The Alcoholic Olympics
Events include :
The Irish Obstacle Course : An obstacle course with hundreds of handy pints of Guinness lying around. The person who has the highest blood-alcohol level when they complete the course wins!
The "Shot" Put : Throw a shotglass as far as you can. For every meter you throw it the opponent must drink one shot of vodka...last one standing wins.
Swimming : All the normal events, but using overproof rum instead of water. Even if you don't swallow any, the fumes will get you...
"Shooting" : A simple race to down 20 shooters. But livened up by the fact that every player has a BB gun with which to sabotage their opponents drinking efforts...
The Tug O' Beer : A keg of beer is placed in the center of the pitch with two ropes tied to it. Each team must take one rope and attempt to get the keg into their zone, drink it as fast as possible, then repeat...the winning team is the first to be medically declared as suffering from alcohol poisoning.
The Man's Drink : The thinking man's event. Players are provided with the contents of the average bar and challanged to come up with the ultimate "man's drink". The winner is the drink which causes vomiting in volenteers at the lowest levels of consumption. True masters can craft mixes so revolting, the volenteers vomit even before tasting it.
The 100m Liver Dash : The winner of this final event gets a free liver transplant. Essential to win if you want to survive the Olympics.