impotent.
3. When going down on a woman, 10 seconds is more than satisfactory.
4. If a woman gets busted masturbating by a strange man, she will not
scream with embarassment, but rather insist he have sex with her.
5. Women smile appreciatively when men splat them in the face with sperm.
6. Women enjoy having sex with ugly, middle-aged men.
7. Women moan uncontrollably when giving a blowjob.
8. Women always orgasm when men do.
9. A blowjob will always get a woman off a speeding ticket.
10. All women make noise..
11. People in the 70's couldn't **** unless there was a wild guitar solo in the background.
12. Those tits are real.
13. A common and enjoyable sexual practice for a man is to take his
half-erect penis and slap it repeatedly on a woman's butt.
14. Men always groan "OH YEAH" when they cum.
15. If there is two of them they "high five" each other (and the girl isn't disgusted).
16. Double penetration makes a woman smile.
17. Asian men don't exist.
18. If you come across a guy and his girlfriend having sex in the bushes, the boyfriend doesn't knock the **** out of you if you shove your cock in his girlfriends mouth.
19. There's a plot.
20. When taking a woman from behind, a man can really excite her by giving her a gentle slap on the butt.
21. Nurses suck patients cocks.
22. Men always pull out.
23. When your girlfriend busts you getting head from her best friend,
she'll only be momentarily pissed off before ****ing the both of you.
24. Women never have headaches....or periods.
25. When a woman is sucking a man's cock, it's important for him to remind her to "suck it".
26. *******s are clean.
27. A man ejaculating on a woman's butt is a satisfying result for all
parties concerned.
28. Women always look pleasantly surprised when they open a man's trousers and find a cock there.
29. Men don't have to beg.
30. When standing during a blowjob, a man will always place one hand firmly on the back of the kneeling woman's head and the other
proudly on his hip.


Also one of the things I dont get is rimming. I bet the one who recieves could enjoy it I guess but the one who gives it well:P

[Jordan L]

It doesn't make sense why studios allow the performers a.k.a. females to wear piercings during the video. I find woman with pierced nipples and Clits as a Huge Turn Off. I won't even watch the scene if piercings like those are apparent. A pierced tongue is bad enough as it is. Also, A pierced Clit just reminds me how much of a Slut they are, and that they probably sucked off the the person that gave them the piercing.

[Balton]

It doesn't make sense why studios allow the performers a.k.a. females to wear piercings during the video. I find woman with pierced nipples and Clits as a Huge Turn Off. I won't even watch the scene if piercings like those are apparent. A pierced tongue is bad enough as it is. Also, A pierced Clit just reminds me how much of a Slut they are, and that they probably sucked off the the person that gave them the piercing.

says the guy with a pentagram for an avatar. did you have to sacrifice a goat to get yourself that avatar? silly boy ;)

[Jordan L]

says the guy with a pentagram for an avatar. did you have to sacrifice a goat to get yourself that avatar? silly boy ;)

Nay

[AsToRoTh]

Im not a homophobe but for me the wrongest of the wrong is the bi-sexual threesome vids.... really off putting when you dont realise thats what you're watching heh.

Oh yeah.. and why felching is a bad idea... http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=W0pNeDMowCY

[_Zd_Phoenix_]

Also one of the things I dont get is rimming. I bet the one who recieves could enjoy it I guess but the one who gives it well:P
Well maybe there's a reason why gay guys are oft associated with cleanliness ... :p
Im not a homophobe but for me the wrongest of the wrong is the bi-sexual threesome vids.... really off putting when you dont realise thats what you're watching heh.
Do you just mean MMF, or are you including MFF in that too?

[AsToRoTh]

MMF

[Jordan L]

" bad " meaning Trashy in my previous post on piercings, One thing that does make sense is Classy Porn, atleast to me. Not sure on what you prefer though balton :shake:

[BobTheBeheader]

19. There's a plot. Well, that depends. I've seen hentai with very well done plots before. With interesting characters and a nice moral at the end of the story. Oh, and did I mention tentacle sex?

[Fuzz]

Now this thread is all nice and squiggly. What's with all this intimacy issues? Doesn't make any sense wasting so much time with relations in real life or watching them in video sequences.

[Jacks:SmirkingRevenge]

Now this thread is all nice and squiggly. What's with all this intimacy issues? Doesn't make any sense wasting so much time with relations in real life or watching them in video sequences.


So you're not a fan of real relations and you're not a fan of porn.

...

And you continue to breathe, why?

[N1ghtmare]

Doesn't make any sense wasting so much time with relations in real life

You realize thats the basic point in your existence, right? You know, to reproduce, carry on the human race...

[Kantham]

We can do it, it doesn't mean we have to reproduce.

[Fuzz]

I finally remember to return to this thread.

If you ask the question what's the meaning of life, my life, your life, etc then the conclusion will be that there is no meaning, existence is pointless. My personal solution is to just don't. Never ask that particular question.

I want to have lots of fun. Generally I dislike the thought of reproduction because it's lots and lots of wasted time and effort for absolutely nothing. Sexual relations likewise.

Yes, those relations can be beautiful, but the probability of being exploited is 100% in the kind of society we live in.

I live, free. Mayhap people touch themselves at night, but I have more fun and important things to do.

Oh, did I crash this thread? Sorry!

Lot's of things that really turn people on are things that doesn't make much sense. If it seems natural or animal to do, it could in fact be very satisfying to many.

In erotic scenes women are often portrayed as distant, to reach out to people watching the productions. Referring to the woman licking her knee in the sexual act, basically she is doing it for you, not the person inside her. Perhaps it makes it easier to pretend that you are the one doing her.

Go ahead, waste your precious time, I don't mind at all. At least enjoy it.

[Big-Al]

rim jobs are good

[-Jes-]

Well, that depends. I've seen hentai with very well done plots before. With interesting characters and a nice moral at the end of the story. Oh, and did I mention tentacle sex?

Words Worth could actually make a great anime if it were to be "cleaned" of sex. :o

[carmatic]

most amazing thread in buf that ever i come across

@Fuzz: so am i right guessing that 'Mistress' title has some validity in terms of gender... i.e. are you female? im finding it kinda hard to seriously take what youve said as coming from a guy and im sure that other people in this thread are too

[Airmoran]

Soapbox rant.
...Jack and so forth were just pulling your chain, you dolt.

[BobTheBeheader]

Words Worth could actually make a great anime if it were to be "cleaned" of sex. :oI haven't actually seen that one. Maybe I'll check it out sometime. In between all the non-hentai anime.

[rex]

Vore...

[Kou]

Carni...
Vore...

[toniglandyl]

In between all the non-hentai anime.
:lol: thanks for the precision.

[Jacks:SmirkingRevenge]

Generally I dislike the thought of reproduction because it's lots and lots of wasted time and effort for absolutely nothing. Sexual relations likewise.


I'm sorry you'll have to rework this sentence. It looks as though you're trying to say that nothing comes of sexual relations or the act of reproduction which leads me to believe you possess the anatomy (and intellect) of a Ken doll.

[N1ghtmare]

I'm sorry you'll have to rework this sentence. It looks as though you're trying to say that nothing comes of sexual relations or the act of reproduction which leads me to believe you possess the anatomy (and intellect) of a Ken doll.

If he is the ken doll then who is barbie?
0_o

[Jacks:SmirkingRevenge]

For someone who doesn't get anything out of sex or sexual relations?

:lol: there is no Barbie to that Ken.

[BobTheBeheader]

I'm sorry you'll have to rework this sentence. It looks as though you're trying to say that nothing comes of sexual relations or the act of reproduction which leads me to believe you possess the anatomy (and intellect) of a Ken doll.:lol:

[Stilgar]

Why don't they edit those *POP* sounds when the guy slips and his dick eschews out of her hole at a funny angle? It usually makes a sound similar to the opening of a sealed jar - but mushy

*twiiiist*grunt*grunt*POP*

This always cracks me up and kills the moment... Doubly so when the camera is right in there and the pop is the loudest thing to happen during the entire clip.

[Azura]

I'm sorry you'll have to rework this sentence. It looks as though you're trying to say that nothing comes of sexual relations or the act of reproduction which leads me to believe you possess the anatomy (and intellect) of a Ken doll.

http://www.killsometime.com/animations/animation.asp?ID=12

[Jacks:SmirkingRevenge]

http://www.killsometime.com/animations/animation.asp?ID=12

Hmm, I'll have to try sex with my underwear on, looks pretty wild.

[carmatic]

If he is the ken doll then who is barbie?
0_o
guys i have an uneasy feeling that Fluff is actually a girl ... correct me if im wrong ? or am i the one with the issues...

[Rambowjo]

A girl? On BuF? Non-sense.

[Big-Al]

A girl? On BuF? Non-sense.

no wait there was TWD's girlfriend... !

[carmatic]

A girl? On BuF? Non-sense.
gaah! i knew it, these issues of mine must be more serious than i thought... i must seek help

[rex]

Carni...
Vorarephilia (http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Vorarephilia)

[Kou]

Vorarephilia (http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Vorarephilia)

Creeeeeeepy.

[Adelheid]

Vorarephilia (http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Vorarephilia)

Mein Teil!

[Rambowjo]

Guro :-)

[Adelheid]

Guro :-)

I tried watching that stuff once; I couldn't take it seriously. That and the record in my brain seemed to get stuck on "This is arousing how?"

[GotBeer?]

Vorarephilia (http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Vorarephilia)That's not a fetish, that's a freakin' psychological disorder.

[-Jes-]

Vore...

You got that right! :mad:

[Rambowjo]

I tried watching that stuff once; I couldn't take it seriously. That and the record in my brain seemed to get stuck on "This is arousing how?"

U NO, U SHUD TRIE SHOTACON

[SleepyHe4d]

U NO, U SHUD TRIE SHOTACON

Wha? That stuff is good. Wtf am I saying, guro is good too! Preferably if they are at the same time.

[Steyr]

A girl? On BuF? Non-sense.

Refer to Rule #15 (http://www.encyclopediadramatica.com/index.php/Rules_Of_The_Internet)

[MoogleRancha]

That's not a fetish, that's a freakin' psychological disorder.

What about getting off to imagining people with their skin off? Is that a fetish or psychological disorder?

[Lafnboy]

What about when some dude shoots his load and nails the hot teacher in the eye from the back of the classroom?

[edit]Oh wait, I'VE done that before :cool:

[MoogleRancha]

Pfft, sniping's for p*ssies. Point-blank shots to the head are where it's at.

[Fuzz]

Come on, people. You seriously don't think that wanting, planning and having sex is a huge waste of time when you could be playing or modding any game in the Unreal series? Figures you are spending more time here, socialising, than actually playing the games.

So much time and then just a five minute intercourse with a two second plain orgasm. Think about that, it doesn't make any sense in real life, not in erotic media either.

You also think a persons gender is important, that must be the base stock of any sexual discrimination in the world today.

Obviously people attracted to a thread like this would have a rather large appetite for sexuality in general. Judging a person from a single sentence is not very wise either. Expressions like the ones in Penn and Teller's BS are often though of as venting hot air with more emotions than factual substance. That seems much more sound today because this emotional garbage is considered fine art in an otherwise numb world. The point is, if you missed it, proving a hypotetis of a way to live ones life start with confrontation. The first though is probably not expressed in it's fullest clarity but it's a good start, a lot better than being a silent bystander to everything in your life.

Wasting time arguing with or about me is your loss I'm afraid since you could watch all kinds of free porn instead, touching yourselves in the right places. You are probably more often sexually aroused than you clip your toenails anyway.

Quote of the moment:
It's me versus the world, at least you should get used to it. That's what I like about deathmatch too.
-Fuzz

Talking about not having sex at all is considered issues but talking about and playing games involving killing people for fun is not?

[Balton]

Come on, people. You seriously don't think that wanting, planning and having sex is a huge waste of time when you could be playing or modding any game in the Unreal series? Figures you are spending more time here, socialising, than actually playing the games.

So much time and then just a five minute intercourse with a two second plain orgasm. Think about that, it doesn't make any sense in real life, not in erotic media either.

You also think a persons gender is important, that must be the base stock of any sexual discrimination in the world today.

Obviously people attracted to a thread like this would have a rather large appetite for sexuality in general. Judging a person from a single sentence is not very wise either. Expressions like the ones in Penn and Teller's BS are often though of as venting hot air with more emotions than factual substance. That seems much more sound today because this emotional garbage is considered fine art in an otherwise numb world. The point is, if you missed it, proving a hypotetis of a way to live ones life start with confrontation. The first though is probably not expressed in it's fullest clarity but it's a good start, a lot better than being a silent bystander to everything in your life.

Wasting time arguing with or about me is your loss I'm afraid since you could watch all kinds of free porn instead, touching yourselves in the right places. You are probably more often sexually aroused than you clip your toenails anyway.

Quote of the moment:
It's me versus the world, at least you should get used to it. That's what I like about deathmatch too.
-Fuzz

Talking about not having sex at all is considered issues but talking about and playing games involving killing people for fun is not?

epic post of fail!

you totally got no clue or you never had good sex, which judging by your 5 minutes comment seems very true.

And raising video games above everything else also fails even if we're on board dedicated to the U games.

edit: ofcourse if you're just trying to pull chains for reactions you've succeeded and will suceed even more.

[Big-Al]

epic post of fail!

you totally got no clue or you never had good sex, which judging by your 5 minutes comment seems very true.

And raising video games above everything else also fails even if we're on board dedicated to the U games.

edit: ofcourse if you're just trying to pull chains for reactions you've succeeded and will suceed even more.

Fuzz is right... sex is nothing near being as awesome as beer :D

[Unreality]

ah pubes

[Kantham]

Come on, people. You seriously don't think that wanting, planning and having sex is a huge waste of time when you could be playing or modding any game in the Unreal series? Figures you are spending more time here, socialising, than actually playing the games.

WTF? :lol:
Fanboi.

I'll do both though.

[Jackal]

Come on, people. You seriously don't think that wanting, planning and having sex is a huge waste of time when you could be playing or modding any game in the Unreal series? Figures you are spending more time here, socialising, than actually playing the games.

So much time and then just a five minute intercourse with a two second plain orgasm. Think about that, it doesn't make any sense in real life, not in erotic media either.

You also think a persons gender is important, that must be the base stock of any sexual discrimination in the world today.

Obviously people attracted to a thread like this would have a rather large appetite for sexuality in general. Judging a person from a single sentence is not very wise either. Expressions like the ones in Penn and Teller's BS are often though of as venting hot air with more emotions than factual substance. That seems much more sound today because this emotional garbage is considered fine art in an otherwise numb world. The point is, if you missed it, proving a hypotetis of a way to live ones life start with confrontation. The first though is probably not expressed in it's fullest clarity but it's a good start, a lot better than being a silent bystander to everything in your life.

Wasting time arguing with or about me is your loss I'm afraid since you could watch all kinds of free porn instead, touching yourselves in the right places. You are probably more often sexually aroused than you clip your toenails anyway.

Quote of the moment:
It's me versus the world, at least you should get used to it. That's what I like about deathmatch too.
-Fuzz

Talking about not having sex at all is considered issues but talking about and playing games involving killing people for fun is not?


Can you make this post more understandable please?

[Gundato]

Quote of the moment:
It's me versus the world, at least you should get used to it. That's what I like about deathmatch too.
-Fuzz


Did he actually quote himself? Wow...

[Kou]

Watching people have sex isn't appealing to me. I'm waiting until I get married to have sex myself, but that's just a personal opinion. I'm a helpless romantic and want to save it only for whomever she is if I find her.

Ironically, I'm not Christian, but I'm still messed up in the head.

[T2A`]

I'm waiting until I get married to have sex myself, but that's just a personal opinion.Considering you have a 25% chance of getting a disease (http://www.cnn.com/2008/HEALTH/conditions/03/11/teen.std.ap/index.html), that's probably for the better. :p

[rex]

I'm waiting until I get married to have sex with myselfFixed

[Azura]

Watching people have sex isn't appealing to me. I'm waiting until I get married to have sex myself, but that's just a personal opinion. I'm a helpless romantic and want to save it only for whomever she is if I find her.

Ironically, I'm not Christian, but I'm still messed up in the head.

I understand the sentiment but that sort of thing doesn't come that naturally. There's a chance that you won't be happy with the way your first experience turns out. As one doctor put it, "it [sex] isn't dirty".

[Rambowjo]

WTF? :lol:
Fanboi.

I'll do both though.

Am I supposed to get a mental image of you getting head, while playing Unreal?

[Fuzz]

Balton, you're very convincing, but I refer to people in general. I can have sex for hours and reach multiple ecstatic orgasms at pure power of will.

Reflecting on it and thinking about things I could do instead makes me want more from life than being stuck with a single person and an irreversible decision of having a child. Sooner or later I'll probably have a family of my own, but I'm not that concerned at the moment.

I also have to confess on some other charges, I'm pulling a lot of legs with my erratic expressions. My true intentions are unknown even to me.

Ones sexuality can be very healthy if it's hygienic. Doing it solo is safe, naturally.

As you can see, I can argue for almost any philosophical position, which makes all seemingly self evident and important choices so ambiguous in the end.

One thing I have noticed, you can't force someone to love you, you can't even force someone to like you remotely. On the other hand you can easily antagonize anyone and that is how all relation will wind up as a failure. I have you barking up my tree to prove my point already.

Killing or otherwise hurting people are of course not the same thing as having sex with them. Video game violence is commonly accepted sexuality likewise. I think we are talking about the morality of not having sex. People are not having sex all the time, they are not even thinking about sex all the time and sometimes they are not even aware of the sexual possibilities they actually have. When I say I don't do that at all it's odd because it's different from what you usually do and having a fully reasonable person on the other side could be frightening since I could inspire people you otherwise would like to have in your own house.

I have lot's of friends and they usually don't mind my psychological experiments just as long as I keep it emotionally fun, almost ridiculous even.

Just asking this, what makes chastity so wrong when you can achieve intense orgasms without even touching yourself?

[Jackal]

I can have sex for hours and reach multiple ecstatic orgasms at pure power of will.
...........

Just asking this, what makes chastity so wrong when you can achieve intense orgasms without even touching yourself?

http://media.canada.com/1785a528-bef3-4f04-af39-9312146bfd98/eddiekaythomas.jpg

[Airmoran]

It has been a really, really good month for OT.

[Jackal]

But can it top last months "XTC is a pedo"?

Stay tuned to find out!

[MoogleRancha]

We'll never know.

[carmatic]

Ones sexuality can be very healthy if it's hygienic. Doing it solo is safe, naturally.
remember,
http://upload.wikimedia.org/wikipedia/en/1/11/God-kills-kitten.jpg

One thing I have noticed, you can't force someone to love you, you can't even force someone to like you remotely. On the other hand you can easily antagonize anyone and that is how all relation will wind up as a failure.
why do you try to 'force' people to like you? cant you just like, be nice to them or something

I have lot's of friends and they usually don't mind my psychological experiments just as long as I keep it emotionally fun, almost ridiculous even.

emotionally fun? is 'fun' not tied to the emotion of happiness? is messing with other people's emotions 'fun' for you?
When I say I don't do that at all it's odd because it's different from what you usually do and having a fully reasonable person on the other side could be frightening since I could inspire people you otherwise would like to have in your own house. go ahead, tell people not to have sex ...


Just asking this, what makes chastity so wrong when you can achieve intense orgasms without even touching yourself?

http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Chastity
Chastity refers to sexual behaviour of a man or woman acceptable to the ethical norms and guidelines of a certain culture, civilization or religion
by definition chastity is acceptable... so what makes chastity so wrong again? whatever your doing to achieve your intense orgasms would have like nothing to do with what other people say is ok or not ok

and Fuzz, you have been talking about and against porn in general, when what we are trying to talk about is things that dont make sense in porn, hence the title of the thread

[BobTheBeheader]

Since when did this thread turn into a philosophical discussion?

[carmatic]

well i guess it was ever since i had the urge to reply to Fuzz... that, or when Fuzz decided to post in here

[Jordan L]

I can have sex for hours and reach multiple ecstatic orgasms at pure power of will.

Has this been put in the gold book of quotes yet.


http://imagecache2.allposters.com/images/pic/ATA/22772DC~Wonder-Woman-Posters.jpg

[Rambowjo]

@qa "<Fuzz> I can have sex for hours and reach multiple ecstatic orgasms at pure power of will."

[Azura]

Ones sexuality can be very healthy if it's hygienic. Doing it solo is safe, naturally.

Its not a 100% safe. The danger is that get used to solo (not han solo you pervs !) and have trouble doing normal sex. Or you can get so used to hard core porn such that you have trouble getting aroused by the idea of convential sex.

[BobTheBeheader]

Its not a 100% safe. The danger is that get used to solo (not han solo you pervs !) and have trouble doing normal sex. Or you can get so used to hard core porn such that you have trouble getting aroused by the idea of convential sex.Yeah, that's a worrisome thing.

[Steyr]

I just read fuzz's message, and I'm starting to think he's stealing my crazy... I need a thicker tinfoil hat.

[SleepyHe4d]

Yeah, that's a worrisome thing.

I heard there was goggles that make people look cell-shaded...




Okay, I lied.

[hyrulian]

Its not a 100% safe. The danger is that get used to solo (not han solo you pervs !) and have trouble doing normal sex. Or you can get so used to hard core porn such that you have trouble getting aroused by the idea of convential sex.

It's true. Pretty much, doing it solo and/or with porn is fine, as long as you don't become reliant on it.

[Fuzz]

Figures it will take a while to get things right. To sort them out so to say.

I'm not against pornography at all. Perhaps not even prostitution, just as long as they are free to chose their clients and so on.

What I was thinking is that men is being exploited financially all the time, when there are better things in life than sex. It's not only the economical aspect that I am thinking of, they give up their lives, emotionally, physically, spend their time, to put some woman on a pillar just to look at her and make her pregnant. People make up all kind of irrational arguments for keeping it up, because it feels so good. They are fooling themselves. They call it passionate or romantic, having a good time, etc.

Being nice won't always work to make people like you. It could have the opposite effect as they find themselves feeling gratitude guilt, that they have to repay the deed somehow. This is flawed because there is a zero progress dilemma in all this. What people really should do is earn some money and most people don't cooperate on a private level.

You are arguing that it's immoral to be chased. I won't fall for that.

Why is sex so entertaining? It's more like a drug. I rather go for an exotic expedition where I have never been before, just as long as it doesn't involve copulating with the local population. Having sex all the time is retarded. There are so many other things that people can do at their spare time. All sorts of recreational activities.

I'm not against sex or relations either. It's just that I rather do other things that make me think.

What I do is put things into perspective and remove any emotions from the equation completely, just to see what we got. I think it's funny to see how irrational people can be and in the process I have become the epithet thereof.

[Azura]

You sound like the sort of person that would be better satisfied with having a partner living separately. The said partner would also have equivalent capacity for thought and could participate in some way in a work of philosophy or something else. Well, as strange as it sounds it's not that uncommon and there are a few famous examples of such relationships.

[carmatic]

Figures it will take a while to get things right. To sort them out so to say.

I'm not against pornography at all. Perhaps not even prostitution, just as long as they are free to chose their clients and so on.

What I was thinking is that men is being exploited financially all the time, when there are better things in life than sex. It's not only the economical aspect that I am thinking of, they give up their lives, emotionally, physically, spend their time, to put some woman on a pillar just to look at her and make her pregnant. People make up all kind of irrational arguments for keeping it up, because it feels so good. They are fooling themselves. They call it passionate or romantic, having a good time, etc. ok i dont normally tell this to anyone but i am also against having sex most of the time, and that it has always been a case of abstinence vs indulgence for me ... in my world, sex is not a goal, its just that people cant help but enjoy it

Being nice won't always work to make people like you. It could have the opposite effect as they find themselves feeling gratitude guilt, that they have to repay the deed somehow. This is flawed because there is a zero progress dilemma in all this. What people really should do is earn some money and most people don't cooperate on a private level. here i disagree, gratitude guilt is good and sooner or later it will be their problem, not yours... if they still dont like you, well ***** them , theyre just nasty people you come across in life ... and earning money has nothing to do with relationships, it shouldnt have to anyway, you will have a good life from having a way of sustaining yourself, and everything else comes with a good life

You are arguing that it's immoral to be chased. I won't fall for that.
just what does this line refer to? the thing about asking people not to have sex?
Why is sex so entertaining? It's more like a drug. another golden book quote?I rather go for an exotic expedition where I have never been before, just as long as it doesn't involve copulating with the local population. Having sex all the time is retarded. There are so many other things that people can do at their spare time. All sorts of recreational activities.
I'm not against sex or relations either. It's just that I rather do other things that make me think. as i said again, abstinence vs indulgence... being in control of your sex life as opposed to the other way round, respectively

What I do is put things into perspective and remove any emotions from the equation completely, just to see what we got. I think it's funny to see how irrational people can be and in the process I have become the epithet thereof. irrational from the funnehs , not from wanting sex... cuz that would just be retarded if you come to buf looking for sex

[Jordan L]

Now this is what I call Things that don't make sense in Porn

[Unreality]

fat chicks :eek::(:eek2:

[pine]

Yeah, that's a worrisome thing.

Yeah, I used to worry a lot about that. But when I finally did manage to have my first sexual relationship, I found out that all that porn I'd watched hadn't desensitized me in the least to the wonders of contact with an other human being and I realized that all my worrying had been pointless.

The main antidote against an unhealthy obsession with porn is having a healthy sexual relationship with a real human being.

[Big-Al]

fat chicks :eek::(:eek2:

it's ok they have big boobs :p

[Adelheid]

fat chicks :eek::(:eek2:

it's ok they have big boobs :p

That's not all.

http://hotlard.files.wordpress.com/2007/12/fat-woman-outside.jpg

[Big-Al]

mmm the ankles :)

[carmatic]

The main antidote against an unhealthy obsession with porn is having a healthy sexual relationship with a real human being.

better yet, you can learn all your sex moves from the pros!

[ant75]

Porn still makes more sense than fuzz.

[Fuzz]

Too true, most of the time.

I know of people that prefer round ladies. My first thought was something in the line "Are you out of your mind?" but it could make sense because they will have very little competition and every single drop of love they can give them will be cherished. Perhaps this is trigging some emotional bounds they had with their mothers?

[carmatic]

there was some research which showed that people generally find partners who are similar to their parents... dont remember much of it, but i remember it was mentioning stuff like girls who have fathers who wore alot of leather are attracted by the smell of leather on guys they dated, etc ... and also i think for guys , they go after girls who have the same hairstyle as their moms or something, not really sure about that
some people cross the line between looking for a particular type of girlfriend/boyfriend, and looking for a particular genre of porn, so its a personal thing to them... to make fun of the type of porn they watch is a very good way of hurting their feelings

[Big-Al]

there was some research which showed that people generally find partners who are similar to their parents... dont remember much of it, but i remember it was mentioning stuff like girls who have fathers who wore alot of leather are attracted by the smell of leather on guys they dated, etc ... and also i think for guys , they go after girls who have the same hairstyle as their moms or something, not really sure about that
some people cross the line between looking for a particular type of girlfriend/boyfriend, and looking for a particular genre of porn, so its a personal thing to them... to make fun of the type of porn they watch is a very good way of hurting their feelings

so what sort of porn are you into?

[Balton]

so what sort of porn are you into?

:eek:

:lol: :-) :D

[Jacks:SmirkingRevenge]

ROUND 2 :rolleyes:


What I was thinking is that men is being exploited financially all the time, when there are better things in life than sex. It's not only the economical aspect that I am thinking of, they give up their lives, emotionally, physically, spend their time, to put some woman on a pillar just to look at her and make her pregnant. People make up all kind of irrational arguments for keeping it up, because it feels so good. They are fooling themselves. They call it passionate or romantic, having a good time, etc.

The problem with this statement, and most of what you say is that you're taking far too much liberty in your assumptions of family life and the general human social connection as it exists today.

You say men are being exploited financially to put a woman on a pedestal and that a man gives up his emotional well being, physicality, and time to be with a woman and must fool himself into thinking he's being passionate or having a good time. This sort of thing may be the case sometimes sure, but it is certainly not the norm.

This sounds more like the warped statements that have slowly brewed in the mind of someone who's stuck in their parents basement and a social outcast than a philosopher who has thoroughly considered the pro's and con's of social integration.
Normal people, REAL people who love life want to enjoy all aspects of it. Men are NOT being financially exploited in their pursuit for intimate involvement rather it is just another part of the bill. You should want to seek out a companion and maintain a good group of friends and this just requires throwing around some cash.

Trust me, if a man could f*ck a woman in a cardboard box, he would.

When you're being real and enjoying life you WANT to seek out involvement with others and you WANT to find an intimate partner (woman, for your example) to share certain things with that you can't with a typical platonic friend. You don't mind spending money on her or spending time with her because it ACTUALLY MAKES YOU HAPPY, you don't have to pretend. You're not giving up emotion, you're not giving up physicality.
You say giving up your life, I say you're enhancing your life. You want to show her a good time (which means you, in turn, have a good time) and so you spend money to go places and do things. Through the course of a natural relationship you will then want to have kids and so you TRY for a baby, you don't just "make her pregnant." For f*cks sake...

Being nice won't always work to make people like you. It could have the opposite effect as they find themselves feeling gratitude guilt, that they have to repay the deed somehow. This is flawed because there is a zero progress dilemma in all this. What people really should do is earn some money and most people don't cooperate on a private level.I'm not sure what sort of people you're being nice to or what grouchy ass city you live in, but where I'm from (middle-America) when you're nice to people they're generally nice in return and will come to like you as you will them. Sure, sometimes being too nice all the time makes people feel obligated but it surely doesn't result in zero progress.
Not cooperating on a private level would be to deny basic human instinct.

Why is sex so entertaining? It's more like a drug. I rather go for an exotic expedition where I have never been before, just as long as it doesn't involve copulating with the local population. Having sex all the time is retarded. There are so many other things that people can do at their spare time. All sorts of recreational activities.Again, your argument is horridly flawed as is your outlook on life.

Sex is entertaining because it feels good (if it doesn't feel good, please kill yourself so the rest of us can fill the hole you wasted). But that's just the skin deep aspect. Sex is entertaining because it is the most intimate experience one can engage in in life and when you're able to share this with someone, especially if it's someone you really love and feel for, the experience goes far beyond words. Sex with your significant other transcends anything else you do in your relationship if both of you are really in it for each other. It is a true bonding experience unlike anything else in this case which extends well beyond the "feel good" aspect.
You want to go for an exotic expedition but not copulate with the local population; you say that as if you're expected to f*ck anything that walks. Wouldn't you rather go for an exotic expedition with someone you care deeply for? Would that not just make the whole experience so much more worthwhile? We all need alone time, don't get me wrong but to say that you'd rather do everything by yourself is just... creepy.
And you don't have to spend every waking hour having sex. Often, when you truly care for someone you just enjoy being in their presence, you don't have to be doing anything at all. Go to your exotic expedition and the two of you can just stroll the sandy beaches or relax by the cliffs and sip some wine.
Having sex all the time is retarded, yeah I guess that statement has some merit. But you fail to acknowledge the fact that sex just happens BETWEEN your recreational activities. Sex doesn't REPLACE the things you like to do. I don't know where you got this notion.

I'm not against sex or relations either. It's just that I rather do other things that make me think.And there's nothing wrong with that!! It's ok to want to passionately pursue the search for knowledge and deep thought! But, again, you seem to think that this is an either/or situation when that is really far from the truth.
Did you ever think you can enjoy an intimate relationship with someone who ALSO shares those same goals of higher intellect? You can have sex AND join in the pursuit of knowledge! WIN WIN!

What I do is put things into perspective and remove any emotions from the equation completely, just to see what we got. I think it's funny to see how irrational people can be and in the process I have become the epithet thereof.Again, nothing wrong with trying to think rationally and excluding your heart from the equation. But if you go through life doing this forever you're going to become very lonely, disillusioned, and then probably die with a grand total of 2 people attending your funeral.
Sometimes you must think your heart, sometimes you must fly by the seat of your pants and go with your emotions. If you can't do this then you have forgotten what it means to be a part of the human condition and I feel very sorry for you.

:)

[Jordan L]

(if it doesn't feel good, please kill yourself so the rest of us can fill the hole you wasted)

the Stinkhole ?

[BobTheBeheader]

What I was thinking is that men is being exploited financially all the time, when there are better things in life than sex. It's not only the economical aspect that I am thinking of, they give up their lives, emotionally, physically, spend their time, to put some woman on a pillar just to look at her and make her pregnant. People make up all kind of irrational arguments for keeping it up, because it feels so good. They are fooling themselves. They call it passionate or romantic, having a good time, etc.Ahh, now I understand your position. good points.
Yeah, I used to worry a lot about that. But when I finally did manage to have my first sexual relationship, I found out that all that porn I'd watched hadn't desensitized me in the least to the wonders of contact with an other human being and I realized that all my worrying had been pointless.That's a weight off of my mind.

My personal pornographic preferences tend to not be things that could get very intermingled and confused with reality. (That is to say, I don't think it's easy to get hentai and reality confused). I'm not sure tentacles are very desensitizing.

The main antidote against an unhealthy obsession with porn is having a healthy sexual relationship with a real human being.So you are saying that an obsession tends to go away a little after entering a healthy relationship?

[Unreality]

but bob would you like having tentacles ?

[pine]

A
So you are saying that an obsession tends to go away a little after entering a healthy relationship?

That was my experience. I recently started a new relationship and now I have actually found myself, bored, thinking about firing up a porn site on the internet... and then a part of my brain kicks in and goes "Do Not Want!" Maybe because it feels like a waste?

It just isn't the same; the real thing is a lot more rewarding.

[BobTheBeheader]

but bob would you like having tentacles ?You mean like, if I were having sex in RL, would I want tentacles involved in the process? Thats an interesting question. I think I could tolerate it if it was with a girl I really really loved, and if the tentacles were like an appendage of hers. But that would be really messed up, and I think I'd prefer leaving tentacles out of the picture altogether.

That was my experience. I recently started a new relationship and now I have actually found myself, bored, thinking about firing up a porn site on the internet... and then a part of my brain kicks in and goes "Do Not Want!" Maybe because it feels like a waste?

It just isn't the same; the real thing is a lot more rewarding.I hear you. I think for me the attraction of porn is a method for relieving stress. I think having a gf would certainly help out in their as well, as illogical as that might seem. As time passes, the fact that I do not have a gf weighs more and more heavily on my mind.

[pine]

Don't stress about it, and don't be too picky, that's all I have to say. You gotta break the ice somehow. It took me 25 years, so ur probably doing good still.

[BobTheBeheader]

Don't stress about it, and don't be too picky, that's all I have to say. You gotta break the ice somehow. It took me 25 years, so ur probably doing good still.Good deal.

Well, I can't "use" porn at all now because I got a poster (http://upload.wikimedia.org/wikipedia/en/2/20/FSN_SABER.jpg) of Saber from Fate/Stay Night, and she's... watching me... and I can't. I just can't. And I'd take the poster down temporarily, but taking her off the wall for a few minutes just doesn't seem right. So I'm basically stuck. Probably for the best.

[Hadmar]

Put a post-it over her head temporarily.

[BobTheBeheader]

Put a post-it over her head temporarily.But that won't make her go away.

[hyrulian]

It'll make her not see, though. I thought that was the concern? ;)

[BobTheBeheader]

It'll make her not see, though. I thought that was the concern? ;)But she still won't not be there. It's indecent.

[Big-Al]

^letting some chick you're not even dating rule your life like that :(

you have to stand up to her Bob!

[BobTheBeheader]

^letting some chick you're not even dating rule your life like that :(

you have to stand up to her Bob!But I'm happy :(

[T2A`]

Having a GF doesn't get rid of stress, it just moves it somewhere else, especially if you have some "needy" woman who never shuts the hell up about anything.

If you need a GF in your life to be happy, you're doing it wrong. :p

[Jacks:SmirkingRevenge]

If you need a GF in your life to be happy, you're doing it wrong. :p

QFTAV

quoted for truth and validity ;)

[Big-Al]

Having a GF doesn't get rid of stress, it just moves it somewhere else, especially if you have some "needy" woman who never shuts the hell up about anything.

If you need a GF in your life to be happy, you're doing it wrong. :p

damn :( i fail at life.

[DeletedAccount69]

Anal Gaping.
"Oooh yeah baby, I can't wait to **** that cute ass, let's have a look in there!"
What?! Whyyyyy? I don't want to see her breakfast!

I want to see her breakfast.

[Sirius]

That's not all.

http://hotlard.files.wordpress.com/2007/12/fat-woman-outside.jpg

Looks like someone shaved Chewbacca and put him in a thong :eek:

[Fuzz]

Doing it in a cardboard box could be cute. At least have to try that, could be romantic.

Never the less. You think that a man should provide for his woman. The concept we all are really looking for is equality.

Let's pretend you are a typical alpha male. You spend just about a fortune on your woman and then what? Sooner or later your will run short of cash. Then someone else will overtake your investments by simply opening up a larger wallet that yours just because she is like a freelance contractor who serve whoever she wants, for money of course.

What if she could spend just as much as you do on everything, together with you? As long as women can be bought, they won't really be free or loved for who they really are and men will hand them money for nothing. Why on earth should you work for her? Is a woman really free if she always is on some mans pay role?

Does it matter if things don't make sense in erotics? It's supposed to be art or at least main stream. Oh and this group thingie with people helping each other to have intercourse, taking turn, giving support or just watching, all humans do that, right? (Little ironic here, but if we were free of all social, economical and juridical matters orgies would be more common, like everywhere.)

[N1ghtmare]

What if you have a partner that doesn't spend too much? And if she does you have a job and get more money? And if she leaves you for a richer man then she doesn't really love you.

[drakon]

What if you have a partner that doesn't spend too much? And if she does you have a job and get more money? And if she leaves you for a richer man then she doesn't really love you.

Pretty much sums it up! :)

[GotBeer?]

Fuzz is such a romantic!

[Kantham]

especially if you have some "needy" woman who never shuts the hell up about anything.

Needy as in "We should do X thing because now is teh boring"?
I don't think there's something such as a "non-needy" woman if so. It's something to deal with everyday, keeping her happy and prove you love her, get rid of hours of gameplay and rather, spend it with her. That's the spirit.

I'd like to be proved wrong.
In short, a non-stop gamer who think a GF is going to solve his problems... no. Not for long. :p

[BobTheBeheader]

As long as women can be bought, they won't really be free or loved for who they really are and men will hand them money for nothing. Why on earth should you work for her? Is a woman really free if she always is on some mans pay role?So, you are either saying that women are whores or that they are men's possessions. Which is it?

I remember seeing some women for sale at Walmart once... :/

[GotBeer?]

I remember seeing some women for sale at Walmart once... :/An 8 yr old girl telling you she'll be your friend if you buy her a doll doesn't mean she's for sale, Bob.

[Balton]

A girl telling you she'll be your friend if you buy her a doll doesn't mean she's for sale, Bob.

buying, renting... he was close :)

edit: post fixed to suit my humor

[toniglandyl]

I remember seeing some women for sale at Walmart once... :/

they were figurines :o

[BobTheBeheader]

I was being sarcastic. :(

[dotnetbeast]

^ Your username should be your pornstar name.

[Jacks:SmirkingRevenge]

Never the less. You think that a man should provide for his woman. The concept we all are really looking for is equality.

Sigh. I never once said you're supposed to be "providing" for her, most women have their own careers these days, you know since you seem to have been living under a rock.

Let's pretend you are a typical alpha male. You spend just about a fortune on your woman and then what? Sooner or later your will run short of cash. Then someone else will overtake your investments by simply opening up a larger wallet that yours just because she is like a freelance contractor who serve whoever she wants, for money of course.

Your view of women as displayed by this completely nonsensical example could not be more backwards. Frankly it's really pretty sexist and entirely inaccurate as far as the average woman is concerned, in the real world... but for a guy who doesn't get anything out of sex, I guess it's not too surprising.

What if she could spend just as much as you do on everything, together with you? As long as women can be bought, they won't really be free or loved for who they really are and men will hand them money for nothing. Why on earth should you work for her? Is a woman really free if she always is on some mans pay role?Again I never said you're having to support her. You do things together, you get her a gift, but she reciprocates assuming it's a healthy relationship. It should come as a given that good relationships are true partnerships, but I'm glad you arrived at this conclusion after further deduction.

Oh and this group thingie with people helping each other to have intercourse, taking turn, giving support or just watching, all humans do that, right? (Little ironic here, but if we were free of all social, economical and juridical matters orgies would be more common, like everywhere.)I can't even begin to address what's wrong with views expressed in this statement

http://www.terminally-incoherent.com/img/facepalm.jpeg

[Fuzz]

I can't even begin to address what's wrong with views expressed in this statement
Indulge me.

Perhaps you are that kind of chauvinist that think a woman could not possibly enjoy a relation free of sexual restraints?

Yes, the art of provoking.

I have seen so many relations go bad, they just can't stand one another. They split up and their children have to travel here and there all the time. It makes sense to ask why. People have become immoral in some fundamental way when it comes to basic decency.

They have no clue when it comes to what the future will bring. They most likely try to find easy ways to exploit one another with deceit and it all comes to an end. People lack simple planing skills.


People have become immoral in some fundamental way when it comes to basic decency.
If you are a secret agent there is another philosophy to live by.


It's an act of love when we deceive the people we care about.
Just a funny line.

I think a lot of things do make sense in mainstream pon too. Guess thats why it's so discreetly accepted and consumed.

[N1ghtmare]

You have seen many go bad, yet there are many more that go right!

[Fuzz]

That's what count.

Just give me a reason, some kind of sign
I'll need a miracle to help me this time
I heard what you said, and I feel the same
I know in my heart that I'll have to change

Even the stars look brighter tonight
Nothing's impossible
I still believe in love at first sight
Nothing's impossible

How did we get to be this far apart?
How did we get to be this far apart?
I want to be with you, something to share
I want to be here, I am not there

Even the stars look brighter tonight
Nothing's impossible
I still believe in love at first sight
Nothing's impossible
Even the stars look brighter tonight
Nothing's impossible
If you believe in love at first sight
Nothing's impossible

I still believe in love at first sight
Nothing's impossible
Music can be great too.

[DeletedAccount69]

Back on topic-Cock vore.

Cock Vore, or CV as it is often referred to, involves using the male penis to swallow someone up through the urethral opening at the tip after which they are pulled down the urethra to the preditor's scrotum. Once in the scrotum, the prey is absorbed or digested inside the testicals somehow, or turned into male cum (sometimes known as Cum Vore) and ejaculated.


A related alternative to cock vore is sheath vore. (see Rarer types of vores).

See also:

Genital Vore

lolo that's hawt.

[Fuzz]

If it's anime, I could understand it being related to this thread, somehow I also get the idea of it all.

I'll take the time to comment on the tags that have popped up.

Of course I don't trade sex slaves even thou I don't really mind the concept. My skepticism to relations in general is based on empiric studies not christianity in any way, I'm an atheist by nature. If I have issues most people will have even more issues and even more severe ones I may add. Someone also decided to add an ad here too, that familiar brand that you use to blend with methylenedioxymethamphetamine to make something called sextasy on the streets.

I figure this is a good thread to ask a question. Do boys toy themselves too?

[Jacks:SmirkingRevenge]

:lol:

ok I give up.

[Unreality]

toy you say ?

[rex]

So what was so wrong with my post that it had to be removed? It wasn't worse than that fat chick in any way.

[carmatic]

Do boys toy themselves too?

http://huckleberry.casperworld.com/images/reviews/Acla_20.jpg
^this guy is probably wondering the same thing

[Nines]

So what was so wrong with my post that it had to be removed? It wasn't worse than that fat chick in any way.

Because it inspired Bob to post a big tentacle sex pic with the sensitive areas covered with mosaics, maybe?

[carmatic]

Because it inspired Bob to post a big tentacle sex pic with the sensitive areas covered with mosaics, maybe?

but at least its censored, so it should be OK, right?

[«BuA»Lurker_71]

The concept we all are really looking for is equality.

I think the idea of equality between sexes is pretty unbalanced... but I blame TV, ignorance, and upbringing for that.

Let's pretend you are a typical alpha male. You spend just about a fortune on your woman and then what? Sooner or later your will run short of cash. Then someone else will overtake your investments by simply opening up a larger wallet that yours just because she is like a freelance contractor who serve whoever she wants, for money of course.

Had I ever had a fortune to spend on a female, I certainly wouldn't feel that it was a requirement to do so. Yes, I want my mate to be happy; but if it requires 2 jobs and a hefty bank loan, she's barking up the wrong tree.

What if she could spend just as much as you do on everything, together with you? As long as women can be bought, they won't really be free or loved for who they really are and men will hand them money for nothing. Why on earth should you work for her? Is a woman really free if she always is on some mans pay role?

Wow. If you know women who expect/desire this kind of treatment, send them to Jerry Springer where they belong. ;)

Does it matter if things don't make sense in erotics? It's supposed to be art or at least main stream. Oh and this group thingie with people helping each other to have intercourse, taking turn, giving support or just watching, all humans do that, right? (Little ironic here, but if we were free of all social, economical and juridical matters orgies would be more common, like everywhere.)

Well, I can see where that might make emotional and physical bonds more open and honest, but from a health standpoint; that's just nuts (no pun intended).

Indulge me.

Perhaps you are that kind of chauvinist that think a woman could not possibly enjoy a relation free of sexual restraints?

A mate's restraints, or her own? A woman requires as much (if not more) physical & emotional attention as a man.

Yes, the art of provoking.

Yes, it's sad that even as evolved as we are, most of our arguments involve 3rd grade tactics...

People have become immoral in some fundamental way when it comes to basic decency.

Perhaps it's that we have spent so much time telling ourselves that relationships can be replaced, "there are other fish in the sea", and so on; that we forget the basic value of a relationship ultimately lays in understanding, compassion, and comprehending the value of togetherness.
People have a bad habit of treating each other as objects that are lacking in value and otherwise easily replaced.

They have no clue when it comes to what the future will bring. They most likely try to find easy ways to exploit one another with deceit and it all comes to an end. People lack simple planing skills.

I don't know about planning skills, but they certainly lack the patience to take each day in a relationship as it comes. Most people treat love like a buffet; they fill themselves up on what looks most appetizing, and leave what is most likely better for them for someone who (rare as it is) can appreciate what it does for them, and can mean to them.

I think a lot of things do make sense in mainstream porn too. Guess thats why it's so discreetly accepted and consumed.

Porn = buffet as described above.

Of course I don't trade sex slaves even thou I don't really mind the concept. My skepticism to relations in general is based on empiric studies not christianity in any way, I'm an atheist by nature. If I have issues most people will have even more